Distance from Home

baseballmom posted:

Keewart said..."When I saw him walk to the plate I....could....not....breathe."

Man, have we ALL been THERE!   Nervous as a cat in a room full of rockers! In my case, it was the mound, too...But, it usually all worked out. 

I am not sure I"got comfortable" until mid-sophomore year. 

I really don't know how you pitcher parents do it.

OK, the topic is "distance from home" and some great recent posts reflect the nervousness of even our seasoned parents when their sons are on stage somewhere a long way from home.

Here's a different take...  we just had HS sign-ups.  Record number of freshmen.  Consequently, I am getting a record number of individual freshmen parent "feedback" notes, mostly via email, sending me some of the craziest questions, full bio's of sons, instructor/camp/travel team name drops, videos (yes, videos), etc.  This is INCOMING HS FRESHMEN at a small school.  We haven't even started conditioning yet, let alone tryouts/practice.  My prospective new JV coach is having second thoughts.  We've entered a whole new dimension.  My reply always includes some version of... "your son is in HS now, a key initiative of our program is to get them comfortable with handling their own business and we start expecting that the day they signed up."

While the geographic distance is very minimal, so many of these parents are NOT yet ready to let their sons go the distance of finding their own way.  Much work to do.  Your stories provide me with always-needed perspective and patience 

My son went to a boys Catholic HS. It had a long reputation of strong baseball teams and a very stable and respected coaching staff.

There was no parent meeting, no communications, just a notice for tryouts. However, part of that notice was the communication from the coaches that they did not want to talk with the parents about baseball. They made it clear that the only discussions that they wanted with the parents was about our son's welfare and the weather. 

I may not have agreed with the coaches at times; but the message and adherence to the message made my and my son's life easier (it also helped when he was in college).

We were lucky, my son had good coaches, with a well run program. In the end, the team did well and my son was prepared for the next phase of his life.

Fun times:

Kid's due at the airport tonight at 9:30.  He gets mom on the phone.

Kid - Hey, I'm at the airport. Where are you guys?

Mom  - Uhhh........................... Your flight is tonight.

Kid - No, I'm here now.

Mom - ...........................you're f-ing with me, right?

I get on the phone.

Me - what's up buddy?

Kid - are you going to send me my boarding pass?

Me - Sure. Do you want me to call an Uber for you?

Kid - I can do that.

Me - And hold your hand while you cross the street?  I sent you the confirmation number.  Use that to check in online.

Kid - I know.  I tried and it just showed me the flight info and wouldn't let me check in.

Me - Hold on.  ( I look at the website, all is right)  It's fine.  Button on bottom left. Try it again.

Kid - OK. Love you. See you tonight.

I come to a realization.  Duh!   Call the kid back.

Me -  I think I sent you the Christmas flight info. I'll send you the one for tonight right now.  I hope you learned something.

Kid - what?

Me - Don't f with your mom.

 

keewart posted:
baseballmom posted:

Keewart said..."When I saw him walk to the plate I....could....not....breathe."

Man, have we ALL been THERE!   Nervous as a cat in a room full of rockers! In my case, it was the mound, too...But, it usually all worked out. 

I am not sure I"got comfortable" until mid-sophomore year. 

I really don't know how you pitcher parents do it.

With a few years perspective I can laugh at myself, but I can really identify with this.

In my son's case it wasn't even college. Not even high school.  I hate to admit it, but it was 14U summer ball. 

He was playing in a PG tourney for the first time. His team was the first at that age level for a local showcase program. Originally he was brought onto the team to be a catcher who could also eat some innings on the mound  if necessary.

The game was being played in the stadium at Terry Park, which feels like playing in Yankee Stadium when all you have as a comparison is the local rec field.

They are playing a highly ranked team out of Texas.  Their pitcher is a 6'5 lefty. Our pitcher is a 6'3 lefty. (at 14 mind you) Game is tied 1-1 after 5.

I knew our coach wouldn't let a kid go more than 5 so a new pitcher would be coming in for the 6th.  As the sides change, who do I see jogging to the mound? My kid.

I'm sure this has to be a mistake. There has got to be another guy they can send in right? Nope, he's warming up. 

Crap. This is a big stage. This is a big (although empty) stadium. This is a good team. There are literally a dozen people watching. How am I supposed to handle this?

I seriously thought I was going to throw up.

I can laugh about it now, but then I just didn't know any better. I literally felt like he was taking the mound in game 7 of the world series. 

ILVBB posted:

My son went to a boys Catholic HS. It had a long reputation of strong baseball teams and a very stable and respected coaching staff.

There was no parent meeting, no communications, just a notice for tryouts. However, part of that notice was the communication from the coaches that they did not want to talk with the parents about baseball. They made it clear that the only discussions that they wanted with the parents was about our son's welfare and the weather. 

 

That description of your son's high school is 100% the same as my son's, right down to the religious affiliation.

My wife and I were out to dinner last summer and I spied my 2015 son's high school coach at a table with his family as we were being seated. I made a side trip for a drive-by hello and handshake. When I got to the table my wife asked why I wasn't behind her. I told her that I had to say hello to Coach on the way. She immediately picked up on my grin and asked, "He had no idea who you were, did he?" Nope, I said with pride. Son was a 3 year varsity starter.

JCG posted:

Fun times:

Kid's due at the airport tonight at 9:30.  He gets mom on the phone.

Kid - Hey, I'm at the airport. Where are you guys?

Mom  - Uhhh........................... Your flight is tonight.

Kid - No, I'm here now.

Mom - ...........................you're f-ing with me, right?

I get on the phone.

Me - what's up buddy?

Kid - are you going to send me my boarding pass?

Me - Sure. Do you want me to call an Uber for you?

Kid - I can do that.

Me - And hold your hand while you cross the street?  I sent you the confirmation number.  Use that to check in online.

Kid - I know.  I tried and it just showed me the flight info and wouldn't let me check in.

Me - Hold on.  ( I look at the website, all is right)  It's fine.  Button on bottom left. Try it again.

Kid - OK. Love you. See you tonight.

I come to a realization.  Duh!   Call the kid back.

Me -  I think I sent you the Christmas flight info. I'll send you the one for tonight right now.  I hope you learned something.

Kid - what?

Me - Don't f with your mom.

 

Awesome...my first official laugh of the day.  Thank you!!  Happy Thanksgiving

MidAtlanticDad posted:
ILVBB posted:

My son went to a boys Catholic HS. It had a long reputation of strong baseball teams and a very stable and respected coaching staff.

There was no parent meeting, no communications, just a notice for tryouts. However, part of that notice was the communication from the coaches that they did not want to talk with the parents about baseball. They made it clear that the only discussions that they wanted with the parents was about our son's welfare and the weather. 

 

That description of your son's high school is 100% the same as my son's, right down to the religious affiliation.

My wife and I were out to dinner last summer and I spied my 2015 son's high school coach at a table with his family as we were being seated. I made a side trip for a drive-by hello and handshake. When I got to the table my wife asked why I wasn't behind her. I told her that I had to say hello to Coach on the way. She immediately picked up on my grin and asked, "He had no idea who you were, did he?" Nope, I said with pride. Son was a 3 year varsity starter.

Yeah, ILVBB and Mid, we run things in a similar fashion (we do have a parent meeting but all other communication is through the players, we have built a successful, stable program) but I can usually make it to the parent meeting in February before having to lay out the guidelines to the new parents...  been doing so successfully for going on ten years now with just the occasional inquiry prior to that meeting.   The stories I could tell you from this year's incoming group would absolutely blow you away.

I do realize that, in part, it is a good thing.  We have steadily grown interest in our program and more young players are, in turn, seeking out more playing opportunities outside of just the school/Babe Ruth/youth rec season.  Also, there is a particularly challenging scenario for this year's newcomers - we have the majority of our V and JV players returning.  From what I gather, there is a buzz of concern among the newcomers and parents as they "do the numbers".   But, it's still crazy.  The travel ball mentality is permeating in a big way.  Sorry, back to the OP...

rynoattack posted:
Buckeye 2015 posted:

My son got the start last spring at Texas A & M.  It was a 6:30pm Saturday game in front of 6800.  I was watching on TV and had a hard time breathing lol

My wife gets more nervous watching on tv...

I was really missing baseball last weekend and I decided to play a game from 2 years ago on YouTube on the family room TV.  I didn't remember 2017's PA's and I found myself getting tense every time he came to the plate.

My son was a PO starting freshman spring season. He was a conference starter. He usually started the first or second game, on the Saturday DH. 

We still went to every conference game DH's Saturday and Sunday. And week day OOC games. Heck it's baseball. Also all the position players parents are there. Plus it is nice to watch a game in a relaxed manner. Other parents learned quickly not to talk to us when BishopLefty was pitching. We were never rude, buts let's say we we're distracted. Also we have two large dogs. Son loved us bringing them to games. But only brought them once when he pitched. 

It was a fun 4 years.

MidAtlanticDad posted:
ILVBB posted:

 

 

That description of your son's high school is 100% the same as my son's, right down to the religious affiliation.

My wife and I were out to dinner last summer and I spied my 2015 son's high school coach at a table with his family as we were being seated. I made a side trip for a drive-by hello and handshake. When I got to the table my wife asked why I wasn't behind her. I told her that I had to say hello to Coach on the way. She immediately picked up on my grin and asked, "He had no idea who you were, did he?" Nope, I said with pride. Son was a 3 year varsity starter.

I don't know that I consider this to be a good thing, I mean maybe I am a small town guy but I can't imagine being the coach of HS program and not knowing the face of a 3 year starter parent. Full disclosure our HS has 600 grads per grade so it isn't a small school. I understand the separation of player/coach, I am not buddies with our HS coach at all but my son was a 3 year starter and the coach knew who I was during his freshman year before he played varsity.

I mean there off season works outs, fund raisers, booster clubs, team banquets...I just think there is room between being over bearing and involved. Hell my sons college coach knows who the parents are of most of his team...and he has a relationship with none of them that I am aware of.

old_school posted:
MidAtlanticDad posted:
ILVBB posted:

 

 

That description of your son's high school is 100% the same as my son's, right down to the religious affiliation.

My wife and I were out to dinner last summer and I spied my 2015 son's high school coach at a table with his family as we were being seated. I made a side trip for a drive-by hello and handshake. When I got to the table my wife asked why I wasn't behind her. I told her that I had to say hello to Coach on the way. She immediately picked up on my grin and asked, "He had no idea who you were, did he?" Nope, I said with pride. Son was a 3 year varsity starter.

I don't know that I consider this to be a good thing, I mean maybe I am a small town guy but I can't imagine being the coach of HS program and not knowing the face of a 3 year starter parent. Full disclosure our HS has 600 grads per grade so it isn't a small school. I understand the separation of player/coach, I am not buddies with our HS coach at all but my son was a 3 year starter and the coach knew who I was during his freshman year before he played varsity.

I mean there off season works outs, fund raisers, booster clubs, team banquets...I just think there is room between being over bearing and involved. Hell my sons college coach knows who the parents are of most of his team...and he has a relationship with none of them that I am aware of.

Yes, I understand this might not make sense for everyone, but it does for me. My son's HC has won 10 state championships. Some kids choose the school at least in part to play baseball. Every year the coach has a bunch of parents who aren't happy with their kid getting cut, playing time, position, spot in the order, etc, etc. He had people trying to talk to him after games, hanging next to the dugout during games, making comments from the stands, sending emails, sending their kid to his office to talk... you name it. I thought the program made it crystal clear that none of this behavior was appropriate, but people did it anyway.
After 20 years of this, Coach was not looking to make friends with any new parents. (He wasn't a friendly guy to begin with.) The only time I ever saw the guy was at a pre-season parents meeting, an annual banquet/fundraiser and at baseball games. He obviously didn't want to be at the first two. Other than a handshake on Senior Day, I pretty much left him alone. My contribution to his sanity.
FWIW, he does know my wife. She helped organize some team activities that required his ok. (The fact that she's an attractive woman may have also figured into it.)
MidAtlanticDad posted:
old_school posted:
MidAtlanticDad posted:
ILVBB posted:

 

 

That description of your son's high school is 100% the same as my son's, right down to the religious affiliation.

My wife and I were out to dinner last summer and I spied my 2015 son's high school coach at a table with his family as we were being seated. I made a side trip for a drive-by hello and handshake. When I got to the table my wife asked why I wasn't behind her. I told her that I had to say hello to Coach on the way. She immediately picked up on my grin and asked, "He had no idea who you were, did he?" Nope, I said with pride. Son was a 3 year varsity starter.

I don't know that I consider this to be a good thing, I mean maybe I am a small town guy but I can't imagine being the coach of HS program and not knowing the face of a 3 year starter parent. Full disclosure our HS has 600 grads per grade so it isn't a small school. I understand the separation of player/coach, I am not buddies with our HS coach at all but my son was a 3 year starter and the coach knew who I was during his freshman year before he played varsity.

I mean there off season works outs, fund raisers, booster clubs, team banquets...I just think there is room between being over bearing and involved. Hell my sons college coach knows who the parents are of most of his team...and he has a relationship with none of them that I am aware of.

Yes, I understand this might not make sense for everyone, but it does for me. My son's HC has won 10 state championships. Some kids choose the school at least in part to play baseball. Every year the coach has a bunch of parents who aren't happy with their kid getting cut, playing time, position, spot in the order, etc, etc. He had people trying to talk to him after games, hanging next to the dugout during games, making comments from the stands, sending emails, sending their kid to his office to talk... you name it. I thought the program made it crystal clear that none of this behavior was appropriate, but people did it anyway.
After 20 years of this, Coach was not looking to make friends with any new parents. (He wasn't a friendly guy to begin with.) The only time I ever saw the guy was at a pre-season parents meeting, an annual banquet/fundraiser and at baseball games. He obviously didn't want to be at the first two. Other than a handshake on Senior Day, I pretty much left him alone. My contribution to his sanity.
FWIW, he does know my wife. She helped organize some team activities that required his ok. (The fact that she's an attractive woman may have also figured into it.)

LOL I have no doubt an active mom who is easy on the eyes will be remembered...the man is human after all!!

Fair enough, I actually know they exact type of guy you are referring to. A fine coach no doubt but it seems like rotten way to go through life IMO but I get it now.

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