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Local kid that I know chose to go to a JUCO on the other side of the state out of high school. He had some 4 year offers but none that interested him, and his girlfriend was attending a state university twenty minutes away from the JUCO. He performed very well at the JUCO over his two years. He was a starting RHP who was 91-92 and hit 93 at times. He later converted to closer.

By the end of his sophomore year, he got the dream offer from a nationally ranked program. He accepted and signed and was on his way. Over the summer he made a weekend visit and stayed with some players. He learned of two major points that were deal breakers. The coach did not allow girlfriends and there were certain courses players were not allowed to take. Of course, some of those courses were required for his chosen major.

So, he gave up baseball and is now attending the same school as his girlfriend. Weird story.

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Sounds to me like a kid who decided his girlfriend was more important to him than baseball....but didn't want to break the news to everyone that way.....so he made up a couple rules and jumped ship lol.   Not saying there's anything wrong with it....a kid has to do what's right for him....and he is staying in school    Just sayin' the whole thing sounds a little fishy

I guess I can understand how the kid would not know about the "no girlfriend" policy.  I am not sure I would want my son asking a coach "Do you allow your players to have girlfriends?" as it would appear he has other priorities. 

That said, it is all on the kid regarding the bombshell about the coursework and major.  How could he not know that?  My 2017 is certain he wants to do mechanical engineering, and at every visit he made, one of the earliest questions he asked the coach was what was the coach's views about majoring in engineering (or Physics at the LACs where he was considering a 3-2 program), allowing time to do the labs, etc. He could tell really early on if the coach was supportive and if the school would be an option.  One coach said he would support it but then added "lots of kids want to be engineers but change their mind when they find out how hard it is."  That may be true, but that school was crossed off his list before we headed for home. 

For any college baseball offer to be a "dream offer" it sure better include a perfect fit with the player's intended major and it is up to the player to find that out before making any commitment.

A kid from our high school didn't return to a quality D3 program soph season. Being home for the summer made him realize how much he missed his girlfriend. He transferred to the local JuCo. A few weeks later the  girlfriend dumped him. I believe his father nicknamed his son Bonehead.

To quote my high school coach, "Stay away from curves and curve balls. Both with mess with your mind and make you talk to yourself."

Stafford posted:

...and there were certain courses players were not allowed to take. Of course, some of those courses were required for his chosen major.

So, he gave up baseball and is now attending the same school as his girlfriend. Weird story.

How the player's major did not come up in conversation is befuddling. What's your GPA, what's your major, etc., are basic.

I would agree that there are probably some holes in the story... Or maybe some other things that changed from the time he decided to go, or things that were omitted. Who knows

In any event, the person who relayed the story was a family friend who heard it firsthand from the kid. The issue with the courses could happen at any school. The "no girlfriend" policy stands out as very strange.

I think we can all agree that those few years for a kid are a whirlwind. There is a lot happening for them and to them. They are trying to walk the line, while at the same time they are going through puberty, getting licenses, cars, jobs, girlfriends, etc. They are trying to plan their future based on what the think they want and maybe what others want for them. I imagine it ain't easy.

Stafford posted:

The "no girlfriend" policy stands out as very strange.

If true, that is really weird.  I get that it may present a distraction, but then so are many other things that college age kids get into.

If a player takes care of his team responsibilities, his grades, and isn't involved in anything illegal - I don't see why a coach would care about anything else.

Realistically a coach having a "no girlfriends" rule is just asking his players to lie to him. 

Rob T posted:
Stafford posted:

The "no girlfriend" policy stands out as very strange.

If true, that is really weird.  I get that it may present a distraction, but then so are many other things that college age kids get into.

If a player takes care of his team responsibilities, his grades, and isn't involved in anything illegal - I don't see why a coach would care about anything else.

Realistically a coach having a "no girlfriends" rule is just asking his players to lie to him. 

And given the hormone's of a college player, I would say it could almost indirectly encourage risky behavior and party hook ups.  Now your possibly entering accusations of inappropriate contact or sexual assault claims into the equation.  It may be a little far fetched but I could see it as an easy jump.  

The rules a college or coach impose are not secret - the time to learn about the quirks in any program is during visits. The most candid assessments will come from players who are really not shy about telling recruits these quirks.

I have seen an entire team banned from practicing during the weeks leading up to the start of a season because a few players (who were over 21 and lived off campus) hosted a poker party and were overheard by unrelated parents talking about it during a team fund raiser.

There is a prominent school in Utah which has a student code forbidding pre-marital sex and, in the past, other schools have had enforceable codes prohibiting inter-racial dating.

Some coaches so want to micro-manage the boys they make helicopter parents look uninvolved; other's set up broad philosophies for the boys function and stand out of the way except when the player breaks with the philosophy. Parents and recruits MUST try to define (a) which regime is best for the boy and (b) make sure the player can abide by that regime's rules.

There is no one size fits all; I thought my S's coach was way too hands off. S thought I was wrong. S was right; the hands off approach to maturing worked for him, for his teammates, and apparently for the 12 years before he got there.

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