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Originally Posted by d8:
If you are saying much more than this at your son's game you are missing out on a wonderful experience of getting to watch your son do/be a part of something special.

Best baseball experience I ever had was sitting in a Depression Era stadium with an overhang over the grandstand.  It was in the country and I was all by myself on a 85 degree day with low humidity and slight breeze watching my son in a showcase double header.

Drank a few beers and ate a couple of hot dogs and never said a word to anyone and just watched the games.  He had a good day and looked like he was simply enjoying the game and playing. 

 

I don't know why and I can't explain it but the combination of great weather, great old ball park and my joyous son playing baseball just made my heart full.  I am grateful for that day and will always remember it fondly.

 

In 10yo ball we used to have the kids yell, "play hard, play fair, have fun" before they took the field.

 

We absolutely tell both our HS age boys that we love them on a daily basis.  But not at the field. There I'm more likely to say "square something up!"  If we're traveling to the game together it's "get a good pitch."

My 2018 made his first varsity appearance yesterday. When he texted me to tell me he was dressing down, I sent him the following message.

Know your role, be enthusiastic, listen, lead and pick up your players. You got this. I love you.

I don't ever talk to him at the field other than to cheer, but I always try to send him reminders before the game about his actions, not about baseball. His job is to play the game. My job is to help him grow up and be a good person, with or without baseball.

When my son was in high school, he had a summer coach that every time he was leaving the dugout to pitch a game, he would say "Don't screw it up."

 

Every now and then I will text him that on game day, just to keep things light.

 

Yesterday, I happened to talk to him as he was leaving with his roommates to his game.  i said good luck and I love you.  It made me feel good he said he loved me too without hesitation, in front of his buddies.

Originally Posted by Coach_May:

I think this is one of the best posts I have ever read on this site. Heck on any site. Thank You

I agree!

Later on, as your son moves on from HS to either college or pro ball, things become much more complicated.  

The pressure can become intense, for them, for you, so its good to try to instill in them (and you) early on, to enjoy what they are doing and remind them often that you love them for who they are not because they play baseball.

 

Last edited by TPM

Sounds like some great parents posting here. Wish I could have read this over 30 years ago.

 

My older son was extremely talented, we would fight after some of the games. I wanted what was best for him, just didn't know any better at the time.

 

Youngest son was not nearly as talented, I was much more at ease and took it easy on him. Even though he wasn't as good, I kind of did enjoy the games a lot more.

 

Older son played one year of minor league baseball, broke his wrist and hung it up.

 

Youngest son was pitching in the Big Leagues at age 22. Then had TJ urgery and 4 years later played nearly the whole year again in the Big Leagues.

 

Sometimes us elderly people just had to learn things too late. If someone really cares, there is a lot to learn on this site. Always much better when you can learn from the mistakes others have made, than having to learn from your own.

My son screwed up and I still made him smile.

 

When my son was a high school soph the high school season ended one game out of the district tournament when my son was picked off first. Jogging slowly back to the dugout with his head down four dads of seniors were verbally abusing him. They completely overlooked his two rbi single that got the team within one run.

 

His coach didn't need to give the steal sign. He could have yelled out "steal second." Everyone in the park knew he was going. After a large number of throws to first the opposing senior pitcher coaxed him out another half step and nailed him. 

 

Knowing there would be field maintenance time after the game I headed for WaWa (like 7/11) and bought a roll of LifeSavers. I waited in the stands until my son came out of the dugout. He felt so badly he wanted everyone gone before he came out. When he finally came out I tossed him the roll of LifeSavers and told him I still loved him. He smiled and said it's going to take two rolls and a trip to Outback for dinner.

 

Then he asked if I remembered the time he made two errors in a LL game. When I asked him if he wanted to practice tomorrow he said, "I don't suck. I just sucked today. Tomorrow is another day." It's when I knew my son "got it" as an athlete.

 

I've never forgotten that moment because some dads acted like jerks and abused him verbally. Yet he shook it off and managed a smile. Tomorrow was another day. The next high school season was unbelievable. It started 14 for 16.

When my son was pitching in a little league playoff game and he was struggling in an inning in a big game for us. I called time out and took the stroll out to the mound. When I got there I know he was expecting to hear, something about his mechanics or what we was doing wrong. I looked him right in the eyes and asked what would he like for dinner that night after the game, burgers or pizza? He looked at me like I had three heads and I said well I guess it is Pizza then and just walked back to the dugout. Ever since then there was something big in his life,,,,,I would just ask him what he wanted for dinner. My way of saying no matter what happens we still love you and life goes on.

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