For the record, I agree with most everything being said here about parents letting their kids do for themselves, as it is there life and they need learn how to become more adult like given the challenges ahead. The problems come when posters make generalizations on a few issues, and start criticizing. If you ever met me, or my wife, you would never describe us as "helicopter parents" In fact, my son has more freedom and independence than most of his peers, as he has earned it. It is alright for us to disagree about a few parenting details, we just need to keep the judgments to a minimum as it creates unnecessary hostility.
You're too kind (in first part of that)!
In my book you're doing fine. Hang in there and do what you know you need to do as a good parent. It'll all work out.