cabbagedad posted:meads posted:anotherparent posted:This was very similar to my son's situation freshman year and half of sophomore. He was a starting fielder halfway through freshman year, but hit in only 4 total games, even though there were other players with horrible batting averages. When he did bat, he hit decently, so ironically, his freshman BA was over .300. We assumed (and told him) that it must have do with what the coaches saw in practice. In fact, we never figured it out. It ate at son, it ate at us. We knew enough to know that parents don't talk to the coach; we did not know enough to suggest that son talk to the coach. We just had no experience with varsity sports, we didn't know if that was something that was recommended or absolutely the wrong thing. So, freshman year he never said anything, he did hit a lot in the cages after practice. When it happened again sophomore year, we asked his hitting instructor if it would be o.k. if son talked to the coach, and the instructor said, of course he should. Son still felt nervous about talking to the head coach, so he texted (!) the (younger) assistant coach. He then did get more at bats. Junior year he was in the lineup all year, senior year we will find out if the rain lets up so that the season can start.
In hindsight, I wish that we had known to tell him to talk to the head coach, right from the start. He would then have had a better take on it, and a better relationship with the coaching staff earlier on. It all worked out in the end, and it was certainly a good learning experience, but it was a really long freshman season.
Thank you for understanding and the advice. Glad I'm not the only one here to experience this
Meads, one more from me and then I'll step away unless you have something specific you want to ask.
Forewarning - I'm going to be direct and you may interpret as harsh. There is something of value to be taken from what PaBaseball said. It is telling that your son is just a week into this thing and you are having this "hypothetical" already. There is also something(s) of value to be taken from what 57special said if you read into it properly.
It is telling that you latched on to the one post that you feel is someone that has experienced what you are experiencing. Believe me, pretty much everyone here has dealt with that scenario. And, there is no comparison between dealing with it for a week and dealing with it for a year and a half (as anotherparent did). There is also no comparison between demanding that the player take it upon himself to talk to the coach (as anotherparent did) and considering stepping in as a parent. It is telling that you say you have thick skin but consider those other replies "destructive" and "worst advice ever". It is telling that you say you let your kid fight his own battles but are willing to step in and fight for him with something like playing time.
There may be a few folks here (not this thread specifically) that are just harsh jerks just because... but most of the time, when there is direct dialog as in the posts responding to yours, the purpose is to help you quickly recognize that you are headed down the wrong path and nicey nice PC sympathy is NOT going to convey that message. Is this a safe place to express... ?? Yeah, for the most part, I think so. But, you asked specifically if you should talk to the coach or not. This certainly implies that you are looking for that guidance.
Many of us came here initially and got that straight-shooting wake-up call when we needed it. If we can get past our initial butt-hurt feelings the first time around, we find great value in the advice and information given here. I do hope that is the path you take. I really think your son will benefit from it as most of ours and so many others have.
I was halfway into a post...............but got side tracked and closed the window.
When I came back, you had posted this. Conveys my thoughts exactly. Most (including myself I hope) are here to help. I've got a kid graduating in 2 months that played D1 for 4 years, and I'm starting the process again w/ a freshman in HS.
One thing that I will say Meads is this.........enjoy the ride, it will be over soon, and it goes WAY quicker than you can even imagine.
I had a similar conversation with JV parents at game last Saturday. 2 varsity pitchers came down and pitched the majority of innings in a JV game as they had not pitched in a game for 2 weeks.
MANY JV parents were upset, as it took innings away from their son on the mound and/or in the field.
I tried to explain to them that the JV should be considered as AAA. If you perform, you can move up, but you can also lose a spot if someone moves down or up from freshman.
Control what you can control. Don't worry about what you can't.