PG, way to go.
You are right, we often don't realize what we say in front of out kids that automatically makes them think the coach stinks, the player is better, etc.
I will tell you why I love this post. When son was younger everyone TOLD us he should be playing up. He better than everyone, he could we find a better coach. What was the point, he was young, he was having fun. he was learning the skills of playing in a team environment. He was learning it wasn't all about HIM. All would come in due time and it did. We never told him he was better than anyone, ever, we did tell him at times he could be better than his last game, and no matter what except in one instance (too long in a game) never spoke up against the coach, but in general my son has had mostly good coaches. But I am sure that he has had verbal lashings on several occassions for what he feels no reason.
Actually he never came to us and complained, because he knew it would be a s*ck it up, it's not the first time, not the last time.
As stated, we are hearing one side of the story, we don't know you or where your son stands talent wise in relation to others his age. That's tough for me to give opinions. Unless the coach has done something that he can get hurt, he is the coach unless we know otherwise he is a jerk. I would have never asked if "we" could leave early to ice, all coaches wouldhave freaked and son would have freaked that we asked. Bring ice, that is YOUR responsibility.
I am not sure but kind of tired of all the posts that HS coach's have no clue what they are doing. If so, find a good summer and fall team. JMO.
FWIW, if you can't stand this stuff in HS, don't send your kids off to play college ball, you might be shocked. I got a kick out of Dad04's post, can relate as I am sure many of you can as well.