I'd wager that every parent on this board has faced this issue: the balance to strike between realism and the dream.
Who wants to tell a young baseball player that making the majors is next to impossible? But who wants their child to make baseball the sum total of his identity?
That's the delicate balance, as I see it. How do we encourage our kids to reach for and achieve a dream and at the same time make sure they develop all the other skills and abilities they will need to be a success in life, especially if the baseball thing doesn't pan out?
There isn't any single answer. With my son it was a long term discussion. As he reached his teens kids are intellectually developed enough to understand uncertainty, the risk of career ending injury, the odds of making MLB, etc.
With my son, we discussed this kind of thing quite a bit, in the context of the importance of getting a good college education and having other marketable skills - both in case the baseball thing didn't work out AND so he would have something he could do AFTER his MLB career!
So I think it is a long term discussion. Realism, when they reach the age they can understand it without being discouraged. But never tell him it is impossible, or discourage the pursuit in any way.
I vividly remember one moment. Jeff and I were driving somewhere, perhaps to or from a game. I think he was about 11 years old.
We were talking about the climb on the baseball pyramid. He looked up at me from the other seat in the car, and asked: "So, dad, do you think I can do it?"
At that moment, all these issues raced through my mind. How do I not discourage him, but stress the importance of an education, get across the need for a marketable skill in case baseball doesn't end up being his career? How do I use this moment to strike that balance, teach him about the improbabilities of making the majors and drive home how important it is for him not to put all his eggs into this one basket? How do I prevent him from defining his whole identity as his standing in baseball?
But I realized that this wasn't the moment for all of that. There were LOTS of teachable moments, car rides and conversations when I could get those points across. What he was really asking, was "Do you believe in me?" It wasn't important at that moment to teach some lesson about backup plans and keeping other options open.
I said: "Yes. I honestly believe that you could make the majors."
I'll never forget that moment. For some reason it is just frozen in my mind. I even remember where we were - exactly which intersection we were waiting for the light to turn.
I think I remember that moment because I realized in a way that I had never before that the dream IS IMPORTANT. You son wants to know that you believe in the dream too.
There are times to teach the importance of school, the realities of the odds of making the majors, and the necessity of having a fall back plan in case baseball doesn't become his profession.
But there are also times when we should just share in our boys' dream, and tell him that yes, you CAN do it, and I believe in you.