Great question. For us, there was certainly input from my son's HS coach and legion/showcase team coach as to where he should be looking (D-III, in his case). However, neither discouraged him and both coaches made calls and sent letters on his behalf to D-I coaches. In the end, it came down to a place where Jr could envision himself playing. We both felt like the place he chose was the absolute right fit, it just "felt right." Did he have other options, yes, and he actually cancelled a couple of visits becuase the school and the fit was "that right."
Now, what constituted the fit? One was a school that has the rep of NOT over-recruiting. Coach point-blank told us that if he recruits a player, he is on the team (but of course, playing time is up to how the player performs). Looking at D-III, that was HUGE in our eyes. Some other D-III schools that were recruiting him could not guarantee anything other than the chance to tryout. In our case, close to home certainly was part of the equation. Certainly, we did not expect close to home to end up 10 mins away--that was a bonus. Position was also a factor (NOT being recruited as a catcher, in son's case). Also, academics were important, as the school has the major he's interested in. Ultimately, though, it was purely a baseball decision.