Obviously you've been around and understand the game. You articulated what I could not.
Your points are correct.
I think Brendan and the other guys don't have anything to prove, plus they're doing it for a living. Their expectations are different. They want to see improvement from the player and are not so caught up in the final team record. Monetarily, their reputations rely on Johnny Jones the individual getting better, thus they have to be patient and dedicated to teaching the game.
Our only experiences with coaching have been with managers that have played the game. My son has played for 4 managers, 3 having played at a high college level and in the pros.
This "gruff" coach actually runs very productive practices. He's also new, so maybe he feels a tad insecure. I don't know.
My son attends public school, but after a camp he was offered a spot on two private school teams. After shadowing at one, he's wants to transfer there next year. From what I've heard, the coach at his possible school next year is "old school" too, but since this particular coach (you've spoken about his program on this board a few times in the past) knows what he's talking about it will be a no issue. We'll see how he does this year at his public school and take it from there.
Actually, my son really doesn't care about the coach's unfriendliness this year; however, he said it makes the experience and expectations be based on fear rather than enjoyment.
Sounds like most adult jobs in today's competitive economics...
I guess that was my actual point. Our sons are getting a taste of the real world and there is no more mommy and daddy ball. "You're on your own kid"...and maybe that's the way it should be. As a parent, you just want to shelter them from the pain and hardships that inevitably come for as long as you can.
Maybe it's me that's getting the life lesson.
Peace