Most coaches, when they want you, are very clear about it. They offer you a spot, and keep coming after you till you say no. It's the vaguely complimentary things that you don't want to set store by. Many parents and players hear what they want to hear, and can find themselves w/o a dance partner.
The tricky part is when the a coach blows hot and cold, or a RC indicates one thing, and the HC another. Thats when you want to provide some mature oversight, as a parent. I was very lucky with my 2018, as he is a smart, personable type with "street smarts", who was able to handle most all of the recruiting contact himself. Even then, we would discuss different schools, and we both got one situation wrong.