Skip to main content

Reply to "How to tell coach/trainer im not playing for his team"

The fundamental differences in this thread (and the other one) is the difference in a 16 year old making a decision about now vs. making a decision about after he will be 18. Right now the old saying "If you live under my roof your will live by my rules" is coming to mind.

I said I was really confused earlier, but now I guess you could say I am mystified.  Isn't it the same 16 yo kid making a decision - today - that could impact his future life, whether next week or next year?  It sounds like a 16 yo should have the right to make decisions that might affect his adult life (I guess you could characterize these decisions as "big decisions"). but not allowed to participate in the smaller decisions that affect him short term (maybe ruin his summer).  I want my kid to make all the decisions he can on the small stuff and see how his decisions pan out.  When he runs across an important decision as a teenager, then I'll try my best to ensure he doesn't make a bad decision or a stupid decision (may be same decision but thought process is different between the two).

I'm hoping that maybe by 21 yo, I can back away completely, but I'll certainly try to provide "guidance" or "counseling" until then.  I suppose at some point he can choose not to listen, or possibly even clue us in on a decision, but I still think lots of boys don't really fully "grow up" until their 20's.  I would want nothing better than to discuss his decisions and begin to appreciate his maturation.  I love Keewart's idea of letting the kid stay home one weekend.  I guess this could be viewed as a test.  Put in a few safety measures to ensure he doesn't go bonkers and let him test his decision making skills.  I know some kids who would probably hate their parents leaving them as they would end up toeing the line too close.  Others I would never imagine leaving home alone.  Most probably fall in the middle somewhere.  Love the old saying about letting them fail - hopefully fail on the small stuff and end up getting it right on the big stuff.

Last edited by 2017LHPscrewball
×
×
×
×