Im kind of amazed at the number of practices missed and games missed to be honest with you. I have five seniors this coming season that will be on the varsity squad. They have never missed a single practice or game in their entire career. Last season no one missed a single practice or game excused or unexcused. It is very rare anyone ever is not at practice. If they are sick and miss school that is about the only time we have anyone miss anything.
Our team rules are the following: Excused miss - Sick not at school - must call and leave a message for the coach. Death in the family or family emergency. Must bring a note from home explaining the emergency. School work / assignment: Must have your teacher see the coach and explain the reason for the miss. If its because you did not take care of business in the first place its an unexcused miss. If its extra work that the teacher says you need to do then its excused. Unexcused miss: Any reason other than excused. There is no penalty for an excused miss.
Now if a player has a function that he says he can not miss like a birthday party etc or family outing etc we talk to the player and handle it on a case by case basis. What time is the party? Where is the party? Usually things can be worked out like moving practice etc. But to be honest with you they never say anything about missing because we just dont miss.
Our rule is one unexcused miss - sit two games. Two unexcused miss - your gone for the year.
In this situation I dont see how you can tell a kid that he can not go to his grandma's 80th birthday party. What if he doesnt go and she dies (God Forbid) before he has the chance to see her again? I would not want that on my hands. To me I would handle this as a family emergency situation. Its not the same as missing for a birthday party for your mom or dad or brother or sister. This is alot different imo.
I do have one question though. Why would a mom schedule something like this during the HS baseball season? Why not have a regular get together after the game. And then have a big shin dig during the summer when it does not confict with the HS season. JMO on that one.
Our guys just dont miss. This is my 12th year coming up. We have never had a player miss a game for any reason other than they were in the bed sick as a dog. Never for anyother reason. I honestly can not remember the last time everyone was not at practice. How can you run a program when guys come and go as they please and then when called out they have excuses etc etc. If you want to play then be there all the time or do something else.
I get a good read on kids level of committment during the summer and fall workouts. If I see them missing those I usually cut them when we have tryouts. No need to deal with it. The ones that love to play and want to work to get better would show up with the flu if you let them. The others really dont want to play imo.