I have been amazed about the number of posts lately regarding parents posting about their players being (for whatever reason) unhappy. I am sometimes not sure whether it is the player or the parent themselves. Expectations have to be realistic.
Being through HS and college, I myself as well as son have found many times that things weren't always the way he or we liked them. The bottom line is that no matter how wonderful things appear, how good our players are, or we think they are, baseball is not an easy road. Whatever road you take, however far you go, there are always obstacles that one has to face and many times you find yourself questioning your decision. That's normal just like life you have to take each day, each game, each inning, each at bat, each year as it is your first and could be your last and do whatever you can to improve YOUR game, being a good team member and not worry about how the coach is screwing you, someone is better, you made a wrong choice, etc.
Some things I have found along the way that son dealt with on his own, with or without advice.
Will you always get the playing time you want?
Most likely no, in HS and in college. Every coach runs his team differently, in college it is big business. The coach makes decisions and sometimes they don't always seem fair, he has his reasons and that's it, just like your boss at work does what he wants and you have little or no say in the situation. The more you dwell on his decisions or develop and attitude, the less success you will have wherever you are. As we have stated over and over, coaches don't always play the best players, sometimes it's about loyalty, sometimes about experience, sometimes about winning, sometimes because you need to develop your game (even though you think you are the best at that position), sometimes you are not fully in his plan for another year or two. Sometimes you get lucky, a player gets hurt, gets drafted and as a freshman you get an early shot, it does happen often. Make sure that you have summer plans to improve and play as much as you can to improve and get noticed in HS and college. Don't rely solely on your HS coach or even your college coach or scouts at every game.
The coach lied to me.
Did the coach really make you false promises or is this your opinion. Where you so excited to get signed, you didn't realize there were more in front of you, you had to work harder to prove yourself, maybe you were just a backup guy for that program where in another you could have been a starter. Into half a season, how can you complain you haven't had enough playing time? Do that after seasons end. Things change rapidly the farther the season goes, starting pitchers are tired, position starters get banged up. You are now into 20+ games in a 56+ game season. Be patient. Even if you have done well a few at bats, a few innings, doesn't mean you are ready that moment. If a coach tells you that you will be a starter when he signs you as a senior in hS, remember things change, often. The only thing he should promise you as a scholarship player is a roster spot. The rest is up to you.
Did you make your decision on where to go to school on basebal only?
Bad choice, IMO.
Will you get drafted in college.
The truth is most likely not. Even if you are the best pitcher or best batter on your team, a very succesful college player doesn't always equate into a successful pro player or getting drafted. Lots of this depends on you as an individual player, where you play, who you play under, type of program, competition you face and whether a scout thinks you have pro potential. I always think it's better to concentrate on your degree than becoming a pro player, because in reality, that's what is most important. Everything else is icing on the cake, IMO. Remember, things change, a pro prospect in college can become a marginal player, and a marginal player can become a prospect. So much depends on your future potential, your growth and maturity. Because you are a college senior playing your best ever, does not mean you have a future in baseball. In fact, the older you are in college, the less likely you may be desired. You have to have GREAT stuff at 22,23,24 as you are "old" already.
Do I ask my parents to ever get involved.
Never, unless there are issues regarding overuse, and most likely that can only be while in HS. A situation that I know a parent pulled a college coach over to the side and complained about playing time and how unhappy his son was and how much better he was. The truth was the player was not unhappy and the player was not better than anyone else. When given his chance, he didn't perform and lost it to others, even younger than him. Do not speak to anyone else about your situation but your coach.
How will I know that this is the perfect "fit" for my choice as to where to go to school and playball.
Hardest question of all to answer. What appears to be the best choice may not be when you get there. Every program is run differently and you don't know that until you become a part of the team. What may have been a good year before, may not be the year you enter, and that causes lots of tension that may not have been there before you came. You have to learn to adjust to coaches and their demands, possible changes, their attitudes and their goals. If you can't do that, don't play college sports. You'll never be happy, no one is 100% happy, I can tell you that. Trying to get out of a situation because you find it not to your liking, may or may not mean the next place is better for YOU. Don't assume teh grass is greener. Yes, sometimes you have to get out, a good reason the coach is evil, period. Go with the flow, the more you do this the less likely you will be unhappy. Remember, coaches during recruiting are courting you, you don't find out who they are until you are with them 90% of your time and most likely you won't be happy 100% of the time. Are you all happy with your boss all of the time?
My post may have some familiarity, as I have taken some questions or situations posted here for my opinions.
Also, one may argue each situation is different, I don't agree with that. The situation your player is facing most likely has been faced by many before you. This is the norm, not the exception, usually.
Original Post