I have just come out with a book about this exact issue. It is called "Going with the Pitch: Adjusting to Baseball, School, and Life as a Division I College Athlete". I played for Binghamton University from 2005-2009, and though it was the experience of a lifetime, it was also a full roller coaster ride for not only me, but also for my entire family.
As the book discusses, the coach who recruited me left the program before I ever took a step onto campus. It made someone like myself, who really needed the belief and support of a coaching staff to help grow me and help me succeed, experience continuous ups and downs. I would have days where I went 3-4 and got an A on my exam, and other days when I sat shivering on the bench, only left to think about the homework assignment I had to do that night.
So the question you originally posed, how did I, and my family, deal with it?
It took up until my senior year but as I continued to struggle and grow, my maturity set in and I was finally able to take whatever came my way, make the best of it and move on. Once it hit me that baseball was about to end, everything became OK. Of course it was rough when at times I felt like I was getting shortchanged ( or in a slump and unable to figure it out), but I think if you are OK with your preparation and have confidence in yourself then whatever results happen are OK.
To not associate how you or your kid plays on field with who he/she is ( r you) off the field is important. It may seem a bit dumb, but when I played I always felt my self-worth was to some extent connected to how I played on the field. When you associate yourself as a baseball player only (or parent of one only) it doesn't allow you to separate yourself from your daily life. When this happens it becomes much more difficult to deal with the ups and downs as the stakes become artificially higher. Granted it took me 3 long years, but the day I told myself I was only a baseball player when I was playing baseball, was the day I was able to accept the ride I was on, and begin to enjoy it. ( In the book I discuss the exact day, which was a game at the University of Vermont.)
It is never easy when things are going wrong and the roller coaster ride is heading towards a cataclysmic crash, but it is important to find an outlet that works for you. For me it was writing my emotions down on paper.
In fact, it was these 4 years worth of writings while being on the roller coaster ride that provided me the information I needed to write my book on adjusting to college life.
More information on the book can be found at www.GoingwiththePitch.com