During the 7 years from T-Ball through 12u, I was heavily involved with my son's baseball experience. I coached just about every one of his Little League teams. I was in charge and involved with all his personal baseball training. I was the one who picked which travel teams he would play for each season. I didn't push him. But, everything baseball related involved me as much as him.
During the 4 years from 13u through 16u, I backed up a bit. Of course, I was still paying the bills. And, I was the personal chauffeur. But, I handed over his training to the professionals (although I did vet them out). And, I let him pick his travel teams. And, I stayed very far away from anything to do with school ball - never talked to a coach, besides hello back if he said hello first, etc. By this time, everything my son did was self-motivated and I was mostly just a guy on the sidelines - but always there and always in the loop on what was going on.
Then, he started driving at 17 and I started to get further away. I was still the bankroll but more like a silent investor who was his biggest fan - although a silent fan as opposed to someone who was overtly fanatical.
Now that he's playing in college, I'm even further away. I can't go to all the games although I follow them online as much as I can. And, if I can make the game, I do my best to try and get there. I have nothing to do with his training now. And, the summer teams are not anything where I have any involvement other than being a spectator when I can make it. I know better than to ask him baseball questions and wait for him to tell me what he wants to tell me. And, I mostly just listen and think before I react or say anything. Basically, I have removed myself as much as possible and I keep reminding myself that the baseball "thing" is 100% his now. It's no longer father and son. He doesn't need me to help him in any way - except for some financial assistance here and there. (But, that's true for most 20-year old college students.)
It's not easy and I do miss the old days. It was fun to have a bigger part of it. But, I do feel that me moving further back as he moves forward is the right thing to do.
What's the point of sharing this? It's for those with younger kids. Enjoy that time because it's not forever. And, if you end up moving back and out of it, and feel like it is hard and sucks, it's not just you. I'm not automatic with it and have to keep reminding myself to stay away and stay out of it.
Or, is this just me? Anyone else who's been through it experience the same path?