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My kids Frosh season is going well but as a parent it's my duty to nit-pick and second guess the coach the first chance I get. He started the first 3 games, batting 3rd or 4th, playing right field. 4th game he was a DH, still batting 3rd, but got no field time at all. If I wanted to read into this negatively I'd say maybe he's doing poorly at practice not playing his position well. Positive spin tells me the coach is just trying to get some kids off the bench that usually sit most of the game. I asked the kid he says "I dunno".

-- If it seems I don't know what I'm talking about, you'd be right. --

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I guess what I'm being a worry-wart about is, is DHing a good or bad sign generally? Haven't noticed the coach DH anyone else but I'm new to this. Yes, this is freshman HS ball, all 9th graders, 16 kids. School has a JV team too. Glad he made the team and is starting but to me (taking from MLB) the DH is usually the old slugger who can't do much but hit and is on his way out as soon as he stops producing. I don't see my son a liability defensively but I can't be objective.

 

And my perspective is to allow all players to get some time at this level. If my kid was all that he'd be on JV or V.

Last edited by 2016Dad

I wouldn't try to be a mind reader.  You have watched your son play for years.  These coaches have not.  

 

On a case by case basis it can be good or bad.  My son's best friend and teammate has always played short.  Mine has always caught and pitched.  Mine is pitching a very little bit on varsity and he plays JV to get ABs.  Guess where he plays on JV?? SS or 2B.  The parents of his best friend and my wife and I find it funny cause we don't see him that way at all even though he has made most of the plays there.  It's okay because he will catch all summer.

 

My point is the coaches don't see your son with the same biases (good or bad) that you or your baseball buddies do.  Be thankful he is in the lineup because several aren't.  You will drive yourself crazy trying to analyze every move.  

I'll be straight with you 2016. It's probably what you think it is: Coach is questoning his defensive skills. COULD it be that coach is just getting other boys in? Sure. Especially if his team is dominating. But most likely, coach likes his bat (for now. that won't last without production) but isn't loving his fielding. Maybe something to work on.

 

True recent anecdotal story...

I coach V.  Last night, we had both V and JV squads gathered together waiting to have team pics taken.  In an effort to provide some guidance to the JV coach, I asked the JV boys which of them were pitchers.  There were ten.  At least nine of the ten are truly potential contributors on the mound for V down the road and it is too early to rule any of them out.  We play two games per week.  (Keep in mind that Frosh/JV ball is supposed to be largely developmental for V).  When one of those nine pitchers starts a game and is doing well and he continues to ask for the ball again next inning, what do you do as a coach?  You sure as heck don't want to discourage that "give me the ball" attitude but you have nine other guys and you are trying to allocate the remaining 10 or so innings left for that week.  These are the types of things that most parents are not aware of when playing time and position decisions are made at those levels. 

 

That said, should your son be trying as hard as he can to make it really difficult to take him off the field and/or out of the lineup?  Absolutely.

If he's only DH'd one game, I would not worry.  It's early in the season and quite often coaches move players around to find the best mix.

 

It's quite possible coach sees something in practice for him to make that decision.  Who knows?

 

On the other hand, my son is at a DII JUCO as a freshman and I am tickled pink when he's in the game - whether it be at DH (most of the time) or his position (1B).  This was a kid who started for 3 years on varsity and was named 1st Team All District, 1st Team All Region, Honorable Mention State and All-Area 1st Team by the regional paper. 

Well the positive (I'm assuming) is that you're on here venting and saying what's going through your head because if you took this to the coach it may not end well.  Honestly there is nothing to complain or question as to what's going on with your son.  He's in the lineup, playing, contributing and helping the team win.  It's on been a handful of games, he's a freshman and it's freshman ball.  He will get his due if he's good enough.  As cabbagedad said - frosh and JV is about development and sometimes it's tough to get enough innings for everyone to see how good they are.  Practice is a wonderful place to learn the game and get better.  It is supremely vital to the development of a player to learn and produce in practice but where you figure out if you're a player or not is in the game.  There's a reason why the phrase "play yourself out of the lineup" exists - a coach uses a develepmental level team to figure out who is going to be there in 4 years helping to produce.  Those 16 kids on the frosh team will not all be on the varsity team in four years.  My guess is that at least half will be gone by then, if not more.

 

Relax, take a deep breath and enjoy what you're son is doing.  Provide guidance and support for your son because he will face tough times in this game.  He will need someone to help pick him up and not turn him into a victim when he's not in the lineup.

 

Always remember - it's best to be on the field at your secondary position than to be the number one back up at your primary position.  The name of that game is to be in that game.

I wouldn't stress over it 2016. When I made Varsity as a Soph. I was a catcher but I eventually became our DH 3 games into the year. Tell your son to stay upbeat about it, tell him to look for tendencies and tipping pitches. As a DH I didn't have to worry about fielding all I did was study the pitcher, take some air cuts off the tee while the team was in the field and I was ready to go. Don't sit on the bench and shoot the stuff with the bench guys. Always be mentally ready. I DHed my entire Soph. year eventually landed in the 4 hole, and Jr. year I split time with a Sr. at 1B, I played 1B when he pitched. Being a DH can help you develop as a force at the plate. Just have the right mindset and still during practice work on the glove.

Originally Posted by jefftso:

I wouldn't stress over it 2016. When I made Varsity as a Soph. I was a catcher but I eventually became our DH 3 games into the year. Tell your son to stay upbeat about it, tell him to look for tendencies and tipping pitches. As a DH I didn't have to worry about fielding all I did was study the pitcher, take some air cuts off the tee while the team was in the field and I was ready to go. Don't sit on the bench and shoot the stuff with the bench guys. Always be mentally ready. I DHed my entire Soph. year eventually landed in the 4 hole, and Jr. year I split time with a Sr. at 1B, I played 1B when he pitched. Being a DH can help you develop as a force at the plate. Just have the right mindset and still during practice work on the glove.

great attitude right here!

Thanks for all the responses! Not venting or complaining (maybe just a little stress). Would never take it up with the coach, it's my son's thing. I'll sit back and observe as the season progresses and gently suggest to him reasons he may be in the DH role, and if that's how it goes as jefftso said I'll make sure he makes the most of it.

Here's a little twist on the great advice you have gotten, 2016Dad:

 

Support the TEAM. It's so much more fun if you can just do that. If the coach has decided that the best way for your son to contribute is as DH, then support him in that role. I also would stay away from "gentle reminders" about why he's DHing, because you don't know.

 

I say this as a 2Bmom who wasted way too much time during HS thinking he ought to be at SS. He reminans at 2B in college, so it all worked out just fine.  Just relax, have fun, enjoy the games, and support all of the players out there.

Originally Posted by 2016Dad:

Thanks for all the responses! Not venting or complaining (maybe just a little stress). Would never take it up with the coach, it's my son's thing. I'll sit back and observe as the season progresses and gently suggest to him reasons he may be in the DH role, and if that's how it goes as jefftso said I'll make sure he makes the most of it.

My advice is not to suggest anything to your son. Enjoy all the good, let the disappointments go and fill your son with confidence. Anywhere in the lineup is a very good thing.

So let me get this straight.  There are 16 kids on the roster, your son has started every game, and has hit in the heart of the lineup every game and there is something to stress about?  I am going to say this out loud in an attempt to get some explanation.  I don't understand parents?  Your son is hitting 3 or 4 and is playing every game while the are guys that are sitting the bench and your going to nit pick and gripe that he was a DH for 1 game.  Are we serious?  I understand this may look like a rant but I just truly don't understand it. 

 

I have a player who is having a tremendous season thus far.  Every goal that was laid out for him when fall started he has met, including where I needed him to hit in the lineup.  The kid goes 5-5 and steals 4 bases in a game.  The next day the dad asks, "Do you see yourself using my son on the mound this year?

 

I am meaning no disrespect towards any parent on this board and for the most part I have a good relationship with the parents of my players.  I am sorry for high jacking this thread.  I truly do not understand it and am looking for an explanation as to why parents must constantly find something negative, especially when their son is in a successful situation. 

Originally Posted by IEBSBL:

I am going to say this out loud in an attempt to get some explanation.  I don't understand parents? 

Look, getting the correct "tone" across on a message board is difficult. I'm certainly proud he's been starting and batting where he is. I'm not complaining, therefore the "nit-pick" qualifier and smiley in the original post. I was trying NOT to come across as one of "those" parents.
 
Coaches and parents who have extensive game experience, remember most parents don't know the game as well as you do. (You probably deal with parents who think they do!) I posted because I don't know, not because I think I know better than the coach.
 
To rephrase the post:
 
What is a DH? And help me understand why the freshman coach had my son DH for the last game. I'm a clueless parent.
Originally Posted by 2016Dad:
Originally Posted by TRhit:

where is i written that daddy has the right to nitpick coches decisions

What daddy hasn't? It's part of spectating and we have "skin in the game" literally. I don't agree they should make it known to the coach or other parents or the kid.

In HS I only heard husband complain one time about coach, who pitched son too much, too early.  I never heard him complain about college coaches as well. That doesn't mean that he didn't have anything to say about performances.

 

And he never said anything negative to son about any coach.

 

Your son is a freshman, this is a process, why not just sit and enjoy it before it's all over.  DO NOT compare what they do in MLB to what they do in HS.


 

Originally Posted by IEBSBL:

So let me get this straight.  There are 16 kids on the roster, your son has started every game, and has hit in the heart of the lineup every game and there is something to stress about?  I am going to say this out loud in an attempt to get some explanation.  I don't understand parents?  Your son is hitting 3 or 4 and is playing every game while the are guys that are sitting the bench and your going to nit pick and gripe that he was a DH for 1 game.  Are we serious?  I understand this may look like a rant but I just truly don't understand it. 

 

I have a player who is having a tremendous season thus far.  Every goal that was laid out for him when fall started he has met, including where I needed him to hit in the lineup.  The kid goes 5-5 and steals 4 bases in a game.  The next day the dad asks, "Do you see yourself using my son on the mound this year?

 

I am meaning no disrespect towards any parent on this board and for the most part I have a good relationship with the parents of my players.  I am sorry for high jacking this thread.  I truly do not understand it and am looking for an explanation as to why parents must constantly find something negative, especially when their son is in a successful situation. 

BINGO!

Originally Posted by 2016Dad:
Originally Posted by IEBSBL:

I am going to say this out loud in an attempt to get some explanation.  I don't understand parents? 

Look, getting the correct "tone" across on a message board is difficult. I'm certainly proud he's been starting and batting where he is. I'm not complaining, therefore the "nit-pick" qualifier and smiley in the original post. I was trying NOT to come across as one of "those" parents.
 
Coaches and parents who have extensive game experience, remember most parents don't know the game as well as you do. (You probably deal with parents who think they do!) I posted because I don't know, not because I think I know better than the coach.
 
To rephrase the post:
 
What is a DH? And help me understand why the freshman coach had my son DH for the last game. I'm a clueless parent.

My suggestion is get a rule book and educate yourself.

The DH in HS, college is not the same as the DH in proball and was he used as the DH or as an EH?

How are we supposed to know why your son's coach used him that way? Get used to it, your son can be used at anytime in anyway any coach wants especially in the beginning when he is trying to figure out who goes where and when, he's learning too.

 

If you came here to learn, why would you claim that you came here to nit pick the coaches decisions? Unless the coach puts your son in harms way, it's yor duty to support his decisions for the TEAM, not just your son. If you wish your son to play after college, get used to that concept, there is no i int TEAM!

 

 

Last edited by TPM

There's another post on this site where the OP ask "Where is everyone?" My guess is they went someplace else after they asked a question here and got a load of crap for asking from some of the old time posters on this site.

 

 - 2016 simply asked a question about what something concerning his son.  He didn't talk bad about the coaches, didn't talk bad about the other players, didn't talk bad about the team.  He even made a joke and posted a smiley face to show he wasn't too serious. 

- 2016 said it wasn't something he planned  to complain about to the coach, other parents  or his own  kid.

- For his trouble, he gets some good answers from some knowledgeable posters. Coupled with those, however, are posts questioning his temerity for nitpicking the coach (which, btw, he wasn't. Rather he was simply asking why the coach may have decided to do this and was it something to worry about), not supporting the team (don't think he ever said he didn't), and letting him know that if he wanted his son to play in college and beyond then he'd better get used to wondering (don't think he mentioned college and this is a high school baseball website, fwiw.)

 

No wonder people post here only briefly and then leave!

 

2016 asked a question because he ha has some concern and he thought he might gain some insight from people who have been through the same thing with their kid, or who have more extensive knowledge of baseball than he. Yes, some of you may have heard this question from clueless freshman parents numerous times over the years that you have used to amass 10,000+ posts on this site. But it is new to him, the first time he has asked it, and he asked it in a friendly, non-confrontational manner. He deserves to be answered with some measure of respect. Barring that, just ignore him and his question altogether.

 

If people continue to ask questions about high school baseball and other people answer them in the same vein in which they are asked, this will continue to be the best baseball site on the web. If not, it will be just a couple of people talking to themselves.

Originally Posted by KC Dawg:

There's another post on this site where the OP ask "Where is everyone?" My guess is they went someplace else after they asked a question here and got a load of crap for asking from some of the old time posters on this site.

 

 - 2016 simply asked a question about what something concerning his son.  He didn't talk bad about the coaches, didn't talk bad about the other players, didn't talk bad about the team.  He even made a joke and posted a smiley face to show he wasn't too serious. 

- 2016 said it wasn't something he planned  to complain about to the coach, other parents  or his own  kid.

- For his trouble, he gets some good answers from some knowledgeable posters. Coupled with those, however, are posts questioning his temerity for nitpicking the coach (which, btw, he wasn't. Rather he was simply asking why the coach may have decided to do this and was it something to worry about), not supporting the team (don't think he ever said he didn't), and letting him know that if he wanted his son to play in college and beyond then he'd better get used to wondering (don't think he mentioned college and this is a high school baseball website, fwiw.)

 

No wonder people post here only briefly and then leave!

 

2016 asked a question because he ha has some concern and he thought he might gain some insight from people who have been through the same thing with their kid, or who have more extensive knowledge of baseball than he. Yes, some of you may have heard this question from clueless freshman parents numerous times over the years that you have used to amass 10,000+ posts on this site. But it is new to him, the first time he has asked it, and he asked it in a friendly, non-confrontational manner. He deserves to be answered with some measure of respect. Barring that, just ignore him and his question altogether.

 

If people continue to ask questions about high school baseball and other people answer them in the same vein in which they are asked, this will continue to be the best baseball site on the web. If not, it will be just a couple of people talking to themselves.

Well said.

KC,

You see it one way, some see it another.

 

No problem in letting us know how his son is doing. My opinion is that he knew that what happened was not a bad thing.  He also made a comment all dads nitpic and that is so far from the truth.

Some say I am just a stupid mom, I have no clue about a lot of things, it doesn't make me run away or not post.  That's his decision.

If it is new to him, go get some reading material and try to understand as much as you can, it's a lot easier than coming here trying to be funny while asking a question that no one can really answer (why was the coach doing this).

 

 

JMO

 

Last edited by TPM

I am not bitter and not being mean. 

See my very first post.

I don't agree with the post of  "what daddy hasn't"? Is it fair to lump all daddys together?  That was unnecessary!  

Why can't folks (moms and dads) just sit back and relax and take it in and enjoy the experience, instead of trying to figure out what everything a coach does means. I think they will enjoy the experience so much better.

Maybe some day when some of the folks here get to the point where their kids are no longer playing the game, they will look back and say, "hey I SHOULD have enjoyed the experience instead of worrying about everything".

Now I admit that I don't always follow my own advice. I wish that someone had told me way back when not to worry over so much, so much stuff that is just part of the ride.  I mean, honestly there are folks reading whose kids never get a chance to play as freshman, this one wants to know why he just DH's that day?  DAD, BE HAPPY!

 

JMO, if you don't like it, don't read it!

 

"What Daddy hasn't" was a joke referencing the stereotype that all Dads - especially newbies - second guess the coach. It wan't an actual accusation directed at anyone on this site.

 

And while it's true that no one can give a definitive answer to what his coach is thinking, they can speculate, which is what most people do on message board. Or perhaps they can give an example - whether positive or negative - about a similar situation and what happened. It's called a conversation van anvan an be pretty cool.

 

As for being a Mom, that matters not a bit as it pertains to baseball knowledge, which you certainly possess. 

jp,
I think that you need to go back and read what I posted.  I never said anything about not being knowledgeable but rather that I could have taken more time to enjoy the ride.  And again go back and reread my first post.
Sorry I can't change how I feel. Too many folks worry about too many things. I didn't see the post as being funny just as you see mine as not choosing my words more carefully. 
We all see things differently.   There is MY happy face.

 

2016 This should be a great place to come with your question, not the library as some might suggest. I hope you will find this to be a great resource for a long time to come. By definition "nit-picking" is a small minor detail which I think perfectly frames your question acknowledging that your son is still getting some playing time. I think it is perfectly natural and wise to wonder why a role change takes place. You have received some great advice already. Mine would be mostly about communication and effort. Your son should let the coaches know of his goals and desires by word and action. His hitting skills are obviously appreciated. Keep working on those but figure out what else is needed, i.e. foot-speed, quick first step, or tracking fly balls....

 

“Some” know what they’re talking about.

 

Originally Posted by TPM:
jp,
I think that you need to go back and read what I posted.  I never said anything about not being knowledgeable but rather that I could have taken more time to enjoy the ride.  And again go back and reread my first post.
Sorry I can't change how I feel. Too many folks worry about too many things. I didn't see the post as being funny just as you see mine as not choosing my words more carefully. 
We all see things differently.   There is MY happy face.

You amaze me, TPM. I say tongue in cheek that you think you know it all, and you agree. Heads up, mom: It's what you learn AFTER you know it all that counts. This is not about how you FEEL ... it's about what you SAY to newcomers. This is not my happy face

Lighten up? Lighten up??? Come on. YOU would be the one who's consistently unwilling to lighten up, TPM. I have read your posts for two years. I have a 2016 who may well make it as far or farther than your son. We are Cardinal fans from St. Louis, so I want badly to like you. YOU need to listen once in awhile and respond to what people SAY, not what you THINK they say. I am becoming convinced that you run more people off of this board than you help, Maybe it's time to move on. Or chill. I hope you chill, because even though you don';t REALLY know it all, you do have experience. That could be valuable ... if you'd think before you type.  

Originally Posted by jp24:

Lighten up? Lighten up??? Come on. YOU would be the one who's consistently unwilling to lighten up, TPM. I have read your posts for two years. I have a 2016 who may well make it as far or farther than your son. We are Cardinal fans from St. Louis, so I want badly to like you. YOU need to listen once in awhile and respond to what people SAY, not what you THINK they say. I am becoming convinced that you run more people off of this board than you help, Maybe it's time to move on. Or chill. I hope you chill, because even though you don';t REALLY know it all, you do have experience. That could be valuable ... if you'd think before you type.  

 

Whoa,let's take a breath jp24... Not sure what offended you so much and I'm certainly not sure with what your son "might do" in the future has to do with anything however I think you’re a bit over the line on this one.  While some of the old timers aren't always part of the welcome wagon, the trade off is if we listen to what is being said it can be of great value. To suggest TPM (or others) move on because they speak the hard truth is a grave mistake   While you may not like her direct method of communicating, TPM has helped more people on this site than you probably have post (myself included).  

 

Come on...no disrespect to the OP however did TPM's (and others) suggestion to not worry so much, learn the game (read a rule book)  and enjoy the ride warrant such an attack?  


I think not...so yeah...let's all lighten up a bit   


Edit:  By the way 2016dad I forgot to welcome you aboard...hope you don't run off and continue asking questions.  As you have found out you will be provided with plenty of opinions, the good thing is you will start to see things from many different POV's and make  some great friends .  I found the HSBBW to be much like moving into a new school mid-year..it might be a little awkward getting acclimated however once you get to know the personalities you will find this place to be a treasure chest of knowledge. Good luck! 

Last edited by jerseydad

Maybe so. I'm just a little tired of the attacks on people just soliciting help. I'll chill -- but just to be clear ... the only reason I reference my son is that it honestly seems like TPM believes that her own's son success somehow entitles her to say whatever she thinks, however she wishes to say it -- regardless of how it makes others feel. I'm all for tough love, but I do believe she runs people off. Maybe there was a time she was helpful. Not so sure anymore.

 

Last edited by jp24
What success?  A free agent who has had 3 surgeries trying to stay in the game (and hasnt played for stl in a year).
See you just illustrated my point...you guys are so caught up in success your sons may or may never have you seem to lose sight of what is really important. 
And you can figure out what that is for yourself.

Lets all just take a step back here.

 

TPM is right about one thing, Step back and enjoy the ride.  The kid is a freshman.  Most Freshman are treated like, well Freshman.  No matter how talented the kid may be or may become the fact is that most Freshman on Frosh teams are in developmental mode.  Our Freshman team this year has something like 20 kids on it.  Of course kids are going to rotate in and out of the games, some will play more than others but it is irresponsible of the coach to play only 9 or 10 out there and let the rest of the kids sit on the bench.  That doesn't develop kids for JV and later for Varsity. 

 

Expect your kid to sit at times, even if the kid is better than some of the other kids out there.  The purpose of Frosh teams, and even JV teams, is to develop the kids for the future.  Playing time is important for sure but learning how to play at a HS level, with HS rules against other HS kids is important, for all of the boys on the team.

 

Parents can screw it up for boys, seriously by putting too much into things.  Last year my son played Freshman ball, as a Freshman.  Seemed appropriate.  He was the 'starting' 2B and played a fair amount of 3B as well as pitched.  Yay for him.  There was another kid that was athletic but very very raw that started out as our third baseman.  The coach would put the kid out there for a couple of innings but usually by the third or fourth inning the kid would be pulled because he would make repeated errors, mostly judgement mistakes.   The kid was a good kid, nice kid, and seemed to enjoy himself.  Of course my son would slide over and take his spot because Dan can (normally) field a ground ball and make the throw to 1B without issue. 

 

I used to listen to the mother of this kid complain every time he was pulled, talking about how he wasn't getting his chance and why some other kid has to play her son's position, like it was handed down from God himself.  I bit my tounge because the kid was a good kid and was a great teammate.  And I could see he was talented, he just needed practice and work.  And he got that and improved as the year went on.  My son was and probably always will be a better fielder and hitter but the kid probably would be a good player, certainly a Varsity kid as a senior.  But he didn't go out for baseball this year, mostly because his mother and father didn't think the team was being 'fair' to him. 

 

It makes me sad because the kid loved to play and would have been happy just to put on the uniform.  Now he is doing nothing because a parent didn't think he was being treated 'fairly'.

 

Don't read too much into anything is my point here.

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