The problem can be this.... young parents want for their children we all do.... but unless you are being honest with your self and willing to listen and be open minded to the fact Jonny is probably not as good as you think then we cannot help you.....
boy ! how time flies!
2020dad posted:You know I have been following a couple threads lately with the same theme we see so often 'you don't understand, someday you will'. And the people on the other side don't understand why their point is not understood... Kind of a mess. I think maybe everybody is right. It's a matter of haves and have nots some time. I don't understand directly what it's like to have a son who is a big time recruit. Probably never will. And in fairness I think sometimes some folks here don't understand what it's like to have a kid with moderate ability who works tirelessly and truly devotes himself but in the end may just fall a little short. There are kids who are just born with it. i am sure many also work hard but let's be real here. A lot of those kids throwing upper 80's lower 90's in high school have rich pedigrees and an abundance of talent. I will never know what that is like. Then there are kids that just don't have a crumb of ability and it's over before it starts. Then there are those like mine. Good enough to continue waging the battle but may or may not win the war. I wonder sometimes if there is really a place for folks like me who just love talking baseball regardless of the fact I may never get to come on here and say my kid committed to xyz power 5 university. And I wonder if there is a place for those other families who are just really excited about their kid the baseball player even if he just kind of sucks. Probably hard having the superstar sometimes, pressure jealousy etc. I can attest it is hard having the middling and listening to his dreams and watching him truly work toward it and knowing it may never happen i am sure it is tough for the less fortunate to admit it's over even as they are just starting high school. I guess I am getting old and soft but i wish we would all really try to put ourselves in each other's shoes and try to understand.
2020dad your son is just like my son was. He has always had to prove himself to coaches, players & parents. He wasn't the biggest, stongest and certainly not the fastest kid. In fact he had some of the lowest sparq scores around. But then he grew. He's always been able to perform on the field when given the chance. He's always been the leader on his team in BA & RBI's. On the mound he lead his HS in wins for three years, yet probably never touched 80. He's the kind of kid that just gets it done. He loves baseball, studies baseball and wants to work in baseball. He's realized that he won't play professionally and is okay with that.
As a parent its one of the hardest things to do but we told our kids to have dreams but you always need a backup plan. He did get a chance to play in college but injuries have taken their course and he isn't able to play at that level anymore. This year he decided to play Club Baseball at his college and is actually having a blast. He says that this is the first time in years that he is having so much fun playing. As a parent that makes me very happy.
The problem with kids like ours and recruiting is the getting noticed part. When my son went to showcases he always did well but he was maybe 5'8" and didn't look the part. Now 4 years later he is 6'2" and looks the part. Life is like that and you just have to deal with it. The really frustrating part for me is seeing so many kids that have the talent but not the work ethic quit playing baseball. Several have quit even after getting recruited and arriving on campus.
I will say in closing like so many have said before, try to enjoy ever moment you get to watch your kids do something that they like. My wife & I really miss getting to watch our son play (he's 1,000 miles away from home). On the plus side its great watching our kids turn from kids into adults.
2020dad posted:maybe his six pack of abs helps - my six pack was a little different.
PBR? 
Golfman25 posted:2020dad posted:maybe his six pack of abs helps - my six pack was a little different.
PBR?
I am a Bud Light kind of guy!
bacdorslider posted:The problem can be this.... young parents want for their children we all do.... but unless you are being honest with your self and willing to listen and be open minded to the fact Jonny is probably not as good as you think then we cannot help you.....
Again - Great point...I get it...and I'm old. I saw some very good players who never even sniffed the show. I also dealt with parents who only have 'rose-colored' glasses.
I agree that you just can't help some people and my message usually is consistently about perspective. Making sure that kids don't feel like their value to their parents is attached to a game.
I think the one thing I have mentioned more than anything else on this site.
There is NO one way or approach. If there are 750 MLB players at any one time, there are 750 different stories. There are all types of parents and 750 paths taken.
Now, that isn't to say there are wrong paths to take that will make things much more difficult. But there are so many different ways to look at things.
Seems most that post here are not among those living in poverty. So professional baseball appears to be a bad decision. Even though it is something that nearly every young player wants. Everything from the money to the living conditions and more seems to be a negative. Often the signing bonus/offer is discussed and it seems like the discription used most often is that it needs to be "Life Changing Money".
So what is life changing money? Honestly, some of the places I have been, life changing money might be the equivalent of a couple meals and a roof over head. That money to you might be millions, to others it might be $20,000. Sure college is an option, but for some a 90% scholarship still makes it impossible. For others college isn't even considered.
I know this is off topic, but regarding this topic, the point is "NO" it is nearly impossible for us to understand each other completely. And for damn sure we will never completely understand everyone on a message board. Of course that doesn't mean there is nothing to learn by listening to what others think. Just need to know that everyone doesn't think the same way about everything. And when it comes to being a parent, you are in charge of handling that. No advice coming from here. Just wish you luck.
roothog66 posted:bacdorslider posted:TPM.... she just tells it like it is.
Maybe she should run for president.
Hmmmm... where have I heard that one before? 
bacdorslider posted:The problem can be this.... young parents want for their children we all do.... but unless you are being honest with your self and willing to listen and be open minded to the fact Jonny is probably not as good as you think then we cannot help you.....
This post has been written a thousand times by the "mount rushmore" of posters. I think most get it.
And his name is not Johnny.
2020dad posted:I am just really confused as to how I am making this about me??? His dream not mine. As for my other son I had never been to a swim meet in my life before he swam. So that certainly isn't my dream. Lots of people here talk about their kids informatively by example or just plain out of pride. I think that's great. How is any of this about me? And yes I do stress on behalf of my son. Who doesn't want to see things work out for their kids? I guess again what I am saying is when your kid is the stuff (swimmer) you don't have to do anything but sit back and enjoy. When your kid is possibly able but needs a ton of effort (baseball player) to get there then I am going to join his effort with mine.
Nothing wrong with being proud of your sons accomplishments. Any old timer from this forum that says they haven't bragged a bit on their kid isn't being honest. I believe most of us signed up on this board to brag a bit on our sons achievement. And most on this board have sons that are exceptional. My two older sons played baseball but I wouldn't have joined this board because they were average and never would have gone to college to play the sport. The reason I'm on this board is to learn about how my son can get to the next level.
here is a good read on Paul Goldschmidt and is another good example of where you are today almost doesn't matter. Improve 1% each month!
Thanks for the update on the original intent of the website, i guess i only read the HS and college related posts and am new to this forum. I'm sure there were kids in my son's 2015 class that would have been recruited in 7th-8th grade (current climate) if this is really the case. Tyler Stephenson comes to mind as he was verballed to Tech in 9th grade.....it probably was decided or on the way there in 7th or 8th as he was at EC well be fore then, 7u i think.
Others could have as well, we had a loaded class. Congrats for the kids who are good enough to catch the fire and get noticed/courted by these college programs. As many say and have said and continue to preach it.......it's a long road from there to signing the NLI and alot can change not to mention the school can back out anytime they find a better fit.
bacdorslider posted:roothog66 posted:bacdorslider posted:TPM.... she just tells it like it is.
Maybe she should run for president.
Maybe.... she can be a bit cruel in her approch sometimes... BUT these younger parents come on the board acting like theirs is the end all be all... as a 2018 or 2019 or 2020.... and then they get their feeling hurt ..come on... you want to play big big ball you better wise up... there are more down times than good times... you guys wanting all this for your children and have not had the first phone call from your son at college when things are all shit for him at the moment.
You think it's roses playing SEC baseball? Wait til the press talks about your son like he has no business on the field .... wait til that coach that 'loved' your son and outright lied to you about his role. Wait until the scholarship dollars change, wait til he brings home a girl , has to drop a class or two.... the coach moves to another school
Not to mention pro ball that is a huge cruel, scr**w you business..... And you want to whine about TPM telling you the truth when you asked for it advice about whether a 2019 can play high level D1 ball? I get it the parents that come on here and act like they are settling for D3 ... you know the ones that say well I know he could play D3 ball ... really.... try completing a international relations degree from Tufts...
Heck we dont know if your son can play LL for that matter... be honest get a real assessment, and for the love of god get an education out of it.... no one ever asks about the education side of playing college baseball..
Worry about the next pitch... it might be your last.... dont worry about the next season....
Ok I'm done.
How about us parents that came on here to learn and the minute we said anything about a 2020 we heard stop obsessing, this isn't about you, enjoy the moment, your kid won't be the next Jeter, don't talk about recruiting or showcase until he makes varsity.
um, my kid doesn't even play short stop and I just asked what a showcase entails....but that right there is a very typical response that seems uncalled for. It's like some people have a cut and paste script. Any question relating to a 9u-14u player all answers will come from the "go away" script.
I've been going to the eye doctor for a long time. Every few years he adjusts my prescription so that I'm able to see things more clearly.
This website helps me in a similar way. Difference is, I'm able to learn from you all and adjust my "lens" a few times a month.
I'll read a post which forces me to hit the "reset" button, and consider a different view. I'm constantly learning and shaping my view to keep my expectations in check. I want to support my baseball playing sons and their dreams. I hope I'm able to provide doses of reality along the way, while not squashing their dreams.
I learned that I wanted college baseball more for my 2016, than he wanted it for himself. He was losing his desire to extend his baseball to college. I was pushing him too much, and our relationship was going down hill. What? Me? How could that happen?
This site helped me call BS on myself. I was able to throttle back my intrusive enthusiasm and support my 2016 for what he wanted. He didn't want a full time job as an athlete while being in college. He wanted a warm weather big D1 sports program which had a decent business school, where he could enjoy being a student.
He's happy he had interest from a number of colleges who saw him play the past summer, and that was cool enough for him.
Hopefully my new found tempered and realistic enthusiasm will help my 2018. He wants it, I'll support, but it's about him. I'm letting him pursue his dream, wherever it takes him.
(Edited a few typos out)
PGStaff posted:I think the one thing I have mentioned more than anything else on this site.
There is NO one way or approach. If there are 750 MLB players at any one time, there are 750 different stories. There are all types of parents and 750 paths taken.
Now, that isn't to say there are wrong paths to take that will make things much more difficult. But there are so many different ways to look at things.
Seems most that post here are not among those living in poverty. So professional baseball appears to be a bad decision. Even though it is something that nearly every young player wants. Everything from the money to the living conditions and more seems to be a negative. Often the signing bonus/offer is discussed and it seems like the discription used most often is that it needs to be "Life Changing Money".
So what is life changing money? Honestly, some of the places I have been, life changing money might be the equivalent of a couple meals and a roof over head. That money to you might be millions, to others it might be $20,000. Sure college is an option, but for some a 90% scholarship still makes it impossible. For others college isn't even considered.
I know this is off topic, but regarding this topic, the point is "NO" it is nearly impossible for us to understand each other completely. And for damn sure we will never completely understand everyone on a message board. Of course that doesn't mean there is nothing to learn by listening to what others think. Just need to know that everyone doesn't think the same way about everything. And when it comes to being a parent, you are in charge of handling that. No advice coming from here. Just wish you luck.
Thanks for the levity intentional or unintentional. I had to laugh when you got to the part when you just flatly said 'no'. We will never really understand each other. Maybe that's the trick is to just respect differences and realize true understanding is a pipe dream. However politeness as you always display is still possible.
Slight drift here: one of the things that makes me interested in following D1 commits on Perfect Game or hearing stories from the parents of D1 kids here is this: Now that my kid's a HS Junior playing his 3rd year of HS, he's gone up against a bunch of good players, including several D1 recruited pitchers. So for the kids who have already graduated HS it's fun for both him and me as a dad to look up college stats and see how they're doing. This year, the team has faced D1-committed pitchers in 2 out of 3 games so far, with another coming today if they get their game in. My kid doesn't expect to be recruited by D1 schools. He's not even sure he wants to play in college, but he and all of his teammates are intensely interested in going up against these kids. It makes the game more fun and challenging for him. And of course he can tell you what kids he has done well against, and vice versa.
2020dad posted:2017LHPscrewball posted:I think most of us here could rightly be accused of false humility if we said we are nervous about our son making the high school team
I think that statement may be a little too broad and aimed at an existing population of posters - not necessarily some mom or dad who stumbles across this site looking for answers. When some new poster comes on here and asks whether his 8th grader's velocity is good enough for D1, then by all means cut them off at the knees. Conversely, if they ask if it is good enough for high school, that person needs some appropriate feedback. I will tell you my 2017 making the high school team was not a certainty. In fact, when they selected a handful of 8th graders to join the freshman team, my son was not in that group. Luckily they fielded a decent size freshman team and he made it in 9th grade and rode the pine a good amount of the time -now #1 pitcher on varsity and probably not starting in OF to protect his arm. Did not help that he was the youngest ballplayer in his class, but he probably needed another year to grow and develop. If for some reason he had gotten overlooked in 9th grade, then he may have simply hung up his cleats. Just yesterday someone posted about the kid who played 4 years riding the bench only to get his shot late senior year which allowed him to get into college, then pro. Sounds like there may have been some concerns over whether or not he would make the cut each year.
Not calling you out and assume you are addressing some known posters (who probably/rightfully have zero concern about making the HS team), but didn't want the casual visitor read that the wrong way. Some good advice on this board about how one goes about making the high school team.
Point well taken. Not really calling anyone out but I guess just make assumptions that those on here have kids that are bare minimum for sure hs players. But you are right that is probably a poor assumption. And I certainly am all in favor of helping and encouraging them as well.
Your bare minimum for hs players and mine are VERY different. This past year 9 seniors graduated, which was great for the class of 2019. However, only 3 seniors are graduating this year, not so great for the class of 2020 which contains players from 4 different national baseball academies. I don't think my kid is a lock for high school in 9th grade, but I know he will keep trying.
Sorry Caco, I think we have a misunderstanding. I am not talking about playing varsity as a freshman. Just playing high school baseball in general. I have no idea if my son will play freshman, JV or varsity next year.
roothog66 posted:Also, you need to stop making this about you.
Sorry.
See, this is the type of response that is a problem. TPM, you always makes comments like this, with some crazy assumption that if someone shows curiosity about a subject or has an opinion (or even asks for one), they are "worrying" or obsessing. You really need to let these things go. A poster offering his own experience while expressing an opinion really shouldn't upset you so much. relax. Breath. If you have a different opinion, express it without insults and vitriol. Others with the wisdom and experience you have seem to be able to express it in a way that actually helps posters rather than run new ones off. Then again, maybe that is your goal?
I am not here to make friends, I am here to help those that REALLY are confused and the way I see it, if you or someone else doesnt think I am nice enough, either block it out of get over it. This is me, I tell it like it is. And it has nothing to do with hiding behind a message board!
Man, you would have never made it here with TRhit around, may he rest in peace!
Bacdorslider, I put him through the mill, he put me through the mill, you guys have no clue, from his first bb player, to his last bb player, he has learned so much, I am actually pretty proud of him. He was a crazed dad who didn't understand why his first, who was an excellent pitcher, wasn't getting any love. Then he was just as crazy with the next, and the third had more interest in school than top D1 baseball and now his 4th, will more than likely go to Vandy or get drafted.
He is definitely right, you all think playing bb in the SEC, PAC12 or ACC is a joyride, in any sport? NO WAY.
I got mad at him a lot for driving me insane, I publicly apologize. I did all I could, even had DK get them all tickets when he was in Nashville AAA. I am not such a bad person.
Baseballmom's son's dad contacted me when his son was going to play on the Cape, same team son played on. He asked me a lot about the draft. I was very sad when baseballmom contacted me to tell me that he had passed away, at that time we became friends. We have a lot in common and that is what binds many of us here, once you have been down that road, regardless of where you end up, most of it all is about the same stuff.
This should have absolutely nothing to do with having a stud or not, because realistically many players don't come into their own until they are a few years out of puberty. That's why college is such a better option than draft. You all know about Strasburg right? I remember reading he was a "bit" overweight in HS and didn't get lots of interest from schools or proball.
So how the heck can you be posting about your 8th grader, and where he might be in 4, 7 years from now? Come on!!!!!
As I said, not here to make friends, though I have many and I have a special bond with a few that will last a lifetime. Last night I got a message from a poster thanking me for posting sons experiences, as they feel that they can learn from it, same as I stated what I did. He realizes its a long journey.
Anyway, I had oral surgery today so I thank you all for keeping me busy when I usually cant sit still for a second!
2020dad posted:Sorry Caco, I think we have a misunderstanding. I am not talking about playing varsity as a freshman. Just playing high school baseball in general. I have no idea if my son will play freshman, JV or varsity next year.
No misunderstanding. NO 9th grader plays varsity at my sons school. Not even the LHP that was throwing 80mph at the time.
Its not uncommon in my neck of the woods to have the talent to play D2 baseball or even D1 and not make your high school team. Last year my son spoke to a new coach, fresh out of Milb, who played D1 and was unable to make the HS team all 4 years. It happens, I just hope my son is eventually able to make it into the roster, but he may not, and that is when he will try the summer team showcase route to see if he can shake some trees that way :- )