Don’t bench the superintendent’s son

Makes me sick.  Assuming the story paints an accurate picture, this guy was doing everything right with the program on and off the ice, going way above and beyond in both regards.  Those guys are so hard to find.  Administration caves to petty BS from parents (including school personnel) unhappy their kiddo's aren't playing as much as they would like.  I have seen this play out far too many times.  There's always more to the story but geez, make it work.  It always seems to go from "...doing an amazing job"  to "..we're not going to renew your contract" with no efforts to actually sit down and resolve any issues.

I'd sure like to see the Sup's letter about his son and hear what the other players would have say about it.  And now his poor son will probably have to suffer the consequences with the teammates.  Not an easy situation since the Sup is, at least in many ways, the boss of the principal and AD. 

I had to sit in too many board meetings and watch players have to come and speak on behalf of coaches in very similar situations.   Meanwhile, those coaches are rewarded with a mental beatdown for their significant time and efforts to make things better for the kids and the school.  Some administrations are more supportive of their coaches than others.  

Four hockey players punished for walking across the street (off school grounds) during protest to talk to media ...

https://www.eagletribune.com/n...35-437d3a8b250a.html

Players vow not to play for new coach ...

https://boston.cbslocal.com/20...cipal-philip-conrad/

My view: The players will play for a new coach. Those who are left after the private and Catholic hockey programs vulture the ranked program and leave nothing but the bones. 

Cabbage, ask and you will receive. A well known blogger got a hold of one of six pages. For the record the superintendent refers to himself as a college athlete and former coach. He fenced. 

The problem with the superintendent, his son and the coach started with a disagreement on the son’s ability. The son and dad saw the kid as a blossoming D1 prospect. The high school coach didn’t think he was good enough to skate the third line. It was the coach’s fault the kid didn’t develop into a D1 prospect.

https://turtleboysports.com/he...d-lying-about-abuse/

The reference to “going full Braintree” is about Braintree girls basketball parents driving the best and most successful coach in the state to quit. She returned on her own negotiated terms. 

It's a shame that people like this are put in positions to make decisions. That letter tells me everything I need to know about the guy. A college fencer from four decades ago telling administrators the hockey coach does not know how to coach hockey. 

It's also a shame that every time a coach yells at or rides a player he's labeled abusive. It really needs to end. Whenever a story or scandal comes out about a coach I always look to see how the students and players react. If they stand behind him it almost always means the player is soft and can't take criticism. When there are crickets it was probably time for a change. Good on his players for getting behind him. Although I don't like the walkout of school. Stay in class, protest after. 

As we move forward with this type of culture I see one of two things happening. People eventually stop taking their claims seriously as they keep getting more outrageous and the pendulum swings back in the right direction. Or we move to a society of bubble wrapped people unable to accept any criticism without needing therapy. Something that goes way beyond sports, but has its roots here. 

If you walk out after school no one covers it. If you walk out during school, it's a story. I applaud the players. 

 bubble wrapped people

So true!

RJM posted:

Cabbage, ask and you will receive. A well known blogger got a hold of one of six pages. For the record the superintendent refers to himself as a college athlete and former coach. He fenced. 

The problem with the superintendent, his son and the coach started with a disagreement on the son’s ability. The son and dad saw the kid as a blossoming D1 prospect. The high school coach didn’t think he was good enough to skate the third line. It was the coach’s fault the kid didn’t develop into a D1 prospect.

https://turtleboysports.com/he...d-lying-about-abuse/

The reference to “going full Braintree” is about Braintree girls basketball parents driving the best and most successful coach in the state to quit. She returned on her own negotiated terms. 

Wow.  This is becoming quite a story.  Glad to see the kids and families rally and to see the press pick up on this.  Maybe if it goes viral, it will help send a message to school boards and administrations and move the meter just a little toward supporting their front line coaches.  Unfortunately, this is a very rare case where there is seemingly quite a bit of evidence and details become public.  Too many times, things are kept "confidential" and no one really knows the details and true story until it's too late.

Cabbage. You’ll love this one. The coach at 166-25, five section titles and two state championships got tired of harassment from parents and quit. This is the incident the blogger referred to as going “full Braintree on the coach.” Imagine a parent going after a coach because the kid wasn’t named  team MVP.

https://turtleboysports.com/he...-champion-to-resign/

Her former high school was thrilled to death to have a shot at hiring her. They stunk. These kinds of coaches build programs and win. She did return to the school she quit after discussions with the school district administrators on what coaches shouldn’t have to deal with. They’ve won the last two state titles. 

What this coach did wrong was quit in a Facebook post basically giving the situation an “FU, see ya.”

RJM posted:

Cabbage. You’ll love this one. The coach at 166-25, five section titles and two state championships got tired of harassment from parents and quit. This is the incident the blogger referred to as going “full Braintree on the coach.” Imagine a parent going after a coach because the kid wasn’t named  team MVP.

https://turtleboysports.com/he...-champion-to-resign/

Her former high school was thrilled to death to have a shot at hiring her. They stunk. These kinds of coaches build programs and win. She did return to the school she quit after discussions with the school district administrators on what coaches shouldn’t have to deal with. They’ve won the last two state titles. 

What this coach did wrong was quit in a Facebook post basically giving the situation an “FU, see ya.”

Wow, that's a lot.  I think this short quote by the dad about the things he would say to his daughter sorta sums up the whole problem we are dealing with today...

 "Not a day went by when I didn’t tell her to “just score and get what is yours.”  "

What's funny is I asked for it but then when I see these things actually published, after my initial reaction of "thank God someone finally put this out in the open", I cringe .  I guess I have mixed feelings.  On one hand, it's probably the only way to really make people aware of just how bad things have gotten.  On the other hand, you know it is probably causing a lot of turmoil for the young player and possible damage to the relationship with her parents.  That was always the tough thing to weigh in these matters... often difficult to find a solution that wouldn't potentially  damage family relationships, which I would never want to do no matter what a tool the parent/s might be.

I was always fortunate to always have a relatively very good group of parents.  Yet, every season, there was always just one or three of these that would really make you question if it's worth it.  I would write a book but I would have to move out of my community    

Yes Cabbage, there very well may be consequences regarding the relationship between the parent and the player... and there should be consequences.  After all, there have been consequences for the coach and the other players, it's only fitting that the problem parent faces consequences.  It's the only hope that this stuff will stop.

I've never coached at the HS level, but I've seen parents who act like this guy.  I've seen guys try to (and sometimes succeed at) manipulate youth coaches into playing their kids more, putting them at SS, batting them top of the order, etc when everyone knew that it was undeserved and other kids were getting screwed.  I've seen this as young as 10U travel ball.  The consequences to the young kid who gets pushed aside when this happens is disillusionment, lowered self-confidence, and sometimes giving up the game.  It's a terrible thing to do to a kid who is trying his best and hoping for a fair shake at playing the game.

I really hope more coaches "out" this kind of behavior, and I hope the people who vote for the school board in Andover see this and vote this bum out.

I hear ya Smitty but here's the rub...

My concern was always for the players, including the ones with the tool parent/s.  To be clear, I would never cave to the pressures of the parents.  I would be happy to address the parents directly, separately and at the appropriate time and did so on many occasions.  When they wouldn't get their way, they would cry to the AD, principal, school board if they hadn't already.  Sometimes this led to a meeting with multiple parties involved.  Those meetings were always kept confidential as required by the school and board - so the true story would never get out to the public - only the story the tool parent/s were telling.  So, when the tool parents left those meetings still unsatisfied and still un-enlightened, they would turn their venom against the coach/es even more so toward their kid, other parents, other kids, anyone who would listen.  Even in those circumstances, the last thing you want to do as a coach is cause divide between a child and mother/father.  At that point, I would choose to accept being the bad guy and never reveal the true dirt of the tool parent/s to the child or other players and parents.  Ya try to take the high road for the sake of the kid.  It can get wearing.

Over the last ten years, I think I outlasted six AD's and four principals.  This issue is the primary reason for that churn.  The AD's deal with this times twenty to forty sports teams (boys, girls, V, JV, etc.).  The principal has to be brought in the loop with any issues brought up by "concerned" parents.  As these mostly non-existent issues are brought up more and more, the board starts feeling pressure and flips it back on the principal and AD to keep the parents happy.  The AD and principal often have their hands tied as they are required to keep confidentiality.  The public RARELY hears of these issues being elevated until it is too late and the coaches either quit or are let go by worn out administration feeling the constant pressure of the small minority of parents making loud noise because their kid isn't getting his/hers.

But it's not the kid's fault.  And, throwing the parent/s under the public bus will likely only make things worse for the kid.  Our school has made great efforts to try to better educate the parents on having proper perspective with HS sports.  Unfortunately, this hasn't stemmed the tide of that louder and louder small minority.  We need to figure it out because the trend continues in the wrong direction in our society.

This story has a priceless ending. The fired coach was just hired to head coach one of the premiere powerhouse programs in the state. It’s a dream job. He’s replacing a new coach who had a horrible season.

You've heard of falling out of trees and landing on your feet? This is being tossed from the tree and landing on your feet scoring a perfect ten. His new program traditionally funnels players to D1 programs.

“Malden Catholic's hockey history, particularly over the last dozen years, has been rich. The Lancers won five Super 8 state titles and appeared in seven state finals in nine seasons.

The Lancers, though, struggled under new coach Mike Collett, finishing 1-20 this past winter, and 0-8 in the difficult Catholic Conference.”

https://www.eagletribune.com/s...8a-c72d172c74c2.html