Failure

Its a game puncuated by failure. There is talent in selective memory of a physical mistake. Failures are opportunities to improve.

Since we learn by our mistakes, how can you improve without failing.

Many people believe that you learn more from failure then success so no, Failure is not necessarily bad.

It's just not something that you should strive for................

It's not the failure itself, but how you view it. It's easy to support your child when he is succeeding. Learning the most productive way to support him when he fails is the lesson.

Nice post. Thanks, Fungo.

twoseamer

My son's greatest lessons have come from failure. It's what happens after the failure that counts.

Failure keeps him working on his game.

It can be an emotional thing to witness as parents though.

We all learn from our failures - it is how we grow. My son just had a huge failure in baseball - probably the only really negative experience he has ever had in the game. He was invited to a very successful NAIA program to "try out". He went and the schedule had gotten changed. Therefore, he didn't get to work out with the team, but had to pitch, hit, run, etc. in front of the coaches and the players as they started to arrive. First of all, he had taken the 3 weeks prior off and he was not in shape to do this. He couldn't run, couldn't pitch, he hit but not like he normally hits. He felt humiliated and like he had let everyone down. He has worked his butt off in the weeks since. He's normally an intense kid with workouts, etc., but I'll guarantee you, he'll be prepared to the max before he ever does something like that again. He hurt and I felt pain for him that day - but lesson learned.

Another good post by the wise one!

The way I see it, if you aren’t failing, you aren’t trying. How many people do we know who are afraid of stepping out for fear of failure?

Particularly in baseball. Making an out 7 out of 10 times and you might end up in the Hall of Fame!

Learning from your failures is what is paramount. How you react to your failures is a barometer of your future endeavors.

When my son gives up a dinger, he doesn’t hang his head and mope around, he shakes it off and bears down on the next hitter. I remember watching him last year give up a lead off triple. While calmly walking back to the mound after backing up the play he told the batter “nice hit”. The batter looked at him like he was nuts. He then proceeded to get the next three outs without giving up the run. If he hadn’t failed in the past and learned how to cope with it, he might not be where he is today.

Too lazy to look it up , but someone famous once said something like, “If you don’t learn from your mistakes, you’re bound to repeat them.” If nobody said it, they should have .

Great post Fungo.

Experience is an accumulation of all your failures. Stepping out of your comfort zone and taking the best challenege you can take will usually expose you to more failure. It's how you grow.

Your failures will teach you humility because as two seamer states, its easy to be a good sport when you're winning. How do you and your family handle failure??

And in baseball we know that on any given day...
the results may not be what we hope for.

Fungo - I really like your posts. Very thought-provoking.

Something that came across loud and clear to me over the past several years.

The really good ballplayers have the shortest memory in the universe. By that I mean, they do not dwell on the failures...but move on to the next day with confidence that it will be a better one. Sure, I believe they take away a little lesson from the failures. But they sure don't worry about them (like I would).

A lot of times, failure is just a point of view. My son is predominantly a leadoff hitter (except when he's failing a lot ). If he starts a game with an 11-pitch at bat, ending with a line out to right, has he failed...or has he succeeded in giving #'s 2,3 & 4 practically three at bats to observe the pitcher? If he starts off 0 for 3 at a wood bat tournament (which he is nervous about since we rarely played them)...then, after working hard in those at bats, goes on to 9 for 16...has he failed or were those just "tune-ups for the success? One of the most memorable at bats for me of my son was his final out fly ball in a huge championship game for us (losing 2-1 with the runner that ties it on first). It was the culmination of a 9 pitch at bat against what I consider one of the best pitchers in the South, who was throwing absolute lights out at the time. Though seen as a technical failure, I believe it to be one of the basic building blocks to success in realizing that, with proper focus, work ethic and mental fortitude(encouraged by myself and others around him)...he could "rake" with anybody.
I am a firm believer that success is what you make out of those small failures along the way that will be surpassed by future realizations.

A very good point.
Just like productive outs....moving runners over, etc. go in the book as an out but you've also done your job...setting up the next batter for success.
How you manage your emotions and your level of self control after a small failure are noticed. You can choose to make adversity your teacher rather than your enemy.

I like most parents really enjoy when my kids succeed, and really feel for them when they don't. I have to say that for the most part, luckily, they have succeeded far beyond my hopes...probably because their expectations were limitless...My son, RHP05, has amazed me at times with his talent. So when a college coach came out this summer to watch him pitch, I hoped that he would show the coach what I had seen many times. Well things did not go well and my son was very disappointed and figured that he would not hear from the coach again...but a few weeks later the coach was out to see him pitch again...and wouldn't you know, he did not pitch his best again. Strike two. The coach continued to call, he told me that he knew what my son could do, what he wanted to see was how my son reacted when things were not going well. My son just signed his letter of intent to play for this coach in college.

Great thread fungo. You always stimulate the conversation. I don't know if you would call them failures, but I think baseball is a game of failures mixed in. If the object is to get a hit while batting, then a great player will fail 7 out of 10 times, and still hit .300. And pitching we know that pitchers don't get everyone out, so has he failed during those times? Hmmm, don't know. I do know that baseball is a great game, one not tied to a shot or play clock. Yes, my son has made alot of "mistakes", but I wouldn't call them failures.

I read an excellent book called "The Mental Edge" about the mental aspects of preparing mind and body for success ... it's about sports but could apply to any part of your life.

About failure ... one thing stated in this book as an important aspect of achieving success is to aim for worthwhile, challenging goals. Failure is viewed simply as a natural component of preparing and striving to succeed at lofty goals, i.e., truly successful people understand how to turn failure into a positive component of fine tuning and adjusting their paths to their goals ... they simply don't view it as a deterent. Once failure is viewed in this way, you no longer need to fear it.

When you look at very successful people, whether they are atheletes, business people, whatever ... a common thread is that they set lofty goals for themselves and they are not afraid to fail. They simply keep trying and adjusting their methods through what they learn from failure until they succeed.

Sorry for the basketball reference, but "you'll always miss 100% of the three-point shots you never take".

I recall Reggie Jackson discussing the amount of times he struck out--his answer was very simple --- he felt he was actually helping the team by striking out with men on base because he kept them out of the double play-- in his eyes striking out with men on base was not true failure but more of a plus

CTRHP05MOM,
Great story! Congratulations to your son. I see this is your first post. Welcome to the High School Baseball Web...keep your comments coming and keep us updated on your son.
Fungo

Fungo:

My old coach used to say that failure builds character! It's what you do after you've been knocked to your knees that defines your character and makeup. Will you quit or get up off your knees, try harder and learn from your mistakes? I passed it on to my two boys and they are both characters!

Another of his old sayings was surround yourself with "Good People" and good things will happen! This keeps any bad influence from rubbing off.

Kind of like the guys on the Tennessee Forum. Great guys who always seem to know the right thing to do in any situation and a great place to hang out!

I believe in both of these saying 100% and think they are true with anything you tackle in life including baseball.

Fungo,
Winning, losing, failure, success, competition, sport, and games are all opportunities to grow and deepen our character.

TennDad,
The Tennessee forum is an opportunity to.... well ya just have to know us to understand.

Great post. I read an article years ago where a sportswriter interviewed Sparky Anderson about this very subject. At the time, the Orioles were known for having one of the best farm systems around, and the writer wanted to know how Sparky could tell how, with all the incredible young talent he saw every day, who would 'make it' and who wouldn't. His reply was that it was easy - he would watch how they handled a mistake. The ones that had the best chance of making it would take a moment to analyze what they did wrong and move on. The ones that would typically wash out, would agonize over each error and in the process, make even more. A great lesson that I have never forgotten.

I’m going to take a wild guess and say that we all have at least one thing in common – our son’s are tougher on themselves more then anyone else is – they know the game and the nuances and when a mistake is made they are hard on themselves.

Games are not won or lost on a single pitch or play.

All that said, I have seen my son be incredibly humble about the “game winning” hit, strike out or play. On the other hand, I have seen him almost kick himself for a bases loaded deep hit to center that was caught for the final out.

I always joke with my son that baseball is a cruel game – well thrown fastball low and away gets dinked for a single. A well hit line drive where the fielder doesn’t even move for the catch. Doesn’t seem fair.

Great post Fungo – my son has grown and so have I.

FrankF,

quote:

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I remember watching him last year give up a lead off triple. While calmly walking back to the mound after backing up the play he told the batter “nice hit”. The batter looked at him like he was nuts.

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I especially liked this part of your post because I think some of us forget that it is still a "game".

And CNTRHP05MOM,

quote:

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The coach continued to call, he told me that he knew what my son could do, what he wanted to see was how my son reacted when things were not going well. My son just signed his letter of intent to play for this coach in college.

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A very important factor for parents and players just beginning the recruiting/scouting process to recognize.................

Scouts/Recruiters observe a lot by watching.........a lot.

I always knew who my better players were when I saw them fail. How did they react. There is nothing wrong with falling down. Failure is not getting up.