Got THE call

quote:

Originally posted by HeyBatter:
Well, just got the call today. Upon preparing to return for his sophomore college year, my son has decided to hang 'em up. Can't explain it, but the old "feeling" just isn't there anymore for him.

I can't thank him enough for all the good times and all the memories.

That must hurt you some. Was your son a very good ballplayer?

Sorry to hear that HeyBatter, but as we all know everyone hangs them up someday.

All the more reason we all need to enjoy it while we can.

Thanks for sharing, all will be fine...even for Mom and Dad with alittle time.

Heybatter,

We will ALL get that call at some point with our boys and their baseball. All I can say is I hope I handle it with the same calm and sensibility that you seem to possess. Congrats to your son for making it to the collegiate playing field...and congrats to you for being such a supportive dad! Thanks for giving us a reminder to enjoy each and every minute.

HeyBatter:

I'm sorry to hear about your son's decision...I admire you for starting this thread...it could not have been easy.

As usual, on this site, you are receiving good advice...luvbb has said it much better than I could have and I agree with her completely.

This is a situation that occurs often...but probably isn't discussed much...again, thanks for sharing.

At some point do you think your son would read this thread and respond with his thoughts? There was a thread similar to this one last summer or early fall.

There was alot of discussion concerning burnout...and there was certainly no consensus regarding the topic.

I found the topic to be quite interesting.

Please keep us posted HeyBatter.

I wish my son would go fishing with me. He doesn't because he devotes most of his time to baseball. I think back of the many good times we had fishing together when he was younger. We also spent a lot of time together chasing his dream of baseball. While both are great activities for bringing parents and sons together, we both know baseballs and boats are not necessary for happiness.
Fungo

HeyBatter:

I'm sorry to hear about your son's decision...I admire you for sharing this...it could not have been easy. It may help to sit back and just respect his decision. My son quit summer ball last year after the first two weeks and took a job at Best Buy in town here. My wife and I were besides ourselves at his decision to throw this opportunity away!!! He had a good summer with his friends then three weeks before school started dusted off his equipment and started back up. School started and he feels he needed the time off as it was just too demanding with school, practice, friends, community work, training, on and on... Now he is back 24/7 Hang in there he may just need a break.
Steve

Fungo you've reminded me of something. I don't know how many times I've said it... even on here... THERE ARE MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THINGS THAN BASEBALL! The most important of those things is HAPPINESS.

HeyBatter,

I sincerely hope your son ends up with much happiness and many fond memories about baseball. Some day he might have a son and that's when he will most appreciate good old Dad, more than ever.

Hope you don't hang it up here because you can help many people by sticking around. You are now part of the majority! Everyone will be joining you at some point.

Congratulation to you and your son for having all those good times and memories. Sounds like a big success to me!

Hey Batter,

I am going to speak from the heart. I will be devastated when I get that call, but understand the "life goes on philosophy" as I am sure you do. Right now it hurts however. For what its worth, I feel bad for you but if I were to get the call today - I would be thinking about all those memories with some sorrow yet with a smile in my heart as well

I also love the idea of thanking him for the memories. These are treasures - provided by your son - that only baseball parents can enjoy.

When he was 91 years old, the great Bob Hope returned to Cleveland to sing the classic "Thanks for the Memories" when they closed old Cleveland Stadium. It is times like these that remind of that song.

Thanks to you all for your kind words and thoughts. I thought this site was the greatest when I first stumbled upon it many years ago when my son was just starting high school. I always found just amazing advice when I came here and it helped me help my son follow his dream to play college ball and he reached that dream.

Whether he'll have a change of heart or this really is it, well the end comes some day in every endeavor. Sooooooo much positive has come from his baseball experience and before it were take a negative turn, if that is where his heart was headin, it is best to put on the brakes here and with nothing but great memories.

I have to admit to being quite sad and a bit surprised by the timing, but he's a great kid and I trust his judgment and he feels he needs to do this and I am so very happy for him for the career he has had and the point he reached in baseball and where his baseball talents helped him go (travel teams, club teams, high school playoffs, showcases, all league etc. etc.-so many wonderful people we've met and admittance to a wonderful college).

As someone posted above, my hope is that you'll all enjoy every moment you get and as someone else pointed out, we all get this call someday, at some point.

It is a sad day, but hopefully a great beginning and new adventures and I sure plan to stick around here. Heck, we still love baseball and I hope I can share a thought or information here so others can have the same amazing experience we've had.

From t-ball, through little league, travel teams, scout teams, winter ball, summer ball, high school, the recruiting process and to college, wow, what a ride.
I wouldn't trade anything for the memory I'll always have of his first college at bat, a double off the centerfield fence. But hey, still a long way in life to go and hoping for lots of good stuff still ahead.

thanks again for all your good thoughts and best wishes and happy new year (and you'll still have me to kick around here )

Thank you HeyBatter for the thread and the reminder to always enjoy the moment. I wish you & your son the very best.

Hey Batter:

It's a tough call for your son to make, baseball has been a major part of his life for so long. But I'm sure you are proud of the fact he was able to recognize that he wanted to do something else it takes a man to look into himself and know what he wants.

I am sure I speak for you as well as others on this site, we love our sons and baseball is part of their lives not life itself. Our sons are more important to us as our sons rather than ball players. Good luck.

HeyBatter...your post reminded me.....that if it were to end tomorrow.....we have had a wonderful time....

Best wishes to you and your son....

HeyBatter,

When I found this site, you were one of the first posters to welcome me (doubt you even remember that). I think we also probably sat at the same ballpark in Palo Alto a couple of summers ago...not knowing each other was there. Kind of weird how I've never met you...but always felt a kind of warmth from your posts.

So since we kind of grew up together on this site...your wonderful and open post hits a little deeper with me than previous others reaching the same point. I know it must be a bit tough today...probably was even tougher for your son to call you. But you, as always, have things in a very good perspective. I really admire that. And I know your son has and will continue to benefit greatly from your mentorship and the role model you are.

Thank you for welcoming me to this site...and thank you for being so open at this time. I hope you continue to post...and I hope next time we're in the same ballpark, we somehow run into each other.

All the best!

He went out on his own terms. I don't know if that's as bad as still wanting to play and everyone else telling you you're done

Heybatter,

Thank you for your honesty all these years. I wish the best for your son and hope you stick around this place.

I am sure your son will take the many great lessons he learned through baseball and apply them in his new endeavors successfully.

HeyBatter,

ya raise 'em up to think on their own, then when they do ya wonder "what are they thinking"?


seriously tho, I (and others) should remember your additude when our call comes -

Thanks


btw, your HSweb membership is a lifetime one
.

heybatter -

Others have said it much more eloquently than I, but thanks from me for your continued insights during a tough time. You are a classy guy. How is your son doing?

HeyBatter,

Once I get past the surprize and sadness associated with your son's decision, I'm taken straight to the opportunities it presents for him. This came to me like a "ton of bricks" last year when a long-time playing partner of my son's (back to the 8th grade) came to the same conclusion and left UNC's team to concentrate more on college and his future beyond it.

As I sat there and thought about the young man at the time, I found myself increasingly excited for him. He's smart, personable, and...through baseball...shown that he has the energy and fortitude to succeed. What he'd come to realize was that, if he could re-direct the energy that he'd been applying to baseball toward other pursuits, he'd greatly enhance his opportunity to succeed past baseball. Meanwhile, he'll always love and appreciate baseball; only in a different way.

So, I find myself similarly excited for your son and his prospects. "Hats off to him" for for coming to what had to have been a tough decision, and all the best to him...and you...in the future!

Hey Batter, I too, appreciate your sharing your and son's story with us. I will remember to soak in every minute I can this spring when I think of your post.

However, like has been said - may he make the most out of his decision and the other opportunities that are in his future. Best of luck to him!

Thank you for sharing your story. It puts into perspective that our boys baseball "careers" can end at any time for any reason. Makes every moment they play all that much appreciated.

Best of luck to him!

HeyBatter...I, too, got that dreaded call from my older son playing in the Mets minor league system years ago. Not that he quit, but rather that he was released.

Would like to hear some stories of recently drafted players getting released after their first season. Any out there?

I would suppose that it is better that your son was able to make his own decision rather than a coach or a general manager making it for him.

When I was called into the General Manager's office years ago, it wasn't pretty.

My younger sophomore son, hopes to get a chance to play at the next level, but if he doesn't, he knows that he'll be working on his MBA at Wharton, Harvard or Stanford; and, then, making six figures out of school instead of $1000.00 a month for 3 months buried in some short season league; and, working at the White Hen or 7-11 or Wal-Mart in the off season.

Many, many, many, many are called.

Few are chosen.

Still fewer play in The Show.

Hey Batter
Thank you for the wake-up call...you have touched many parents in different ways with your comments.
For me, I can be a bit too overboard with "constructive criticism" of my two sons in sports. Last night, I sat them both down and told them how very proud I was and how much happiness they bring me with their athletic and other efforts (even though I don't show it well at times). I caught my 15 yr old by surprise...I could tell it meant alot to him for me to say that. Thanks Hey Batter!!!

.

Heybatter...Thanks for sharing...It has brought up some excellent postings...and in our case some thoughts are are central to our experience ...

We in sport must ask ourselves on a daily basis....

Is sport fostering an increasingly strong and bond between son and family?

Is sport improving our comunication process?

Are we using sport...of course the wins and the successes and achievements but more importantly the losses and the struggles...to teach life lessons? (putting down the glove is simply one more in a long series of life lessons...)

Will ours sons be better people, not just better ballplayers for having had this experience?

Are WE as parents better people because of this experience?

And finally....If it all ended tommrow at this level, would it have been worth every minute?

Based upon your posts that you can answer a resounding yes to all....All the best to your family!



.



It has always been about the journey not the result.

HeyBatter:

Like many others have said - thank you so much for sharing the story. It is a great reminder for all of us that sooner or later this day will come for all of us parents and our sons. I am sure that this decision was not an easy one for your son nor was that call an easy one to make. My thoughts will be with both you and your son today.

Very depressing topic.

I told my son if I died tommorrow I would be a happy man but if he quites baseball before I die then he is the DEAD MAN !

I am grieving for you Batter !

There is always co ed beer ball.

Thanks for sharing, Heybatter. We're all going to get this call one day, and your post has caused me to reflect on what it's going to be like. Not only will I hear from my son that he's finished some day; but also from many other boys I've coached, some for over 5 years and whom I care deeply about.

For some of those boys, I expect that I'll be very happy as they're moving on to the next phase of their lives. For a few, I know I'll be sad or disappointed as they have tremendous talent that many others so desperately wish they possessed, and it'll eventually end for all of them.

Cherish all the good things that baseball has brought your son, and family. Those are experiences and memories that you are so fortunate to have and will remember forever. I hope your son is doing well with this decision, and feels energized going forward with new passions to pursue. Best of luck to both of you.

Fungo, your comment about wishing you had more time with your son for fishing reminds me of how lucky I am with my own. He loves to fish and it is one of the special things we enjoy together when off the diamond. He loves baseball and, hopefully, will play longer than a few more years. When the time comes that he no longer plays, I imagine we'll spend even more time drifting down some great western rivers together. If you're ever visiting our part of California, you're always welcomed in our boat.

HeyBatter,

As others have said, thanks for sharing the news with us. I also have enjoyed your posts, and hope you will continue to be part of the "family" here.

Just wanted to poke my nose in here again and to first thank you all once more.

Spoke with my son again last night and got a little more insight into his decision. Basically, this was nothing negative about baseball, but more to the positive about other things in life. He is blessed to have a great deal of other talents other than baseball but he's always chosen to place them in the "back seat" in favor of the diamond. After a year and a half of college though, I guess he just couldn't keep the door barred on all these other things.

Increasingly, he told me he's found that he couldn't take certain classes, had to forgo a number of other opportunities for internships and other things and was becoming increasingly concerned about where the future would lead with baseball focused so much for him.

He says he still loves the game (even has time still booked at a local batting cage). Today he's working out with a friend who's a former major league player. Basically, he's not writing off baseball, but at this point the rigors and demands of college baseball and his desire to not put forth anything but his best effort are in conflict with his desire to attend to so many other things that college presents.

In the past and truly by his choice he has devoted his time to baseball over other alternatives, as have we all and our sons. In the course of high school, among many things, he missed his prom to attend a tournament. He's never gone on a traditional spring break trip, instead always choosing to play ball. He's never participated in certain activities such as skiing for fear of injury and left football after developing tendinitis and fearing it would interfere with the baseball season. He's a fairly talented guitarist, but bp always came before music lessons.

I think the turning point was this Thanksgiving when he was in a major car accident. Every worse case scenario was possible in that wreck and he was blessed to walk away without a single scratch. But, I think it got him started thinking about all the things he wanted to do in life in addition to baseball. Unfortunately, I guess that as you reach higher levels of a sport and the demands it presents, you start dealing with "instead of" not in addition to. As he was approaching the half way mark of college he just started seeing that there were so many "instead ofs" that had passed him by and he just wanted to expand his experiences and horizons before college was in the rear view mirror (man it goes fast).

I've always felt one of the worst things in life is to have regret. He assures me that he has no regret in "curtailing" baseball at this point and no regret for everything he has put into it up to now. He said he would regret though missing out on other opportunities that are now present as college life unfolds.

What struck me the most was what he did NOT say. No complaints about his coach or teammates. No complaints about his team's success or lack of it. No complaints about playing time issues, etc. etc. No complaints about baseball at all, just the desire to add other things to his life experience and with some room still somewhere for the game he loves.
I really like this kid

After having a day to reflect, I can only reiterate that so much good has come from our involvement in baseball and with all that, I think so many good things lie ahead. More baseball will certainly be one of those good things, if only as fans and no longer as participants if that remains the case.

Take care and here's hoping everyone has a GREAT season.

HeyBatter!! Thanks.

Your sharing of this very personal family event with the "extended hsbaseballweb family" has caused so many of us to take time to reflect on baseball, it's endings and the really important lessons that we all can gain from this game.

Best of wishes for your son in the path that his life takes him,.... I feel he will do well.

Thanks again.

OPP

HeyBatter - it is hard to argue with that logic. Brings a tear to my eye to read that but it is a very positive story. All the best to your son. He indeed is a fine young man.

ClevelandDad summed it up perfectly.

Much success to you, your son, and your family.

As others have urged...don't be a stranger...leave all that strange stuff to me!

Sincerely hope to keep hearing from you Heybatter.

HeyBatter

So thoughtful of you to share your story with us. It is very hard to watch your son end one phase of his life and begin a new one.

It happens several times throughout thier lives. The first day they set off for school. Years later when they gradauate hs.

It also happens anytime they take one fork in the road over another.

But in each new phase of their lives we find a way to be thankful for what was, what is, and what we can hope will be.

Good luck to your son on the path he has chosen.

Thanks for sharing the second part of your story. Your son's comments give us all plenty to ponder.

One thing I see pretty clearly is that you and your wife are very fortunate to have such a mature and well rounded son. Sounds like he really has his act together. Congratulations.

.

Heybatter...

My '06 had one of those accidents...

Sober but stupid friend driving..45 minutes to cut mine out of the wreck..deemed life threatened with broken femurs,head and internal injuries...airlifted to the city...and somehow walks away a day later limpimg and sore but intact...

In my book yours is being saved for a special purpose...

.

I think the reason we love baseball so much is because we share it with our sons, When baseball is over we will find some thing new that we will share with them and love it too... Its all about our sons.

Hey friend...I sent you a private message. All the best to you and that wonderful boy of yours.

HeyBatter - As has been said, congrats on raising such a mature and focused young man. I know 40 year olds that don't know which direction they should go in life or what's important in their hearts. As njbb says "it's all about the sons" and you all have obviously raised a smart one!

HeyBatter- Life moves on as you well know. I hurt for you because I am sure that you enjoyed watching your son play and following him in his endeavors on the field. But what is more important than baseball is that you have a relationship with your son outside of baseball. Baseball will end someday for everyone. But the relationship that you build with your son will last you a lifetime. You know what, now you can spend some time building other common interest like fishing, hunting, going to games, and hopefully in the future coaching the grandchildren together. Like PG said there are more important things than baseball. One of them is life. Good luck to you and your son and I think you have shown alot of class by bringing this up here for everyone to talk about.

Hey Batter:

There is not much left to say after what has previously been posted, except the obvious: You've got a great son and you are smart enough to understand that, appreciate that and trust that. Best of luck, and I hope to see you around here years into the future.

njbb-very well said

What else is there to say except best wishes and prayers for your son and his future endeavors.

Heybatter ...

Have been silent as this thread has grown ... and have enjoyed the wonderful posts about your son. Seems as tho God has given him some wonderfully mature insight for a young man and that he knows he has been blessed in many ways, not the least of which has been his baseball life.

Hope this doesn't mean you will be silent here, tho, as I too have enjoyed your posts and feel that you have a lot to contribute.

Best wishes for a wonderfully blessed future for your son and your family.

Heybatter,

You have an incredible son!! I think this thread has to immediately go GOLDEN !

Catchersdad

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

------Robert Frost
The Road Not Taken

Frost....my favorite poem.....thanks PAmom....think from all the postings...we are all acknowledging that our sons will stop playing some day.....we will all get that call....Can only hope we go about it with as much understanding, love and appreciation for each other....and what is really important in this life... as HeyBatter and his son have shown.....

HeyBatter, was watching one of my all time favorites, Field of Dreams, when I read your posts.
Dr. "Moonlight" Graham, talking about his short career, put things in a very nice perspective. In response to a comment that "it was a shame" how his baseball career was limited, "Doc" ,talks about "what would have been a shame" was if his being a doctor of medicine was limited to 5 minutes.
Sounds like your son has had a wonderful and rewarding baseball experience. Sounds also like he may well have a future as enriching and fulfilling as Dr. Graham and realizes what a "shame" it might be if he does not experience that life to its fullest. Think he deserves a huge round of and wish you and he all the very, very best.

HeyBatter:

My heart goes out to you, and my hat is off to you. We've tried hard in my family to help our children understand the importance of not moving away from something, but rather moving forward to something. It may simply be the other side of the same coin, but in a nutshell... Set your goals, set your strategy, proceed, revisit, alter as necessary, procede. But always forward. ...always positive.

It sounds like your son has a great handle on that. It sounds like you've taught him well. All the best to him, and to you, for future memories together.

FloridaHokie:

quote:

...always forward. ...always positive.

Absolutely agree! Nice post.

Theres nothing that i can say hear that hasnt already been said excpet for, not only is this thread been a wake up call for parents to take nothing for granted because someday their child will "hang 'em up" but I would also like to add that it is a wake up call for each and every ballplayer out there. Someday it will end and for me being a junior in highschool it seems like my baseball career will go on till im 90 years old because, heck I'm a teenager I'm invincible and i will always play baseball" This thread just planted a seed in my head that, for every game I play is one game closer to my last.....HeyBatter I'm sorry to hear about your son, but i would also like to thank you for personally teaching me the importance of playing hard every game. So thank you and good luck with whatever your family and son decides to do.

BD2579:

You've got a good head on your shoulders...I'm not going to worry about you...keep up the good posts kid.

Hey Batter,

When I made that same call to my folks, they were very disappointed. My own son took his last swing in HS last year - I knew it, and I was a bit sad, but also thoughtful about his liberation from the sports yoke.

Your son has decided to be LIBERATED. and that is a good thing. Celebrate for him, if you can.

My mother recently had a serious heart disease issue. After several decades, she finally said "Thanks for the memories, not baseball, just you, your wife and my grandchildren." She finally got it. Perhaps that is why I have gotten it, ahead of time, with my own son.

we are going through this same thing with our son who is a Senior in highschool. he went to a Shocase camp in Nov. and then decided that he did not not want to play after highschool. He does still want to play summer ball though. but we did tell him it makes no sense to play for the same team as last year if he has no desire to go farther. the cost and travel will not be worth. All of the other boys are playing college ball. He did agree. We hope that he has a GREAT highschool and change his mind but we doubt it.

We are looking forward to see what he fills his time with and what direction he decides to go. It is scary and depressing that this time is over for him. But we have to realize that he needs to make the decision that is right for him. His summer coach understood be cause he did the same thing as your son. He was in his sophmore year I believe also and decided he just didn't want it anymore. He loves the game still but would rather coach.

It has been a touchy situation for us a littel though. be cause our son did tell someone else that he thought we were pressuring him to do college ball. whaich I don't think we ever were. But we did want to know if he still wanted to play his senior year this year. He did say he does. I told him to be sure he is doing it because HE WANTS TO. He assured me he is. The last thing we ever want is for our boys to feel is pressure to do anything.

I commend you for the way that you are handling this situation and I know what you are going through and how hard it can be. And I loved your comment."I can't thank him enough for all the good times and all the memories". I will share that with my son also. So thank you for posting this when I didn't have the courage.

I think it can often be a difficult thing to truly see something through someone else's eyes. We don't have the same experiences, dreams, or expectations.

My now college son, was sharing some very deep feelings with me last summer when his HS career ended. He was tearful over several things including telling me how he felt so bad for the guys that weren't going on to play college ball and that he would "do anything to keep being a part of this game". I understood and respected his feelings and concern about his teammates. However, I pointed out to him that all of his teammates didn't have that same desire to play college ball. Some of them were completely satisfied with going on to college and pursuing other dreams in their lives. It can be difficult for us to understand when we enjoy something so much and want it to continue to be a part of "our" lives how someone else feels differently.

Hey Batter,
Your post about you son had an impact on myself as well. Over the past 2 years I have been working hard to become a Major League Baseball player and becauce of that I have also missed out on a few things. Now I don't regret doing that though because I REALLY want to become a big league ballplayer. But, your post made me realize something, I need to start enjoying every baseball game I play even more than I already do. I am only 15 and I don't want it to become a job just yet.(it isn't, BTW) You never know when it might end due to, injury, better opportunities, etc. Thank you for sharing that with us, it brought a tear to my eye also and it made me rethink the way I am treating my games. That is exactly what it is, A GAME. Thank you and I wish the best of luck for you and your son.

-Kevin

Pamom: - My favorite poem - thank you for posting it.

Whichever path your son takes, if he is happy and healthy, it just gets better and better. Treasure each day that you share your lives.

Sue54:

Thanks for finding the courage and posting your story...there are some good lessons in your story for all of us.

I have never thought about the call until this post....

Don't know why, maybe I love this roller coaster of emotions in the ever shrinking baseball world.

HB: Thanks for the post, but it seems that you have nothing to fear...Your t-baller has become a man. That's what all of us want in the end.

Bullwinkle

HeyBatter---

My real post on your touching thread is in AParent's thread, Where have all the young men gone, in the General Forum. Our situations are (WERE, for me) so similar I could only muster my mantra for the past three years, The Road Not Taken. Your post took my breath away.

YOU already have a have a handle on the situation. You will be FINE, as your son is already. Life goes on without baseball...it simply veers down another path...

Since my "real" post belongs here, I will reproduce it below:

--------------------------------
Three years ago nearly to the DAY, my son returned to campus after Christmas break his sophomore year, walked into his coach's office, and after agonizing over his decision for MONTHS, exited a baseball program that had brought him more grief than fun---grief that none of us saw coming (YES, TR, we did our homework!). He thought about transferring, but since his choice of schools was based on academics FIRST, he decided to stay---without baseball for the first time in his (and Mom's and Dad's) life.

I don't care to rehash the circumstances again (still an open wound for me three years out), but many of you real old timers on this incredible website literally saved me from losing my mind at the time. I have been FOREVER grateful to my friends here for reaching out in my time of quiet (OK---not so quiet!) desperation. I DID have to step away for awhile to catch my bearings again, but I just couldn't leave for good, despite the occasional twinges of nostalgic pain. I haven't been able to post in HeyBatter's thread (except for the Robert Frost poem, The Road Not Taken), "Got the CALL"---about his son's decision to hang up the cleats, because I have a lot of trouble reliving that period of time in our lives---but I SO know what he is going through. And it is absolutely TRUE that we parents take "the end" so much harder than our sons do.

Mike (my son) didn't skip a beat and moved on to other interests and talents. He played baseball in a local semi-pro league for a couple of years when home those summers for his baseball fix. On campus he turned to passion #2, which is theater and the creative arts. He graduated from John Carroll University in suburban Cleveland last May with a BA in Communications (theater, writing, broadcasting emphasis) and a minor in English---and not the MVP baseball trophy he'd maybe envisioned at the start, but the university's equivalent of "Best Actor" award after starring in many campus productions. He remained in Cleveland after graduation, working part-time while half-heartedly hunting for a "real" job (writing, advertising, marketing)---but really was a practicing starving-artist-in-training.

Just last weekend, Mike moved back home to PA for the short term (with our "permission" and full support) after making the gutsy career decision to "go for it while the window of opportunity is open"---the one he didn't allow himself to make with baseball. Eventually, he will enroll in an acting school or studio in either Chicago or New York (he is researching both), and give it a shot. No rose-colored glasses...no grand illusions of fame...just pursuing a challenge and a dream and a love...with NO REGRETS.

Baseball lives forever in our heart space, but I am here to tell you that there IS life after baseball, and that "way (DOES) lead on to way," and that sometimes "the road less traveled" is the one that can "make all the difference."

As Ever,
PAmom

This is a great thread, one that ALL baseball parents should read. Heybatter, your son is the real "prospect"...no guessing, he's got what it takes to succeed...on his terms.

We, too, received the call last week. It was hard at first, but priorities change, life interests change, individuals change. Hurricane Katrina hastened things, though, with a lost freshman fall semester in New Orleans and all that would have entailed in terms of baseball. But, my wife and I really are not sorry, our son made up his mind, made his choice, and was upfront with Doc Beeman, with no hard feelings either way. I'm proud he had the courage to do what he wants to do, and look forward to some "normal" summers with him at home.

What a long, strange trip it's been...

Taratko,

Good luck to your son in all his endeavors.

As my mother alway's said "everything happens for the best". Normal summers are a good thing.

TaRatko,

I am sure that whatever Zak decides to do he will be successful. Our family wishes all of you the best. The best part of the journey is the journey and the memories it creates. Those are there forever.

JMEpop

Tar, best of luck to Zak. You're right about the courage. It takes plenty to stop doing something you love and have done for a long time to pursue a different goal.
Watching them play is fun but nothing beats the quality 1 on 1 time with the family only.

Wow. Nothing like a REAL reality check to understand what life really is...and how fragile it is.

It's wonderful that he was able to make the decision on his own terms..My son, a college freshman, hurt his ankle in September and we thought for a while that his career was over. Fortunately it is not, but it did put things in perspective.

My favorite "tag line" is "Play each game is if it were your last. One day it will be." . . . . Because you just never know.

Our best to your son and to your family...As Bob Seger sings..."turn the page."

TARatko,

Best of luck to your son in his future endeavors!

Taratko - Wishing your son all the best in his future life choices! Enjoy those new summer options!

Taratko....best wishes to your son, it must have been a very difficult decision for him......your support is wonderful.....

Tom

We did move decided we weren't close enough to the ocean and the worst part of the hurricanes, now we live on the intercoastal. A lot worse when the wind blows but way better the rest of the time. So far so good for Joe, hoping for a good season.

Keep posting, old timers make this place feel like home.

TARatko:

Thanks for sharing your story...that's what this thread is for.

Enjoy your time together pursuing what is now important. It is reassuring to know that your son's decision was primarily his own with a little urging from Mother Nature ...she puts us in our place.

quote:

What a long, strange trip it's been...

Indeed...and keep on truckin'

TARatko, as I've mentioned to you before, your son's rise to recruitability was a remarkable achievement, and serves as an inspiration to others on that same path.
Enjoy your summers!!!

TAratko,

Best of luck to your son. He is a great kid with a great Dad. I know how much you put into helping him. I hope he realizes how much his dad loves him. Also hope that baseball has taught him some valuable things that will help him later.

I'll say it again (umpteenth time)... There are many more important things than baseball! Now if I could just practice what I preach!

TAR.....

I'm much surprised, and sad, to hear about Zak!!!! I'm sure there is some 'hurting' going on, but those are some of the choices we have to make. I almost dread the day that it comes our way. I love to watch Andy play!!!!

Andy and me want to wish Zak the very, very best in what every he chooses to do. I think about you guys quite often.

We need to get together again, soon, when you have time.

Your friend, Boomer

Thank you so much! Not once did you ever bore me. I held a lot of respect for your desire to help your son and other kids. I'm glad he will have some good memories of those days. Maybe he might get the itch again to put the cleats on. There's always summer ball if he desires to stay active.

I would accept any info you would ever care to pass our way. You may have worked hard giving Zak every opportunity, but at the same time I remember all the other kids you would promote. Whether Zak ever plays again or not, I hope you stay involved. Baseball needs more people like you.

Give me a call whenever you feel like it. Tell Zak the same, we won't forget him!

TARatko,

Thank you for the help and advice you gave to this dad who didn't know which end was up when it came to showcases, summer travel ball and where the good restaurants in Ft. Myers are. My best wishes to Zak and to your entire family. Thank you for sharing your story.

Regards, Bruce.

I am 15 years old and a sophomore in high school. Throughout all the stress and struggles that go with high school life (baseball, schoolwork, girls, etc.)... I have never felt the need to do something for my parents or to impress somebody. My parents have told me since the day I could pick up a baseball and sound out the alphabet that no matter what I did they would always love me more than anything in the world.
Personally, I appreciate these stories very much because it shows the true meaning of parental guidance and love. It takes an incredible amount of calm and respect on both the parent's part (and loads of maturity on the kid's part to realize such things) to be able to grasp this as a positive and move on. Thank you for sharing your stories, it helps make a more optimistic and peaceful outlook on life

~Josh

JH:

You are a winner JH. You have a great attitude and a wonderful outlook...pat your folks on the back for me...they've done an excellent job so far in bringing you up.

gotwood:

thanks. now if you could just tell them that stuff about me maybe i can stay out a little later on weekends . lol just kidding. thanks and ill pass the message on to them.

I just came across this post and felt compelled to share our story.

My son, an '06 C/1b, told me he was calling it quits last fall after his dad committed suicide. At that time he was being recruited by quite a few schools. Of coarse I was devastated by his sudden choice to stop playing the sport he had devoted so much time and energy to just when he would have been able to bear the fruits of all his hard work. His dream had always been to play baseball at the college level.

While I was concerned with his timing in making this decision, I was supportive all the same. A few of the college coaches contacted me and told me that because of the circumstances surrounding his decision to quit, they would hold a spot for him if he decided he wanted to play again at any time down the road.

I still have a copy of the letter I sent to him, which brings tears to my eyes even now.
I thanked him for all the wonderful memories over the years. From his years playing Little League and Pony baseball to his final high school years playing with ABD.

He was the starting catcher on his HS varsity team as a freshman and they won the CIF championship his sophomore year. He was named to the 1st team ALL CIF that year, which was quite an accomplishment since he was only a sophomore. He was an All League award winner all 3 years he played.
He was also the kid who got the coaches award every year except for one, from his t-ball days through his high school career.

We have terrific memories from all the PG events including the Perfect Game National Showcase he was invited to attend at Turner Field last year.
He still wears the clay stained jersey T from that event to this day.
The fun he had spending weeks in Georgia playing at the PG chamionships each July is something he will never forget. He even traveled to Beijing China to play in the Goodwill Series with Rob Williams. He went to Beijing with his close friends and ABD teamates Chris Parmelee, who was a 1st round draft pick this year with Minnesota and Matt Jaimes, 12th round Rangers.

When he decided to hang up his cleats, so many people told me I couldn't allow him to do this with all the opportunities before him to play in college. We were all families that were very involved with our son's baseball careers. I told everyone that this was his decision to make. Of coarse I did discuss all of this with him in depth, but told him I loved him and I would support and respect whatever decision he made.

To the dismay of the high school coach he decided to play Golf instead of baseball this past spring (his senior year). He threw himself into this sport with the same intensity as he had played baseball, practicing every waking moment, but hitting golf balls instead of baseball. The Golf team went 16-0 and he was named to the All League team and once again received the "coaches award", which I feel is the most valuable award.

I told him that while baseball has been a major part of his life it does not define who he is.
He is a young man who has always shown great character on and off the baseball field and I knew he would be a success in life with or without baseball. I am very proud of the young man he has become and how he came through this horrific adversity that faced our family very unexpectedly.

Well, come the end of May when the golf season ended he came home one evening with cuts all over his hands. He told me he had been hitting baseballs. I asked why he was hitting and held my breath for his response. He told me very simply "I wanted to see if I could still hit after not picking up a bat for 8 months".
He smiled and said "Mom, I couldn't believe it, I was hitting better than ever".
He then told me he wanted to play again again and called his ABD coach Mike Spiers to see if he could play with them this summer.

Several days later, the UC Irvine coaches heard he had picked up a bat again and called and told him his spot was waiting for him if he wanted to play with them this fall.
That was always the school he wanted to play for and he will definitely need to earn his spot on this D1 team but what a blessing that he is being givien the opportunity to do so.
I can't say enough about the compassion and support that Mike Spiers (ABD)and the UC Irvine coaches (Dave Serrano, Sergio Brown and Chad Baum) have shown to him.

Right now he is in Marietta, Georgia playing at the PG 18u Tournament and will have an opportunity to play at Turner Field one more time next week at the PG BCS tournament. It was wonderful once again to see that glint in his eyes as he packed his bags for his final trip to Marietta. He told me that he loved being able to play golf but he really missed baseball. It really wasn't time for him to close the door on the sport he has such a passion for. He will be building more cherished baseball memories over these next few weeks and perhaps for years to come. If at some point down the road he decides he has swung the bat for the last time or even if it is a coach who decides that time has come, at least he will not be living with any regrets of having walked away from the sport he loves before it's time...

I have been so appreciative of everyone on the HSBB website through the years and the PG organization who has afforded our boys so many opportunities to showcase themselves and to play ball at their national events. When the 2006 draft list came out, my son commented that he could not believe how many of the players he had come to know at the many PG Showcases and events he had played in throughout the years.
The memories are all priceless!!!

God Bless you all.

Regina Pugliese

RP...Very nice post.

Regina,

God bless you and your family. Your story breaks my heart in one sense but offers great hope in another. You have my deepest sympathies for the tragedy that came upon your family yet, at the same time, you have my utmost admiration for how you and your son have handled things. What a story

Regina,

Your post will bring a tear to many eyes (including mine). Thank you so much for sharing your son's story. My deepest sympathies go out to you and your son and family, but I am thankful that he is finding this source of joy and inspiration again. Thank you.

Regina

Glad to know it is all coming together

Regina,
Thank you for your post. This is what the HSBBW is all about.

Your son went through a difficult time, and his heart was not in it when he decided not to play. But as time heals us after a tragedy and things return to normal, we begin to feel good again about ourselves and we return to the things we love that give us meaning and purpose in life.
Please consider this as a belated condolence and best of luck to you and your family!

Regina:

Thank you for sharing your story with us...your son is moving forward and that is both healthy and a blessing.

You said it very well Tiger Paw Mom...thank you for the post.

Regina ~

Thanks for the post and I'm glad your son has found his way back to baseball.

I will be pulling for him the remainder of this week and next. . . except when he is the opponent!!

I am overwhelmed by everyone's response.
I just hung up the phone with Mike (At the PG Tourny in Ga) who excitedly told me he went 2 for 2 with 2 RBI's. This is the last phone call I would have been expecting to receive just 2 months ago when baseball was nothing but a fading memory....

In the past, either my husband or I were at every game and tournament he had played in. It's the first time he is in Georgia without us. I sure hope he is doing laundry and not wearing the same baseball pants every day!

Now that I am a single Mom I had to stay home with my daughter in So Cal. She will be a high school sophomore and is a volleyball player and needs to be practicing with her HS team this week. Now I am a very active VB mom but I do miss being in Georgia. She also wishes she was there so she could check out the cute baseball players!!!

Regina,

God Bless you and your family. And thank you for sharing your story with us.

Regina,

Best of luck to your son - and you. I hope he continues to get great enjoyment from the game he so obviously loves - and for many years to come.

My best to you and your son.

Regina - As the others have said, thanks for sharing your story.

We had a recent thread in the ladies forum where the topic was giving up baseball. I truly believe that sometimes a player just decides he's ready to hang it up. Obviously, your son was facing some emotions that most of our kids don't have to deal with. However, regardless of the reason, the most important thing is for them to know they're loved because of who they are - not because of how good they are on a baseball field.

I, too, am a single mom with a volleyball playing daughter! It can be a challenge being pulled in two different directions all the time. I'm positive you're up to the task though. You have my respect!

Regina, God bless you,and your family....as Lafmom said....you have my respect, and best wishes too.....

Regina,

I can't say anything any better or add anything more to the responses to your story. Thank you for sharing it, my sympathies, and God bless you and your family.

I’m new to this baseball board, but was very touched by the stories on this thread. They hit close to home. My older son (now in college) was a high-caliber ice hockey player with a realistic chance to play college hockey. In his junior year of high school, he quit playing.

Shortly after my older son quit ice hockey, I posted the following on a local hockey web site. My younger son is about to enter high school as a baseball player and I hope I enter those years with a little more perspective.


“My son’s words struck hard. “Dad, I’m done with hockey.” Twelve years, thousands upon thousands of dollars, countless miles, and untold precious memories later, my son has decided to move on. His heart is no longer in the game.

He quit while playing Midget AAA hockey for one of the top clubs. He was never going to make it to the NHL, but Junior A and even college hockey were on the radar screen. He had been scouted and noticed. He was pretty darn good, and had a chance to reach the proverbial “next level,” at least for a while longer.

Injuries ultimately did him in. In the past two years alone, he suffered a concussion, whiplash, back injuries, and finally, a badly torn knee ligament. (This does not include earlier injuries including a torn rotator cuff, fractured wrists, and other dents and dings.) He played a hard physical game with guts and determination, and he paid for it. Physical therapy was hard and grueling. But at least he is still young and likely will not suffer any permanent disabilities.

What he discovered being away from the game was life beyond hockey. He finally had time to spend with his friends at school. He discovered surfing. He got a girlfriend. He learned what it is like to live without pain. He found himself without the grueling and time-consuming pressures of competitive hockey. He found his smile and contentment.

I sorely miss watching him play and practice. I miss seeing my friends around the rink. I miss commiserating with other parents about the coaches and refs. I miss the hot rink gossip. I miss cold pizza, fast food, and my parka. I miss it all. I realize, however, that the disappointment that he is finished is solely mine; he is well over it.

I still have a bucketload of wonderful memories that I wouldn’t trade for anything. Most importantly, I have a happy, healthy, well-adjusted young man for a son, who is a better person for having played this wonderful game for all these years.

Enjoy the time while you can, and most importantly, keep it all in perspective. After all, it’s only a game and the final buzzer will come sooner than you think.”

DB - very nice post and welcome to the hsbbweb

DB Cooper is an interesting name to have. I believe a guy of the same name parachuted out of a plane many years ago with 200,000 dollars in cash. He was never heard from again. If that's you, maybe we can have a beer sometime for that sounds like a great story to listen to Seriously, sounds like you raised a fine young man.

ClevelandDad: Thanks for the welcome. I have to say I’ve never been fond of the idea of jumping out of airplanes. I hear the name thing all the time. My mother, Minnie Cooper, has it even worse!

Seriously, I should add a little update to my post. My son will be starting his freshman year at USC in a few weeks. While he was playing competitive hockey, he worked just as hard to excel in school as he did on the ice. The result was an excellent GPA and all kinds of solicitations from colleges based solely on academics. The admissions officers didn’t care what teams he made at tryouts, how many games his teams won or lost, how many goals or assists he recorded, how many bodychecks he dished out, how many calls the refs blew, how many coaches failed to recognize his talent, etc. The only thing they cared about is that he dedicated himself to an outside activity which he loved, and that he excelled in school at the same time.

It became very clear to me that sports can’t be expected to be a ticket to college. Too many things can happen along the way. Sports can, however, very nicely round out a student/athlete on a college application.

Welcome aboard the HSBBW D.B.

The last place anyone remembers you is on that flight to Reno when you stumbled out of the exit door under the tail of that Northwest Airlines 727. Someone said you took a swim in the Columbia River east of Washougal,WA. I'm glad to see that you're back with us D.B.

Thanks for the post...it is important to keep things in perspective...and you are testimony to the fact that it is often tougher on the parents than the player when the player decides to hang it up.

u still up gotwood

Since i started this thread back in January 06 when my son decided to "retire" from baseball during his sophomore year of college, some of you have been kind enough to contact me to see how he is doing.

Well, I'm thrilled to report that in two weeks he is graduating college (on time in 4 years) and has found what I would truly call his dream job that he is starting in June. Grad school is on the back burner for now but he may attend in a year or two.

Since his baseball retirement he has truly not looked back and has gone on to do all the other things he had always wanted to try but just never had the time given his (then) devotion to baseball.

He has won two grants for his art work. Served one year as the music director for his school's radio station and as an "on air" disc jockey. Became a staff member for the school paper. He has also taken up mountain bike riding and served two summer internships that lead to the job he is starting this June.

He's gone on camping trips, the proverbial college "road trip", had some romantic "entanglements", done some traveling and other assorted adventures that time never allowed when he was playing.

We still take in a ballgame now and then and he still has two friends still playing from his highschool/travel/club/scout team days (one in the Yankee chain, one with the Phils).

Interesting of the 15 freshman he started with on his college team as a freshman, 7 are still on the team now in their senior year and he's still in touch with most.

He still tells me he doesn't regret one momemt of all the time he played baseball and equally, has no regret that he decided to move on. A few weeks ago, he was home for the weekend and asked if i wanted to play catch but, with the "warning" to not get any ideas, he just wanted to play catch.

His graduation is May 18 and all things considered, all I can say is

quote:

His graduation is May 18 and all things considered, all I can say is

Amen! Sounds like he wrung every drop out of 4 years. Best of luck!