Ok...
Coaches will side with the coaches, parents who are just parents and never really played the game will defend their kids til the day is long. Not one person has seen your kid play so its all relative. Let me tell you what is going on at our school. Private, Catholic with great athletes. Up until last year, never missed D1 playoffs.
Our coach is in his second year. Got his position after two years of being the pitching coach under the former coach who, by all means, was a baseball guy. Not a people person but knew baseball. College coaching technique and his players got to college and played right away. Because he was tough and his baseball technique did not translate to all players, a few parents were miffed. Guess who became buddies with those folks? The assistants. Yup, the pitching coach who is now the head coach. Guess who started feeding the AD info about the head coach and all the parents complaints without naming parents names and adding his personal views on the program? You got it. Flash to two years later and one mistake by the Head Coach with a Phys Ed class (unrelated to baseball) and who is terminated? You guessed it, the head baseball coach. Who is hired? Coach Judas himself.
Coach Judas steps in and softens up the program just the like parents want. We have 5 D1 commits and several kids getting ready to commit. First thing out of his mouth after cuts were made? "Starting today, if you are part of this program, there will be no more outside lessons, nor more club/travel ball and all interaction with colleges will now go through my office!" My son, the future Marc Cuban, and definitely NOT a pitcher and has never worked with this guy, is the first one to respond, "Well I am getting ready to commit in a few weeks, so I would think that I, and others in the same boat are exempt from that plan? And, I have plans to go to Jupiter with my Club team in October because as a 4-year player, that is the ultimate honor by the organization I am with." Judas looked at him with the most evil eyes and said, "We'll see about that." There was never a problem to my knowledge from then on. They got along fine. Son has been a leader as a Junior and the team has been fun.
The season started off well. Through 8 games, the team was 6-2 and 2-0 in league and going into the second game of a double-header on a Saturday. My son was hitting .525 and had 3 doubles and 2 triples on the season. The coach pulled my son over prior to game 2 and said, "I am going to sit you and play Jack the second game. Give you some rest. It will boost Jack's confidence for later just in case we need him down the road." My son thought that was a great idea. Because he loved his teammate he said, "100% behind that, Coach!"
Four games later my son has yet to see the field since that Saturday. The team is 0 and 4. They have scored 3 runs in 4 games and Jack has started every game since. Jack has 12 at bats. 10 Ks. He is hitting .000. A year ago my son would have been losing his mind, paranoid, biting his nails and sitting at the coach's door the next morning at 6:00 am. Now he doesn't see things that way anymore. You might say, "Sure, he is getting ready to commit so he is fine". The commitment thing didn't happen until he went through this change over last summer after being diagnosed with a learning disorder called APD. But that is besides the point. My point is that he realized that things are just out of your control when someone in control is taking away something with no explanation. The way he looks at it is, "Man, I want to win, I see my boys hurting, Jack is struggling, and what is Coach trying to teach me/us here?" Well, he says it like a teenager would say it and I don't help the matter by calling the coach an <insert expletive> moron but we just laugh. But, I would recommend for all baseball players to look into a technique called "mindfullness" as way relax prior to games and after (also for tests and relaxation in general). UCLA has implemented this in their program and they are moving up the D1 ranks slowly but surely this year! Schools across the country as well as business are adopting it.
I have read some of the great responses on here written by coaches. Man do I wish I could print them all out, take them and go pick a team right now. But there are a lot of former pro and collegiate ball players that have convinced themselves they are good coaches that do a terrible job at the high school level. Coaching teenagers is tough. Getting their respect takes time and you can lose it in an instant. It requires the ability to be cool and tough but subtle enough that the young men are still the focus, not the coach. In the case of my son's coach, there really isn't much hope. My wife and I used to enjoy going to his games to relax after a long day at work. My son has asked us to enjoy ourselves somewhere else. He said that other parents aren't coming anymore and he doesn't want us to be there alone. He will tell us when it was fun again. He thinks the coach will have to change sooner or later.
Today my son plays the #1 team in the nation. He wasn't worried about winning, losing or even playing. He was just stoked to be going to their stadium for one last game. As he was was leaving, he said" Dad, I wont forget to say hi to Mr. XX (father from the opposing team) he misses seeing you, you know!". I said, "He enjoys seeing you better. If you have time after the game, please get photos of you and your friends on the other team. We may not see them for a while." It reminded me that just because a bad coach, that no one else knows anything about, can bench for a game or two, he can never take the years of memories, fun times and friendships you have made along the way. Just stay positive, work hard, good things will happen. There is plenty of time.