Husband's anxiety

The word of choice here is RELAX

My son was an outfielder and he did not commit until May of his senior year and then to a major Division I program

dont think anything of it, i got two calls the first day possible, then the other day got 2 calls from two completely different new D1's that i was pretty excited about.

in many programs OF are the runts of the litter

priorities are pitcher, catcher, ss.

Early signing is still a long way off and that seems to be too much focus. Focus on contacting colleges and have a great senior season. Nov signings are for the must have players, the rest of the picks come from senior season play.

Newcomer -
First, it's a waste of time to tell him to relax ... can't be done! My advice is always, "why wait around for a call?" While shutting down the arm is a great thing to do, don't shut down the recruiting communications! Start by having your son pick up the phone and call the coaches who have made contact and find out their level of interest. Continue to widen your target of schools and send out letters with his school schedule. The process for '07's is just starting and there is no reason at all to panic!

Now is a great time to pick up on showcases and make unofficial visits and yes, signing day is NOT until November (it's still August right). And as stated, not all players (in fact only a small portion) get signed early.

Pitchers will always get wooed and offered first, just the nature of the beast. Then sometimes the coach has to offer a bit more to get that pitcher, so he needs to adjust his budget and needs. It all takes time.

Experiencing anxiety is normal, experiencing too much anxiety is not normal.

Please excuse my ignorance on unofficial visits. Is it just a visit to the college to look at the campus or do you make an appointment with someone on the baseball staff to be shown around? Do most programs have a date set for anyone who wants to "visit"? I can't imagine having different players show up several times per week to visit. Is it mostly during the week days (only have a few days excused for college visits). What goes on during these visits? Is it like a guided tour or is it like a casual interview? I look forward to the forthcoming info. Thanks.

Redhead - An unofficial visit is a visit to a college that is on your dollar, not theirs. It could include a visit with the baseball folks which is scheduled or you could drop in. It could include a tour which is scheduled or you drop into admissions and ask for info and do a self guided one. Basically, it's a visit where you make the agenda.

Coaches are actually used to kids doing this. I would imagine some are more receptive than others and of course you always risk no one being there if you don't notify them up front. However, we never did a drop in that the coach wasn't gracious and welcoming.

Lafmom is correct, but be very careful of the recruiting calendar. At son's school I do beleive a recruit, by recruit I mean one who had received recruiting materials, dropped in (football) when he was not supposed to and spoke with someone who was an assistant, not realizing this was in violation (I think I posted that here).
I suggest to always call in advance.

Most schools have a day set aside for academic tours (Clemson I do beleive is saturday for walking tours).

We are in almost the same shape as newcomer. July 1 calls, letters, emails, then all of a sudden at the end of the summer, NOTHING. What was it on July 1 that made it a top priority for these guys to contact my kid, then, two weeks later, go dead silent???? My kid even asked one coach to fish or cut bait - i.e., "I can take it, just tell me if you aren't interested any more" Nothing in response - all from a guy who sent personal emails twice a week for six months . . A pretty strange process if you ask me.

My son had a similar experience, several coaches as for videos. We sent them an in-game video of about 10 ABs. All the coaches said they really liked the video and several said they would be in touch.

Well, no calls from any. But, we are about to nail down the fall schedule and we'll will send this out just to stay in touch.

All I can figure is that they haven't worked down to our name on the list. As with most on this board, trying to be patient.

I feel that the experiences of rcmax29 and The Rock are likely representative of the experience of well over half those being recruited for college baseball. It is unfortunate, but unless your son is known and is known to be a top tier recruit, the process is mysterious, at best.
While I would support being "patient" in terms of anxiety levels, I would also support being persistent in terms of intensity levels.
I would never support "rationalizing" that silence as a good thing. In college recruiting, it usually is not "golden" and, while there are exceptions, often times it means you should move to the next set of schools where you have an interest or which have shown an interest in your son.
One thing I believe is very important to recognize and which we rationalize away: the way the coaches handle the recruiting of your son is likely to be reflective of the way he will be viewed/treated if he enters that program.

infielddad,
Good post!

I liked your last sentence.

If I might add, the way the coaches handle the recruiting process with your son will be reflective in the the way that coach is viewed by your son and most likely will determine where he will play.

Great posts if/dad and tpm. My nagging question is WHEN GIVEN THE CHANCE, WHY CAN'T THESE GUYS JUST BE HONEST WITH A KID??? I don't see the benefit to stringing a kid along for no real reason. We have siblings in our house [academic stars, not sports stars] who see this and are getting a bad taste of some of these institutions. As for our player, there is a good chance he will turn down the jucos and smaller schools that are chasing him, which means he will still be in search of a school - seems to me he will be more attracted to those schools who treated him with a little respect, even when not extending an offer. And back to my original question - why tease and tease a kid on the front end if you have no real interest? (most of all, why, oh why, call him on July 1??? A little junk mail, we can see right through, but why the personal phone calls on the "big day?"

It all just seems so mickey mouse . . .

Our Son was in contact with a recruiting Coach at a school for almost a year. then all of a sudden no response to his emails. With some research he found that the Coach had left that School for another State School. Son is still interested in the School so he then contacted the Head Coach to let him know that he had been in contact with the other Coach. The Head Coach put him in contact with one of his other Assistants and then was invited for an unofficial visit. The visit went very well with both Coaches. They also want to see him at their camp since they were not the ones to see him play. I quess my point is there could be a very good reason why someone has stopped responding. If it was a Assistant Coach you were in contact with try contacting the Head Coach. It may a similar situation to this school.

quote:

WHEN GIVEN THE CHANCE, WHY CAN'T THESE GUYS JUST BE HONEST WITH A KID???

It's not that they're being dishonest. Just as your son is talking with, but not committing to several schools, the coaches are talking to several kids per position. It works both ways and they have a priority list just like the kids. They "court" all the kids, but as their top choices rise to the top, some others may fall off. HOWEVER, this presents other opportunities. Because as another coach isn't hearing good things or getting the responses he wants from choices, he's revising his list and your son can appear on a new list.

He'll continue to hear from new schools. It's truly no biggie to not sign in November - most don't!! You're right to be on top of things - don't want to wait until April and decide to be proactive. Your son just needs to keep in touch with those that have called if he's interested and he can also be approaching new schools.

I don't think it is teasing, it's part of the process. Once you understand it, understand that it happens to everyone, it puts things in perspective. You need to explain this to you son, that this is how it works.
One also needs to learn not to take it personally that your son was not first on their list or on their lsit at all. My son felt that way for while about a school. But in actuality, he just was not their #1 top recruited 04 pitcher. That is just the way it goes.


A coach has most likely spoken to many many players and he is NOT going to call your son back to tell him he is not interested. He will however call if he has made an offer and wants an answer, and may call several times. He will call if he is going to offer an official visit. He will call if the player he had in mind before your son says no, he will call if he has offered a visit and essentially someone else said yes first and asks you NOT to come (we got that one), but he is not going to take it upon himself to call to tell you he's not going to call anymore.
Sue54,
Your example is one of why a player should not be afraid to make a call, things happen like that.
My advice is, if your son has been contacted by a school on several occassions and then the interest stops, make a phone call, instead of waiting for one that may never come.
I know of a player that stopped getting phone calls from a school because the coach heard he was not interested and headed to another place, not true.

So many, many things that go on, but that is because this IS WHAT goes on.

The most you can do is be prepared, for all scenerios and it will be much easier than not knowing about what actually goes on in recruiting.

This may sound silly but why all the anxiety on the part of the parents---what will be will be --when I went thru it there were no showcases as there are now and we did it on our own with no guidance--

TR:

quote:

Originally posted by TRhit:
This may sound silly but why all the anxiety on the part of the parents---what will be will be --when I went thru it there were no showcases as there are now and we did it on our own with no guidance--

What you just described sounds exactly like our LaMaze experience...I agree..."what will be, will be."

Gotwood

Lamaze is not the same thing--the birth of the child doesnt even get on the same page as a kid playing baseball---it is way above--the greatest gift you can have as a parent

Newcomer,

If this makes you or your husband feel any better - my son was an early sign - got a nice scholly - and then was redshirted the first day he set foot on campus.

The coach never once mentioned redshirting during the whole "courtship". In fact - quite the opposite. If he had - my son never would have gone to the school - regardless of the scholly.

Basically - all the work we did during the recruiting process went right down the drain.

Point being - I think you will find many different variations of coaches out there during the recruiting process. Some will be direct - some will give you hints - and some will lie right to your face.

Its a wild ride - you just gotta strap a helmet on, hold on tight and dont give in or give up.!

Good luck!

KA sa ra, Sa ra.
Whatever will be, Will be.
The future's not our's to see.
Ka sa ra, Sa ra.

PATIANCE my friend's. EH

You're absolutely right TR...wouldn't trade my four for anything!

My Wife and one & only, at Freshman Orientation,
I'm left here to man the Fort, And to relay any forgotten INFO that must be Faxed. Like Imunization File's, in the box, down the hall, under the brown box next to the sewing kit.
Or it could be in the up stair's closet, in the second bedroom on the right.

Ya I miss him already. EH

Oldslugger,

Good advice IMO.

And you know - from my perspective - there are good things about it too.
It makes the kid a little tougher - a little more aware of what the real world is like - and alot more determined.

As a player - and as a parent - You suck it up - and keep moving forward. Any way you can.

The moral - as it regards the original intent of the thread.

Dont get discouraged by one disappointment - whether it be a recruiting call that goes silent - or a rough start once you get there.

Just keep moving forward with a steely eyed determination and a fire in your belly.

And hope for the best.

quote:

Originally posted by itsinthegame:
Oldslugger,

Good advice IMO.

And you know - from my perspective - there are good things about it too.
It makes the kid a little tougher - a little more aware of what the real world is like - and alot more determined.

As a player - and as a parent - You suck it up - and keep moving forward. Any way you can.

The moral - as it regards the original intent of the thread.

Dont get discouraged by one disappointment - whether it be a recruiting call that goes silent - or a rough start once you get there.

Just keep moving forward with a steely eyed determination and a fire in your belly.

And hope for the best.

MY prediction:

A wise man(D1HC) told me my 07 can be a star in the middies. He also told me he could be one of many solid players in the elite.

Its all about the challenge I am told by the one who has to perform. If that entails limited PT, possible RS even though we were told thats a nada, so be it.

The bigger the challenge, the quicker the possible resolve. Unless you face the very best possible in your level of play, you are wandering in the dark!!

See CDAD string of posts regarding his kid. It will take you on a wild ride, but a good one!!

I AM DULY IMPRESSED CD/TB..........and thanks for repping NEO, and the cold weather players.....try going 3-4 in a snowstorm...........

Oldslugger,

I have been following CD's son for quite awhile now. He is a very impressive young man IMO.

As for wild rides - I have been on this one for many years now. Its a "Loop the Loop" baby - LOL

Wow....thank you guys for the kind words...

OS is right...the game is about production...

Until you get the chance however, you don't know if you can produce...

Hard to do that though when they don't even give you a chance as itsinthegame suggests

Relax, really. Many D-2's and "lower" D-1's don't get really cranking until August or later, and D-3's later yet. Reason: they let the smoke clear and don't waste time on blue chips that jump to higher level programs. There is a ton of time left.

Newcomer,

IMO - Hokie is dead on.

There is a long way to go yet.

Focus on the things you can control during this process.

And best of luck!

quote:

Originally posted by OLDSLUGGER8:


In the end, the best field performances will prevail.

That may be true - but what about the beginning and the middle? LOL

LOL

Husband was a bit mortified that I posted something about him here. However, I think there's been some good advice, some comfort and a healthy dose of reality check in the responses. He's been absorbing some of the comments. Now he's almost tolerable to be around!!

Some good and interesting info here:

For the parents/kids who are underclassmen, I would recommend strongly looking at this thread and searching posts from prior years so you do not have surprises (or can anticipate some questions/concerns) once you are entering ur senior year.

A few points including probably others have mentioned:
1- The recruiting process is going to be a little different for everybody. If your Son has D1 talent but is not a Top prospect...the process may take a little longer. IMO...It also is going to differ by the position he plays and exposure he has had. As well as the level of the program their internal recruiting timelines are going to be different. Some Top programs (not all) will have wrapped up most commitments by end of August and will have a few to finish up in the Fall. Some Mids wont start heavy till Sept once the dust has settled..as others have said.

2- Be realistic... hopefully ur Son has been evaluated independantly and its not just Mom and Dads scrapbook that anyone is judging their own Son's talent.

3- Hopefully you keep an eye on the prize. A College education in an environment that is conducive to your Son, with the proper balance of the athletic program.

4- 11.7 Scholarships with a roster from 25 to 40. Be realistic. From what I've seen when most people are talking full or 80 or 90% rides you are talking all AID, which would include academic (which is not a bad thing) and also financial aid. Of course there are exceptions.
Of course it is important to know where the money is coming from...you want there to be a significant investment from athletic (if its is appropriate based on your Sons skill)

5- Some states in the South have Hope Scholarships for instate academic awards (it can help put a very strong total package together).

6- Don't forget many coaches talk to each other so don't try to blow smoke. If you want to negotiate fine but if it is your Sons #1 school be realistic.

7- If you are picking a school based on the scholly IMO it may be for the wrong reason. Look for the school and program that is a good fit.

In regards to relaxing...not going to happen...but at least try not to stress ur kid out (take to closet drinking and smoking).

Continue to be proactive... contact coaches, particapate in showcase events and let interested schools know where you are going to be or find out what showcase/tourneys they will be attending this fall. If a showcase says that a school is attending call the coach see if it is true! Some Showcases tend to list who has attended in prior years, it doesn't mean the school is definitely attending this year. Also talk to the showcase operator if it is a reputable program he will let you know who will be there for sure.

Good Luck to all... and if all else fails Johnny Walker on the rocks

Good post Novice Dad!

We too are in the same boat as far as having a senior and getting contacts. Have had jucos, DIII's, and 2 D-I contact us, but no offers yet.

Now that I think about it, seems like recruiting is a bit like fishing. Sometimes you don't know whether to pull on the little nibbles, or wait for the big one. Patience is the key, but sometimes the big one never comes and you end up getting a smaller one. The smaller one may end up being just as good!

Had the anxiety also. No calls between end of July and mid-August. Then all of a sudden phone rings again last week and son sets up 2 visits last night, both within the next 3 weeks. All is well again! I am in the car business, but I got nothing on this whole thing.

It is what it is....we are just trying to enjoy it!!

To show how much coaches talk:

My son worked out with a D-2 during a visit. A coach from another conference school called him the following week and knew what he had thrown velocity-wise. What a grapevine.....

Got our first call last night. Son wasn't at home and mom fielded the call. Coach ask if school was on his list, then ask if it was high on the list. Mom said school was on the list, but he needed to speak with him. Coach ask for his email address, but didn't receive one yet.

Question, should we take the initiative and call coach back or wait on his email?

Rock, Have your Son be ProActive on this one.
Show interest to the school's He want's to go to. And to the One's that show interest in Him.
The rule's of conduct by a Coach during Recruiting is Tight.
Player's can contact coach at anytime, But not the other way around.
You can find the Coaches rule's in the Recruiting section of this site. EH

quote:

Sometimes you don't know whether to pull on the little nibbles, or wait for the big one. Patience is the key, but sometimes the big one never comes and you end up getting a smaller one. The smaller one may end up being just as good!