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Okay, it's a slow dreary day, so here is something to make you go "WHAT?!?!?!?"

 

I posted on here awhile ago, JOKINGLY, that someone could make a killing in the Atlanta area if they advertised that they could project the ability of a 6u or 8u player because people here are WAY into the kool-aid.  I'm talking about hundreds of dollars for 8u private lessons, and we even have 6u Travel Teams!

 

I got this email yesterday.

 

"Dear Parents & Coaches of young ballplayers:

We are a team of professional scouts, coaches, and former players. Send us some brief "current" footage of your ballplayer and we will tailor a professionally detailed assessment that will provide you with:

- player's current strengths & projection
- constructive feedback on how to improve in their weaker areas

Our focus group is between the ages of 8 - 14. All skill levels are accepted. Some age exceptions will be made. Phone consultations are also available and highly recommended (especially for parents of our younger players).

Head to our website and sign up for your video evaluation today:"

 

                   

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I also heard they were going to start a "finishing" school in the true southern fashion.  Instruction will be provided on the following...

 

- The art of spitting - Projection is everything (aka stop spitting on your shoes)

- Today's Style - How to wear that cap bill (also in depth discussion on pant cufffs)

- Coaches Correspondence - Leave out your favorite candy for highest impact

- Numerology - What your number says about you (can you count that high?)

- Bat Fashion - How to make that 2015 look like the 2016 model

- Bat Flipping - How to strut the bases when you clear the 140' in left field

 

Other?

They'll probably make a killing. LOL.

My kids birthday was yesterday and we pulled out some toddler pictures and remembered how we were suckered into an agreement with a photographer, who "specialized" in getting our pretty baby exposed for commercials and retail ads.

Like the old saying goes "there's a sucker born every minute"

We were one of them

Originally Posted by 2017LHPscrewball:
- Bat Fashion - How to make that 2015 look like the 2016 model

 

I laughed pretty hard at this one!  I can't tell you how many times I over heard the conversation:

 

Kid: I have the wrong bat.

Parent: What makes it wrong?

Kid: It's the wrong color, see Johny's bat, IT'S the right color!

Parent: But they both say "XXXXXXXXX", I don't understand

Kid: It's the WRONG COLOR!!!!!!!

 

LOL, meaning it was the wrong year bat!

Originally Posted by joes87:
Originally Posted by Nuke83:
Originally Posted by joes87:

Think they can give players from the 6U state T-Ball championships feedback?

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfbHdNvfVpw

 

Here's my feedback.  Neither of those songs should ever be used in sports video . . . 

Had the same through while I was watching it...

While i agree to an extent, I do like song two, "Closed mouths don't get fed on this boulevard" but then again, i do live in the Dirty South.

I keep this filed away for threads like this

 

Perfect Game Toddlers announced

 

The industry leader in showcasing and scouting of the nations top 7-11 year olds announced today a new organization for tracking and following the most critical talent pool for baseball available;  kids aged 2-6 years. “After extensive studies on MLB players we have found a direct correlation between high performance baseball skills and the performance of kids games such as; duck duck goose, four square, and ring around the posey” “We have found that kids that excel in hand eye coordination games that we used to think were for fun and entertainment for our kids actually translate into high performance baseball skills at the major league level” said program director Ferris Wheeler.

 

‘Our research has shown that if we can track toddler’s performance and help them improve their performance in kids games then they will be able to translate these skills directly to the baseball field, abet a few years later” We have found that for instance that the Hockey Pokey is a perfect warm up and cool activity, “you can warm up and cool down by shaking it all around” said Dr. I. Ball director of physical programs for PGT.

 

Although tailored and directed toward identifying the top 200 Toddlers in the United States this program is by no means meant to be exclusionary. “We think all kids need to participate in dodgeball and Jacks” said Dan Saul Knight Western Director for PGT.

 

Said Eastern Region Director Ginger Vitus “we will be sure to make sure that there will be opportunities for kids of all skill levels to participate” “though performance testing we can easily identify the top 200 toddlers without upsetting the play yard” she added.

 

I.P. Daily program devloper said “we will begin introductory showcases starting next week in Florida” we will initially focus the program on the South East and then we plan on actively introducing this program to the rest of the county”

 

Filling out the PGT staff will be Hy Ball, Director of Hockey Pokey, Iona Frisby, Director of duck duck goose, Lois Price, Director of Jacks, Noah Lott, Director of doggy where’s your bone, Sam Manilla, Director of red light green light, and finally Sum Yung Guy, Director of Marbles.

 

Once successful in the South East  PGT plans on opening toddler development and testing centers across the United States. “We think that that this program will dovetail perfectly with Gymboree where kids were having fun, but not developing the necessary skills to make them rich and famous like we all want our kids to be” said  National PGT spokesperson Constance Noring.

 

          ########

 

 

Good one BOF.

 

The only problem I see is that all of these activities will have to be coordinated by a private professional organization since schools no longer allow games in which someone will lose or get hurt (physically or emotionally) or be put in any position to lose some degree of "self-esteem" at this age.  Dodgeball is actually outlawed even thru HS now.  I guess that opens up a whole new industry to track and promote "playground games".  

Originally Posted by bballman:

       

Good one BOF.

 

The only problem I see is that all of these activities will have to be coordinated by a private professional organization since schools no longer allow games in which someone will lose or get hurt (physically or emotionally) or be put in any position to lose some degree of "self-esteem" at this age.  Dodgeball is actually outlawed even thru HS now.  I guess that opens up a whole new industry to track and promote "playground games".  


       


Ah HA proof that my kids school is behind the times, he played dodgeball in 8th grade PE today.
Originally Posted by CaCO3Girl:
Originally Posted by bballman:

       

Good one BOF.

 

The only problem I see is that all of these activities will have to be coordinated by a private professional organization since schools no longer allow games in which someone will lose or get hurt (physically or emotionally) or be put in any position to lose some degree of "self-esteem" at this age.  Dodgeball is actually outlawed even thru HS now.  I guess that opens up a whole new industry to track and promote "playground games".  


       


Ah HA proof that my kids school is behind the times, he played dodgeball in 8th grade PE today.

Where I teach, the faculty versus students intramural dodgeball match is a big "hit" (literally) and well attended.

Originally Posted by Ripken Fan:
Originally Posted by CaCO3Girl:
Originally Posted by bballman:

       

Good one BOF.

 

The only problem I see is that all of these activities will have to be coordinated by a private professional organization since schools no longer allow games in which someone will lose or get hurt (physically or emotionally) or be put in any position to lose some degree of "self-esteem" at this age.  Dodgeball is actually outlawed even thru HS now.  I guess that opens up a whole new industry to track and promote "playground games".  


       


Ah HA proof that my kids school is behind the times, he played dodgeball in 8th grade PE today.

Where I teach, the faculty versus students intramural dodgeball match is a big "hit" (literally) and well attended.

Same around here. Also a few massive school sponsored dodgeball tourneys 

I believe there was some organization a few years ago claiming provided genetic information they could determine what sport a kid was most likely to be successful. Imagine getting back a response for your five year old ... I'm sorry. Your child is destined to suck at sports. It doesn't appear he/she will be very bright either.

Originally Posted by BOF:

I keep this filed away for threads like this

 

Perfect Game Toddlers announced

 

The industry leader in showcasing and scouting of the nations top 7-11 year olds announced today a new organization for tracking and following the most critical talent pool for baseball available;  kids aged 2-6 years. “After extensive studies on MLB players we have found a direct correlation between high performance baseball skills and the performance of kids games such as; duck duck goose, four square, and ring around the posey” “We have found that kids that excel in hand eye coordination games that we used to think were for fun and entertainment for our kids actually translate into high performance baseball skills at the major league level” said program director Ferris Wheeler.

 

‘Our research has shown that if we can track toddler’s performance and help them improve their performance in kids games then they will be able to translate these skills directly to the baseball field, abet a few years later” We have found that for instance that the Hockey Pokey is a perfect warm up and cool activity, “you can warm up and cool down by shaking it all around” said Dr. I. Ball director of physical programs for PGT.

 

Although tailored and directed toward identifying the top 200 Toddlers in the United States this program is by no means meant to be exclusionary. “We think all kids need to participate in dodgeball and Jacks” said Dan Saul Knight Western Director for PGT.

 

Said Eastern Region Director Ginger Vitus “we will be sure to make sure that there will be opportunities for kids of all skill levels to participate” “though performance testing we can easily identify the top 200 toddlers without upsetting the play yard” she added.

 

I.P. Daily program devloper said “we will begin introductory showcases starting next week in Florida” we will initially focus the program on the South East and then we plan on actively introducing this program to the rest of the county”

 

Filling out the PGT staff will be Hy Ball, Director of Hockey Pokey, Iona Frisby, Director of duck duck goose, Lois Price, Director of Jacks, Noah Lott, Director of doggy where’s your bone, Sam Manilla, Director of red light green light, and finally Sum Yung Guy, Director of Marbles.

 

Once successful in the South East  PGT plans on opening toddler development and testing centers across the United States. “We think that that this program will dovetail perfectly with Gymboree where kids were having fun, but not developing the necessary skills to make them rich and famous like we all want our kids to be” said  National PGT spokesperson Constance Noring.

 

          ########

 

 

Last edited by smokeminside

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