Sad realities of high school cuts

quote:

Originally posted by RJM:

quote:

Originally posted by Proud Dad 24:
RJM,

Your level of compassion really ****es me off. Is that politically correct enough for you?

I provided four possibilities ...

1) get a job
2) play rec ball
3) team manager
4) hang out

Three are viable suggestions. One is not as I mentioned. What's wrong with my suggestions? What over suggestions do you have?

Sometimes short, quick practical responses, may come off as cold & uncaring. Hopefully, that isn't what you meant...

quote:

Originally posted by MN-Mom:
Mizzou,

Kudos to your son and his teammates for caring enough about this boy to get their thoughts organized and then talk to the coach about trying to include him. Plenty of players come from less-than-perfect homes, but how many have this many strikes against them?

For the sake of this young man's future, I hope the players are able to convince the coach to say to him: "This team seems to care enough about you that you would be a positive influence on morale. If you care enough about this team and are willing to take on that job... bringing a positive attitude to practice and games, knowing that you may never get into a game all year... then we have a roster spot for you."



I really hope it works out for this young man and for the team. Let us know.

Julie

It is sad when this day comes around.

Unfortunately, for all kids, this day will come around. Sometimes at 16, sometimes at 40. But it may not totally be over for him.

The first thing I would do is have him find out what he needs to do to make varsity next year. He is a Junior so there is a chance he can make it back next year, if he really wants to do this. If it is a weight problem then there are ways to fix that, if he really wants to do it. Drop the weight, work hard to improve his speed and he may just get on the team next year.

I'd have him talk to the coach and see if he can at least help out with the team after school. He may not officially be part of the team but if he helps out the coaches he will show that he is really motivated to be part of the team and maybe that will help him for next year.

I guess it can be an opportunity or a brick wall, depending on how he looks at it. If he knows his weaknesses and is honestly motivated to improve on them then he may just work his way back on the team.

What else does this school offer kids in the spring time? Typically track and field is in the spring so maybe he can do that or possibly some sort of organization that meets sometime after school such as an academic team or FFA type. Let's face it people - this kid doesn't need just baseball, he just needs something to occupy his time and hopefully on the straight and narrow.

If you throw all your eggs into the baseball basket then what do you do in a year and five months when this kid graduates? Baseball will be done by then, your son will move on to college a few months after that and then where is this kid in the grand scheme of things? All you did was put off what could have happened right now.

With kids like this you have to look big picture and long term in order to give them chances to stay on the right path. I've seen this happen many times and it's sad. You can't just put a kid in a uniform and expect it to help him later in life.

At a larger school you can't expect a coach to keep seven kids who are in this type of situation. But if the school can offer other things then you can give all seven options to keep them involved and on the right path.

I am a little shocked that he was cut after just 2 days of try-outs. Not a lot of time to make decisions. There are options in the spring in your area for those that do not make the team. It could be a viable option for him if he is interested.

These are very tough decisions that no coach enjoys. There have been times when a player I've cut has been devastated, angry, sad, etc. only to move to another sport and thrive. One player who was crushed after being cut as a 10th grader moved on, joined the boys' lacrosse team, and ended up being a captain who received a scholarship to play lacrosse in college. Would that have happened if I kept him on as a team manager? There are no easy answers when it comes to compassion. One sees compassion as keeping a kid in the game of baseball in some fashion. Another sees compassion in forcing a kid to find where their true talents are located.
Not easy to do but that's why we get the big bucks!

BaseballByTheYard

quote:

My son said the team is going to talk today and figure out a way to get him on the team.

I have to ask the question. Were there other kids cut? If so if you take this kid back how do you explain not taking others back.

The fact that the team is working on this together speaks volumes about the boys on the team. Good for them.

Even if they aren't successful, they are showing support and concern for this kid that his own parents aren't showing. This could have a positive impact regardless of results.

For some kids, their "family" has to be defined by more than blood relationships. This kid is in a very difficult situation, but at least he has a family of friends around him.

quote:

Originally posted by johnj314:
Mizzou- I really hope that the boys can convince the coach to keep him on the team. Sounds like he needs the support structure...However if it doesn't work there is a spring league in Ballwin for kids that don't play for their High Schools for what ever reason- cut, grades, other issues, etc...my son played in it when was in 8th grade and just missed the May 1st cut off for 14U and it is a great option. I think from previous posts of yours that it sounded like you are out in St. Charles Co. so transportation may be a problem for him as could the $150.00 entry fee. But Ballwin runs a good league and the games are on great fields.

John, thanks so much for this. I forgot all about this league. I texted my son this morning and he asked me to get the info since I can go online here at work.

The team did decide not to go to the coach. As I thin WILL pointed out, what about the others cut. The "leader" of the team brought up that if they would bring the guy back, then what about the others. Would parents of the other kids cut start going to the AD and trying for the same.

Thanks for everyone's thoughts on this, even the hard a$$es

I'm reading the replies from Coach2709, Meach and twotex and I think they may have something seriously worth considering. My first reaction was that this kid clearly loves baseball and that is the outlet he responds favorably to. But, at some point, baseball will likely go away. Will he have other interests then? It sounds like this group of boys (who, I agree, should be commended) just might be capable of getting him excited about some other interest and continue to include him in their circle around baseball time?

I got cut from my HS baseball team as a sophomore. I was so mad. I hated the coach. I picked up another sport. I was All-America in college and competed in a nationally televised national final on HBO (in 1982-HBO was very young and showed all kinds of odd things). My life changed in an incredible way. None of that would have happened if I hadn't been cut from my HS baseball team. That doesn't mean I'm still not mad about it. My dad is 80 something. I bet he's still mad that I got cut.

you can look at getting cut in another light-- as a player--- wow--- another open spot on the roster

It is clear that a very big thing this kid has going for him is the care and concern of your family and members of the team. That may well be more important to his current transition than anything else. It may not be enough by itself, but he is lucky to have it.
After reading the thread I am inclined to agree with the wisdom of those suggesting that this is an opportunity for him to expand his areas of interest and activity so he has more than baseball to keep him heading in a good direction. Some guidance and continued friendship can go pretty far.

when you get cut it is somebody elses opinion that you are not good enough. 2 things a kid can do accept the other persons opinion or prove they were wrong. there are several stories of players who got cut from their high school team and went on to be successful.