What does "go where loved" look like in your experience?

For my middle son, the one he went to was the first one and the most attentive.  They were there every time he pitched.  They were the first one to make an offer.

It was similar with the youngest son.  He desired SEC and where he went was the first SEC to offer with a good offer.  The HC was at almost every game he pitched for all summer.  They did not rush it and was very willing to let him take his time. 

I think you know when you are loved by the way they respond.  I always say it is like a dating relationship.  You know when you are loved by how they respond. 

@wildcat posted:

We're new at this. Son has some good D1 offers and keeps hearing the advice to go where you are loved most, and that's exactly what he wants to do in addition to needing the school to fit his academic interests. The prestige of the team or conference doesn't matter as much. What demonstrates being loved by a program during the recruiting process? Any stories to share for examples? It's hard for us to know what is typical in the process and what is above and beyond. He's a pitcher, if that matters.

Not my experience but relayed to me from a friend. His son is a pitcher. Had several offers. But one school assigned a coach just to him. He said, literally, this coach talked to his son regularly, had his schedule (etc.) and he was there for every game his son pitched - regardless of the time and location. 

If that's not showing love, what is?

@Francis7 posted:

Not my experience but relayed to me from a friend. His son is a pitcher. Had several offers. But one school assigned a coach just to him. He said, literally, this coach talked to his son regularly, had his schedule (etc.) and he was there for every game his son pitched - regardless of the time and location. 

If that's not showing love, what is?

 

The rapport and attention from the recruiting coach is good.

But love is expressed in the amount of the scholarship. That is how schools value a player.

@Go44dad posted:

The rapport and attention from the recruiting coach is good.

But love is expressed in the amount of the scholarship. That is how schools value a player.

True dat.

Thanks. Son is feeling lots of love but I don't know if it's standard in the recruiting process. How involved is the head coach typically? 

@Francis7 posted:

Not my experience but relayed to me from a friend. His son is a pitcher. Had several offers. But one school assigned a coach just to him. He said, literally, this coach talked to his son regularly, had his schedule (etc.) and he was there for every game his son pitched - regardless of the time and location. 

If that's not showing love, what is?

 

I am not sure what assigned means,if you are a pitcher the pitching coach should be the one developing the relationship, same goes for position players.

Some players may not get athletic money because some instate programs are very affordable and the athletic money goes to the out of state players.

Every situation is different.  Some players don't care, it's the school that attracted them not the coaches.

@wildcat posted:

We're new at this. Son has some good D1 offers and keeps hearing the advice to go where you are loved most, and that's exactly what he wants to do in addition to needing the school to fit his academic interests. The prestige of the team or conference doesn't matter as much. What demonstrates being loved by a program during the recruiting process? Any stories to share for examples? It's hard for us to know what is typical in the process and what is above and beyond. He's a pitcher, if that matters.

My son has committed to a D3 school so his experience of being "loved" is going to be different than your son's if for no other reason than there is no scholarship offer.  But, my son did pick the school that seemed to "love" him the most.  They were one of the first schools to call and it was the head coach doing the calling, not one of his assistants.  The coach made it plain whenever they talked that he liked what he saw in my son.  And, it didn't feel sleazy, like a come-on, or cheap, like he said it to every kid, but genuine.  We could tell when the coach talked about how my son would fit into his program, that he really meant it.  He talked a lot with my son about how he approached playing baseball and explained how my son's skills fit with that approach.  The coach also made clear that the offer included essentially guaranteed admission, so we knew he was using one of his "slots" on our son.  But, we really knew when my son called to accept, and the coach was basically over the moon.

Too often we think with our desires as opposed to logically looking at reality.

School # 1 the recruiting coordinator calls a kid, they have a good talk.  After that, the RC responds to texts but doesn’t initiate them himself.  Doesn’t call back for 3 months.  Then another good conversation happens and ends with him saying, I’ll text you next week to schedule a time to get you on campus for a visit.  The next week comes and goes.  Crickets.  The kid then texts the following week and says “Coach I’d still love to visit campus if you are still interested”.  Coach texts him back 5 minutes later and they schedule a visit.

School # 2.  Great conversation with the RC.  The Head Coach personally calls the kid the next day telling him “you are exactly the type of student athlete we want in our program” and then proceeds to go into details as to how the kid fits into their future plans, what type of majors would fit with the kid, sells the kid on the investments they are making in their indoor facility and how great the academics and Baseball at the school are.  The conversation ends with “let’s get you on campus as soon as possible, and I’ll call you back in 3 weeks, I really hope you choose our program”.

Only somebody who just blindly has their heart set on School #1 would even dare to think of them as a better option.

I agree with above...if youre chasing them down, they dont love you

Gimme money, that’s what I want! 

TPM ... Could you explain how the tuition free system in Florida works. I know there are other southern states who also have it or similar programs. I believe it’s funded through the lottery. Doesn’t it have something to do with getting a 3.0 or 3.5 gpa for levels of money? 

One of my son’s teammates was going to play at Notre Dame or not play. Everyone in his family went to ND. He turned down money elsewhere to walk on at ND. That’s loving the school! He became a starter. 

@RJM posted:

TPM ... Could you explain how the tuition free system in Florida works. I know there are other southern states who also have it or similar programs. I believe it’s funded through the lottery. Doesn’t it have something to do with getting a 3.0 or 3.5 gpa for levels of money?  

It's not tuition free it's reduced according to GPA, as you mentioned  and funded by the lottery called Bright Futures in Florida.   Different rules for state or private schools. I am pretty sure these are the rules, but may have changed.

Many parents enroll their children in FL prepay in a tax advantage 529 plan which is available in many states.  But you have to be able to fund the program and many parents cannot do that.  That is where the athletic money would be rewarded. 

So if a student gets Bright Futures and his parents enrolled at birth there probably is enough for cash back to live off campus after first year. FL state schools tuition is very affordable.

My friends son went to play football at a D3,  was able to transfer back to UCF, no football, and it's not costing them a penny.  

This is a good question, but also incredibly difficult to answer.  At least in ways that pertain to everyone or most.  Many won't like this answer, but you will truly know it when it's there.  You'll feel it.  It'll be obvious or very close to it. 

With my 2021's experience, he had 2 instances where we knew he was loved.  He then had a few that liked him or liked him a lot.  He's going the JUCO route and his offer was very generous.  It very much matched all the "love" we were seeing and hearing.  To describe it in one word, it was AUTHENTIC.  Like most things in life, you know when it's the real thing.

My son got his share of "we really like you, what's your upcoming schedule" and such.  Lots of texts and calls over a period of months.  But we didn't feel the love.  

Then School Number 1 came along - They followed son for a long time and saw him play probably 20 times.  They talked regularly.  When we met on campus he said "We really like the way you play, leadership...blah blah blah... we think you can contribute right away... blah blah blah... here's what we're offering" - it was an extremely generous offer, beyond my expectations by far, for 4 years.  He said take all the time we need, there's no deadline.  Wow.  I had one question for the coach - how many players graduate in 4 years.  His response - "very few to be honest.  If he's still with us after 4 years and hasn't graduated I'll pay for the 5th".  That's what I call love.

School Number 2 - similar discussion as school 1 but more and thicker.  He followed my son from Georgia to AZ all summer.  They talked after each tournament.  When we met on campus he said my son was his first offer and wanted to build the class around him.  He couldn't offer money (Ivy) but guaranteed to get him accepted, which was all we wanted.  This time my wife had one question - "It's not easy to get to the airport from here, how is he going to come home for Thanksgiving?"  His response - "If he needs a ride I'll drive hime".  That was some good love right there.

He decides to go to School Number 3.

@Smitty28 posted:

My son got his share of "we really like you, what's your upcoming schedule" and such.  Lots of texts and calls over a period of months.  But we didn't feel the love.  

Then School Number 1 came along - They followed son for a long time and saw him play probably 20 times.  They talked regularly.  When we met on campus he said "We really like the way you play, leadership...blah blah blah... we think you can contribute right away... blah blah blah... here's what we're offering" - it was an extremely generous offer, beyond my expectations by far, for 4 years.  He said take all the time we need, there's no deadline.  Wow.  I had one question for the coach - how many players graduate in 4 years.  His response - "very few to be honest.  If he's still with us after 4 years and hasn't graduated I'll pay for the 5th".  That's what I call love.

School Number 2 - similar discussion as school 1 but more and thicker.  He followed my son from Georgia to AZ all summer.  They talked after each tournament.  When we met on campus he said my son was his first offer and wanted to build the class around him.  He couldn't offer money (Ivy) but guaranteed to get him accepted, which was all we wanted.  This time my wife had one question - "It's not easy to get to the airport from here, how is he going to come home for Thanksgiving?"  His response - "If he needs a ride I'll drive hime".  That was some good love right there.

He decides to go to School Number 3.

No!  Really?!  I suppose you DO have to love them back.  How has it worked out at #3?

@LuckyCat posted:

No!  Really?!  I suppose you DO have to love them back.  How has it worked out at #3?

He really liked them both.  Either would have been great.  He wanted something bigger, and wants to be an officer in the Marines and fly, so he picked Navy.  He loves it, couldn't be a better fit for him.

My 2021’s experience with love from the school he will be attending is short and sweet.  The recruiting coordinator/hitting coach saw a video of son hitting in the cage.  Contacted my son..son asked if they were going to have any showcases so the coaches could see him in person.  The RC told him that wasn’t necessary because he was ready to offer right then.  Actually two weeks later he sent over an offer...which was the highest % scholarship that they give position players.  In my mind that shows a lot of love by the coaches to a guy they saw on a simple video.  We will be forever grateful to them.

@Tim Turner posted:

My 2021’s experience with love from the school he will be attending is short and sweet.  The recruiting coordinator/hitting coach saw a video of son hitting in the cage.  Contacted my son..son asked if they were going to have any showcases so the coaches could see him in person.  The RC told him that wasn’t necessary because he was ready to offer right then.  Actually two weeks later he sent over an offer...which was the highest % scholarship that they give position players.  In my mind that shows a lot of love by the coaches to a guy they saw on a simple video.  We will be forever grateful to them.

Wait until he’s in the lineup before getting too grateful. Verballing is just the first gate. But it sounds like he will get a solid opportunity.