Son pitched a playoff game in a showcase tournament and lost. 

I am hoping he isn't really down on himself because there were some definite bright spots. Do you have examples of when your kids lost and bounced back?

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How was his velocity? How was his composure as it wasn’t going well? If these were ok it might not have been the disaster he believes. What he has control of is how he analyzes what he did right and wrong. How he will approach his next outing. And believe in himself and be confident. The only way to approach the situation is believe in yourself and move on.

I watched our summer team ss make 7 errors in one game. College coaches were running all over themselves to talk to him after the game. Same game my son pitched one the the best games he ever pitched and not one coach talked to him. Coaches are not looking at results.

In college: my son once threw 5 wp in a row, once threw three balls OVER the backstop yet struck out the batter, against LSU threw 20 (yes, 20) balls in a row, once threw a ball over the back stop at the Cape. 

He was drafted - anyway.

(There was lots of good stuff in between. Baseball is all about failure and how you deal with it. Hard, hard, hard game.)

Last year at WWBA my son hit the start at a LakePointe game. PG tweeted it out ahead of time and every coach he had ever talked to plus a ton more showed up. He tanked.  Felt terrible for him.  He was pulled after a few innings and went and did his normal recovery. He had two offers that I was  afraid would be pulled. It wasn’t a huge deal in the long run. Certainly didn’t help him, but several coaches that saw it later recruited him hard, so it didn’t knock him off the list either. Tell him to let it go. Flush it and move on.  They look at how you do in failure as well.  Everyone will have an off day.

Shake it off! Learn the old Sinatra song..."That's Life"

Remember, you've got 7 guys behind you that will "make you look good" Learn to TRUST them!

You and your catcher develop a "symbiotic" relationship. He knows you better than himself & visa versa. Both of you learn the hitters niche (study scout reports) him, don't give him his pitch...give him what he can't hit!

Analyse an off day as just that! Recover quickly...Baseball is 1 pitch at a time. 

Great opportunity for you with your 2022... actually would have been even better without the bright spots.  It is a big part of the game for every single player and a good checkpoint for seeing how they are handling failure as an individual and as a teammate.  They will all struggle/lose and bounce back hundreds, maybe thousands of times.  What is important is how they handled themselves in the process.  Did he stay positive and battle thru the last pitch?  Did he continue to try to lift his teammates or retreat, drop his shoulders or pout?  Teaching and parenting opportunity... be sympathetic but don't accept behavior unbecoming of a young man of character.

Also, the approach RJM and baseballmom describes is key.  Actively analyze, learn, adjust, be confident, move on.

Son had a 7-1 record as a junior. College coach came from out of state to watch him pitch the one game he/his team lost. Coach actually seemed more interested in him after the loss — he told son — "I knew you could pitch. That's the game where I learned you could battle."

Pitching is never sunshine and roses. You will somedays have bad days. Or really bad days. The question is how do you respond?

So, I think you need to focus on the positive not the negative.   Attitude is everything especially in baseball.   My son picked his high school (which ended up being a huge boost academically), unfortunately his high school baseball  team was not among the best in a very competitive baseball region that has many, many kids commit to D1 schools every year.   It was a similar story in college....he picked the college and always tried to do his best on the field.   In college there is going to be serious competition for playing time, setbacks, and injuries.   You can't focus on the negative.   Sure my son had his moments when he could do no wrong and but also when he could do no right.  He got over it quickly, and learned from it.

I think one of the most misleading stats in baseball is Wins and Losses.  Starting pitchers can do everything right and still lose a game.   I've seen it many times.   The team, and the people that understand baseball know this.   If your son competes on the mound, demonstrates composure, and has good stuff....he'll get noticed.   If there were college coaches or scouts in the recent showcase stands try to get some feedback from them directly or through the travel coach about his performance.  We had a number of college coaches who saw my son pitch 3,4,5 times before finally reaching out.  I don't think it will change things but I think you'll quickly realize they don't care about wins/losses in a travel game or showcase it is about how your son projects at the next level.

Good luck!  As always, JMO.

PS....I saw one of Goosegg's son first college career starts @VCU.  He's not kidding, he had a live arm.  ;-)

Thanks everyone. Good stories. I appreciate the shares. Turns out this was a case of being a worrying parent for no good reason. Son came home and was happy with how he played and focused on what was working, and I hear he stayed very composed. He amazes me with his mental game and how he is growing up. My bad for worrying too much...lesson learned!

I didn’t get nervous when my kids played sports. I didn’t get nervous when my son pitched. There’s a reason. When I was a college freshman I was a two way. That year I was a backup outfielder and a situational lefty pitcher. 

I started my college hitting career 0-16 with 7 whiffs. When you don’t know when you’re going to play next that’s a lot of suffering. It took a month to stink that much at the plate one at bat at a time. The second weekend of the season I came in to get the last out against a lefty, chucked a hanger and gave up a walk off homer.

While watching my kids I could always reflect back on “Stuff happens!” And it happens to everyone who competes. It’s how you come back that matters. 

The high end travel ball our kids play(ed) is more competitive than the high school and Legion ball we played as kids. We (best players I played with and against) dominated until college. Today’s high level travel ball brings failure down to the high school age. Failure is a learning experience that goes far beyond baseball.

When my son was a high school soph he was picked off first to end the season. The team finished one game out of districts. He didn’t come out if the dugout until everyone was gone except me. For lack of LifeSavers I tossed him some Certs. He laughed. He put one in his mouth and pocketed the rest. 

It’s a negative baseball moment I haven’t forgotten years later. I now smile when I think of it. One year later he was diving on the top of the dog pile after the last conference game. He was on base after driving in the tying run and moving the winning run to second. 

So for all the parents who sweat it, as long as the kid has the right attitude there’s always tomorrow.

Everyone makes mistakes in BB. The trick is what you do with your next play, or outing. My 15yo has always been a top pitcher. It always came easy to him- excellent control and composure. Fielding was his weakness. This year he has turned himself into a "+" OF'er, to his delight. That long lanky frame is tracking down balls and breaking batter's hearts.

   But can he throw a strike? Nooooooo...!

   I blame puberty for everything.

It's just Baseball.  As others have said, failure is part of it.  Just in the last few weeks I've seen my kid take better at bats than he ever has in his life and take at bats that his 11 year old self might have had a better approach with.

The key, as a player, is not to ride an emotional roller coaster on every up & down moment.  Stay focused in the right now.   Trust your preparation, and if necessary do a better job with your preparation.  Baseball is a game of an adjustments.

For hitters, sometimes it is a matter of approach:  hunting fastballs, being aggressive, getting ahead in the count if they are pitching around you,or jumping on that first fastball if they are coming right at you.

For pitchers, sometimes it is a matter of changing your pitch sequence, disrupting the hitter's timing, pitching to a hitter's weakness, and learning how to set up your out pitch.

It is a wonderful game.  But, maddening.  Which makes it all that much more wonderful

fenwaysouth posted:
 Starting pitchers can do everything right and still lose a game.   I've seen it many times.   The team, and the people that understand baseball know this. 

Yep.   The ace pitcher with a 95 mph FB (HS fall league) on my son's team threw a no hitter and the team still lost 1-0.  Never put enough hits together to score a run.  Pitcher's only mistake was walking one batter in the early innings who eventually scored on a wild pitch/passed ball.  Several MLB scouts were at that game.   It didn't stop them from following him the following spring (senior year) and one team drafting him in the 6th round.

Coaches see with baseball eyes. The outcome of a game doesn't change their impression of what they see. My son beat a future first rounder in front of a whole herd of scouts--it didn't change anyone's mind about either one of them. The first rounder was still a first rounder. My son was still a guy who would need his degree. 

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