My 2018 is corresponding with a coach who suggested to him a book called "Start with Why." The coach asked him then to think about why he plays the game. I'll give others a chance to chime in first, but then I'll post his answer, which made me a little teary. These kids have depths we often don't suspect. Why does your child play?
Replies sorted oldest to newest
Because he loves the game, the competition and the camaraderie. He likes watching the ball go over the fence off his bat when others aren't expecting it! He likes to prove he can be successful in a game littered with failure.
I am very fond/appreciative of the life lessons it teach's him (drive, hard work, perseverance, respect, etc.).
It's who he is.
I spent significant time in my daughter's life telling her that softball is what she does and it is not who she is. Any failure on the field was almost debilitating to her. She had to be the best you name it. Now, her career is over. She is now coaching. She drives over an hour one way to volunteer to coach. She says that she loves the game so much that it would destroy her not to be involved. She's turned into a really good coach.
“If There Is No Struggle, There Is No Progress” -Frederick Douglass
Douglass' quote was part of a speech about freedom prior to the Civil War. But he was also a fellow "baseball dad" so I am sure he would agree it would also be applicable.
Go44dad posted:It's who he is.
While that might be correct in how he feels at this point in his timeline I would caution you as a dad to not to support that. The game should be a part of him but only a part. At some point he needs to be able to remove the game and still be a strong and productive person. I have seen to many kids feel completely lost when the game ends for them.
I think the game should be life lessons, the competition and the friendships that go along with the ride. Maybe they will coach when they are done maybe they will find a new love, create a business empire around some aspect of the game they love...but it IMO it shouldn't be its who I am. I think a person needs to be bigger then that.
I asked my son that last year, his response was "Because when I'm on a baseball field everything makes sense and I can do anything. It's off the baseball field where life gets complicated."
He had a fight with his girlfriend at her school dance, in order to think through it he went to their baseball field, she found him on the mound.
Here's what my 2018 told the coach who asked. I like his answer, and that he spelled most of the words right!!
I feel that I play out of love of the game. I've grown up around it and come to understand the beauty behind it, the complexity behind every pitch. Everything someone does on a baseball field, even as minor as two steps to your left, can have major impact on the remainder of the game and that just become so intriguing to me. I love trying to understand why someone threw that pitch, or why they bunted rather than try a hit and run or other things. The game itself, in a sense, is why I play the game.
Somewhere buried deep, like it or not, a key reason they play is to make their parents happy. " Watch this Dad." If I had a dollar for every time I heard that I could retire. The danger here is that when they grow & the game becomes increasingly difficult, they value themselves based upon results & how they think you interpret those results. I try to tell mine to play for himself, first. I will be there whatever the result. You may think they understand this inherently, but it needs to be stressed. You, as a parent, need to be consistent in your reaction to the results, good or bad. It frees them to enjoy the game with no fear of failure, a key ingredient for success.
old_school posted:Go44dad posted:It's who he is.
While that might be correct in how he feels at this point in his timeline I would caution you as a dad to not to support that. The game should be a part of him but only a part. At some point he needs to be able to remove the game and still be a strong and productive person. I have seen to many kids feel completely lost when the game ends for them.
I think the game should be life lessons, the competition and the friendships that go along with the ride. Maybe they will coach when they are done maybe they will find a new love, create a business empire around some aspect of the game they love...but it IMO it shouldn't be its who I am. I think a person needs to be bigger then that.
I get that. But be that as it may, it's his identity. All the stories, parables, morals, talk-to's, counseling in the world won't change that right now. He believes strongly that it's his legacy.
Steve A. posted:Somewhere buried deep, like it or not, a key reason they play is to make their parents happy. " Watch this Dad." If I had a dollar for every time I heard that I could retire. The danger here is that when they grow & the game becomes increasingly difficult, they value themselves based upon results & how they think you interpret those results. I try to tell mine to play for himself, first. I will be there whatever the result. You may think they understand this inherently, but it needs to be stressed. You, as a parent, need to be consistent in your reaction to the results, good or bad. It frees them to enjoy the game with no fear of failure, a key ingredient for success.
I would make me happier if he kept his room clean but he doesn't do that. j/k LoL
hshuler posted:Steve A. posted:Somewhere buried deep, like it or not, a key reason they play is to make their parents happy. " Watch this Dad." If I had a dollar for every time I heard that I could retire. The danger here is that when they grow & the game becomes increasingly difficult, they value themselves based upon results & how they think you interpret those results. I try to tell mine to play for himself, first. I will be there whatever the result. You may think they understand this inherently, but it needs to be stressed. You, as a parent, need to be consistent in your reaction to the results, good or bad. It frees them to enjoy the game with no fear of failure, a key ingredient for success.
I would make me happier if he kept his room clean but he doesn't do that. j/k LoL
Hey if you get that figured out let me know & we can write a book & then retire! 
Iowamom23 posted:Here's what my 2018 told the coach who asked. I like his answer, and that he spelled most of the words right!!
I feel that I play out of love of the game. I've grown up around it and come to understand the beauty behind it, the complexity behind every pitch. Everything someone does on a baseball field, even as minor as two steps to your left, can have major impact on the remainder of the game and that just become so intriguing to me. I love trying to understand why someone threw that pitch, or why they bunted rather than try a hit and run or other things. The game itself, in a sense, is why I play the game.
Wow. I'm trying to imagine a way in which that even remotely compares to the garbled mess that typically came out of the mouths of my kids when they were HS juniors. 
My son and I talk very little about his baseball journey. I've never asked him why he plays because I think that I know.I would be more likely to ask that question if he didn't look like he was having a blast.
Steve A. posted:hshuler posted:Steve A. posted:Somewhere buried deep, like it or not, a key reason they play is to make their parents happy. " Watch this Dad." If I had a dollar for every time I heard that I could retire. The danger here is that when they grow & the game becomes increasingly difficult, they value themselves based upon results & how they think you interpret those results. I try to tell mine to play for himself, first. I will be there whatever the result. You may think they understand this inherently, but it needs to be stressed. You, as a parent, need to be consistent in your reaction to the results, good or bad. It frees them to enjoy the game with no fear of failure, a key ingredient for success.
I would make me happier if he kept his room clean but he doesn't do that. j/k LoL
Hey if you get that figured out let me know & we can write a book & then retire!
Will do!
cabbagedad posted:Iowamom23 posted:Here's what my 2018 told the coach who asked. I like his answer, and that he spelled most of the words right!!
I feel that I play out of love of the game. I've grown up around it and come to understand the beauty behind it, the complexity behind every pitch. Everything someone does on a baseball field, even as minor as two steps to your left, can have major impact on the remainder of the game and that just become so intriguing to me. I love trying to understand why someone threw that pitch, or why they bunted rather than try a hit and run or other things. The game itself, in a sense, is why I play the game.
Wow. I'm trying to imagine a way in which that even remotely compares to the garbled mess that typically came out of the mouths of my kids when they were HS juniors.
Son spends much of his time with his grandfather, a history professor and long-time baseball fan. Dad hasn't so much taught him about baseball (son is a Yankees' fan, dad is a Reds' fan) as he's taught him to think about the game, and apparently, to put his thoughts into words. I'm really grateful.
Iowamom23 posted:cabbagedad posted:Iowamom23 posted:Here's what my 2018 told the coach who asked. I like his answer, and that he spelled most of the words right!!
I feel that I play out of love of the game. I've grown up around it and come to understand the beauty behind it, the complexity behind every pitch. Everything someone does on a baseball field, even as minor as two steps to your left, can have major impact on the remainder of the game and that just become so intriguing to me. I love trying to understand why someone threw that pitch, or why they bunted rather than try a hit and run or other things. The game itself, in a sense, is why I play the game.
Wow. I'm trying to imagine a way in which that even remotely compares to the garbled mess that typically came out of the mouths of my kids when they were HS juniors.
Son spends much of his time with his grandfather, a history professor and long-time baseball fan. Dad hasn't so much taught him about baseball (son is a Yankees' fan, dad is a Reds' fan) as he's taught him to think about the game, and apparently, to put his thoughts into words. I'm really grateful.
Very cool. That explains it. My kids have me
When he was young he would have responded, "Because its baseball season." After his sister verballed for softball he did respond, "Anything she can do I can do better." When high school came around it was about loving the game, being the best and getting to the next level. I'm guessing four generations of college players on my side of the family and two on the other had an impressionable impact.
cabbagedad posted:Iowamom23 posted:cabbagedad posted:Iowamom23 posted:Here's what my 2018 told the coach who asked. I like his answer, and that he spelled most of the words right!!
I feel that I play out of love of the game. I've grown up around it and come to understand the beauty behind it, the complexity behind every pitch. Everything someone does on a baseball field, even as minor as two steps to your left, can have major impact on the remainder of the game and that just become so intriguing to me. I love trying to understand why someone threw that pitch, or why they bunted rather than try a hit and run or other things. The game itself, in a sense, is why I play the game.
Wow. I'm trying to imagine a way in which that even remotely compares to the garbled mess that typically came out of the mouths of my kids when they were HS juniors.
Son spends much of his time with his grandfather, a history professor and long-time baseball fan. Dad hasn't so much taught him about baseball (son is a Yankees' fan, dad is a Reds' fan) as he's taught him to think about the game, and apparently, to put his thoughts into words. I'm really grateful.
Very cool. That explains it. My kids have me
My guess is they are very lucky in that.
Folks, please forgive me for boasting, but this is why mine plays. He answered this question this morning...in the last line, lol...
baseballmom posted:Folks, please forgive me for boasting, but this is why mine plays. He answered this question this morning...in the last line, lol...
Very Cool! Congrats to you both-
DesertDuck posted:baseballmom posted:Folks, please forgive me for boasting, but this is why mine plays. He answered this question this morning...in the last line, lol...
Very Cool! Congrats to you both-
Very nice and that's not boasting - congrats!
DesertDuck, I had nothing to do with it! He has fought hard the last 2 yrs to get back. So much is out of their control...He can have faith that his performance is what a Team needs at the moment...and expect that things will change in an instant...
For son, those tiny little molecules in his veins are red & white baseballs! lol
baseballmom posted:DesertDuck, I had nothing to do with it! He has fought hard the last 2 yrs to get back. So much is out of their control...He can have faith that his performance is what a Team needs at the moment...and expect that things will change in an instant...
For son, those tiny little molecules in his veins are red & white baseballs! lol
You may not have much to do with it anymore, but he certainly had to get 'what he has' from somewhere? I mean that type of stuff doesn't just fall out of tree's into a kids lap.....lol
baseballmom posted:Folks, please forgive me for boasting, but this is why mine plays. He answered this question this morning...in the last line, lol...
Amazing, baseballmom... no better answer than that. You moms have some special mojo going here lately. Iowamom asks the question and baseballmom's son answers in a big way. Congratulations!
baseballmom posted:Folks, please forgive me for boasting, but this is why mine plays. He answered this question this morning...in the last line, lol...
this is awesome, it looks like he needs about 1.5 or so seasons to get the full pension! That is HUGE!!! best of luck.
cabbage, it's all about timing...I believe strongly, ALL is in God's Timing! Rangers head to NY tonight. They may use him tomorrow against Yankees...where it all began...And with the burglary in May, maybe I'll get to have a "comeback ball" or more like a "Restoration Ball" to replace his stolen Debut balls...
Thank you, all! I'm humbled!
So let's hear from some more of our boys, please! Keep the inspiration going...
baseballmom posted:Folks, please forgive me for boasting, but this is why mine plays. He answered this question this morning...in the last line, lol...
No forgiveness needed! Congrats!
PO Jr reasons have evolved over the years. At first I think because it was cool to put on a uniform, run around and throwing things without getting yelled at. As time went on, he enjoyed the competition, the thrill of victory and understanding that even though they had losses, he and teammates still had a good time. I think that is still the way he feels today. I think his "Why" would be just that. He plays the game he loves, because it is played with others that feel the same way.
This summer, he was given permission to work/intern. No summer ball after throwing a lot of innings(68 1/3). He was fortunate to get a position with the organization that run the youth camps for the SF Giants and the SD Padres. He coaches, leads other coaches, interacts with both kids and parents, and gets the opportunity to shadow management. He stopped by after his first week as a coach and the first thing he did was hug his Mom and say "Thank you for raising me the right way". She said you're welcome, now go share what you learned with those kids.
The cool part of his job is that they visit AT&T once a week for tours, behind the scenes stuff and meet with current or former players.
baseballmom posted:Folks, please forgive me for boasting, but this is why mine plays. He answered this question this morning...in the last line, lol...
So very cool. Congratulations to both of you!!!
While I don't stop by nearly as often as I once did, I always find that when I do there are a few threads that made me really glad I did. This one certainly falls into that category.
From a parent's perspective, the game was always the vessel that one son had chosen to use as a means of developing into adulthood; and I viewed it as a very good one for him to have chosen. As he worked hard at it and developed useful skills on the field, he learned many lessons that would serve him well in a much broader environment.
Fortunately for him, his passion and love for the game, itself, never wavered; and it still serves him well as his chosen profession. However, had he chosen at any point to have left it for another line of pursuit, I would have welcomed the new path as much as I always embraced his pursuit of baseball. ...and, he would have benefited mightily along that new path from all that he had learned from his days in baseball.
1 - he simply loves the game as he's been playing since he was 4
2 - he says dad, "I just feel at peace when I'm on the bump no matter what's going on "
3 - he just loves being part of a team and having that brotherhood, which has turned into some of his best friends
4 - he likes wearing and representing his schools name / colors across his chest... hopefully he will do that another 4 years in college, anything after that is icing on the cake!
Lastly - I had a big ole LOL moment... he says dad, "I can only fish so much!"
