@Francis7 I am so sorry that the journey has been bumpy so far. Believe me, it happens to the best of us and the most important thing is to recognize it and make the best decision for your child. Wishing him much success in his new home.
@PTWood posted:@Francis7 I am so sorry that the journey has been bumpy so far. Believe me, it happens to the best of us and the most important thing is to recognize it and make the best decision for your child. Wishing him much success in his new home.
Thanks. If anything, it gives perspective and really reminds you to appreciate the good things because nothing is guaranteed.
@Francis7 posted:How long ago was your son a college freshman baseball player?
*Last year (2021-2022)*
What level was he playing? Juco, D3, D2 or D1? Something else?
*Juco*
Did he stay at that school through graduation? If not, how many different colleges did he attend?
*He will graduate with an AA after 4 total semesters*
If he switched schools, why did he switch?
*everyone in Juco is there to switch (obvious but important to the climate in a competitive Juco program)*
How much did your son play as a freshman? If he did not play, was he redshirted? If he was redshirted, when was he told about it?*He got more playing time as the season progressed. In Feb he saw very little and by April he was playing regularly but not every game. He got enough AB’s to get a rhythm going (maybe 60). Also he played like eleventy five thousand innings of intersquad
*
What were the biggest surprises and challenges for your son freshman year?
*I can only speak to my perspective as a Dad; He would put it differently:
1. He dropped into a two-year process for which the only way out was a stretcher, getting cut, or his coach endorsing him to his next opportunity. There was no “one and done” scenario where he would find his great 4 year after 1 year.
2. It was [edited]. Second year has not been that way, and I think that speaks to (my) expectations being reset and (his) resolve, and different team dynamics. He is very thankful for the experience.*
Overall, how was your son's experience as a freshman baseball player? Did it meet, surpass or miss his expectations? How about in regard to your expectations as a parent?
*Fall was quite difficult, but by end of Spring we could see/appreciate where things were going for him. I would classify as “unexpected” vs missed expectations.*
Based on your son's experience as a freshman baseball player and your's as the parent, what advice would you have for the freshman player and his parent?
*Like Ron Washington’s character said in Hatteberg’s living room: “ITS INCREDIBLY HARD.” Embrace that and things might just go easier than expected
This is a tough time from a mental health perspective. For any man going off to school, but in a special way for these boys. I don’t have any advice there besides to be aware, be a solid, and stay in touch with your son.*
My take on this is different. Relatively speaking, it is NOT that hard.
Being 18 and shipped off to World War II is hard. Living in extreme poverty is hard. Living during the Great Depression was hard.
Kids these days, in general, are soft. Extremely soft. Prior to the pandemic, the softest generation of All Time, and that left them completely unprepared mentally for any adversity from the pandemic.
And, parents and kids have in general unrealistic expectations as to just how great they are or how easy the road will be, and in my opinion this is fueled by the completely over the top bizarre travel ball industry that is driven overwhelmingly by the money from the families of slightly better than mediocre talent.
”My kid hit a Double in 16U against a Ole Miss commit = if he just gets a chance he can be a 3rd or 4th round pick” and “a scout told him he’s got a nice swing” kind of thing. * And hey, look, looking back I fell into that trap myself from time to time when my son was in high school! *
My son got 5 at bats as a freshman. At a D3. In a lower level D3 conference. Now as a sophomore so far he’s still not starting but has appeared in all but one game so far.
He’s getting a huge percentage of school paid for at a great academic institution. He’s making close close friends with his teammates. He’s learning what hard work truly is. He is one of the kings of campus in terms of female attention etc. He’s getting a very good education. His spring break trip to Florida was a blast: 9 games in 7 days, a day off for sightseeing, complete trip paid for, great food, sunshine etc…
Its not exactly hard times in a soup line…
@3and2Fastball posted:My take on this is different. Relatively speaking, it is NOT that hard.
Being 18 and shipped off to World War II is hard. Living in extreme poverty is hard. Living during the Great Depression was hard.
hey @3and2Fastball, the “incredibly hard” line is from Moneyball, and he certainly wasn’t suggesting playing 1st base was like shipping off to war. He means it’s harder than it looks, which I think you’re saying, too.
My kids have finished the journey. They’re young professionals. They had quality college baseball/softball careers. How often does it come up in conversation? Almost never. They have younger cousins who are college athletes. Being an athlete comes up at Thanksgiving.
College is a stage of your life. Then you move on to the next stage. There’s so much more to accomplish in life. Don’t get stuck dwelling on a past stage whether it was positive or negative. You might get stuck there.
@3and2Fastball posted:My take on this is different. Relatively speaking, it is NOT that hard.
Being 18 and shipped off to World War II is hard. Living in extreme poverty is hard. Living during the Great Depression was hard.
Kids these days, in general, are soft. Extremely soft. Prior to the pandemic, the softest generation of All Time, and that left them completely unprepared mentally for any adversity from the pandemic.
And, parents and kids have in general unrealistic expectations as to just how great they are or how easy the road will be, and in my opinion this is fueled by the completely over the top bizarre travel ball industry that is driven overwhelmingly by the money from the families of slightly better than mediocre talent.
”My kid hit a Double in 16U against a Ole Miss commit = if he just gets a chance he can be a 3rd or 4th round pick” and “a scout told him he’s got a nice swing” kind of thing. * And hey, look, looking back I fell into that trap myself from time to time when my son was in high school! *
My son got 5 at bats as a freshman. At a D3. In a lower level D3 conference. Now as a sophomore so far he’s still not starting but has appeared in all but one game so far.
He’s getting a huge percentage of school paid for at a great academic institution. He’s making close close friends with his teammates. He’s learning what hard work truly is. He is one of the kings of campus in terms of female attention etc. He’s getting a very good education. His spring break trip to Florida was a blast: 9 games in 7 days, a day off for sightseeing, complete trip paid for, great food, sunshine etc…
Its not exactly hard times in a soup line…
I grew up in a different state from where I live now and where my kids were born. I'm also one of those older dads. I was almost 40 and almost 42 when my kids were born. (Wife is much younger than me.) So, I grew up in a different place and time.
When my kids were young, we took them on a tour of where I grew up. Stuff like "This was my first house growing up" and "This was my middle school."
When the kids saw how far the middle school was from the house, they asked me how I got there and I said "I walked."
Hearing that, my son, who was around 10 at the time asked: "Grandma let you walk THAT FAR to school?"
And, my answer without hesitation was: "No. Grandma MADE ME walk that far to school."
Kids are different these days. But, a lot of that is because of how the parents treat them.
@3and2Fastball posted:My take on this is different. Relatively speaking, it is NOT that hard.
Being 18 and shipped off to World War II is hard. Living in extreme poverty is hard. Living during the Great Depression was hard.
Kids these days, in general, are soft. Extremely soft. Prior to the pandemic, the softest generation of All Time, and that left them completely unprepared mentally for any adversity from the pandemic.
And, parents and kids have in general unrealistic expectations as to just how great they are or how easy the road will be, and in my opinion this is fueled by the completely over the top bizarre travel ball industry that is driven overwhelmingly by the money from the families of slightly better than mediocre talent.
”My kid hit a Double in 16U against a Ole Miss commit = if he just gets a chance he can be a 3rd or 4th round pick” and “a scout told him he’s got a nice swing” kind of thing. * And hey, look, looking back I fell into that trap myself from time to time when my son was in high school! *
My son got 5 at bats as a freshman. At a D3. In a lower level D3 conference. Now as a sophomore so far he’s still not starting but has appeared in all but one game so far.
He’s getting a huge percentage of school paid for at a great academic institution. He’s making close close friends with his teammates. He’s learning what hard work truly is. He is one of the kings of campus in terms of female attention etc. He’s getting a very good education. His spring break trip to Florida was a blast: 9 games in 7 days, a day off for sightseeing, complete trip paid for, great food, sunshine etc…
Its not exactly hard times in a soup line…
This is the equivalent of "I walked up hill both ways to school" argument. Yes parents are unrealistic about their kids, and baseball is blah blah blah blah blah....etc....
But calling this "the softest generation of All Time" (emphasis on your capitals, not mine) because they've never experienced generational hardships to your standards seems a bit overboard and a tired argument that's overused. How do you even quantify "the softest generation of All Time"? As I tell my kids "you don't know what someone else is going through, have some empathy".
@nycdad posted:This is the equivalent of "I walked up hill both ways to school" argument. Yes parents are unrealistic about their kids, and baseball is blah blah blah blah blah....etc....
But calling this "the softest generation of All Time" (emphasis on your capitals, not mine) because they've never experienced generational hardships to your standards seems a bit overboard and a tired argument that's overused. How do you even quantify "the softest generation of All Time"? As I tell my kids "you don't know what someone else is going through, have some empathy".
Fair enough. Then let me ask you with all seriousness: which generation is or has been softer? Millennials perhaps, as they didn’t have to go through a pandemic during their youth?
Asking sincerely, I have an open mind
Can the argument be made that kids have changed because parents have changed and parents have changed because the world has changed and the world has changed because the kids who changed grew up and became adults who changed the world....never mind...my head hurts.
This will go down a rabbit hole that no one will want it to go down because this will get political very fast. Or at least perceived to be political.
Naturally, everyone's experiences are vastly different. My daughter was the school's top recruit and she knew she would start as a freshman. This wasn't a promise from the coach but rather she had a strong belief if herself and a history of outstanding achievements. Fortunately for her, she was part of a strong recruiting class which resulted in four other freshmen starting as freshmen. This is rare. Still, the upperclassmen were cruel. The other freshmen in that recruiting class didn't make it into the season. For the rest of the recruiting classes, only one freshman would start for any of those classes. As it is with human nature, there were constant complaints about politics, abilities, and how much money parents raised in fundraisers.
Per "kids today," nothing changes, and kids today are no different than at any other time. Their challenges are different and, perhaps their parents are different. IMO, you have players in college who are driven and will not accept being anything less than the best. Many of them, but not all, also are competitive in the classroom. There are those there that view athletics as an avenue to an education and while still competitive, want to make sure that they get a quality education. Then, and we all know this even if some don't want to admit it, there are players in college who are playing because they don't want to disappoint their parents. With the level of play and requirements to play at these higher levels, they soon weed themselves out but do so in various ways. JMHO!
I do think the level of athleticism has increased, which makes current Baseball more difficult
A pitcher from our area was drafted in the 3rd Round twenty years ago because he threw 90. My D3 kid and his teammates will annihilate 90 mph fastballs if there isn’t a great offspeed pitch to keep them off balance.
Theres a Shortstop on my son’s team who runs a 6.6 sixty, that was unheard of in D3 ball recently. Lots of pitchers on his team throwing mid 80’s or higher, etc etc
there are players in college who are playing because they don't want to disappoint their parents.
Years ago I had the opportunity to meet Dr Joel Fish. I was introduced by a friend who became a youth sports advocate after his NBA career.
Dr Fish is the head of the Center for Sports Psychology. They have many Team USA and professional teams under contract. But he said in numbers their largest client base is teen travel kids whose parents have screwed them up mentally with pressure to perform. He told me a majority want to quit the travel sport but don’t dare tell their parents. They don’t like playing anymore. But due to the time and money the parents have invested they don’t dare quit.
He said if they don’t quit travel they tend to quit when they get to college and don’t have the parents hanging over them.
@PitchingFan posted:This will go down a rabbit hole that no one will want it to go down because this will get political very fast. Or at least perceived to be political.
For the best of HSBBW politics, please visit this thread, classic.....
This one could have easily gone down that same path. And still might.
That was the train wreck no one could turn away from. Every day I was like not going to read it. But I had to.
There used to be a political topics room. The rule was don’t leave the room with your politics. When the site changed platforms the forum disappeared.
@PitchingFan posted:This one could have easily gone down that same path. And still might.
That was the train wreck no one could turn away from. Every day I was like not going to read it. But I had to.
Is the last paragraph a clever reference to all the suspicious train derailments that have occurred in the past 60 days?
This one is/was a truly beautiful thread, representative of the best of HSBBW.
No Adbono. Buttttt since you brought it up. Just kidding.
@3and2Fastball posted:Fair enough. Then let me ask you with all seriousness: which generation is or has been softer? Millennials perhaps, as they didn’t have to go through a pandemic during their youth?
Asking sincerely, I have an open mind
I get what you're saying, and sorry I should have probably been more nuanced in my response. I think my age group (I'm late 40s) probably have it easier than kids today. But I have friends that lost family in 9/11 and they'd likely disagree. I just don't want to pigeon hole an entire generation. It may be a cop out but I don't think I could say classify one.
@nycdad posted:I get what you're saying, and sorry I should have probably been more nuanced in my response. I think my age group (I'm late 40s) probably have it easier than kids today. But I have friends that lost family in 9/11 and they'd likely disagree. I just don't want to pigeon hole an entire generation. It may be a cop out but I don't think I could say classify one.
I'd say I was pretty lucky to be born in 1966. I was too young to be drafted into the Vietnam war and too old to consider serving in Iraqi Freedom. My generation focused on work-life balance and had enough money to buy a house and save for retirement. Overall, if I'm honest I'm pretty soft in many ways. But I worry about my kids future all the time: the risk of war; diminishing influence of religion; political divisiveness; evils of social media/porn; the biases of media outlets; the list is long. I don't think todays generation has it easy at all.
So baseball serves as a bit of a compass for them. Learn how to get along with others. Be positive and supportive. Learn how to face failure. Have goals. Learn that hard work has intrinsic value. And importantly, keep them so busy they can't get in too much trouble as teens.
That all said, my 2023 thinks Millennials are a bunch of entitled, weak sauce, man bun narcissists... He cracks me up.
@Dadbelly2023 posted:I'd say I was pretty lucky to be born in 1966. I was too young to be drafted into the Vietnam war and too old to consider serving in Iraqi Freedom. My generation focused on work-life balance and had enough money to buy a house and save for retirement. Overall, if I'm honest I'm pretty soft in many ways. But I worry about my kids future all the time: the risk of war; diminishing influence of religion; political divisiveness; evils of social media/porn; the biases of media outlets; the list is long. I don't think todays generation has it easy at all.
Interesting, I was born in 1969 same generation. I would have been comfortable arguing that ours was the last generation that wasn't coddled, was sent out to play for the day without needing to check in or be worried about it, was trained to crush the world because that is what America does, understood what the cold war was and meant and why it had to be won and so forth....the people in my generation at least that I associate with have struggled with work life balance and many have raised kids to soft to effectively compete. I guess experiences vary.
I did my best to raise 2 well rounded kids who are prepared to go crush the world because that is they are supposed to do. I also worry about today generation but that is because I believe to many of them are soft or worse....I think baseball people are typically in the upper percentiles of success the general rank and file are way way behind.
Why can’t they be like we were?
Perfect in every way.
What’s the matter with kids today?
-Bye Bye Birdie 1960
@Dadbelly2023 posted:I'd say I was pretty lucky to be born in 1966. I was too young to be drafted into the Vietnam war and too old to consider serving in Iraqi Freedom. My generation focused on work-life balance and had enough money to buy a house and save for retirement. Overall, if I'm honest I'm pretty soft in many ways. But I worry about my kids future all the time: the risk of war; diminishing influence of religion; political divisiveness; evils of social media/porn; the biases of media outlets; the list is long. I don't think todays generation has it easy at all.
1966 here too. The leading edge of Gen X.
I’ll try to get us back on topic@Francis7 posted:Anyone willing to answer some or all of the following questions?
How long ago was your son a college freshman baseball player?
Freshman this year
What level was he playing? Juco, D3, D2 or D1? Something else?
JUCO (FL)
Did he stay at that school through graduation? If not, how many different colleges did he attend?
Should have AA after 3 semesters. 2 yr commitment here, then hopefully off to somewhere he’s as happy
If he switched schools, why did he switch?
#JUCORoute
How much did your son play as a freshman? If he did not play, was he redshirted? If he was redshirted, when was he told about it?Everyday starter with a few innings on the mound here and there. Leading team in several offensive stats.
What were the biggest surprises and challenges for your son freshman year?
In the beginning of the fall season it took a little time to get used to the physical grind and the quality of the pitching day in and day out. Once he did, he starting having more success and started rapidly climbing the lineup card.
It wasn’t really a surprise, because I’ve been watching this conference for a long time, but the number of scouts/recruiters in the fall is insane.
Looking ahead at the “recruiting out of JUCO” phase, has me in a weird place mentally. I know it’s driven by his JUCO coach, and we trust him… still just seems a little strange.Overall, how was your son's experience as a freshman baseball player? Did it meet, surpass or miss his expectations? How about in regard to your expectations as a parent?
For my wife and I, it really couldn’t be going any better!
For our son, he’s really enjoyed getting to know some high caliber players from around the country. He’s playing against some great competition, which he loves. He enjoys the coaches a lot also, which has been a big plus.Based on your son's experience as a freshman baseball player and your's as the parent, what advice would you have for the freshman player and his parent?
He definitely made the right choice going JUCO! Just this spring he’s had over 100 plate appearances so far. Find a place where there is a path to playing time.
1. Control what you can control! 2.When you get the chance to grab that bull by the horns, don’t you dare let it go!Did your son complete 4 years of college baseball eligibility? If not, why?
TBD
Way to go Tug Tide! Your son definetly made a great choice!