.

Gotwood, Just returned from Parent weekend.
Saw son's dorm room he share's with another ballplayer.

Men do stink, but not as bad as two 18 yr. old's living in a dorm. LOL

It still reeks in here. I'll leave the windows open for someone else to close later.

WHOA!!! That green thing came near to biting me. Anyone have the number to animal control?

Was that like Ecoli spinach dip.
That would make you have a bad day.

Open up the window, let some air into this room
I think I'm almost chokin' from the smell of stale perfume
And that cigarette you're smokin' 'bout scare me half to death
Open up the window, sucker, let me catch my breath

Mama told me not to come
Mama told me not to come
"That ain't the way to have fun, son"
"That ain't the way to have fun, son"




Hey could somebody turn the music down.... Can't hear a thing!!!!!!

Gotwood,
I think my mother-in-law plays that instrument. Sounds kinda like bagpipes being beaten with a cat.

Gotwood, I called the number like you said. They came out, but left. They said they would touching any animal that sounded like it was being beaten against a bagpipe.

Woody, I think it’s Jimmy Page… yea that him alright… You Shook Me…. I might be mistaken… I’m just Dazed and Confused… must be a Communication Breakdown. Hey turn the stereo back up…

Tip-toe,.. tip-toe,...sh-h-h-h-h-we're entering the MENS ONLY FORUM...ok gals,.... take your positions..... On your mark get set,..goooo!!!!!

Varoooom,.....( sound of a vacumn ) swish- swish,...( toilet bowl being cleaned ).......spray-spray, ( GIANT cans of Lysol being dispensed )....

Postie note left on frig says: " ~ fumigator has been called & will be here on Friday ~ "
( he'll let himself & his task force team in, through open window. )

Frig has been hosed out and beer properly replaced, aroma therapy candles lit, and fresh home baked lasagna & brownies on the counter.

Its up to all you men to get the 786 bags of trash out to the curb by the back door. ( I won't mention their contents,..but the words " ewwwwww " come to mind! )

One last note:
Spoke to the nice policeman that came by due to neighbors complaining the music was too loud. Funny thing,...he said something to the effect of,

" Because of the color of my amazing green eyes,..yadda yadda yadda,...he'll just have to let you all get by with a warning this time. " ?????

All socks have found their mates and are folded in neat rolls in the top dresser drawer. Fresh hand towels can be found hanging on actual towel bar in bathroom. No need to wipe your hands on your jeans anymore!
( FYI: towelbar is that thing hanging from the wall on two hooks next to the sink )

Twist ties, in various sizes, are grouped according to color, in the drawer sitting next to the duct tape.

Well,..tahhh-dahhh,..I think that about does it.
Oh yes,..if you need directions you can call us on our cells, or we highly reccomend you ask the gas station attendant.

Us ladies are off to solve the rest of the world's problems,....

We'll let you men get back to what it was you were doing before we snuck by. We were really only here for about 10 minutes,.. I swear!

Enjoy your day!



.....( the Ladies Forum has left the building )

P.S.
Oh and as a bonus feature we replaced your 26 inch tv with a new high tech digital flat screen ( mounted and precisely leveled at perfect eye level from your Lazy Boy recliner,...the remote is on the arm rest ) and your new 9 burner gas grill has been assembled and is on the back porch!

P.S.S. Don't forget to check the lint trap! Could lead to possible fire hazard.

Sooo,....uhhh Gotwood4sale,...notice anything new/different around the ol' place??????

( cough cough ut-mmmmm,.....see womens hands on hips,..tapping feet...)

Do ya think he ate the spinach dip?

Dear Gotwood and others,..

quote:

Where'd you get that giant sized Lysol?

As Martha says: Costco,..its a good thing! You can find barrels of almost anything @ a fraction of the cost!


Whew,..so glad you found those crucial, most important, pin numbers! What a relief!! Always glad to help. You mentioned " peapod" account.
Perhaps you might enjoy our ladies latest peapod recipes: peapods and garlic,....cajun peapods,..liver and onion peapods. Just let us know. We're here to share!

Darn it,..sorry about those channels being blocked. Wouldn't ya know it,..when that nice policeman came by about the noise complaints, he couldn't help but notice the flat screen being mounted on the wall. He eyes became glazed-over and he started to drool. He then, fixated and barely able to speak, using primative sign language hand signals, offered to help set the remote. ( How could we deprive him? )
Unfortunately, he musta' made an error.
Will send Woman's Forum, fast-&-furious-fix-it-team, right over. They should have it squared away in micro seconds. Our apologies.

Ears perking up,..did you mention irish music Riverdance?

Hmmm,....well we already know your stereo works,...
The place is clean ,...got a jacuzzi,( check ) grill ( check ),...& plenty of lysol to keep the annoying flies away from the liver and peapod casseroles,...( check check ).

yeap,...I think I see a merging of the two forums ( Men only & Woman only ) and a partaaaay comin' on!!!!

* Tidbit: Dancing always helps to speed up the drip-dry process. Kinda like killin' one bird with two stones,..( woopsie, or is it the other way around? Whateveeeeeer, must be those blonde highlights getting the best of me again! )

Woo hoo,..party over here!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'll make sure to tell all the 14000+ HSBBW people, that Gotwood4sale invited us!!!!
Smokey,..can you bring your band from above??

( Just as a precaution, perhaps we should put someone at the front door on spinach patrol? )

Is it possible Gotwood and SSmom are twins separated at birth only to locate each other thru the magic of the internet on the hsbbweb.

At the very least they must have had the same creative writing instructor in high school. Or could it be one of those multiple personality things?

Inquiring minds want to know.

SSM

quote:

Tip-toe,.. tip-toe,...sh-h-h-h-h-we're entering the MENS ONLY FORUM...ok gals,.... take your positions..... On your mark get set,..goooo!!!!!

" She Came In Through The Bathroom Window."
" Armed with a Bucket, And some LYSOL."
" She Didn't think, That a little scrubbing."
" Would take Her all that long."

" Didn't anybody tell Her?"
" Didn't anybody care?"
" Didn't anybody Warn Her?"
" You can't get the Smell out of your Hair!"
EH

EH:
I do not,
I do not,
I swear I swear,
I do not have,
smelly-smelly hair!

I only tip toed in to see what SSM was doing in here.

Woodman,
Your post was very very funny!

OOOOHHHH,oooohhhh, That smell.
Can't you smell that smell.
OOOHHH, That smell.
The smell that's around you.

Sneakin in places.
And you went and stepped in something.

The woodman is an expert in the field of well placed stink b***'s.
Being covert, I did not want to draw attention to are site.
By spelling word's like B***'s.
In case we have been infiltraited.
EH

quote:

Sneakin in places.

quote:

In case we have been infiltraited

Yep..you've been invaded....but just for a few minutes,..and besides, not only did we freshen up the place for ya, we left gifts & baked goods behind! Think of us as kinda in the same league as Santa Claus, only a Mrs. Claus version!
And not to mention, we had one heck of a partaaay!!! Nothing wrong with a little friendly infiltration to liven up the place, right?
Oh I forgot to ask, was that a " yay " or a
" nay " group decision on the drip-dry dancin', Woodsman? Got so carried away with my Irish jig dance, I wanted to make sure I wasn't breaking any rules!

....Well, we're tip-toeing back out over to the Womans Forum where we belong before we get booted outta here.

Will let you gentlmen be,...
all that you can be!
( sorry,..couldn't resist. That ol' military promo song just keeps rolling around in my head. )
Perhaps its all those multiple voices in my brain getting intune with one another.????

And just for the record,..if by some loooooong shot chance, The Woodsman and I found out we, yes in deed, were actual twins,...( hey, stranger things have happened- HA! Quit laughing hysterically!!! Come on now,..get up off the floor and back in your chair!!!! ) ... how come he got all the quick wit and brains in HIS DNA???

quote:

And send it on its way!

Ut-ohhhhhh.
I think I'm in trouble,....

( running for cover!!!! )


....sorry guys!!! Thought you all were trying to get me to read between the lines and sending me a biiiig hint!
Figured I had overstayed my welcome in the men's arena and had better get outta Dodge,..quick!


Have a good night & sleep tight.
( Don't forget to close the window & remember the fumigator is coming in the morning. )
Pleasant dreams.
Don't let the bed bugs bite.

gotwood, I can't believe after all this time togather, you decided to spell KRAK 'Crack' in your post title.

I take offence!!

And now I think I'll go KRAK my windows, as it's a lovely, nuke-free day in Seoul.

Your Friend,
Krak

krak
you'll have to forgive the woodman. i know he only uses one finger to type.
in the blaze of that finger pecking away he must have had a brain cramp.
it is a little fresher in here though.

Okay, what do you think -- I'm developing a new confection combining bits of dried squid with little peanut-shaped balls of kimchi. I'm going to call it Krakker Krak. I'm looking for reps in the States. Anyone?

What in the world happened in here??? Looks like a tornado blew threw here and cleaned us out. What happened to the "reading material" we had in the magazine rack beside the couch (and tucked under the cushions)? And the beer can collection......it's gone? And there seem to be a few movies missing from the CD rack?? And who in the world eats Pea-Pod Casserole????? Wha.....wha.....what happend to the Miss Snap-On Tool calendar? WOODROW....Did you give in and let the missus in here?????

Oh for heaven's sake....did you guys look out back? Somebody planted Geraniums in the Corn Hole game! GASP....the cooler is filled....with Sunny Delight. Ugghhh....the hot tub is now a flipping water feature with Koi and a waterfall????

Hey, has anyone seen my bag of Beef Jerky? Come on, guys, this ain't funny. I want it back.

Has anybody seen the Remote.
The TV's stuck on Replay's of
The Day's of are Live's.

Open up your window, let some air into this room
I think I'm almost chokin' from the smell of stale perfume
And that cigarette you're smokin'
Don't scare me half to death
Open up the window, sucker, let me catch my breath


Been puttin' that off for days..............

I have tried in the past to flush beef jerky, and that stuff does NOT go quietly into that good night!!

I've just got to know.....who poured blue KoolAid in the toilet and where in the world did those frilly things on the windows come from???

Krak - check the cupboard....think I saw some jerky in there....look to the right of the pot-poory stuff.

Ummm....sorry about the frilly curtains, guys. When I couldn't find my jerky.....again....I just got a little PO'd. I'll take them down. (blush)....I found my bag of jerky in my gym bag. Apologies.

Sheesh....I never knew the coffee cups were actually white???

quote:

I found my bag of jerky in my gym bag. Apologies.

Krak,
Are you sure it was Jerky in your Gym bag.
Could of been an old batting glove, Or GASP!! An Old Sock.
EH

For crying out loud, gentlemen, WHO keeps DOING that??!!

I'm Bad??

quote:

Originally posted by theEH:
I'm Bad??

If ya hafta ask, you don't wanna know!

Krak - What's gotten your boxers in a bunch?

Nooooo Woodrow.....I didn't say "bunch of Boxers" I said his boxers were in a bunch. It's a saying referring to.....oh, nevermind!!!

Beezer, you've been letting your pups sleep in my underwear drawer again and all their squirmimng around has my underwear in a bundle, duh!!

And at least one of those pups has breath that smells curiously of beef jerky....and there was a puppy-sized fecal 'gift' in my gym bag this morning. Thanks alot, guys.

It looks more like a gag fecal that someone accidentally (or not) backed over with the minivan. I hope it's not one of Beezer's pups!!

Continent? Ooh, tough one....ummmmm.....I'll have to say......DJIBOUTI!!??

Now that Woodrow and Krak foofified the place, the guys haven't been coming around much.

Sounds like a plan.