Advice please

I have been in this situation as a coach. When only a couple of players can actually play at the varsity level and you're trying everything you can just to be competitive. Tell your son to focus on the small victories within his own game. Is he hitting his spots with all his pitches? Is he throwing his arsenal with 75%+ strike accuracy? Is he working on mechanics and the mental approach? Is he backing up the bases and covering first as needed? Simply a glorified bull pen to live hitting. Once that ball leaves his hand, he is at the mercy of his defensive teammates. Let him know he is to be the teammate that he would want all his other teammates to be. Showing frustration to his teammates is acceptable, but must be done at the appropriate time (in the dugout or in practices and not on the bump). Other than that, there is really not much else he can do unless he simply stops playing school ball and focuses strictly with maybe a travel/showcase team? I wish him the best!

My daughter did this for 4 years.  High School softball team was horrible.  She was only select kid on team, and they had no pitchers, and very few position players.  She just used the time to work on her game, work with the less knowledgeable to get them better, and try and find positives wherever she could.  I won't lie to you, she came home angry most nights from the game, but I think it built character.  The last two weeks of the season she would just get happier saying, "Summer Ball is coming soon."  It even made her appreciate her time more in the summer, as it was so much better than the alternative.  Your son will get thru this and it will not matter in the end, as he still has options.  Just make the most of it.

Thanks Coach Mills and jacacatk.  Coach he has been doing that... Working on hitting spots etc. not much else he can do. jacactk he has played on some bad teams when younger. Ironically with many of the same kids on varsity now. He really isnt a whiner which is why I was a little surprised at his attitude last night. Really nothing out of the ordinary happened. Thanks aleebaba. One more week to go.  He had mentioned that he cant wait For summer team to start. 

First thing is first.  Tell him to not get frustrated because if people are watching him they will see it.  I remember reading an article about 5 yrs. ago that a scout wrote.  He went to follow up on a kid at a "prestigous" school and they happened to be playing a bad team.  The pitcher for the bad team was good pitcher as well and what he notice is he never showed his frustration while the other pitcher did.  That scout drafted the pitcher from the other team instead of the one he went to see.

Next tell your son to focus on what he can control.  Below is percentages that we ask our pitchers to focus on.

First Pitch Strike 66%

1-1 counts 65%

Strike to Ball ratio 65%

Walks (3 or less per game)

Thanks IEBSBL.  I will pass this along to him.  I know he doesnt throw a lot of balls, and only has 5 walks in the 6 games he has pitched (5 complete) Not sure about the other ones you listed. The one thing I can say for him is he doesnt show frustration on the mound at all and has always been complimented on his composure on the mound. 

You seem to be in tune with your son and guiding him well.  You may be on to something that there is something else going on - I don't know. 

He may also just be having a momentary lapse in a difficult situation.  Even if guided properly and going in with a great attitude, it can be tough for a teen to always have the right mentality, particularly in these situations.  Heck, it's tough for us adults. We have a senior on our team who is an outstanding player and competitor.  He struggled a bit in the area of being a good teammate in his earlier years due, in part, to his highly competitive nature combined with the given maturity level at the time.  This year, he had an amazing start from a performance standpoint.  But I was even more impressed with his heightened maturity and improved teammate/leadership skills.  One day recently, he took a big step backward.  They're teens.  It happens.  He seems to be back on track.

Like I said, it sounds like you already have him there but he needs to find that fine line where he supports his teammates but is also able to isolate some specific individual goals/tasks for each outing, such as locating his FB or starting the best opposing hitters off with off-speed strikes, etc.  This will allow him to have positive take-aways regardless of the game outcome.

PS - oops, started this a while ago, got up and came back and finished before I noticed the suggestion of specific game goals has been well covered.  Oh well, must be good advice

Wow, some great advice given in this thread. I remember seeing the story about the scout. Best of luck, I always want the parents of teammates or opponets driving home from games using my son as an example of a great teammate or competitor. I know how difficult it must be for a teenager who is working his tail off, but what a great opportunity for him to showcase his character.

We were in a similar situation 4 years ago.  It was character building and my son couldn't wait for travel and showcase season to start.  It was like night and day for us, and I really think my son appreciated his travel teammates & experience that much more.   

The best advice I can give you is that the high school game results and box scores don't really matter.....it is how he handles the difficult situations over the next couple years.   Your son seems to be handling it well.  High school baseball had zero effect on my son's recruitability.  It was all through his travel team and his own efforts reaching out to coaches.  Best of luck, and keep the faith.  I will say a prayer for you tonight, as I have walked several miles in your shoes.

baseballmom - Thanks for coming here for some "advice."  Doesn't sound like whining one single bit to me.

Our older son played in a similar situation in HS.  At times, I just couldn't wait for summer ball it was so bad...a lot like what you described.  He once gave up 9 unearned runs in a single inning as a sophomore...every single infielder, including the catcher, made a mistake in the inning.  It..was...painful, painful...PAINFUL to watch!

The good news is..the college coaches and scouts can see through this.  As a junior, our son was the lone non-senior to start...at pitcher...on "Senior Day."  There were kids in the lineup that couldn't catch a popup.  And guess what?  A Pac12 coach had come to watch our son pitch that day.  I think he gave up something like 7 or 8 unearned runs in about 4 or 5 innings...we thought for sure that the school there watching would be out of the picture.

That night, the coach emailed...saying how impressed he was with what he saw.  He said he saw a pitcher competing no matter what was going on around him and he saw the "good things" he was looking for...like a fastball in the velocity range he wanted and secondary pitches.  He concluded the email saying that he thought our son was a 'very good fit' for his program.  About 2  months later we were sitting in that coaches office getting the biggest offer he would ever get.

So...its not the end of the world.

What can your son do?  Lots of good advice above.  My advice would be along the lines of what that college coach wrote our son...continue to compete no matter what happens around you.  Don't berate teammates and don't drop your shoulders in disappointment or distress.  Demonstrate that he thinks, 'Ok, I'll get the next guy out.'

It can be fine.  Some coaches want to see your son in these types of situations because they know the 'failure rate' will be greater at the next level (a different college coach came to a "lower level" game specifically to see how our son would handle it).

You probably know all of this stuff in your heart.  Follow your own thinking about it and you will help your son a ton and things will work out.  

My daughter had a travel softball teammate in a similar situation. The kid was a travel stud heading for college ball as a shortstop. Her high school team was so bad she had to pitch for them. She wasn't a pitcher. Our high school mercied them all eight times over four years. They lost half their games by mercy. The kid never lost focus on the high school field. She came to travel practice and laughed it off.

I sometimes watched our games with her dad. He said the high school situation was too far gone to get worked up about it. He would tell me he was counting the days to the travel season.

Thank you all for the great advice. It always helps to hear from people who have been through it and come out the other side just fine.  It is painful to watch though.  As far as everything else, I think he is a good teammate.  He stays after to help other players that want to work on stuff and he doesn't show frustration on the field, the coach has said he loves his leadership qualities and his work ethic. This is all why I didn't understand why all of a sudden there was a problem and why he was doubting his ability. I did have a long talk with my son tonight. He is not mad at his teammates, he said he knows they are trying and he is just frustrated with the situation.  After some continued prodding it turns out a mom always knows when something else is up.  Preseason a few lists came out of the top players in the area. My son was on them.  2 kids that tried out for the summer team he is on and did not make the team have been looking in the paper( the paper only lists the scores and winning and losing pitcher, making no mentioned of earned runs or unearned runs) so these kids who he at one time were considered friends are using the results in the paper to kind of harass him calling him overrated etc. so teenage nonsense. I told him to suck it up and start developing a thicker skin because the more attention or accolades you get there will always be people there trying to tear you down. If you want it keep working hard and use them as motivation to prove them wrong. Things seem to be back on track now, but summer can't come fast enough but first Middle school ball starts tomorrow so help me. Lol

You sound like you've got a lot of it on the right track baseballmom.  Keep it up and keep talking to us...we are here to help!  

My 14 YO son joined a local/cheap 14u AA travel in lieu of playing LL Juniors this spring while his former 15u team mates play HS baseball. They are 0-8 and might win 3-4 games ouf 25 this spring. Simply put: they have 3-4 kids who have no business playing even low-level travel baseball and the rest are very mediocse. It used to frustrate my son, and his dad(!), but then again, only 6 weeks to go. He was working with his catcher/ing instructor who had heard enough semi-griping and told him to "mind HIS business". That is, do his job(s) the best he can do, learn what he can, and profit from the experience, because "winning as a motivator" to play baseball this season is not in the cards. So, don't let it diminish his development and enjoyment of playing baseball.

baseballmomx4 I cannot tell you how happy I am to read what you put and how you're handling it.  If you've read any of the other posts where parents come in and bash, critize, make excuses for whatever it can get pretty harsh.  But you have posted what this site is about - help and advice - not bash and criticize for no reason.  I think you're doing a great job in guiding your son to handle this problem.  Great advice from the people here and proactive approach on your part.

Baseball Mom and others;

Many years [decades] ago, I had the opportunity and honor to sit with one the great pro scouts in Northern California. I asked Lloyd what he looking for?

He said - I am waiting until the pitcher has the bases loaded and a teammate makes an error. Will this pitcher "blow up", throw his glove or "yell" at the teammate.

A pro scout visualizes the pitcher in the World Series with 50,000 fans and the game in the final innings. He is looking for the 6th tool.

Bob

Just baseball and coach2709. Thanks for thinking I am on the right track.  I don't make excuses for my kids, nor do I let them make excuses. I also don't let them think everything they do is sunshine and roses. I think that does a disservice to them.  Most people think its funny that the girlie girl cheerleader that never played a competive sport in her life was blessed with all boys and sports now dominate my life. I may have a handle on raising good boys, but the baseball end of it I am completely clueless. That is why I will be here for the duration.  Some really great info here and some very helpful people. It is very much appreciated.

Consultant- I will definitely pass that on.

I have a situation almost the exact same as OP.My guy does'nt get to high or too low over the situation.But I do have a huge problem on my hands coaches please help.My guy has started 3 games this year on the team he is on now.He has been left out there for WELL over 100 pitches.he does not have the luxery of someone looking out.I am not ready to blow up but at the same time if my guys best years are in HS i want it to be his choice and not someone elses from not being careful.