Best mound visit?

That is beautiful. Reverse psycology and sarcasm rolled into one!

son was on the mound in a 12 yr old game in the last inning of a complete game.....with 2 outs he had proceeded to walk the bases full....

sons coach called time, went to the mound and said the following....

"Nancy just called (his wife)....she just put a steak on the grill for me.....dont let it burn...."

struck out the next batter on 3 pitches,,,grinning from ear to ear.....

My pitcher just got drilled with a line drive off his glove. It was as they say smoked.He was not hurt but it was obvious it rattled him. I went out to the mound and as the infielders gathered around i said to my pitcher "How many times have i told you to charge those line drives" Everybody laughed including him. He was fine.

Here's one my Dad, who coached HS ball in the 1960's tells. Maybe its more myth than fact, but it's funny:

Relief pitcher is put in with the bases loaded. First pitch, grand slam. His pitching coach goes to the mound, says "Well, you're out of trouble..."

Something we had always done is give our players nick names. Every player on the varsity at some point and time would get one. Some would get one early in the year. Some would not. But the players got a big kick out it. And they stuck for the rest of their career. In fact there were times when I would forget the kids real name because all I ever called them by was their nick name.

We had a lhp who was a jr. He pitched very well coming up to throw for us as a soph but we could never come up with a good nick name for him. He was always asking "Coach when am I going to get a nick name?" I would always tell him "Just wait Pat your time will come."

So were beating a team pretty good in a non conference game. Were up 6 or 7 runs in the fourth or fifth inning. I tell Pat to get loose were going to let him close it out. He goes in the next inning and gives up a single , then a double , then another double , then a HR. I swear we hardly had time to get someone up in the pen before they had almost hit for the cycle on us. I go to the mound and he is standing there with his head hanging down. I looked at him and just said "Well at least you finally got your nick name Pat." He looks up at me with a half way kind of smile on his face and says "Really coach? What is it?" "Butter Bean, thats your new nick name buddy." "Butter Bean? Why coach?" "Butter Bean Pat." Why? "Because your a s s just got shelled son!"

We all busted out laughing right there on the mound. Pat would be taken out of that game. But he would go on to shove it the rest of the season. Starting in our first round playoff game vs the #1 ranked team in the state that year he went 7 and struck out 14 in a shut out gem. And yes he was still Butter Bean. Even today.

While I can't beat Coach May's experience...I try to coach a LL minors every year even though I coach much much higher levels, the U9's are the most fun if not the most satisfying. Last year we were well on our way to blowing a 8 run lead in State. I called time and got all players on the mound, including the bench. I asked if anyone felt they could throw 3 over the plate and my smallest least talented player said "yep". Hadn't played more than the minimum the entire tournament.

He threw one, a totally lucky throw low and away, ground out to first, game over.

He was the hero of the game, warmed up and threw one pitch. I told him he owed me "two" next season.

Better than winning the SOCAL Semi-Pro League Tournament in 1986!

Back in travel ball (h.s.) Bum Jr. was getting pinched by the ump, and was riding our coach. Head coach calls time out, strolls leisurely to the mound.

Facing Bum Jr., with his back to the umpire, tells (Bum, Jr.) "Let me know when the ump comes out to the mound."

Ump marches out. "Let's play ball!" Coach turns around, and in a perfectly calm demeanor, says "Are you trying to pick a fight?"

The zone widened the rest of the game.

In LL: I had a very intense kid on the mound. I went to the mound.

KID: (with a very intense look) What coach?

ME: Boogers!

KID: What?

ME: Boogers! Big green boogers!

The kid started laughing. I told the kid to relax, think of big green boogers and throw strikes. He struck out the next two hitters to get out of the inning.

Bob Gibson on the mound.
Tim McCarver catching.

McCarver goes out to talk to Gibby.

Gibby says; "McCarver,what are you doing out here? The only thing you know about pitching is that you can't hit it"

McCarver once said that Gibson was the luckiest pitcher he ever saw! On days that Gibson pitched, the other team wasn't hitting.

My favorite, just because:

Senior year of high school, son is throwing a great game in state regional final; 7th inning, tying run on base. Third baseman comes over,says a few words, and son gets the batter out on a pop foul. Next day, the newspaper quote, "Travis just said we've waited 5 years for this moment, now finish it." Knowing Travis well, I asked my son, "Okay, what did Travis REALLY say?" Reply: "He said to stick it up the guy's....and break it off, but we couldn't tell the reporter that."

My favorite are the over the top sarcastic one liners, generally more effective with older kids.

One of my favorites from a college coach...not a mound visit but a yell from the dugout to the mound to a pitcher that was struggling to throw strikes:

"Mix in a strike a&&hole"

Had a hard throwing kid who used to get nervous so I'd go out to the mound and tell him a joke. I'm not much of a comedian so eventually I'd just go out and say "pretend I said something funny and then get this guy." For some reason it worked. The HS coach never figured out how to get him to relax as "you're not throwing enough strikes" seldom relaxes pitchers but they must have figured it out at the next level since he made the roster at a solid D1 school.

I had one 12yo pitcher this past season that would get mentally bent out of shape if he wasn't pitching well. Knowing that going out there and trying to discuss the game did nothing but get him more anxious, I always did the opposite.

We had mound discussions regarding cars, music, etc. However the best was a discussion joined by the entire infield over who the hottest chick in the world was. After that discussion the pitcher went a couple more batters before running out of gas.

As I walked out to the mound to get the pitcher, our third baseman yelled out to him, "Bet if you had said Demi Moore he would leave you in there!"

My younger son at ten years old was invited to play on a 10 and 11 year old team. The team played up as twelves and was coached by a very good highschool basbeall coach. Its a different world from 10 and 11 year olds and highschool varity boys.

In any event my son was the starting catcher and we had some solid pitching at this age. Our pitcher started to get into trouble and my son stopped on several occassions to go out and try to calm him down and it just was not working. So the head coach was on the side line and had a " look on his face" that would stop any senior from a poor performance.

Finally time was called the head coach walked out with a stern step and I knew the pitcher was shaking as he felt he let everyone down. The coach raised his arms to call the rest of the infield in and as all these small boys gathered they looked up and saw what appeared to be a human with horns protruding from his head and steam from his nose. He took a look at each man on the bases and looked back at all the boys hudled on the mound. His arms crossed as he towered over the young lads he started to tap his foot and as a parent in the stands I could only imagine what was about to be said. Now let me add that this man and coach was religious by all means, he would never use foul language and I was thinking this could be the day the heavens open up and lightining just might strike the field.

Just as I thought the words were going to fly out of his mounth he reached into his pocket and pullled out his CHAPSTICK and ever so gingerly applied it to his pushed up lips. Upon completion he retunred the cahpstick to his pocket and walked off the mound as fast as he went on.

This is the kicker the boys stood there for a second in pure amazement and awe. My son patted the pitcher on the butt and stated common man we can do this. Each player sprinted back to their posistion in hopes of getting out of the inning. Thats when it happened. The pitcher stepped back on the rubber and delivered a fast ball that was popped up just in front of the plate, the catcher caught it and that was out number two, the runner on third had advanced to far and was caught off the bag out number three end of inning. The kids ran off the field and to the dugout with very respecful high fives and congratulatory pats on the butt.

On the way home I asked my 10 year old what was said besides the chapstick and he stated "Dad we didn't have to be told what to do we knew what had to be done and we did not want the coach to be mad."

I will never forget the CHAPSTICK routine as long as I live. I cannot get the picture of the these boys looking up to this coach and the entire routine playing out in front of us. A true basbeall memory.

I was a catcher so I've heard a few good ones

The funniest thing for me though was whenever our coach would come out. He's only 5'6" but he was tough as nails.

In one particular game, we have our ace on the mound (now at Creighton) and we're facing a conference school. Hitter comes up who would get drafted in the 1st round as a pitcher. Coach signals in a pitch to me and I relay it to the pitcher. He shook it off, so I gave it back to him. If the coach signaled in a pitch and the pitcher didn't want it, I'd give it back to him a couple of times so he would realize that the coach was calling it.

He was given clearance to shake off pitches so we went with what he wanted. The ball landed on the other side of the left-field fence. Out walks our coach. He walks out and goes straight to the very top of the mound. The pitcher and I had to stand at the bottom that way we were eye to eye. All he said was "sometimes you have to throw what I call" and walked off.

I was telling this story recently with my old baseball coach sitting right there. I climbed up on top of some furniture to sell it. i think he was a little shocked, but the rest of us were rolling!

quote:

Originally posted by hokieone:
My favorite, just because:

Senior year of high school, son is throwing a great game in state regional final; 7th inning, tying run on base. Third baseman comes over,says a few words, and son gets the batter out on a pop foul. Next day, the newspaper quote, "Travis just said we've waited 5 years for this moment, now finish it." Knowing Travis well, I asked my son, "Okay, what did Travis REALLY say?" Reply: "He said to stick it up the guy's....and break it off, but we couldn't tell the reporter that."

I showed this to my high school age son. He started laughing. Then he told me mothers would be shocked by the conversations on the mound. His coach's favorite is, "Let's beat their dicks into the dirt and get out of here."

Without a doubt, a mic'd Tommy Lasorda, pulling Doug Rau in the first inning of game 4 of the 1977 World Series. The profanity is unbelievable, arguing with Davey Lopes, and Nancy Bea's organ music playing in the background.

If you Google Jim Healy radio clips, you'll get the Jim Healy Tribute site, - this audio clip of this infamous incident is near the bottom of the page.

1 st game of a early 14U tournament, good pitcher doing good through three, up by 3. Gets a wild streak and walks the two next batters, next hitter tags one out, the across the state team lit up like x mass tree's and did a big show at the plate, congratulating the batter.

The pitcher watches and just smiles, 1st batter up, first pitch, nails him, next batter, 1st pitch, nails him, still got the smile, go out there and say your done, he says "just one more".

Cussing is never appropriate.....

Son pitches a perfect 1st inning including 2k's. Comes out for the second and starts nibbling and walks the first hitter. Coach walks to the mound and says "your f!#%¥ng arm hurt"
Son says "no"
Coach says "then throe the f#%£ing ball" turns and walks back to the dugout

Son shuts down the opponent.

quote:

Originally posted by Thurm:
..."your f!#%¥ng arm hurt"

Coach says "then throe the f#%£ing ball" ...

Sounds like you've done a great job of teaching your son how to interpret and respond to gibberish. Or maybe modem noises ...?

quote:

Originally posted by Thurm:
Son pitches a perfect 1st inning including 2k's. Comes out for the second and starts nibbling and walks the first hitter. Coach walks to the mound and says "your f!#%¥ng arm hurt"
Son says "no"
Coach says "then throe the f#%£ing ball" turns and walks back to the dugout

Son shuts down the opponent.

Bluedog would not appreciate this one bit.

Here's a good one about Brian Wilson:

Stanley remembers coming to the mound while Wilson was pitching for Norwich, Conn., and telling him, "Your shoulder is flying open.

"(Wilson) said, 'OK, but which shoulder is it?' " Stanley says. "I looked at him. I looked at the catcher. I said, 'I got nothing else to say.' And I walked off the mound.

Never coached above LL. I always went to the mound and asked who brought snacks? Most kids laughed but a few looked even worse. I then told them that they were still on my team and they were going to pitch next week if they wanted to. The only time it didn't work was after I went through my lines the kid still looked like he was going to die. He finally admitted that he had drank two gatorades and was going to p## his pants. I let him go and brought in a reliever.
I still haven't found a way to overcome that.

Son pitching with runners on 1st and 3rd. He gets frazzled and balks. He knows he messed up and is obviously embarrassed as pitching coach calls time. Sober looks on the coach and son as the conference begins. Then suddenly big smiles, a pat on the butt, and coach comes back to the dugout. I asked him what he said. Well, he says, I told him the only reason I came out to the mound was to find out what a brain **** really smells like.

Inning over.

Tommy Lasorda, taking a relief pitcher out, usually Tommy came out and asked if the pitcher was tired if things started to look bad. this time Tommy was coming out of the dugout and on his way, the pitcher looked at him coming and said Tommy i am not tired, Tommy then looks up as he is getting to the mound and said i know but your outfielders are so give me the dang ball. Best i have ever heard to date.