Expert: Just let the kids play
By ROB DUCA
STAFF WRITER
Bob Bigelow wastes little time delivering his sobering statistics. The recent venue was Falmouth High School, where he illustrated for a collection of athletes and their parents the chances of playing at the collegiate level. But his message could have been given at any high school or to any youth sports program across the country.
''There are approximately 6.8 million children playing high school sports in this country,'' said Bigelow, ''but a very small percentage will move on to the next level. Just so you know, there are 400,000 college athletes. So it's 6.8 million to 400,000. Those are your odds.''
Bigelow is one of the few who beat the odds. A graduate of Winchester High, he went on to play basketball at the University of Pennsylvania under Chuck Daly, and then played four years in the NBA in the late 1970s with the Boston Celtics, Kansas City Kings and San Diego Clippers. But his mission in high school was simply to graduate.
''I never thought about anything beyond that,'' he said.
Bigelow's harsh words peaked the interest of more than a few listeners sitting in the Falmouth auditorium.
''It spelled out the truth, and lots of times people don't want to look at that,'' said Jeff Hamilton, whose son, Jesse, is a junior and plays baseball and s****r. ''At first, I thought, 'Wow! This guy's trying to come off as arrogant. He made it, and he's saying that not one of them will get that far.' They all dream of playing Division I college sports, but that bubble might have been burst. It brought things back to reality.''
For Eben Asendorf, a Falmouth senior who hopes to play lacrosse next year at Division III Endicott College, Bigelow's words provided comfort. ''It made me feel good (to hear the odds), because I know I'm one of the few who will go on to play at the next level. But for some people, it was disappointing to hear that.''
Parents and aspiring athletes are now thinking of careers beyond high school at alarmingly young ages. Bigelow has spent the past decade giving more than 500 lectures on the need to regain balance and perspective in youth and high school sports. He has been quoted in Sports Illustrated and the New York Times, and has appeared on numerous national radio programs.
His message is as straight-forward as the title of the book he published four years ago: ''Just Let the Kids Play.''
''The horse is out of the barn,'' said Bigelow. ''The question is, what can we do to get people thinking of doing it better?''
Bigelow grew up in the 1960s, when local playgrounds were jammed with kids playing baseball and basketball and elite traveling all-star teams were the exception.
''Ninety-eight percent of the sports I played prior to high school were unorganized,'' he said. ''Today, 98 percent of what the kids do is organized in some fashion. There's some adult coaching or governing it. Adults tend to have different needs than children. That's where you start having your challenges.''
He said those challenges continue well into high school, when a parent who coaches his child throughout youth sports begins questioning why that child isn't starting for the high school varsity. Bigelow said many parents are in denial about their roles and their child's athletic ability.
''They think little Johnny or Ashley is a pretty good athlete and that they prepared their kid for high school,'' he said. ''So they say, 'What's wrong with the high school coach? Let's call the athletic director. Let's call the coach.'
''My parents went to 80 percent of my high school games and I'm not sure they ever said a word (to a coach).''
Bigelow peppers his presentations with anecdotes about his high school career and how his parents always brought him back to earth when he began taking himself too seriously.
He tells his audience of facing Lexington High star Ronnie Lee (who also played professionally in the NBA) and growing irritated when his parents gushed over the dinner table at Lee's performance against Bigelow's Winchester squad.
Calmly, his father explained that admiring Lee's talents was no sin, and that there were more valuable lessons to be learned on the court than winning and losing.
''There are 18,000 high schools in this country,'' Bigelow tells today's parents. ''Remember, what you're watching is a high school game. That's what it is. There are millions of them being played all across America.''
One of his great laments is the demand for specialization with young athletes.
''Anybody who played pro sports from my era went through high school playing two and three sports,'' he said. ''They didn't play on a million travel teams or start specializing in their sport at age 9. It's ludicrous what's happening now.''
Said Falmouth athletic director Kathleen Burke, ''I'm always concerned when a parent tells me that the reason to play high school sports is to earn a college scholarship. That's a side benefit, but's it's such a small percentage of kids who get one.''
In his 30-minute talk, Bigelow pleads with coaches to fulfill their mission, which he said is to educate and graduate students. He points out to high school athletes that they are role models for youngsters who look up to them.
''Showing those who come after you the right way to do things will be your greatest legacy,'' he said.
And he begs parents to back off and allow their kids to have fun.
''I've seen kids facing pressures that 40-year-old adults couldn't handle,'' he said.
Bigelow's delivery is rapid-fire, passionate and sprinkled with humor, and his resumé as a former pro athlete lends credibility to his message. But he admits there is a long road ahead before the current culture is changed.
''I knew when I started this in the (early) 1990s that Rome wasn't going to be built in a day,'' he conceded. ''It's a challenge.''
Times staff writer Rob Duca can be reached at 508-862-1177 or by e-mail at rduca@capecodonline.com.
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