brothers on same team

I have two sons, sixteen months apart. They have off and on played together since they were 4 and 5.

At early stages of development, we worked to ensure equal and adequate playtime at different positions for each, but when they reached 11 and 12, there started to be separation between the two. The younger of the two began to see more and more playtime on each team, while the older one became more relagated to spot play time and more benchtime.

This has carried into their highschool years. The older sibling (a senior this year) has developed into a pretty good pitcher, while the younger son (a junior this year) has developed into a full-time position player, with pretty good hitting ability.

It can cause some issues with the two of them (children are already very competitive), but all you can do is contiune to support their status on the team. Each child must recognize they have specific responsibilities and they are not graded on the performance of their siblings.


If you have one that works harder or seems more dedicated to the task at hand, maybe lightly pointing this out will help motivate. If motivation is not the issue, but skill level is, it might be better to take the approach that each member has a responsibilty to fulfill and the best anyone can do is all that anyone can ask.

NEVER, NEVER, NEVER get them to drag you into mudslinging about one or the other and NEVER, NEVER, NEVER allow them to blame someone else for their differences.

Remember this, at some point they will go their own ways. Help them to cherish the time they are together now.

Good Luck

What a great post, thank you so much. My kids are a year apart as well, 14 months. A freshman and sophmore, both on varsity for the first time and both having very different experiences. The older was considered probably the best player last year on JV but has been seeing less and less playing time while the younger has been moved up to starting catcher rarely leaving a game. One of the problems I see now is both boys losing their enthusiasm, the younger vows he will not catch next year nor during the summer. I think it is harder for him to see his brother not playing than for his brother not to play. He is not having fun and there is no celebrating even with hard wins. It seems there is absolutely no effort to consider famly dynamics by the coach and I really do not know how or even if to intervene. I am tempted to tell the coach not to catch my son but he is the only one healthy enough right now to catch the top pitchers. I can honsestly say that this is not turning out to be a good year for either them or me at this point when it should have been a great year. The fact of the matter is this is not really a team, this season has turned out to be nothing but a showcase for two players and building up their stats, that is a different topic though

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Had the same situation...Junior/Senior..

Would echo all cbhIII comments...well stated

Would add...

Siblings often have different skill sets and can excel at the same time in different ways...

...our two often competed for/at the same position and drove each other to higher levels and mutual respect and admiration..

...ours simply cherished ..were reminded and bought into the fact that their time on the field/floor together was a rare moment to be cherished...

...were each others biggest fans...

Our youngest was amazingly patient and simply blossumed into his own when the older left...watch for that...it's really cool...

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We have two sons, also 16 months apart. Older son is Freshman at a JUCO. Younger son is a Jr.

Fortunately, they are totally different. Older son is small (5'10", 160), has to fight for every inch. Younger son is a big LHP (6', 215).

They are best friends, and would passionately defend one another. Younger son cannot wait for older son to get home from college so that they can workout together. Older son is teaching younger son what it means to have to work hard and constantly strive for improvement.

This year will be the first time in 4 years that they have been on the same team. They do not compete for the same positions, so playing time will be dependent upon each son's performance.

On my son's team there's a set of identical twins. One is the starting catcher and the other the shortstop or err.. maybe it's the other way around, anyway they seem to get along fine.
They run alike, hit alike and have a lot of manerisms that they share. I think for fairness sake when one goes into a slump the other is obliged to follow, at least it seems that way. Takes a big hit on the team batting average!!
Last year thier older brother was on the varsity team (for the sake of confusion he has since graduated) In one game one of the twins singled the other bunted him to second and the older brother singled him home.
To make things worse the family name is one of those multi-sylable germanic mouth fulls that defy the average tongue.
It was great fun to listen to those anouncers with less than a perfect grasp of english mangle the name of the first brother only to have another go at it when the next one came up.
Rollerman

Will know more over the next few weeks. Older is a senior catcher, captain and what ever else you want to put after his name. He missed the teams Fl trip because of basketball. Younger son is a freshman who was invited on the trip. Won the starting SS job. They have been getting along great with both of them proud of the other accomplishments and while they are both very different in their size and maturity, both love the game.

Having both on the same team should be interesting, fun and the dinner conversations should be enlightening.

These are some very nice thoughts that have already been written in this thread

Mine are 2&1/2 years apart. The younger one played up on several of his brother's teams and there was tremendous competition between the two. They were also on several football teams together. I also remember how competitive I was with my younger brother.

I have 3 sons. The first 2 are 3 yrs and and month apart and the our 3rd follows in at 2 yrs and 7 months apart. Our first two have played basketball on seperate teams. That was an experience. We rooted for both teams. Thank goodness the teams only played twice. As for baseball, since they were in AABC, they were on the same team. Our second son played up when he first started in the 9-10 yr old league. He was a good hitter and a second baseman. Our first was a great pitcher and an outfielder. They both were on the all star teams at the end of the season.

During one Summer our oldest, 15 at the time, was playing on his high school's Summer league team. They were short a player. and since our second, 12 at the time, was in the area playing in a tournament, oldest asked his brother if he wanted to play. We agreed as long as he wouldn't be put in a situation where he would get hurt. We were assured that he wouldn't. After 12's tourney game he went to the other game. And since they, HS team, only had 9 players #2 son had to bat. The coach had already told the other that he has a 12 year old batting in the 9th spot. Anyway, when he came up to bat he hit the first pitch foul that hit an electric pole close to the field, and bounced straight back at the pitcher that hit him. From then on, #2 was playing with the team. And the oldest couldn't be happier. And even though our second played more than our oldest, he, oldest, embraced it and still is his brother's biggest fan.

Our third son has been on the HS team for about a year and a Summer. He never got to play with the oldest. Our youngest is in the 8th. He starts on the JV team at second and does pitch. So he has some talent from both. And he says he smarter as well. Youngest requested his oldest brother's number and recieved it, even though the uniform top doesn't fit so well. During last weekend's scrimmage our oldest said, "Doesn't he look good in that uni?" You could see the pride in our oldest's face.

We did worry about compettition from out two oldest. But, our oldest told his Mom during his senior year, that if he never got to play again that he was glad that he got his brother started. He really enjoyed playing ball with him. And he's at every game that he can be at to cheer is younger brother's on.