Buy in

What ever the philosophy, the coach has to know the system and be able to implement and convey the information effectively to his players.

The first step and most important is loyalty. Starting with the coach, he must know what it means and show it in his actions. I learned this years ago from John Wooden's Pyramid of Success. Go to
http://www.coachwooden.com/.

The information on here will help you become a better leader thus allowing you to reach the kids on many different levels.
Coaches have a tremendous influence on kids. A coach can accept this responsibility or choose to drop the ball, so to speak. Either way, lives will be changed.

Whatever your selling make sure you have already bought it and use it everyday. Lead by example.

Passion
Work ethic
Discipline
Determination
Desire
Loyalty

When they buy into you they will buy into what you are selling. If they dont believe in you they wont buy into anything you are selliong.

I can't imagine equalling out playing time would do anything but hurt your chances at getting a buy in. Nobody can ever get it perfect but players will buy in to a program where the players who earn the playing time get it. The talented, hard working players should get the playing time. The less talented, hard working players should get some playing time in the right situations. The hard part of course is the talented ones who don't work hard but don't completely dog it either.

There will be parents who have problems with playing time regardless, but the players will generally know who deserves to be playing and as long as those players are playing you'll seldom have any problems with the players.

Then of course, as noted by others, you have to lead by example. You have to be on time, prepared, and you have to model the behavior you want from your players. They need to know that you've got their back.

My take on it is that the program should come first for the players and the players should come first for the program.