Coaches honest opinion please

Man: Would you sleep with me if I gave you 10 million dollars?

Woman: Absolutely!!!

Man: Let's make it 10 bucks then, what do you say?

Woman: No way, what do you think I am?

Man: We already established what you are, now we're just haggling on the price.

We have had a flagpole, money for new uniforms, and about a 50 watermelons donated before,....but I have to hand it to the donor(s), no name was attached.
From the heart and with no hidden agenda.
Bless them!

If I made a large donation and signed my name to it while my son was playing, that's probably the only reason I can think of, that would make him actually quit.

( So if I win the lottery folks,..the new lights, scoreboard, jacuzzi, and bleachers are going to have to wait to go up in 09'! )

Doughnutman,..sorry I think you were asking for coaches to respond. I am not a coach, except for wishful thinking inside my own mind- hehe! )

quote:

Originally posted by Doughnutman:
This being the case, do you start a kid because of the obvious benefit to the team and the entire program? The coach that I talked to also said he would start the kid all four years if he got lights. I would think that the administration might agree with this attitude.

I love any donations, as long as they are made for the right reasons. Like you said, for the benefit of the kids, with no strings attached. I would never ever promise a starting position or roster spot in exchange for a donation.

First of all, it's not my money, so it doesn't benefit me personally to make promises that will hurt the team. Hurting the team will hurt my career, and my reputation, and that just wouldn't very smart. However, that doesn't keep people from assuming things. Any son of a large financial supporter is going to be looked at in a different light by other players' parents.

In your case, IF the coach admits telling the parent that his kid will start as a result of the large donation, that is absolutely wrong and unethical, and the coach should be fired. I doubt the school's administration would support this kind of behavior, and the coach's career will eventually come crashing down if he's not careful. If the coach did not actually speak those words, no one should assume that he is starting the kid just because his dad paid for the lights. There really are good people out there who will support a program for the right reasons.

We have a new program. Pitching mound thingie donated, someone is building a concession stand. Another is paying "extra" for an advertising sign. Another donates clothing and apparel at cost, so the profit is greater.

One of the kids hasn't got a hit yet. Another just got one last night. Two are excellent players anyway, and would start anyway.

I would start the concession building.

quote:

Originally posted by shortstopmom:
We have had a flagpole, money for new uniforms, and about a 50 watermelons donated before,....

SSmom, I hope you remembered to thank CB for those watermelons.......he worked awfully hard to assure that crop was brought in on time!



(name the movie!)

Let me ask you a question, how much do you pay for the travel team fees, Private lessons, New bats, Hotels ...etc each year while your son playing TB? I guess at least in the $1000-$2000 range. That makes the $200 donation per season for the HS team like a pocket change. Our highest donor only donate about $500 or less. That's I heard from one parent. He was stunned by the $500 donation. Call the donor a rich guy. LMFAO. Hey, please just pretend your kids are still playing the travel ball. Donate the $2000 to the coach and HS team, see what's the difference it makes. JMHO

BTW, I will not start the kids who donate the most at our LL team unless he is talented enough to be the top 9. Who cares about a couple of $Ks anyway?

Krak,......sound the horns,..send in the confetti!!
( marching band optional, but don't let me stop ya! )

Drumroll pleeease:

The answer is.......
Mr. Majestyk
Made in 1974, I believe.

Tahhhh dahhhh!!!!!

Air pushups,....end zone jig,....

( Applause applause,...please no,....no really I couldnt',....well if you must,...send the prize award $$$ to the baseball team,...just don't mention my name, -thanks! )

I only wish we had large donors that would step forward to donate to the team in return for a place on the team! I have found in our area the parents that do the most work and donate the most money are the same old parents that did the same thing as far back as little league. Strangely enough these are the parents of the best players on the team. And congrats to these parents that donate their time and money when they don't have the deepest pockets.

i own a small company in town,but i don't have lots of money. over the years i have donated over 30,000.and except for things i built myself nobody knows it. well now you guy's do but i know you won't tell.

i never wanted anybody to know ,so that my kids did or didn't do things because of it. if you do things because you want to ,there is no need to be the hero.

to answer the post.if we had no lights and somebody's dad paid for some.i'm sorry but he's on the team. if he's good enough he'll play. but he is on the team. lights touch many more lives than one boy on a team would damage. but that's me .

quote:

Originally posted by CaBB:
I have found in our area the parents that do the most work and donate the most money are the same old parents that did the same thing as far back as little league. Strangely enough these are the parents of the best players on the team.

By far, more often than not, I have found this to be true as well. Even if the parents of the best player on the team do absolutely nothing, the kid is still the best player on the team and will be in the starting lineup every day.

Our High School Coach doesn't accept donations for this very reason. The kids and their Parents work funraising events to make the money. If a Parent doesn't want to work, they can just pay the costs out of their own pocket. Each kid has an account and costs are taken out as they occur. All of the Players have to work certain events and that money is pooled and general costs come out of that money, such as field maintenance, uniforms, bus maint., baseballs, etc.. I like it that way and it gives the kids a chance to hang out together.

quote:

Originally posted by powertoallfields:
Our High School Coach doesn't accept donations for this very reason. The kids and their Parents work funraising events to make the money. If a Parent doesn't want to work, they can just pay the costs out of their own pocket. Each kid has an account and costs are taken out as they occur. All of the Players have to work certain events and that money is pooled and general costs come out of that money, such as field maintenance, uniforms, bus maint., baseballs, etc.. I like it that way and it gives the kids a chance to hang out together.

Yes, I should make clear that all donations to our program go through the booster club, not my personal account. It's up to the booster club to purchase what's needed. I hope no coach would accept any donations through his personal account.

I think it's a tough call because you have to weigh the fact you are keeping another more deserving kid off the team to accommodate the giver's kid and benefit the program as a whole which helps a lot more kids. If it's about the kids, I think you politely decline if strings are attached, but maybe you can appeal to the giver's better instincts, and of course make the kid a manager if he is really that bad.

20dad...way to go sir!

You donate for the benefit of all the kids and the program. It doesn't earn your kid anything. It would not change anything that goes on between those white lines for me. Any coach that would play anyone for any reason outside of who gives his team the best chance to win does not deserve to be a coach. Any parent that thinks that making any kind of donation be it big or small is a reason their kid should play over some one else is dead wrong.

So the kid that works just as hard and deserves to start or play sits the bench behind a kid because his parents could afford a donation? Are you people serious? Anyone that would entertain for one moment playing anyone for a reason such as this is so far off base its scary to me.

You play the kids that deserve to play. The ones that give your team the best chance to win. You get guys in when you can if they have been working hard and deserve some time. If you play anyone or start anyone because of politics you need to find another job. I dont care if they donate a brand new stadium. Either do it for the right reasons or shove it.

This is absolutely crazy. So Billy's dad donates lights and gets to start for four years. Then Tommy's dad donates a concession stand and he gets to start for four years. When does it stop? What happens when 10 guys donate? The #10 in dollar amount sits until he over takes #9 in dollar amount? Are you serious or is this some kind of joke?

Coach May --
I, too am wondering if those who write of "paying for playing" with donations are serious. Is that possible? If so, I hope my son isn't out of luck, since all we can offer is our time. There is a family at the hs that have repeatedly, and very overtly, bought the team things. I consider it an obligation to help whatever program my kids are in, however I can. We should all contribute for the betterment of the facilities, or for equipment. But not for ulterior motives! For me, that means mowing and weeding. I expect nothing in return, and I shouldn't.

Coach May:
I love your idealism, but in these days of tough economic times when programs are shut down for lack of funding and if it meant shutting down a program or taking the donation, I wonder if we all wouldn't think about it at least once. It's an easy call if you don't need the money.

Sounds to me like these kind of parents are the ones who truly believe that money DOES buy happiness, in this case, little Johnny a spot on the team.

It makes me sick to my stomach to believe (1) that a parent would have the audacity to stoop this low to guarantee their son a spot/playing time on a team and (2) that a real coach would even mutter, much less entertain, the ideal of securing a kid on a team because of Daddy's financial influence.

If I were a Booster club president and saw the need for lights on a field, I'd recommend that the club go to a bank first and get a loan. THEN, based upon recommendations of the club begin some fundraising events, etc. There is where Mr. Deep-pockets can wield his money around. IMHO

I could see it now. The coach finally gets fed up with little Johnny's poor play and benches him. The next day arriving to practice no lights can be found! The dad came in during the night and cut them all down and removed them!

Before I was a part of kids playing because their parents donated over kids that did not donate I would shut it down and seek a job at another school.

If a program is going to have to shut down due to lack of funding I would take that over a sham any day of the week. When we get to the point where parents can donate and that means that their kids will play that is worse than a program being shut down.

If a community can not support a HS baseball program and the county can not as well then shut it down if you have to. Thats a much better alternative than a program where who donates plays and who does not sits the bench. That idea in itself is a total disgrace to the game and the players.

Any HS coach that would even think of being a part of something like this is a disgrace to the game. How could they look their players in the face knowing that what they did on the field was not the determining factor on who played and who did not? How could they even look in the mirror?

And any parent that made a donation of any kind with the belief that the donation would result in playing time for their son is a disgrace to the game as well. Programs like this need to be shut down.

The mere fact we are even having this discussion at the HS level no doubt shocks me. For the life of me I can not begin to fathom the idea that a parent can buy their kid playing time over another player. Hell, for Petes sake please shut down these types of programs.

Coach May:

As I am sure you know, this behavior is not unheard of a levels at high school and above. I am just saying if it's between staying alive or not, the choice is not so easy. We have seen shut downs in my area for many sports even at the college level especially in the non-revenue producing sports. My alma mater cut 8 last year, and those kids either transferred or became club participants, or, and for the most part, gave up the sport.

If a parent offers to improve facilities so their son could play, I would hope that the coach tells them that it has to be to benefit all players and if his kid is good, he will make the team based on his own merit. That's bribery and doesn't happen frequently around here.

If a parent wants to improve facilites and not expect favors and the coach gives his son a spot for that purpose, that's entirely up to him. That's gratitude and happens frequently around these parts.

I have no idea what really goes on at other HS programs. Knowing many HS coaches as well as I do I can not imagine them playing players in front of other players because their parents made a donation. But Im not in those programs so I can not say for sure. But what I do know is it is simply outrageous to suggest that it would go on at any program worth a plug nickle.

How can you coach knowing that players are playing based on donations from parents? How could you face the players that were sitting the bench behind players that they are better than? If this type of thing did go on I would have no problem supporting a parent that did not donate in anyway possible.

Because a parent does not have the financial means to donate or simply chooses not to donate their kid is punished? Because a parent has the means to donate or chooses to donate their kid is rewarded? Man thank God I dont have to deal with this type of mentality. If I ever have to I will walk away very quickly. I will just start my own summer / fall program where playing time is earned by what is done on the field and not off of it. Anything else is a total sham.

There is no justification (NONE) for playing anyone over anyone outside of what is earned on the playing field. If a parent is so concerned with helping the program stay afloat then donate with no conditions. Why are their conditions if they are doing it for the right reasons? If there are conditions then they are doing it for all the wrong reasons. Extortion , Blackmail , Politics , heck call it what you want to call it. Once a coach gives in to something like this he no longer is the coach. The guy with the check book is. Let him coach the team because he already is anyway.

We have so many travel ball dads funding the teams that they want to continue to have control even at the hs level. They break out the check book under the guise of "I just want to help anyway I can." Then it ends up "I cant believe you didnt play Billy after all I have done for you guys?"

Please you can not justify to me that buying playing time for a kid is in anyway ok. And when you buy your kid playing time you are actually buying playing time away from a deserving kid that didnt break out the check book.

This is the most ridiculous thread I have ever seen on this site. I really feel I am out of touch with this site lately. I have never had to deal with anything this outrageous in all my years of coaching at the hs level. I can see why so many parents feel the way they do about hs coaches on this site if this kind of stuff goes on in their neck of the woods.


A kid would love to play for me if he understood that "You will earn everything you get. If you are the best option on the field you will be on the field. I dont care who your daddy is or your mommy is. I dont care if you live in a trailer park and your parents are dead as@ broke. I dont care if they have spent half their life in jail. If you take care of business in the classroom , take care of business on the baseball field you will be in the line up."

A kid would hate to play for me if he understood that "What your mommy and daddy do has nothing to do with what goes on between these white lines. I could careless who they are and how much money they have. I dont care if they built the darn stadium or donate money. The only thing that is going to matter is is what you do on this baseball field. If your one of the top guys you will play. If your not you will play as we see fit. If your looking for something to be given to you then go play where they do that. It is not going to happen here."

I am not allowed to have an offical booster club - president, secretary, treasurer, outside account - but I can have my parents get together and do fundraising and turn the money into the school. This year we are going on a spring break trip to Myrtle Beach and it's costing out the butt. I got the parents together and so far we have raised just short of $10,000 for the trip.

The first thing I told them is we are raising this money for every single guy on the team. You are not raising money for your son - you are raising money for every single player who is going to put on a uniform. I am only taking my varsity team (18 players) and my JV parents still helped out because I told them one day their son will be on varsity and they are going to need the help of a JV parent to help their son go on a trip.

I can honestly say I cannot remember a parent ever approaching me with any kind of donation and either saying that Little Johnny starts or implies that Little Johnny starts - now I am not that smart and could have totally missed it.

For myself I don't think there would be a temptation to take it because I don't care. I am pig headed enough that I am not going to allow someone to have that type of power over me.

If you are struggling with money they you are not working hard enough or smart enough. I live in a county where the biggest employer is the school system. We have one high school with 850 kids, one middle school and 4 elementary schools and no other business comes close to touching those employment figures. So basically we have no money in our county and every organzition at the school begs, pleads and hustles for every dime out there.

Our fundraising consisted of doing things nobody else does and provide fun things to do.

We had a golf tournament in december and still raised $3000 on it.

We found a farm that was turned into a 4 wheeler course and they gave us half the money for admission and let us have pure profit on concession - that raised us another $3000

I did powder puff football with our girls. Charged each girl $15 and they get a t-shirt and play two games. We raised a little over $1000 with concession stand.

One parent designed license plates and we sold them and we raised close to $800 on it.

We did a few other things to help out.

If you want money - work for it, think outside the box for it and go get it.

the fact that there is a discussion on this tells us alot about what is going on out there. Glad i did my time on the coaching front had a lot of fun but to think that some decisions on who plays and who does not is influenced by money sort of makes me cringe.

Will I think this attitude stems from the changes we have seen at the youth levels over the last few years. Dads start travel teams some coach and some "hire" coaches. The dads fund the team paying for uniforms , some travel expenses etc and then make the decisions on playing time etc behind the scenes. They basically have total control of the entire situation because without them the team is not funded. Then their kids enter hs. Now they are out of the loop and they do not have control. How do they regain that control? They break out the check book and try to buy it. They work behind the scenes with smear campaigns against the coach or coaches if their kid is not "on varsity or playing ss etc etc."

This site has become flooded with parents that believe it is their right to ensure that their kid gets what "they" feel he deserves. Then there are those that believe you get what you deserve through hard work and dedication and sometimes that doesnt mean on your terms but the games terms.

I find it harder and harder to read and post here without getting highly POed. But then I realize that many have not had the experiences that I have had and others like you. To them we are old school , out of touch , oldtimers etc. We are guys that scream and yell and dont give out enough hugs. I can not remember the last time I screamed at a player. Its not my style. I like to teach and encourage. I like to see kids work hard and then see the results of that hard work. I dont believe that anything worth having is given to you. I believe that anything you have to work for and achieve is priceless.

I feel very fortunate that I still have players that believe this as well. And I feel even more fortunate that I have parents that feel the same way.

Well, Enough HS baseball donations were discussed here. I will give you an example how wide spread these problems are in our education system.

My nephew who is a music geek in one of the Northwest region HS. He is very good at playing piano. A couple of years ago he started to learn Violin. He joined their High school Orchestra to play violin. Because he is new to this instrument, he is not very good at the beginning. So, he always sits in the back. Nobody even noticed him. After a year's hard work, he gets very good. But he still sits in the back. My brother starts to wonder why. He talked with the director of the orchestra, the dirctor suggested that he could offer my nephew more violin lessons. My brother fired their old violin instructor, any paying the director $60/hour for lessons right away. Within 3 months, my nephew became the first-chair violinest of his HS. My brother bragged all these to me. He says that he doesn't know whether if his son is that good, but he believes that money can do magic.

If a parent want's to donate, they should be able to without being labeled as buying a spot on the team for there player.
Some people are able to do that , you know "give back to the community".
I would if I had the extra fund's??

Those that would donate expecting something in return, Have know respect for the game.
Those that except the fund's under these condition's, also have know respect for the game.

EH

Coach May,

please keep posting on this site. I would hope most parents would want their kids to earn their play time.Work hard like you said in the classroom and on the field.I think the parents that are paying their kids way are only creating a horrible situation for their kid.
My son has been on both sides, and through hard work is an everyday player all through highschool. We havent seen politics the way some people have on this site thankfully. I just wonder what will happen to these kids later in life not having to earn their playtime?

I don't think it should happen. It does though.

We aren't in a position to give Big Bucks. I would hate to wonder if son was playing due to talent/skill or money. Summer teams don't give a rat's patootie about donations. Sometimes, not playing is a big incentive to work harder. If a player gets lazy thinking he can do whatever he wants to, then In The Long Run, donations are only hurting the one player.

I had written the same thing on another post that Coach May stated but decided not to post it.

I've been told that about 4-5 years ago, a parent of a band member at my son's high school donated a $500,000 semi for the band to use to haul all the equipment. Coincidentally, his daughter was named first chair the following week.

I just wanted to say that I didn't post this with the intent to slam HS coaches or give myself an excuse if my son got cut. He is only in 7th grade. It just came to my attention and I was curious if it happens in other parts of the country. I considered it a moral question, do you sacrifice one kids' spot for the benefit of the program or not. I would think that it is like the decision to start the better SS at third because you have a hole in the infield and you need the stronger arm at third. The kid gets less playing time at a position he earned, but the team needs him elsewhere to make the team stronger.

Coach May,
Please do not stop posting. I have learned an incredible amount of information about HS baseball from reading your posts and whenever I see your name I ALWAYS read them. You have increased my baseball knowledge incredibly.

When I left coaching I left coaching. 10 years ago I did not leave worrying about how much so and so donated who who did what for the booster club because I wanted no part of that because what people are speaking of on this site. Player A started before Player B because in my opinion he was better. did sometimes a parent get ticked off of course but the measure was always what the kid did on the field. The variable of who donated what when or where or who did what for the baseball parents boosters was never part of it and I wanted it that way. We were successful because it was about playing the game. Seems everybody is obsessed with new uniforms warm ups all the expensive training aids. silly me I just wanted the kids to play have fun and hopefully be successful.

quote:

silly me I just wanted the kids to play have fun and hopefully be successful.

Please make a comeback Will!