College Parents and Coaches

In general, I believe college coaches communicate with their players who are adults and not with their parents.

I dunno' rz...


(.02/wk)(52wk/yr)(4yr)=$4.16

Hey! That's lunch at Wendy's.

quote:

Originally posted by gotwood4sale:
I dunno' rz...


(.02/wk)(52wk/yr)(4yr)=$4.16

Hey! That's lunch at Wendy's.

You forgot to factor in vacas so I think that lunch will be at an IL White Castle

Since my son signed I have spoken to the coach 2 times. 1. Death in the family 2. Would the team like to have a BBQ at the house when they play in our home town

I did not talk to his HS coach.
I'm sure and heck not talking to his college coach.
Baseball and college is my son's business.
I'm just there for the support.

What's there to say?

I n 2 1/2 years I have only talked to him twice. Nothing really to discuss. Both times he initiated the call. Usually to talk us into letting son play Summer ball.

rz,

This is another reason that "over" marketing your son can be a negative at times.

If you were a college coach, who would you think is most likely to get too involved in your business... Those that simply provide information or the parents who market heavily and never give up.

That's why coaches want to hear and talk to the kid rather than the parents. If the kid is persistent... It might be considered a good sign! If the parent is persistent... It might be a sign of what's to come.

Not saying this is a fact, and there are varying degrees of parents getting involved, but place your self in the coaches shoes and ask yourself what you would think!

Parent's read what is written right here, it's important info to have??

I know it's hard, I've made mistakes as other's have also as parent's.
Let your son do the talking.
Practice it.
Prepare him for his first talk with a college coach.
And try to zip the lip??
I like that one.
I'm going to use it again.
Zip the Lip.
EH

PGJ, marketing during recruitment and contact with coaches after a kid is rostered are two separate topics.

As far as marketing a player, just go back and read what is on this site.....

http://www.hsbaseballweb.com/marketing_your_player.htm

"Ask college coaches who have seen him play. Whether they are interested in him for their own program or not, most will give a fair evaluation of your son's baseball skills. Again, don't base any decisions on one such coach, but each obviously knows what level of talent is in his own program."

"Now maximize his exposure. Write letters of introduction that are personally addressed to a head coach or recruiting coach, citing his conference, his record, and team nickname, plus other information indicating to him that your letter isn't a form letter. State why he is interested in that school and athletic program, which will set him apart from 90 percent of the other players wanting to play in college.

Include a resume with academic and athletic information and references, such as coaches, scouts, alumni from that university who can attest to his athletic ability and character. Send a game schedule for his summer team. Include an up to date photo which helps the coach evaluate his physical appearance and if and when they come to see him they already know what he looks like.

Also include a list of camps and showcases he'll be attending. Then send updates about how he performed at weekend tournaments and showcases, to keep his name fresh in the coach's mind, to show his persistence, and to follow his progress over the summer as a player. And don't hesitate to have him make telephone calls to select coaches.

Create a videotape of his skills. Shoot it from several different angles. Coaches also like to hear him speak, which tells them if he is confident, well spoken, and serious. Keep it under 10 minutes. Only put his baseball information on the tape. Edit everything else off. Make several copies, since they may not be returned."

************

quote:

PG quote:
This is another reason that "over" marketing your son can be a negative at times.

Thanks PG. This was one of those subliminal topics I felt parents should be aware of. We talk all the time of kids being open minded and going "outside the box" in regard to recruiting and choosing a school. Seldom do we speak of the issues that involve Mom/Dad.

rz1 thats why i'm so glad there's a HSBBW.
The more you read the more mistakes you realized you made. LOL
But if you get here early enough as a parent you can be saved.
EH

In four years of college I called the coach exactly zero times. We chatted at games mostly about stuff other than baseball. The coach initiated a few calls the last two years to lend support about dealing with the draft and everything that went with it.

After Josh's career was over the coach did comment to me that he appreciated me being a parent and him being the coach. Didn't mean I always agreed with him...

Rather than debate anything. Once again... Pretend you are the coach. We once had a discussion about "high maintenance" that hit on this subject!

I think the advice listed here at the HSBBW is as good as there is anywhere. That said, I would make some adjustments.

For example the time line has changed over the past few years.

quote:

If you were a college coach, who would you think is most likely to get too involved in your business... Those that simply provide information or the parents who market heavily and never give up.

I don't buy that one at all. I never talked to coaches unless they approached me even at the younger levels.
In fact I was in Charleston for 10 days and never even said hello to the coach. I was approached by the P coach after a game and he told me what his plans were for my son next year and just said that sounds great.

quote:

Originally posted by PGJ:

quote:

If you were a college coach, who would you think is most likely to get too involved in your business... Those that simply provide information or the parents who market heavily and never give up.

BHD says...." I don't buy that one at all. I never talked to coaches unless they approached me even at the younger levels."

** Same here **

But there are two discussions going on?? Marketing your son as a parent during recruiting and contacting his current college coach baseball related??

BHD, You didn't, and many on this board didn't. But there are many over zealous parents who make it their mission to live their kid's dreams, act them out, and stick their nose into the teams business thinking that it will hbelp the kid. Sad but true,.

quote:

But there are two discussions going on?? Marketing your son as a parent and contacting his current college coach baseball related??

Isn't there an overlap? You will probably find that the parents who hand held JR through recruiting are also the ones who have the coach on speed dial or their Fav5 all through their college career.

quote:

If you were a college coach, who would you think is most likely to get too involved in your business... Those that simply provide information or the parents who market heavily and never give up.

Not asking anyone to buy anything. Just ask yourself the question and whatever you determine is fine. Or better yet, why not just ask one of the coaches.

It doesn't mean that every parent who heavily promotes their son will be "high maintenance". But it really isn't too hard to figure out who the likely candidates are.

If you never talked to coaches unless they approached you, they would have no reason to think you would be too "involved" or be "high maintenance" once they signed your son.

Only trying to give another point of view. No one has to consider it or take it personally, but it's actually in the interest of helping. We have talked to too many coaches who have told us they're not interested in a certain player due to the baggage. The "baggage" can include many different things.

Discussion # 1:

Its OK to market your player if he has the goods, then backs it up, whether it be a Bio, a video, a letter, or even paying for a showcase? Regarding Baggage...

............Coaches have BAGGAGE also, and many troll the waters to see who bites the bait. You will find a range of coaches from forthright and honest to just plain LIAR. That comes directly from a D1 recruiter. I think the term "string along" was created on the HSBBW.

Discussion # 2:

Once the player is signed, sealed, and delivered, it is not OK to discuss baseball related matters with the coach. Let your kid do it.


Anyway, I recall the first letters my son received Fall of 2005, all from the South because he played in a World Series in Mississippi(against Alvarez)

They(18 programs) all wanted more information and some video if available. Would it be safe to say I was solicited for this information?????

Ther are many that know that I am friends with son's former pitching coach and have spent time with off the field. However he is an open door policy coach for parents, and those that know him know they can call him anytime, even if your son isn't on his team. One place you don't ever go, playing time. That just throws ammunition into the fire and what you get back is WHY he is not getting more playing time. I don't know any parent that ever spoke to the HC on teh phone other than to discuss injury.
From what I gather, if he is not recruiting a player and gets continuos phone calls, etc. he politely will send you on your way with or without explanation. I get teh impresion that he hasn't signed some players because of parents. My sons BF wanted his son to play at Clemson and made regular phone calls why his son didn't get an official visit. Unfortunetly, he finally laid it out for the dad (I have no place for him), who was very upset with his decision. That's why most won't call back, they just don't want to PO parents in general.

If that is not enough info to let you all know how some coaches feel, than I don't know what is.

OS, being solicited by the coach is different than soliciting a coach.

JMO.

I think some parents have a difficult time understanding the difference between "marketing" and "selling". Parental marketing is very effective while parental "selling" can be a real turn off. Generally speaking I feel as if “over marketing” of anything, by anyone leaves a bad impression with the consumers (or coaches in this instance). I've never followed a protocol when it came to talking to coaches but I sure don't think it should be classified as taboo or off limits. Granted I could count on one hand the number of times I talked to my son’s college coaches after he signed his NLI and got through the pro draft but that had nothing to do with whether I should or shouldn’t talk to them. I would also say his coaches have called me as much as I called them.
Fungo

They dont want to deal with parents. They will not or will stop recruiting your son if they get the impression you are going to be a pain in the a**. It will not have anything to do with how good your son is. No player is good enough to off set the pain in the butt a parent can be.

quote:

Originally posted by Coach May:
They dont want to deal with parents. They will not or will stop recruiting your son if they get the impression you are going to be a pain in the a**. It will not have anything to do with how good your son is. No player is good enough to off set the pain in the butt a parent can be.

So lets incorporate your term "pain in the asss" with the other term "baggage", and lets hear some specific instances or definitions of these terms so that all parents in the recruiting process can learn.

What say you ????

FUNGO....I think some parents have a difficult time understanding the difference between "marketing" and "selling".

Marketing is letting the buyers know of a great product while selling is trying to get the best price amongst competitors for said product.

There is a big difference between marketing and selling. I would imagine a coach has no issue with hearing about a player he is unfamiliar with. In that case it is welcomed.

From our own experience, those that think that every shcool was knocking down the door, not even close. Some schools my son was very interested in where here in FL, other out of state, never called once. Those were some of the schools that sent weekly letters and emails. It was son's decision, you ignore me I am not interested, I'll go where I am wanted, never once was a phone call made by us or him to get his foot in the door. The recruiting job was left up to him to decide and he based a lot of no contact on not interested. If he was not on some radar, yes, we would have approached things very differently, but in the recruiting process we made sure that happened (showcases, unofficial visits, camp, tournies, scout days, travel out of state) BEFORE he entered into the important phase. And for those that think it is easy for Florida kids to find a place to play and be happy in Florida that is not the case, you do have to look elsewhere. And if you are not a D1 player, and do not choose to go JUCO, there are NO other options. Could be why so many kids here work really hard to get seen from out of state. Ask some of the FL websters, most of our kids play or played OUT OF STATE.

quote:

Originally posted by TPM:

It was son's decision, you ignore me I am not interested, I'll go where I am wanted, never once was a phone call made by us or him to get his foot in the door. The recruiting job was left up to him to decide and he based a lot of no contact on not interested.

My kid felt the same way. All of our "marketing" to schools was done by request.

quote:

Originally posted by Coach May:
They dont want to deal with parents. They will not or will stop recruiting your son if they get the impression you are going to be a pain in the a**. It will not have anything to do with how good your son is. No player is good enough to off set the pain in the butt a parent can be.

I'd say if anyone knows this, it's CM!

The only time I feel a phone call may be in order is after a coach has called all summer and made indications to YOUR son that he is high on the list otmade calls to you as a parent. Then the phone calls stop. This could be a result of you or your son communicating he is very interested. Also the pre discussion on your part as to what you would offer, that seldom will turn a coach away. He may have no clue what he will offer until the time comes and discussed with teh HC, who makes all of those $$ decisions. He's just going through the courting stage. If it's about $$, then ask up right away and move on if you think there will be a better offer. JMO.

MY feeling is that coaches will ask to talk to the parents when they feel they need to---the young player heading into college is a young man-to be entering into manhood and needs his "room" to do his thing---if he strays off the path we as parents will hear about it from the coaches if they feel that is needed.

There comes a time to cut the chord---

Here is some BAGGAGE:

Mitch Mustain's Mommy Concerned About the Direction of 'Arkansas Football'
by CriticalFanatic | >7 days ago 12 Comments »

This is sad.

Parents for Arkansas freshman football players Mitch Mustain, Damian Williams and Ben Cleveland met with Razorbacks Athletic Director Frank Broyles last week to discuss concerns about the direction of the football program.

The meeting centered on whether Arkansas offensive coordinator Gus Malzahn will get more say in how the offense is run, Rick Cleveland said, and if it will be more pass-oriented.

The direction of Arkansas football? Well let's see, the Razorbacks were 5-6 and 4-7 the two previous season, and this year went 10-3 including a berth in the SEC Championship Game. Seems to be headed in the right direction don't you think?

“The reason for the meeting was very simple,” Rick Cleveland said. “We wanted to know what is the direction of Arkansas ’ football program ? Are we eventually going to get to Gus ’ offense ? Or are we going to stay with the way we are at present ?”

You see, these three players played for Gus Malzahn last year in high school. The trio of craziness was looking elsewhere, but following the hiring all followed their coach to Arkansas. So either, Houston Nutt promised them some ridiculous, or these parents are complete raging lunatics. I'll go with the latter.

“With our kids going to Arkansas, it’s basically like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole,” Rick Cleveland said of the offense. “When Gus came onto the scene, the very first question we would ask was, ‘Do you have full control of the offense and do you have full control of the personnel ?’ Which we were told, ‘Yes.’



"Our boys are used to catching 60 passes a year, They want to go to a college where they get the same opportunity."
Mitch Mustain's mom was apparently enlightened:

"It was agreed by all parties involved that the head coach has the valid right to determine the direction of the program and the manner in which the team would develop,"

Yep, lunatics. It was really a bad idea to run the Arkansas offense through Heisman finalist Darren McFadden. Who cares about winning football games. Man, what I wouldn't give for Bo Schembechler to be the coach of the Razorbacks right now. He'd punch the parents in the mouth and kick the kicks out the door.

Source: (Arkansas Democrat Gazette)
http://www.faniq.com/blog.php?id=1025#comments

quote:

"Our boys are used to catching 60 passes a year, They want to go to a college where they get the same opportunity."

Maybe a smaller less successful program would be better.

I felt as a parent it was my job to help him get in situations where he could be seen by college coaches playing the game. It was then up to him to show them he was capable of playing for them. When the coaches started to communicate with him I stayed out of it. It was time for him to do the talking. I offered him advice but never offered any advice or anything else to the college coaches. When he made his decision I supported it. Its his gig not mine. He is the one that will have to make it work. I will just be one of the people that will be there to support him anyway I can and the whole team any way I can.

I dont expect to talk to the coaches. If they want to talk to me thats fine. But I see no reason they ever will need to do that. They can talk to my son he is the one playing for them not me.

quote:

Originally posted by OLDSLUGGER8:
PGJ, marketing during recruitment and contact with coaches after a kid is rostered are two separate topics.

As far as marketing a player, just go back and read what is on this site.....

http://www.hsbaseballweb.com/marketing_your_player.htm

"Ask college coaches who have seen him play. Whether they are interested in him for their own program or not, most will give a fair evaluation of your son's baseball skills. Again, don't base any decisions on one such coach, but each obviously knows what level of talent is in his own program."

"Now maximize his exposure. Write letters of introduction that are personally addressed to a head coach or recruiting coach, citing his conference, his record, and team nickname, plus other information indicating to him that your letter isn't a form letter. State why he is interested in that school and athletic program, which will set him apart from 90 percent of the other players wanting to play in college.

Include a resume with academic and athletic information and references, such as coaches, scouts, alumni from that university who can attest to his athletic ability and character. Send a game schedule for his summer team. Include an up to date photo which helps the coach evaluate his physical appearance and if and when they come to see him they already know what he looks like.

Also include a list of camps and showcases he'll be attending. Then send updates about how he performed at weekend tournaments and showcases, to keep his name fresh in the coach's mind, to show his persistence, and to follow his progress over the summer as a player. And don't hesitate to have him make telephone calls to select coaches.

Create a videotape of his skills. Shoot it from several different angles. Coaches also like to hear him speak, which tells them if he is confident, well spoken, and serious. Keep it under 10 minutes. Only put his baseball information on the tape. Edit everything else off. Make several copies, since they may not be returned."

************

I'm not saying a parent should be out of the process because they are huge part of it but they need to be behind the scenes. Let the son do this work because it is his dream and future. He has done the work on the field to put himself in this position so let him do the work off the field to get the best possible school for him.

Now just as parents were behind the son while he was working on his game - encouragement, lending an ear, comfort and support behind the scenes they can still do that during the marketing phase.

I believe coaches look more favorably towards kids that can stand on their own or are learning to stand on their own more than helicoptor parents.

Parents shouldn't be out of the process but they need to be behind the scenes of the process.

Football is a whole different animal than baseball. Many coaches will make an appearance to a player's home to help persuade a player to sign on to their program by appealing to parents. False promises are often made.College football is high stakes. What goes on in the recruiting phase by coaches is often relentless pursuit that turns into bench sitting or a small role. A coach knows his players can't transfer and they are most likely there for 4 years and it's not unusual for high profile players to play smaller roles until their draft year.

This is an interesting and timely thread for me. It is a question I have been wondering about lately - to what extent and in what circumstance I should, as a parent, communicate with coaches who are communicating with my son.

I've heard parents here speak about calling coaches to gague their true interest after receiving a letter or questionairre.

My tendency has been to stay out of it, but to make sure my son was following through on things with coaches (send back the questionairres, send occasional emails to stay in touch, etc.)

As a parent there is always the reflex to do things for your kids. It is hard to resist, actually.

But I have resisted that urge, and from what I am reading here, that seems to be a wise choice.

My son and I were in the mall one day when he got a call from a coach asking what weekend would be convenient for an official visit. He asked to speak to me. He wanted to get a rough idea of where we stood as parents in the process with attending out of state and costs involved. I appreciated that, afterall, we would be the ones paying the balance on his scholarship.
After discussion on the way home, son decided that he was not really interested, and money was not the biggest reason, so he declined on the visit, which I know that they appreciated.
Sometimes you do need to get involved.

If a school is heavily recruiting my son, making plans for him to come visit, and the cost is 40K a year and out of reach, I would want to know where funds would come from if not given a substantial offer. Kids have a hard time with that, so sometimes it's ok to step in to ask questions, I see no problem with that. JMO.

Have to disagree TPM. They went to discuss football strategy. Imagine going to a head coach to discuss his defensive alignment, rotation, and batting order, living room visit or not!

I agree on your followup post though.......had similar experiences relating to COA and the fact son would be 2nd kid in college simultaneously. I didn't directly speak to the coaches, just educated my son on the financial aspects, then he called back.

Would that strategy include their sons? The article said they were looking elsewhere but went with their son's HS coach who had taken the job.

quote:

Originally posted by TPM:
Would that strategy include their sons? The article said they were looking elsewhere but went with their son's HS coach who had taken the job.

Hasn't it been said on this site to not choose a program based on a coach?

My sons whole life revolved around going to school and playing for UM. Everything he did he did with that thought in mind. He knew he needed to maintain a 4.0 for academic consideration and he knew he had the talent. They called the first week of July 1, the pitching coach was new and said he knew nothing about him and needed to see him pitch, which he did early summer. No calls at all. It was an eye opener for him, but he never called, he figured he needed to move on. Towards the end of the summer they called for an official visit, he knew he was their B or C list player. He already had other plans.

His school after UM was FSU, never a phone call, they were just not interested, period, he never make an attempt, ever, but he sure did let them know who he was whenever he faced them.

So why do some parents and players relentlessly pursue the school that has been their son's dream school even when the players is known to that program and ignored? Do they feel that phone calls will make a difference? Or why do some just sit by waiting for the phone to ring? When do you get the hint, it's time to move on?

OS,
Not going to get into that football scenerio, we have no idea what took place, and not agreeing it was rightr or wrong to visit the coach, just that football and baseball can't be compared, and football players parents are very often included in the recruiting process where baseball parents are not.