Did this coach go to far? Everyone thinks so.

quote:

Originally posted by ORmom:
good luck to your son-no offense intended but he's going to need it with your attitude.

Volunteers get paid.

I love it.

quote:

Originally posted by themez:
He is a fricking volunteer. He does not teach at the school. He is being paid by my tax dollars to coach the team. He works for ME. I talk to the coach on my terms not his. You do things in front of me or my children I don't like it you'll hear about it, I don't care who you are.

Let's assume for a moment you're right. So what? How does your KID feel about his up-tight dad dampening his chances to play college ball? Will you be in the college coach's face too? His boss' face when he gets yelled at? His ex-wife's face when she gives him a good hair-pulling?

When does your kid start being a man?

You said 1 athletic director, 1 JV softball coach, parents and coworkers told you you did the right thing. Dude, they told you what you want to hear. You did the WRONG thing, and if you don't figure that out I'm guessing your membership to HSBBW won't last much longer because your kid won't be playing baseball much longer. Wake up.

quote:

Originally posted by Bee>:
imo, son shoulda been confronted on trying to hide his injury

Sounds to me like your son is in the doghouse over not telling coach he was hurting.

Interesting posts here today, talk about coaches with different coaching styles. Anyone notice we have different parenting styles going on here? One mom doesn't know how to approach diplomatically and asking for advice because the coach is maxing out her pitcher, one dad asks if the coach went to far (but not asking if he did) because he raised his voice and "embarrassed" his son. There are times when a parent needs to speak up this was not one of them.

IMO, tells you alot about the parents too, one wants to think about how to handle the situation diplomatically and speak to the coach in private, the other doesn't think about it is angry and confronts the coach asap in front of everyone.

quote:

Originally posted by themez:
He is being paid by my tax dollars to coach the team. He works for ME.

When you blow a gasket at the game and wind up in front of a judge for disorderly conduct, run that past him one time and and then be sure to let us know how it works out for ya.

quote:

Lets see I have 1 athletic director, 1 JV softball coach, parents, coworkers tell me I did the right thing by confronting the coach first. This JV baseball coach gets the respect from me whatever he dishes out. He is a fricking volunteer. He does not teach at the school. He is being paid by my tax dollars to coach the team. He works for ME. I talk to the coach on my terms not his. You do things in front of me or my children I don't like it you'll hear about it, I don't care who you are. You think I'm any bit concerned of a retread baseball Coach.
Please!!!Coach the team. Have some ethics. Teach the youngmen with a good example.If He ticks me off again I'll be in his face again.
please

i'm pretty sure everyone who's done something wrong can find people to tell him he's right.
you trust your son to drive and do his homework? trust he'll deal with this as well. he should have called time and told the coach of his mental block. not ignore the man.

quote:

Lets see I have 1 athletic director, 1 JV softball coach, parents, coworkers tell me I did the right thing by confronting the coach first. This JV baseball coach gets the respect from me whatever he dishes out. He is a fricking volunteer. He does not teach at the school. He is being paid by my tax dollars to coach the team. He works for ME. I talk to the coach on my terms not his. You do things in front of me or my children I don't like it you'll hear about it, I don't care who you are. You think I'm any bit concerned of a retread baseball Coach.
Please!!!Coach the team. Have some ethics. Teach the youngmen with a good example.If He ticks me off again I'll be in his face again.
please

Scary stuff.

quote:

Originally posted by BobbleheadDoll:

quote:

Lets see I have 1 athletic director, 1 JV softball coach, parents, coworkers tell me I did the right thing by confronting the coach first. This JV baseball coach gets the respect from me whatever he dishes out. He is a fricking volunteer. He does not teach at the school. He is being paid by my tax dollars to coach the team. He works for ME. I talk to the coach on my terms not his. You do things in front of me or my children I don't like it you'll hear about it, I don't care who you are. You think I'm any bit concerned of a retread baseball Coach.
Please!!!Coach the team. Have some ethics. Teach the youngmen with a good example.If He ticks me off again I'll be in his face again.
please

Scary stuff.

I agree.

If so many people told you that you were right, why ask here?

Sometimes friends and family will tell you what you want to hear. I think that your best advice comes from people who may have been in similar circumstances and don't know you.

I think they said he was right because he is scary.

quote:

by mez: I'm kinda glad my wife was not a the game. She is 1 of those strong willed women that would have really got fired up.

invite her her, we have one or 2 of those

quote:

by mez: happened at a JV baseball game ... He has a mental block throwing back to the pitcher for some reason after the injury

some may also suggest that it's more important to work those issues out in JV games than it is to WIN JV games

quote:

Lets see I have 1 athletic director, 1 JV softball coach, parents, coworkers tell me I did the right thing by confronting the coach first. This JV baseball coach gets the respect from me whatever he dishes out. He is a fricking volunteer. He does not teach at the school. He is being paid by my tax dollars to coach the team. He works for ME. I talk to the coach on my terms not his. You do things in front of me or my children I don't like it you'll hear about it, I don't care who you are. You think I'm any bit concerned of a retread baseball Coach.
Please!!!Coach the team. Have some ethics. Teach the youngmen with a good example.If He ticks me off again I'll be in his face again.
please

Okay, you asked a question at the beginning of the thread, people voiced their opinions ... several (most?) of which disagreed with yours apparently ... so now you are telling us why you did what you did and that you will (always?) continue to do it in the future ... so explain again WHY you asked the question to begin with?

Our son is a pitcher and when he was a senior in high school, he was considered the "ace" of the staff. One game, he gave up some hit or a walk or some such thing and the head coach walked out to the mound as he so often did and started to 'berate' my son in front of God and everybody. The catcher (my son's battery buddy) always joined them on the mound and he would stand so that the coach couldn't quite see his face behind the mask, and occasionally would roll his eyes so my son could see it. Meantime, the coach's hands are going in all directions (generally you could follow the course of the inning based on his hand gestures), and periodically he would poke his index finger at my son's face (always a good distance away) ... and not once would we have ever thought to discuss this with the coach. We were on good terms with the coach and we certainly didn't appreciate it when he talked with our son like that, nor did his other fans who at times wanted to beat him up for us. But our son was the one who needed to handle it, needed to learn to deal with the coach (who, I must add, NEVER used profanity), and let it roll off his back. It started when he was a soph on the varsity team and lasted for 3 years, and I am happy to say that he interviewed his prospective college coaches with that in mind (actually asked them if they every poked their fingers at their pitchers) and ended up relatively successful when all was said and done. Oh yes ... during this past off season, guess which varsity coach was sitting down and asking his advice on pitching this high school season, asking him to work with the pitchers and talk with him (the coach) before the high school season started so he had a handle on what the pitchers needed to work on? At last ... being treated like a peer after all that finger pointing.

They actually do survive, even without parental involvement or intrusion. Imagine that

quote:

Originally posted by FutureBack.Mom:
... and not once would we have ever thought to discuss this with the coach.

I don't care who you are, now that there, that's good thinkin'!

FBM that is a great story.
Some of the BB people should watch football coaches to see what nasty is. They get mad and get in your face and then send the whole team at you with hard blocks twice through the team. Try having 300 lb guys throwing side blocks at you as hard as they can.
Being able to take a coach yelling at you is part of growing up. Doesn't mean you like it it is just part of the game.

quote:

This JV baseball coach gets the respect from me whatever he dishes out.

He's not there to earn your respect. It's your son's baseball experience, not yours.

quote:

Originally posted by themez:
Lets see I have 1 athletic director, 1 JV softball coach, parents, coworkers tell me I did the right thing by confronting the coach first. This JV baseball coach gets the respect from me whatever he dishes out. He is a fricking volunteer. He does not teach at the school. He is being paid by my tax dollars to coach the team. He works for ME. I talk to the coach on my terms not his. You do things in front of me or my children I don't like it you'll hear about it, I don't care who you are. You think I'm any bit concerned of a retread baseball Coach.
Please!!!Coach the team. Have some ethics. Teach the youngmen with a good example.If He ticks me off again I'll be in his face again.
please

We now move to the Ghost of Baseball Future. It's May. "themez" makes a post ....

The coach doesn't like me and he's taking it out on my kid by not playing him.

This has been a very enjoyable thread to read.

FBM said it best: They actually do survive, even without parental involvement or intrusion. Imagine that

EXACTLY!

I just don't think you do your kid any favors by intervening in this kind of thing. How is he going to learn to handle tough situations if you step in every time the coach ticks you off?

I think he got the message, because I have rarely seen posters so unified on a question as I have seen on this one.

Maybe his name is really Barack O'Bama, and he is just trying to "bring us all together!"

quote:

Originally posted by themez:

I would like to know how you feel about me confronting him after the game. Has a parent you want to go to the games to enjoy your son playing baseball. Then you see this type of behavior and it ruins it for me and my son. He just wants to have fun and play ball.

IMO - You sound crazy - and a little scary too.

I'm sorry, but I'm not even sure that the coach was that far out of line. To me, it sounds like the coach got embarrassed because he repeatedly told your son to throw it back to the pitcher on a line, and he refused. Like you said, big league catchers lob it back from their knees. Big league players also walk to their positions. High school coaches hate that. You said it has no impact on the play how hard he throws it back, which is true. However, if I'm a coach, I'd prefer that the baseball we play looks crsip, not sloppy. It doesn't make an impact either if kids sit on the field during pitching changes or even in between pitches, yet coaches don't let their kids do that. Not only did his coach have the right to react, he didn't do anything overly offensive. He didn't swear, and he simply yelled. I've seen coaches, to my son and others, yell at the kids after every play, and they only get better.

Themez, I just saw this thread, and I have to concur with the majority on here. You went about handling this the wrong way. I'll suggest you not have any talks with the coach the rest of the season if at all possible, and if you must, make an appointment for another day, and consider what you really want to say at least a day after whatever it is that upsets you.

I'm not a high school coach, just one of those summer travel team coaches. Regardless, I can assure you that what you did will give the coach the impression, right or wrong, that you're one of those dreaded "problem parents". Your conduct will eventually reflect on how your son is regarded, and possibly, how he's treated. In the best interest of your son, bite your tongue (I know it's painful at times) and keep your opinions to yourself for a day at least. Then, if you still think something is so important that you need to talk to the coach, proceed cautiously.

As your son progresses along, assuming he plays varsity ball and hopefully beyond, you'll find that fewer and fewer people will have much interest in hearing your views. Don't even think about doing this with a college coach. Your son is at a stage where people will expect him to handle his own affairs more and more. Trust him to know the best way, and support him if he asks for your help. Otherwise, stay out of it, for his sake.

Look out Coach! Here comes themez!

I sure hope not, RJM. I hope this kid is successful.

quote:

Originally posted by Rob Kremer:
Maybe his name is really Barack O'Bama, and he is just trying to "bring us all together!"

Hey Rob! You'll be happy to know Bum, Jr. is a flaming-Republican! He is representing John McCain in an upcoming speech to the student body. He has even coined a new phrase. He says if Obama becomes president, it will truly be an

OBAMANATION

Awesome! He and my kid would get along just fine!

(As long as he didn't shake him off too much, and didn't cross him up, of course.)

..and as long as Kremer, Jr. doesn't mind icing his hand after catching Bum, Jr.

quote:

Originally posted by themez:

quote:

Originally posted by RJM:

quote:

I would like to know how you feel about me confronting him after the game.

Your son should have approached the coach the next day (never after a game) if it bothered him, not if it bothered you.

Lets see I have 1 athletic director, 1 JV softball coach, parents, coworkers tell me I did the right thing by confronting the coach first. This JV baseball coach gets the respect from me whatever he dishes out. He is a fricking volunteer. He does not teach at the school. He is being paid by my tax dollars to coach the team. He works for ME. I talk to the coach on my terms not his. You do things in front of me or my children I don't like it you'll hear about it, I don't care who you are. You think I'm any bit concerned of a retread baseball Coach.
Please!!!Coach the team. Have some ethics. Teach the youngmen with a good example.If He ticks me off again I'll be in his face again.
please

I hate to say it, but I see a lot of bench time for your Son. Well...either that or he'll quit from being embarassed by his Daddy.

Themez,...you came here on the HSBBW and asked for advice. There are many who are taking their time to give you their best opinions possible.
You dont really seem to be " getting it " and that is certainly your prerogative.

You asked:

quote:

Did this coach go to far? Everyone thinks so.

Evidentally, not everyone here on the HSBBW, thinks so, and we gave our reasons why.

I do hope that you save some of these posts and should another situation arise, that you re-read them with an open, rather than a defensive, mind.

You said in another post this morning referring to your son:

quote:

He was benched yesterday. Good teach him a lesson no big deal.

Coaches don't bench players for no reason.

I hope your son works hard and gets these issues resolved and back into the game as soon as possible!
I would not take being benched from a game lightly, nor would I consider it " no-big-deal ".

I would suggest ( FWIW ) focusing on the ability, hard work ethic, attitude & mentality it takes from an athlete to play the game, rather than using so much of your energy condemning the coach for yelling at your son.

Us parents, even as old and wise as we sometimes think we are, still have alot of life lessons to learn of our own.

Again,....I hope things get better, I wish the best for your son, and that you get to actually enjoy the baseball season.