Do kids just make more bad decisions? Or is it me?

Its probably due to the fact that the world is much smaller today than it was years ago. We have information at our fingertips we never would have had in years past. Most people read the local newspaper and maybe caught the national news for 30 minutes in the evening. Things have changed in todays world. I dont think kids make more bad decisions than they used to make. We just know about them now way more than we used to.

Do you really want to have a laugh?Look at Facebook on some of these kids and there antics and you will really ask where are the parents?We also seem to be more anxious to kill the messenger instead of correcting the problem!People(parents) need to understand that we all care for the kids and your kid/ my kid has nothing to do with helping us help them.I remember getting spankings at school,from my neighbor and from my Dad and i deserved every one of them,thanks to Ms. Jones I went straight home.Sure I drank,smoked and most definitely tried to squeeze Debbie,but never was I as disrespectful as these kids are today,nor as lazy.Yes I am talking about my kids too,but mostly YOURS! Parents need to start making the hard decisions and that is simple-pick better Coaches(Ha-Ha)

(1) There is much more scrutiny. When a kid screws up, everyone has an axe to grind. Peers and their parents pile on to make themselves and their kids, respectively, look better. Media gets involved to sell the story. School administrators and coaches feel compelled to make examples out of kids. There was a time when much of the stuff that is now the death knell of a kids' future was considered "kids being kids."

(2) There is much more pressure. Kids don't get to be kids very long. Somewhere along the way adults started forcing kids into structured, highly competitive situations rather than letting them play and settle things among themselves. Nowadays, John is expected to get grades, prepare for SATs, do community service, be class president, and play 3 or 4 hours of baseball each day (and more in summer).

(3) There is much more off-line temptation (in other words, TV, internet, cell phones). The posts about FACEBOOK and the like is very important. Social networking should be a good thing, but it so often leads to very bad situations. Kids think they are free to do what they want, only to find that what they do gets out to people the kids never would have imagined would ever see it. It is dangerous. Cell phones give them instant connections, 24/7. TV sells *** and violence 24/7. The internet is the cesspool of our society. Kids have grown up in this world, one which is much more dangerous than the one we grew up in.

(4) We are all labeled criminals nowadays for things that were not criminal 30 years ago. Did you know that you can go to jail for speeding over 20 mph? For not signaling? For dropping a cigarette butt on the ground? There are dozen other such petty acts that are now CRIMINAL in the State of Virginia. We truly are all criminals now. And our kids are at even greater risk because the police seem to be hellbent on arresting them and because they live in a time when the age-old temptations can land you in jail instead of at home, working for dad for a month. A 20 year old college ballplayer has a beer one night at a party. He drives back to the dorm. He rolls throught a stop sign. He gets arrestd and blows at .02 BAC. He is now a criminal. A CRIMINAL, for God's sake. And don't forget--the same people who made these innocuous acts crimes are the same people who, at 18,19, and 20, were smoking dope, taking LSD, and burning the flag of "Fascist Amerika."

So, yes, kids seem to get into more trouble. This is because we criminialize trivialities, attack the "perpetrator" as a real criminal, then publicize the heck out of the "conviction" to sell papers and make a name for ourselves (the prosectors, judges, and police, that is).

If you drank under 21, if you smoked and dropped a butt on the ground, and if you, over 18, "squeezed" a girl under 18, then you are lucky you lived when you did--today you would be in jail for it all.

Don't forget that a criminal conviction will follow a young person into full adulthood. Drink a beer at age 20 and you are a criminal in this State. Do we really want that label on our youth? Especially when we know that 95% of all college students participate in underage drinking?

Many kids today manage to get through all of this through STRICT obedience to the rules. They are conformists--in other words--they figured out how to get by in this world early on. Many of these kids, and many of the kids we make into criminals with our laws and processes are nice, kind, generous, respectful kids. Sure, there are lazy and disrespectful kids, but don't try to tell me we did not have those characteristics among our peers back in the 1960s or 1970s.

You should be taking a hard look at your State and local laws and law enforcement. Let's figure out that it makes no sense to label kids with criminal records when all they are doing is what 95% of all of us did. It is time to tell the hypocrites in our legislature that we don't want the youth of our State to be labeled as criminals for life by the same people who did worse in their own youth.

There but for the Grace of God go I. We all need to remember this truism.

Go back 20 years to Alan Iverson. Go back 40-50 years to the guy that got married to his pregnant High School sweetheart. How many kids die in cars speeding or drunk? Kids today are no better or worse. Just more information and different circumstances.

We live in a society where 6 year olds are charged with sexual assault for "touching" a classmate. Need more be said? Oh yeah, and "conflict management" involves parents, counselors, administrators, lawyers, etc. My dad told me he used to "put on the gloves" in gym class, sanctioned by the gym teacher, of course. Imagine parents who believe "time out" is the ONLY way to discipline kids trying to come to grips with boxing in gym class to settle disputes. Kids aren't more stupid, but I think parents are. Yes, I am a parent, and I am stupid.

YES--the times have changed---the kids today are making the same decisions we did at their age but now everybody knows about it

Things I did as a coach 10/20 years ago could get me locked up today

TRHit--Exactly right. As a parent, disciplining my children even 15 years ago, I was in a position of choosing between what I thought was proper (God given and God directed) discipline with the risk of going to jail and weak discipline and with no risk of jail. I could not risk letting my kids go into foster care to be abused wards of the State, so I refrained from the proper discipline.

We have to wake up as parents and citizens and roll back the bourgeoning police state. Spitting on the sidewalk and tossing cigarette butts may be crude behavior, and yes, we can all do better, but is it something that we want to CRIMINALIZE? Do we want to put a 20 year old in jail for drinking a beer? It is insane, folks, to put so many decent people on a criminal path just because the State wants to control its populace. And again, these are the same cretins who brought us ***, drugs and rock and roll.

These are all tough questions to answer.

Should there be zero tolerance for alcohol use? drinking and driving? speeding?

I personally think it is appalling that colleges allow underage drinking as they do...that and there is a group of parents who take a "i did it" - "kids will be kids" attitude.


I do think when some commit violent crimes there was usually some warning sign in their past that someone may have ignored.

Example is the UVA kid that just killed the young lady...i am guessing there was some situation where it was clear he had a violent tendancy and it went unchecked.

Here was a pretty funny e-mail someone sent me it would fit here.

HIGH SCHOOL -- 1950s vs. 2010

Scenario 1:
Jack goes quail hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck's gun rack.
1950s - Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2010 - School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario 2:
Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.
1950s - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2010 - Police called and SWAT team arrives -- they arrest both Johnny and Mark. They are both charged with assault and both expelled even though Johnny started it.


Scenario 3:
Jeffrey will not be still in class, he disrupts other students.
1950s - Jeffrey sent to the Principal's office and given a good paddling by the Principal. He then returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2010 - Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. He becomes a zombie. He is then tested for ADD. The school gets extra money from the state because Jeffrey has a disability.

Scenario 4:
Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt. Billy must do chores to earn the money to pay for the window.
1950s - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college and becomes a responsible, successful businessman.
2010 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. The state psychologist is told by Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has an affair with the psychologist.


Scenario 5:
Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1950s - Mark shares his aspirin with the Principal out on the smoking dock.
2010 - The police are called and Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. His car is then searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario 6:
Pedro fails high school English.
1950s - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.
2010 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against the state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English is then banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given his diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario 7:
Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the Fourth of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up a red ant bed.
1950s - Ants die.
2010 - ATF, Homeland Security and the FBI are all called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates his parents -- and all siblings are removed from their home and all computers are confiscated. Johnny's dad is placed on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario 8:
Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1950s - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2010 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.

Funny how things change.

Mr & Mrs BHD were perfect Atheist parents.

quote:

(1) There is much more scrutiny. When a kid screws up, everyone has an axe to grind. Peers and their parents pile on to make themselves and their kids, respectively, look better. Media gets involved to sell the story. School administrators and coaches feel compelled to make examples out of kids. There was a time when much of the stuff that is now the death knell of a kids' future was considered "kids being kids."

(2) There is much more pressure. Kids don't get to be kids very long. Somewhere along the way adults started forcing kids into structured, highly competitive situations rather than letting them play and settle things among themselves. Nowadays, John is expected to get grades, prepare for SATs, do community service, be class president, and play 3 or 4 hours of baseball each day (and more in summer).

(3) There is much more off-line temptation (in other words, TV, internet, cell phones). The posts about FACEBOOK and the like is very important. Social networking should be a good thing, but it so often leads to very bad situations. Kids think they are free to do what they want, only to find that what they do gets out to people the kids never would have imagined would ever see it. It is dangerous. Cell phones give them instant connections, 24/7. TV sells *** and violence 24/7. The internet is the cesspool of our society. Kids have grown up in this world, one which is much more dangerous than the one we grew up in.

(4) We are all labeled criminals nowadays for things that were not criminal 30 years ago. Did you know that you can go to jail for speeding over 20 mph? For not signaling? For dropping a cigarette butt on the ground? There are dozen other such petty acts that are now CRIMINAL in the State of Virginia. We truly are all criminals now. And our kids are at even greater risk because the police seem to be hellbent on arresting them and because they live in a time when the age-old temptations can land you in jail instead of at home, working for dad for a month. A 20 year old college ballplayer has a beer one night at a party. He drives back to the dorm. He rolls throught a stop sign. He gets arrestd and blows at .02 BAC. He is now a criminal. A CRIMINAL, for God's sake. And don't forget--the same people who made these innocuous acts crimes are the same people who, at 18,19, and 20, were smoking dope, taking LSD, and burning the flag of "Fascist Amerika."

So, yes, kids seem to get into more trouble. This is because we criminialize trivialities, attack the "perpetrator" as a real criminal, then publicize the heck out of the "conviction" to sell papers and make a name for ourselves (the prosectors, judges, and police, that is).

If you drank under 21, if you smoked and dropped a butt on the ground, and if you, over 18, "squeezed" a girl under 18, then you are lucky you lived when you did--today you would be in jail for it all.

Don't forget that a criminal conviction will follow a young person into full adulthood. Drink a beer at age 20 and you are a criminal in this State. Do we really want that label on our youth? Especially when we know that 95% of all college students participate in underage drinking?

Many kids today manage to get through all of this through STRICT obedience to the rules. They are conformists--in other words--they figured out how to get by in this world early on. Many of these kids, and many of the kids we make into criminals with our laws and processes are nice, kind, generous, respectful kids. Sure, there are lazy and disrespectful kids, but don't try to tell me we did not have those characteristics among our peers back in the 1960s or 1970s.

You should be taking a hard look at your State and local laws and law enforcement. Let's figure out that it makes no sense to label kids with criminal records when all they are doing is what 95% of all of us did. It is time to tell the hypocrites in our legislature that we don't want the youth of our State to be labeled as criminals for life by the same people who did worse in their own youth.

There but for the Grace of God go I. We all need to remember this truism.

RHOBBS,

AMEN Brother, great post!!! We also need to not only talk to our kids, but listen to them. My son has been told about all of the antics that I got away with, but I also told him that he has to be more careful than I was due to the times.