Got THE call

quote:

Originally posted by HeyBatter:
Well, just got the call today. Upon preparing to return for his sophomore college year, my son has decided to hang 'em up. Can't explain it, but the old "feeling" just isn't there anymore for him.

I can't thank him enough for all the good times and all the memories.

That must hurt you some. Was your son a very good ballplayer?

Sorry to hear that HeyBatter, but as we all know everyone hangs them up someday.

All the more reason we all need to enjoy it while we can.

Thanks for sharing, all will be fine...even for Mom and Dad with alittle time.

Heybatter,

We will ALL get that call at some point with our boys and their baseball. All I can say is I hope I handle it with the same calm and sensibility that you seem to possess. Congrats to your son for making it to the collegiate playing field...and congrats to you for being such a supportive dad! Thanks for giving us a reminder to enjoy each and every minute.

HeyBatter:

I'm sorry to hear about your son's decision...I admire you for starting this thread...it could not have been easy.

As usual, on this site, you are receiving good advice...luvbb has said it much better than I could have and I agree with her completely.

This is a situation that occurs often...but probably isn't discussed much...again, thanks for sharing.

At some point do you think your son would read this thread and respond with his thoughts? There was a thread similar to this one last summer or early fall.

There was alot of discussion concerning burnout...and there was certainly no consensus regarding the topic.

I found the topic to be quite interesting.

Please keep us posted HeyBatter.

I wish my son would go fishing with me. He doesn't because he devotes most of his time to baseball. I think back of the many good times we had fishing together when he was younger. We also spent a lot of time together chasing his dream of baseball. While both are great activities for bringing parents and sons together, we both know baseballs and boats are not necessary for happiness.
Fungo

HeyBatter:

I'm sorry to hear about your son's decision...I admire you for sharing this...it could not have been easy. It may help to sit back and just respect his decision. My son quit summer ball last year after the first two weeks and took a job at Best Buy in town here. My wife and I were besides ourselves at his decision to throw this opportunity away!!! He had a good summer with his friends then three weeks before school started dusted off his equipment and started back up. School started and he feels he needed the time off as it was just too demanding with school, practice, friends, community work, training, on and on... Now he is back 24/7 Hang in there he may just need a break.
Steve

Fungo you've reminded me of something. I don't know how many times I've said it... even on here... THERE ARE MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THINGS THAN BASEBALL! The most important of those things is HAPPINESS.

HeyBatter,

I sincerely hope your son ends up with much happiness and many fond memories about baseball. Some day he might have a son and that's when he will most appreciate good old Dad, more than ever.

Hope you don't hang it up here because you can help many people by sticking around. You are now part of the majority! Everyone will be joining you at some point.

Congratulation to you and your son for having all those good times and memories. Sounds like a big success to me!

Hey Batter,

I am going to speak from the heart. I will be devastated when I get that call, but understand the "life goes on philosophy" as I am sure you do. Right now it hurts however. For what its worth, I feel bad for you but if I were to get the call today - I would be thinking about all those memories with some sorrow yet with a smile in my heart as well

I also love the idea of thanking him for the memories. These are treasures - provided by your son - that only baseball parents can enjoy.

When he was 91 years old, the great Bob Hope returned to Cleveland to sing the classic "Thanks for the Memories" when they closed old Cleveland Stadium. It is times like these that remind of that song.

Thanks to you all for your kind words and thoughts. I thought this site was the greatest when I first stumbled upon it many years ago when my son was just starting high school. I always found just amazing advice when I came here and it helped me help my son follow his dream to play college ball and he reached that dream.

Whether he'll have a change of heart or this really is it, well the end comes some day in every endeavor. Sooooooo much positive has come from his baseball experience and before it were take a negative turn, if that is where his heart was headin, it is best to put on the brakes here and with nothing but great memories.

I have to admit to being quite sad and a bit surprised by the timing, but he's a great kid and I trust his judgment and he feels he needs to do this and I am so very happy for him for the career he has had and the point he reached in baseball and where his baseball talents helped him go (travel teams, club teams, high school playoffs, showcases, all league etc. etc.-so many wonderful people we've met and admittance to a wonderful college).

As someone posted above, my hope is that you'll all enjoy every moment you get and as someone else pointed out, we all get this call someday, at some point.

It is a sad day, but hopefully a great beginning and new adventures and I sure plan to stick around here. Heck, we still love baseball and I hope I can share a thought or information here so others can have the same amazing experience we've had.

From t-ball, through little league, travel teams, scout teams, winter ball, summer ball, high school, the recruiting process and to college, wow, what a ride.
I wouldn't trade anything for the memory I'll always have of his first college at bat, a double off the centerfield fence. But hey, still a long way in life to go and hoping for lots of good stuff still ahead.

thanks again for all your good thoughts and best wishes and happy new year (and you'll still have me to kick around here )

Thank you HeyBatter for the thread and the reminder to always enjoy the moment. I wish you & your son the very best.

Hey Batter:

It's a tough call for your son to make, baseball has been a major part of his life for so long. But I'm sure you are proud of the fact he was able to recognize that he wanted to do something else it takes a man to look into himself and know what he wants.

I am sure I speak for you as well as others on this site, we love our sons and baseball is part of their lives not life itself. Our sons are more important to us as our sons rather than ball players. Good luck.

HeyBatter...your post reminded me.....that if it were to end tomorrow.....we have had a wonderful time....

Best wishes to you and your son....

HeyBatter,

When I found this site, you were one of the first posters to welcome me (doubt you even remember that). I think we also probably sat at the same ballpark in Palo Alto a couple of summers ago...not knowing each other was there. Kind of weird how I've never met you...but always felt a kind of warmth from your posts.

So since we kind of grew up together on this site...your wonderful and open post hits a little deeper with me than previous others reaching the same point. I know it must be a bit tough today...probably was even tougher for your son to call you. But you, as always, have things in a very good perspective. I really admire that. And I know your son has and will continue to benefit greatly from your mentorship and the role model you are.

Thank you for welcoming me to this site...and thank you for being so open at this time. I hope you continue to post...and I hope next time we're in the same ballpark, we somehow run into each other.

All the best!

He went out on his own terms. I don't know if that's as bad as still wanting to play and everyone else telling you you're done

Heybatter,

Thank you for your honesty all these years. I wish the best for your son and hope you stick around this place.

I am sure your son will take the many great lessons he learned through baseball and apply them in his new endeavors successfully.

HeyBatter,

ya raise 'em up to think on their own, then when they do ya wonder "what are they thinking"?


seriously tho, I (and others) should remember your additude when our call comes -

Thanks


btw, your HSweb membership is a lifetime one
.

heybatter -

Others have said it much more eloquently than I, but thanks from me for your continued insights during a tough time. You are a classy guy. How is your son doing?

HeyBatter,

Once I get past the surprize and sadness associated with your son's decision, I'm taken straight to the opportunities it presents for him. This came to me like a "ton of bricks" last year when a long-time playing partner of my son's (back to the 8th grade) came to the same conclusion and left UNC's team to concentrate more on college and his future beyond it.

As I sat there and thought about the young man at the time, I found myself increasingly excited for him. He's smart, personable, and...through baseball...shown that he has the energy and fortitude to succeed. What he'd come to realize was that, if he could re-direct the energy that he'd been applying to baseball toward other pursuits, he'd greatly enhance his opportunity to succeed past baseball. Meanwhile, he'll always love and appreciate baseball; only in a different way.

So, I find myself similarly excited for your son and his prospects. "Hats off to him" for for coming to what had to have been a tough decision, and all the best to him...and you...in the future!

Hey Batter, I too, appreciate your sharing your and son's story with us. I will remember to soak in every minute I can this spring when I think of your post.

However, like has been said - may he make the most out of his decision and the other opportunities that are in his future. Best of luck to him!

Thank you for sharing your story. It puts into perspective that our boys baseball "careers" can end at any time for any reason. Makes every moment they play all that much appreciated.

Best of luck to him!

HeyBatter...I, too, got that dreaded call from my older son playing in the Mets minor league system years ago. Not that he quit, but rather that he was released.

Would like to hear some stories of recently drafted players getting released after their first season. Any out there?

I would suppose that it is better that your son was able to make his own decision rather than a coach or a general manager making it for him.

When I was called into the General Manager's office years ago, it wasn't pretty.

My younger sophomore son, hopes to get a chance to play at the next level, but if he doesn't, he knows that he'll be working on his MBA at Wharton, Harvard or Stanford; and, then, making six figures out of school instead of $1000.00 a month for 3 months buried in some short season league; and, working at the White Hen or 7-11 or Wal-Mart in the off season.

Many, many, many, many are called.

Few are chosen.

Still fewer play in The Show.

Hey Batter
Thank you for the wake-up call...you have touched many parents in different ways with your comments.
For me, I can be a bit too overboard with "constructive criticism" of my two sons in sports. Last night, I sat them both down and told them how very proud I was and how much happiness they bring me with their athletic and other efforts (even though I don't show it well at times). I caught my 15 yr old by surprise...I could tell it meant alot to him for me to say that. Thanks Hey Batter!!!

.

Heybatter...Thanks for sharing...It has brought up some excellent postings...and in our case some thoughts are are central to our experience ...

We in sport must ask ourselves on a daily basis....

Is sport fostering an increasingly strong and bond between son and family?

Is sport improving our comunication process?

Are we using sport...of course the wins and the successes and achievements but more importantly the losses and the struggles...to teach life lessons? (putting down the glove is simply one more in a long series of life lessons...)

Will ours sons be better people, not just better ballplayers for having had this experience?

Are WE as parents better people because of this experience?

And finally....If it all ended tommrow at this level, would it have been worth every minute?

Based upon your posts that you can answer a resounding yes to all....All the best to your family!



.



It has always been about the journey not the result.

HeyBatter:

Like many others have said - thank you so much for sharing the story. It is a great reminder for all of us that sooner or later this day will come for all of us parents and our sons. I am sure that this decision was not an easy one for your son nor was that call an easy one to make. My thoughts will be with both you and your son today.

Very depressing topic.

I told my son if I died tommorrow I would be a happy man but if he quites baseball before I die then he is the DEAD MAN !

I am grieving for you Batter !

There is always co ed beer ball.

Thanks for sharing, Heybatter. We're all going to get this call one day, and your post has caused me to reflect on what it's going to be like. Not only will I hear from my son that he's finished some day; but also from many other boys I've coached, some for over 5 years and whom I care deeply about.

For some of those boys, I expect that I'll be very happy as they're moving on to the next phase of their lives. For a few, I know I'll be sad or disappointed as they have tremendous talent that many others so desperately wish they possessed, and it'll eventually end for all of them.

Cherish all the good things that baseball has brought your son, and family. Those are experiences and memories that you are so fortunate to have and will remember forever. I hope your son is doing well with this decision, and feels energized going forward with new passions to pursue. Best of luck to both of you.

Fungo, your comment about wishing you had more time with your son for fishing reminds me of how lucky I am with my own. He loves to fish and it is one of the special things we enjoy together when off the diamond. He loves baseball and, hopefully, will play longer than a few more years. When the time comes that he no longer plays, I imagine we'll spend even more time drifting down some great western rivers together. If you're ever visiting our part of California, you're always welcomed in our boat.

HeyBatter,

As others have said, thanks for sharing the news with us. I also have enjoyed your posts, and hope you will continue to be part of the "family" here.

Just wanted to poke my nose in here again and to first thank you all once more.

Spoke with my son again last night and got a little more insight into his decision. Basically, this was nothing negative about baseball, but more to the positive about other things in life. He is blessed to have a great deal of other talents other than baseball but he's always chosen to place them in the "back seat" in favor of the diamond. After a year and a half of college though, I guess he just couldn't keep the door barred on all these other things.

Increasingly, he told me he's found that he couldn't take certain classes, had to forgo a number of other opportunities for internships and other things and was becoming increasingly concerned about where the future would lead with baseball focused so much for him.

He says he still loves the game (even has time still booked at a local batting cage). Today he's working out with a friend who's a former major league player. Basically, he's not writing off baseball, but at this point the rigors and demands of college baseball and his desire to not put forth anything but his best effort are in conflict with his desire to attend to so many other things that college presents.

In the past and truly by his choice he has devoted his time to baseball over other alternatives, as have we all and our sons. In the course of high school, among many things, he missed his prom to attend a tournament. He's never gone on a traditional spring break trip, instead always choosing to play ball. He's never participated in certain activities such as skiing for fear of injury and left football after developing tendinitis and fearing it would interfere with the baseball season. He's a fairly talented guitarist, but bp always came before music lessons.

I think the turning point was this Thanksgiving when he was in a major car accident. Every worse case scenario was possible in that wreck and he was blessed to walk away without a single scratch. But, I think it got him started thinking about all the things he wanted to do in life in addition to baseball. Unfortunately, I guess that as you reach higher levels of a sport and the demands it presents, you start dealing with "instead of" not in addition to. As he was approaching the half way mark of college he just started seeing that there were so many "instead ofs" that had passed him by and he just wanted to expand his experiences and horizons before college was in the rear view mirror (man it goes fast).

I've always felt one of the worst things in life is to have regret. He assures me that he has no regret in "curtailing" baseball at this point and no regret for everything he has put into it up to now. He said he would regret though missing out on other opportunities that are now present as college life unfolds.

What struck me the most was what he did NOT say. No complaints about his coach or teammates. No complaints about his team's success or lack of it. No complaints about playing time issues, etc. etc. No complaints about baseball at all, just the desire to add other things to his life experience and with some room still somewhere for the game he loves.
I really like this kid

After having a day to reflect, I can only reiterate that so much good has come from our involvement in baseball and with all that, I think so many good things lie ahead. More baseball will certainly be one of those good things, if only as fans and no longer as participants if that remains the case.

Take care and here's hoping everyone has a GREAT season.

HeyBatter!! Thanks.

Your sharing of this very personal family event with the "extended hsbaseballweb family" has caused so many of us to take time to reflect on baseball, it's endings and the really important lessons that we all can gain from this game.

Best of wishes for your son in the path that his life takes him,.... I feel he will do well.

Thanks again.

OPP

HeyBatter - it is hard to argue with that logic. Brings a tear to my eye to read that but it is a very positive story. All the best to your son. He indeed is a fine young man.

ClevelandDad summed it up perfectly.

Much success to you, your son, and your family.

As others have urged...don't be a stranger...leave all that strange stuff to me!

Sincerely hope to keep hearing from you Heybatter.

HeyBatter

So thoughtful of you to share your story with us. It is very hard to watch your son end one phase of his life and begin a new one.

It happens several times throughout thier lives. The first day they set off for school. Years later when they gradauate hs.

It also happens anytime they take one fork in the road over another.

But in each new phase of their lives we find a way to be thankful for what was, what is, and what we can hope will be.

Good luck to your son on the path he has chosen.

Thanks for sharing the second part of your story. Your son's comments give us all plenty to ponder.

One thing I see pretty clearly is that you and your wife are very fortunate to have such a mature and well rounded son. Sounds like he really has his act together. Congratulations.

.

Heybatter...

My '06 had one of those accidents...

Sober but stupid friend driving..45 minutes to cut mine out of the wreck..deemed life threatened with broken femurs,head and internal injuries...airlifted to the city...and somehow walks away a day later limpimg and sore but intact...

In my book yours is being saved for a special purpose...

.

I think the reason we love baseball so much is because we share it with our sons, When baseball is over we will find some thing new that we will share with them and love it too... Its all about our sons.

Hey friend...I sent you a private message. All the best to you and that wonderful boy of yours.

HeyBatter - As has been said, congrats on raising such a mature and focused young man. I know 40 year olds that don't know which direction they should go in life or what's important in their hearts. As njbb says "it's all about the sons" and you all have obviously raised a smart one!

HeyBatter- Life moves on as you well know. I hurt for you because I am sure that you enjoyed watching your son play and following him in his endeavors on the field. But what is more important than baseball is that you have a relationship with your son outside of baseball. Baseball will end someday for everyone. But the relationship that you build with your son will last you a lifetime. You know what, now you can spend some time building other common interest like fishing, hunting, going to games, and hopefully in the future coaching the grandchildren together. Like PG said there are more important things than baseball. One of them is life. Good luck to you and your son and I think you have shown alot of class by bringing this up here for everyone to talk about.

Hey Batter:

There is not much left to say after what has previously been posted, except the obvious: You've got a great son and you are smart enough to understand that, appreciate that and trust that. Best of luck, and I hope to see you around here years into the future.