High School Coaching

I would not get involved. You don't want to get caught up in the HS drama and other parents. There is a lot of drama and my sons school. There is a group of parents out to get the HC removed. I stay clear of all such nonsense no matter what I think of the program. It is only HS baseball, enjoy it while you can.

Here at 2016 school he has way past 50% of the same things to deal with as your guy.It helps that in the entire H.S.B.B. system theres not really a quality 12u travel coach.So theres no one to compare H.C. too.First off I would start sitting as far away from the other parents and still have decent sight lines.Get to your car ASAP after games.Especially loses.keep your o pinion/thoughts to yourself. Do NOT let 2018 know your thoughts/opinion on team/coach whatever..Enjoy yourself.Start keeping a score book to help take your mind/thoughts off everything going on.It does help.Do your very best to maximize your funds for winter training. What these kids do thru the winter is way more important than some 12U Town ball  coach in over his head.Also get him to enough tryouts that he plays for a better than average team. Let your guy guide conversations concerning coaching.If he plays for anyone worth thier weight in the summer he will notice theres a difference.

"HS baseball can and will drive you nuts, and to just have fun with it..."

 

Heed this advice...

ohio dad,

First, compliments on the clarity of your post.

Second, I agree with standballdad.  Stay clear.

Third, you mention that the current upperclassmen have "no sense of urgency in games or practices", but the future is bright in terms of the players coming up. In my opinion, in the next few years, it's up to those new players, including your son,  to band together to provide the sense of urgency in games and practices.

 

 

I feel your pain.  My kid's school is very similar in many athletic programs.  Thankfully, baseball is the exception and is run by a real good Varsity coach from what I have seen. 

 

But a while ago, I asked about changing the culture -- one of loosing, laziness, etc.  Got many of the same responses -- don't get involved.

 

So lets change the narrative.  Lets say instead of the baseball program, we are talking about the math program.  Do you get involved then?

 

So OH dad, my take is you have to read your Athletic Director and Principal.  They are making the upper level decisions.  Are they complacent?  Are they energized?  Are they competitive?  Do you even see them anywhere?  How long have they been there.  If they are involved, maybe they see the same things? 

 

In our instance, we have years and years of a loosing culture as a result of a complacent athletic director.  He retired a year ago, and now we have the new guy from another school.  Night and Day difference.  He seems to be really setting the tone - mission one, upgrade the weight room to the 1990's (yes it was that bad). 

 

Read the story in the current thread titled "Travel ball vs HS ball.'  The thread is not what the title implies.  Your son may have a great opportunity staring him in the face.  He may even benefit more by playing for the current coach as son will need to take initiative and responsibility for assuring that his skill set continues to improve while playing for a coach who treats him well and holds him in high regard.

 

Meanwhile, from what you describe, I suspect things will sort themselves out but it is best not to assume or push for that.  Take the good with the bad and make the best of it.  No scenario is ever perfect.  Another good read that will add some serious perspective is the current thread "Play Hard. Have fun. I love you."

Thanks guys.  Just what I needed.  Keep it coming.  Always helps to have some good advice. 

 

To answer one question.  New AD last year.  His son is a 2020 at a different school, but plays travel ball. 

 

2018 doesn't mind being a leader.  Leads by example.  Just hard to do too much as a freshman.  Especially when seniors don't care.  Any suggestions 2018 makes, or extra work 2018 puts in, is received poorly, is seen as being a butt kisser, and criticized by older kids.  Coach appreciates, but does not reinforce changes with older kids. 

 

It could be that the coach is also looking forward to the older players being done.  Things may change at that point, especially if the kids lead by example. 

 

Will await more words of wisdom. 

 

Thanks!

When the older kids are gone, your son will be the older kid.  Change can come, just like the talent!

We parents try to fix everything for our kids.  Note the "we" in that sentence.  That include "me."

 

I crossed a great bridge as a parent when I stopped trying to fix the non-safety things....when I stopped trying to make life perfect for my kids.  The truth is, life isn't perfect or even close and my kids grew up a lot faster when I let them learn to deal with life's little bumps, bruises and non-perfections on their own.

 

Just today my daughter called me from college with a difficult (less than perfect) situation with one of her profs.  What did I say back to her?  Did I try and fix it?  No, I asked back what was she going to do about it?  And then I listened.  And that was it.  She will either solve it or learn to deal with it in her own way and that is the best thing - because, aside from growing up just a little more, she is the one who will live with her own solution...whatever it is.

 

Both of our sons have dealt with baseball 'situations' far more difficult than the one your son is dealing with.  I was their sounding board when they needed it and I supported their way of fighting through it, but I did not solve it for them.

 

The most satisfaction I've ever gotten as a parent was not in watching our kids win championships or MVPs or even getting "A's"...but the most satisfaction has been in watching them navigate through and solve tough situations and problems.

 

Try it, you'll like it!! 

Agree 100%!  We, the parents, are compassionate people and we strive to fix what's wrong in our kids lives, we have been doing it since they were born, it is a habit.  But it is a habit that we need to break. 

 

Is the baseball coach the most qualified to lead...maybe not, but if he isn't causing a safety concern why should you become involved?  Is this YOUR coach?  Is this YOUR team?  Is this YOUR High School experience?

 

This is part of letting go and letting the kids be who they are going to be.  I don't want my 2020's first problem solving battle with an authority figure to be when he is 22 and in his first "real" job....he's got to learn to pick his battles and solve his own problems, without the help of his parents.  He needs to figure out what he can live with and what is important enough to him to try to change.  I'm here for advice....but only after he tells me HIS plan to solve HIS problem.

Actually, I see the problem as being bigger than the kid.  If he goes to a school that underachieves (whether it be academics or athletics, or whatever), then how did it get that way, why does it stay that way, and what can you do to change it?  Many time it is the parents and community that sets the tone.  If they have low expectations, then the school will have low expectations.  If the parents have high expectations, the school will follow.  I have seen it played over many, many times.  So if the parents sit on their hands, how do they change expectations? 

So what?

Just because he's a freshman doesn't mean he can't lead by example.  Sure, it won't be easy (whoever said life would be easy), but eventually it will pay off.  Sad that the seniors or the coach don't see this.

I think there is a ton of truth to this but I also know that there is a ton of potential problems that come with this outlook.  How do you keep the wanting change for the better (which is good) from avalanching into a lynch mob our way so fire this person (which is bad)?  Sadly this is what could happen if not careful.  Bunch of well meaning parents try to create change because it's right and not for their individual kid.  Then all of a sudden it gets out of hand and you have lynch mobs formed because some parents aren't getting their way.

Saw this at my 2015's HS.program . I think 4-5 years ago varsity had a 2-18 record , now last year 17-3..program has been on uptick and ranked in top 50 nationally this year. More talent in the pipeline, especially COMPETITIVE/ATHLETIC kids who care and are willing to put in the extra work.

If you get involved it better be with a trusted confident. Otherwise odds are very good it will get back to the coach 2018s dad tried to get him removed.

I see a political tone to this which I do agree with.

However thought it over.

I would save this fight for more important battles

Well gentleman.  I will get involved.  But in this way.  Supporting coach and hoping that the graduation of dead weight will improve things.  I will coach up my son, that he and another good player on the team can support coach.  That coach is a good guy, in a bad situation this year.  That they, as players, can help improve things beginning as soon as this season ends.  They can set the tone.  Good things will follow. 

 

Looking at it, and after having read all the comments on here, I believe the lazy and un-caring older kids, are where my focus really has been.  Drives me nuts.  Not used to it, and can't tolerate it.  Not "my" coach, and not "my" team.  Never thought that, and don't believe anything I wrote suggested that. 

 

The JV coach did most of the training in the early practices (really good stuff) anyhow, but was unable to coach up the Varsity once we broke into two teams. 

 

I expect it will be much the same heading into next year, as far as the former D1 (JV)coach talking and working technique in early practices.  It will then be up to the players/leaders to ensure that the work continues. 

 

I am not going be the parent that causes problems.  Will focus on the future, and help in keeping positive attitudes with the players that matter going forward. 

 

What a great place this website is!  Thanks for the counseling.   

 

 

SR son (#1 pitcher) was/is in a similar situation.  Long time coach.  Nice guy and has had a few successful years in his 26 years there.  Really no team discipline and the kids not real motivated.  Last year 4-21 in a very competitive large school suburban conference.  They started this season 1-6.  Was talking to my son about a week ago.  Sort of out of the blue he says “Mason(SR catcher) and I put together some team rules and we’re going to have a player meeting today”.  Wanted to ask what they were but stayed out of it.  Was very proud of him stepping up.  Next game you could see and feel the difference.  Now riding a two game winning streak. 

Point is the players can, if they want too, work things out on their own – without parents and coaches.

Ohio Dad - I think you either did a great job of pulling all the right stuff from the posts or you had a pretty good bead on things to begin with.  I do understand that it may be much more feasible for son to jump into more of a leader role (beyond by example) next year as a soph than this year.  Great outlook.

 

BTW, sounds like the JV coach can be a great resource for extra reps and work outside of V practice time. 

 

Best to you and son. 

Not only should you not say anything you need to sit back and enjoy it. If he's playing summer ball on a competitive team he will get what he needs there. As far as HS:

The coach doesn't comment or change mechanics: So he's not teaching anything bad that will have to be corrected.

He's a nice guy: So your son isn't being abused

He plays everyone: So you don't have to worry about your kid being over used.

Is this a perfect HS program no but it isn't one that's going to hurt you kid either. Having an abusive coach, one teaching all his players to hit the ball into the ground, over using pitchers, only playing teachers kids, etc. etc. There are much worse programs. Be thankful of the one you have lol.