How to deal with high school baseball politics

May I say the first thing you must do is stop making excuses for your son. Tell him no matter what, he BETTER not slow up or argue with kids on the team and have it spill over in the hallways. He is a freshman! If he is getting ANY playing time on Varsity as a freshman, consider himself lucky. Tell your kid to get out there and hustle every play. The quickest way to get yourself no playing time, or even off the team is bad attitude. 

I agree with Coach Mills.

 

You and your son are focused on everything except where the true issue lies.  You can't control coaches, teammates, politics, other attitudes or performance.  All you can control is your own attitude and effort.  Unless your son figures out that one simple principle, his career (if you can even call it that) will be a short one.

 

I would stop making excuses for what appears to be your son's bad attitude and have him fix it yesterday.  They will not put up with it indefinitely.

he has acted out several times and got in trouble for it.

 

No matter what you feel your son has to play and keep his mouth shut.

 

Next day, me and my get called in and jakes in trouble for fighting with the kid, had to have a meeting with the varsity head coach.

 

Why did you have to be called in? don't understand that but i have been out of it so maybe this is common?

The first thing I taught my kids is that is does not matter what else happens to or for other kids on the team.  He needs to hustle ALL the time.  Also, if the coaches don't address  the issue of him getting on another teammate for something like your son did, i will address it immediately.  You do not have to get on a teammates case to catche the ball......it's like telling the pitcher to throw strikes.  Like some of the others have psoted, he needs to learn to deal with what he CAN control, not what he CAN'T

Because of your attitude and actions your son is probably going to fail. He'll make excuses, give half-effort, and blame politics and the coach when he's not starting on varsity his senior year, if he hasn't quit baseball by then. You will of course enable ALL of this because you serve as his example of how to handle adversity.

 

You need to see that the way you handle this situation doesn't impact just his athletic future, but his life as a man. Big picture over baseball.

With due respect, your kid sounds like a tool.  He certianly is a bad teamate.  Of course, he is a prospect -- being brought up to the varsity and all.  70% of line drives result in a hit.  Maybe your kid should learn how to get batters out with ground balls and pop flys (that's what I would have told him if I was the RF). 

 

From your story, I see no evidence of "politics."  I just see a bad attitude.  The unfortunate thing is that your kid now has the bad reputation.  It will follow him around for the rest of his HS career.  He'll need to go over and above to try to change it.  Good luck.   

My son recently signed with a college.  The College coach said to me at the last game he attended he really like my son's mound presents and he did not outwardly show emotion because of his teams leaky defense.(that and his curve ball)  Not having a good mound presents will definitely keep you from going to the next level.

Yeah, I'm not buying this one. A college coach wouldn't be "scouting" a freshman game. If, by some slim chance this is the truth, the college coach WILL retract any interest when he finds out your kid has attitude issues and is not a team player.

Coach Mills, I think Dad32 is different person from OP

My 2015 has been pitching for a long time, on teams of varying skill levels.  Some days, even the best teams can have a rough fielding day.  But my kid has learned to never show emotion on the mound.  No slumping shoulders, no shaking the head after an error or what he thought should be a strike, no kicking the dirt, no yelling, nothing.  That's why his coach likes to use him in pressure situations, he says he has icewater in his veins.  2015 would never call a kid out on the field for making an error. 

 

We've always thought that the pitcher's attitude sets the tone for the game.  If the pitcher shows he's frustrated or angry, it brings the whole team down.  If the pitcher remains confident, the team remains steady.  I will say that he did fist-pump after throwing a complete game win the other night...after he was in the dugout.  Attitude, in baseball and in life, can help you succeed or make you miserable.  It's the attitude you choose to take that makes the difference. 

 

We do have one pitcher who is terrible about wearing his emotions on his sleeve and he made a snide remark on the field to a kid that had just booted a ball.  I told that kid after the game that the next time the pitcher makes a comment to him tell him "Talk to me after you throw a perfect game."  Very few players make zero errors 100% of the time...including pitchers.  That pitcher got an after-game conference with the coaches and hasn't had a start since.  And that was our only loss of this season.

I stand corrected. Sorry Dad32!

I'm just wondering if the original post is a joke or something?

 

...or has the world gone to the crapper?

 

If its not a joke, "Social guy," I think your son is lucky to not have been benched...or cut.

One hopper to your son for an easy throw to first to get the batter out.  For some reason your son air mails the first baseman and that same RF is doing his job and backing up the play.  He gets the ball quickly and either holds the runner at first or nails him trying to get to second.  What would your response be if this same RF tells your son to "throw the **** ball to first" in the dugout?  Last time I checked all the players are in the same boat and mistakes are going to be made.  That boat gets really small when there's one or a group of guys who want to be immune from the same criticism they put on other players they deem as unworthy.

 

I don't see politics - I see discipline and you and your son don't like it.  Is it fair that your son gets yelled at for pulling up going to first when others don't?  No but if your son hustled through the base like he should then a word would never have been said.  The only thing that could happen is the coach might use your son as the example of how to run thrrough the bag.  This goes back to what others have said - control the things you can control and ignore the rest.  It's your son's choice to hustle or not.  A coach or other player or you make that decision for him - only he can make that decision.  If he chooses not to hustle then he needs to be ready to suffer any and all consequences for it. 

 

Tell your son to become the ultimate team mate - always hustle, help others who are less talented than him, support others when they make mistakes, listen with eyes on coach when he talks and things like that.  Life gets much better that way and it stands out in a positive way.  Right now your son is standing out in a negative way and it will be hard to overcome.  Nobody on the staff promised your son anything after the summer season.  He has to go out and earn it. 

My 2014 "threw a fit" while pitching a summer game 2 years ago, got mad a RF for missing a fly ball. Total meltdown. HC pulled him out of game immediately, I was an asst coach, he looked a me, I shrugged and said he more than deserved it, After game. He made my 2014 apologize  to whole team. Then he benched him for next 2 games. Told him (privately) right after he apologized. When I got him to car, I simply said he was lucky, I would have booted him off team. Tough lesson, but he learned. Turned around his attitude and has never been anything but a great teammate since. RF? One of his best friends today.

Control what you can control. Get your own kid in line and stop the excuses. Assuming he wants to play on the next level, no college coach is going to put up with that attitude. No matter how good you (or he) thinks he is, every kid on the next level will be a similar or better player.

 

Have him act with the attitude like he is fighting for a job. Hustle, hustle, hustle! 

Social guy- Eye black and arm guards aren't the issue. The issue is your son patronizing his teammate and not hustling on the field. 

 

My mom used to tell me: "I don't care what anyone else did. I care what you did."

Soccer is irrelevant, so is the fact that he's playing on the freshman team. The problem is his attitude. Until it changes, the coaches won't. 

 

FWIW, like justbaseball, I thought the first post was kind of a joke. Hard to believe a parent is defending a kid for this type of behavior in a team sport. Completely unacceptable.

Hey Social Guy- I noticed you deleted your original post and changed your tune a bit when no one came to your defense. I truly hope you see the errors in the way of taking up for a kid (yours or someone else's) when they act like you described. I understand "daddy ball" can get pretty political and annoying at times, but the main thing is get YOUR kid's head on straight. He will best benefit if you show and tell him exactly how to act/react in these type situations. Are you being the dad he needs so he can be the son you are proud of in any situation?

For what it's worth I showed the OP to my 2017, before it was deleted.  Even he said that the player needs to play hard, support his teammates "no matter what" and not worry about what others do.  

I agree with the rest of them if your son is a freshman and was asked to move up to varsity he really should keep his opinions to himself he is lucky he is even playing I know for a fact the coach we have would sit anyone with an attitude no matter how good they are.Respect respect respect,  Sportsmanship sportsmanship sportsmanship is what we learned, be respectiveful to your coach, umpire and players on the team your not better than everyone else they are all playing for the same reason for the love of the game and of course to win if your lucky!

 

Goes back to the first thing I said to my son when he tried out as a Freshman.

 

Don't get noticed by the coach for doing the wrong thing.

How does the old saying go?

 

Something about "apples not falling far...."

How to deal with HS baseball politics? 

 

First of all, most of the time when I hear this accusation, it is no more than someone's opinion.  Usually heard from someone who feels slighted.

 

Next, politics does exist at times.  Sometimes the friend of the coach has a son who is favored.  Most of us have seen this happen along the way.  If it happens, guess you will have to be one of the best 8 rather than best 9. I understand parents love their kids, but complaining about things you can't control will only throw fuel on the fire.  While someone is bad mouthing the coach, their are several that are sick of listening.

 

It's been my experience that the best kids and best players have the most realistic and least complaining parents. Often they are the "teams" biggest supporters and their son is a great teammate. 

 

Make up is extremely important in a baseball player.  It is what causes some to be more successful than others of equal or better ability.  A players make up is definitely formed at home. Anytime a parent talks bad about a coach, anytime a parent complains about a teammate, anytime a parent tells son he is getting screwed, anytime a parent sticks up for son who has screwed up... Parent is guiding son's make up in a negative way.

To me that is nonsense if your good enough you'll play it's all about attitude and hard work ethics I really don't believe in the high school politics.  Your high school coach well ours anyway are teachers also you can come to them after a game or at the end of the school day and talk about any conserns you may have but he would rather talk to the student/athlete than the parent.

 

I have seen cases of what I thought was politics, not many.  We all want the best for our kids.... but sometimes we, me included lose sight of "what the best" really is.

 

It's a parental reaction to take care of you child, when you think he has been wronged. Sure we all get mad, just don't dog the coach or your sons teammates.  Everyday is a new day to change a coaches mind, to improve you own game.

 

Believe me all parents are dealing with something on some level. What I have to keep telling myself and sometimes TPM tells me as well   

 

I felt my son's coach should have helped him more with recruiters, but that was a selfish approch, its a team game, when the recruiters do come, he needs those teammates to have his back..... 

 

My oldest son came home after a game , a game he thought he was going to pitch I thought he was going to pitch, grandfather thought he was going to pitch guess what he did not pitch.

 

 I had rehersed what I was going to say, how he needed to talk to the coach blah blah blah.........  I said " that really stinks, they told you were pitching, and then they pitched the other kid, he's not the picher you are."  My son looked at me and said, it's ok dad...... I said well it's not right"  and then son said " it's fine, I pitch a lot of innings,  XXXXX needed that game, it was the perfect team to help his confidence"  we will need him later in the year....  you know how I felt ?

 

My point is ........it's their team, it's their coach, it's their school, it's their friends.... don't blow it for them.  I had to learn... you other parents need to learn it to. It's a very short time..... enjoy it.

 

 

 

 

In my opinion as a head coach, I think sometimes politics gets confused for a lack of understanding what goes on in the mind of the coach.  Case in point, I have a player who's position is occupied by a returning all leaguer who can out hit and out field him.  The back up player can out hit my left fielder but not does not have the skills to play any position on the field but the specific position he is playing, he also can not out hit my DH.  I have gotten accused many times by this parent of playing the politics game.  The dad refuses to ackdowledge, even when confronted with the obvious, that this issue exists.

 

Every coach would love to get all of his bats in the lineup.  However, there are times in which that becomes impossible and sometimes you have to give up some offense in order to have a complete team on the field.

bacdorslider,

Good stuff! We've all made mistakes. Sometimes we even correct them, sometimes we don't.  What's important is learning and sharing with others so they might avoid a problem. My grampa once told us kids, most everything you learn in life will come from other people. Listen and Pay attention to what is going on!!!! Well some things you learn on your own, but he sure had a good point.

I wish I could agree with you, but there are major politics in a lot of high schools. Now, as far as the being good enough, I agree. However, there is always the head scratching that comes along with "Why is that particular kid playing?" Then you read the writing on the wall that he wouldn't even be able to make the JV squad, but you find out mom or dad is head of booster club. It happens a lot. I would be obligated, as the head coach, to play my best 9 no matter who does what behind the scenes.

bacdorslider,

I am so proud of you!

It's not a question of politics or not. We all know there are situations where politics exist. And there are situations where it is perceived. The question really is what are you doing? Using its as an excuse to whine, cry, complain, etc? Or are you taking care of your business? The things you control. I can honestly say I played the players I thought were the best options. Period. But that didn't stop some people from thinking it was political. The people were the parents of players that were not playing. Not all of them. Just a few from time to time. It didn't take long to see the parents negative influence filter down to their kids. And once it did the competition was over. On the other hand the parents that stayed positive and supported their son and the team helped their son have a good experience. And in some cases the player actually ended up being a contributor.

Once the attitude becomes sour the player is done. The parents of these players don't stop long enough to understand what they are doing. They are taking a situation that can be used to bring out the best in their son and helping him fail.

I want players that will fight for it. I want players who want to prove me wrong. Once they go negative with the assistance of the parents in many cases its all over. And that's sad.

Backdoorslider demonstrated an important point. Most kids get it. They know how they stack up, they know how they are doing in practice. 

 

As a parent it is quite easy to focus on our player's potential. We see how much better he's become, or maybe remember how great he was when he was 12. If only he got the chance...and if he doesn't get the chance, well, something is wrong. Politics, bad coach, etc. 

 

The reality is that time and hard work will result in chances for most kids. 

That goes double for me.  Well said.

Make it a triple for me. Thanks for the post bacdorslider.