HS parents: what’s on your mind?

@TexasLefty,

Venting is good!  Most (if not all) of us have been there in one way or another.  Keep in mind your son still has time to develop and improve by the time Spring 2025 rolls around.  All 3 of my sons were different players and showed much improvement between their sophomore and junior years.  It is easy to get lost in all of this.   There isn't just one process going on, there are multiple processes going on at the same time and I think that is where it gets challenging for parents.  Most parents see the big picture but don't know how to go after it.  Most players just see baseball and college, so they don't see past that.  My son was concerned about paying for college at 15-16 years old, and we had to get that off his plate.  So, my wife and I struck a deal with my oldest son that his job was to focus on grades, SATs, workouts and baseball.  Our job was to research, and understand college recruiting and admissions, finances, etc....  If everybody did their job, we had a chance at success.   

Many years later, I can honestly admit I had a love/hate relationship with my oldest and middle son's high school coaches and program.  Their high school was known mostly for football and winning state championships.  The education they received was incredible and prepared them for college engineering extremely well.  Baseball was not at the top of the list for this high school and the coaching staff was constantly changing.  My sons did their best with what they had in high school, and there were many lips bitten.  My oldest son's focus was on travel baseball, as it sounds like your son is too.  The downside of "coasting in high school" is that your son needs to understand the college coaches, cross-checkers and other baseball people do go to high school games.   They may not be there to see your son but they may be there to see another player.  I've known many players who get discovered while the college coaches are watching another player.  It happened to my son during a travel tournament and an SEC school.   Your son needs to be aware there are people watching, and they aren't always dressed like they are baseball coaches.  My son had a guy in street clothes (totally 100% incognito) following him around at an academic showcase event.  We finally found out who he was when he followed us to our car.  Creepy yes, but there was a reason he was dressed that way and we were more than happy to talk to him.     

Just my experience.  Best of luck to you and your son!

I agree with what you said.  Just venting so I don’t lose cabin pressure in the wrong place 😁

Texas Lefty:

This is an opportunity for you to "give back" to the game you respect. Talk with the Coach and ask what you can do to organize a "fund raising" event.

This will help the team and provide an atmosphere of cooperation with the parents, coaches and players.

Bob

@TexasLefty posted:

This fall, what HS grade/Position and what are your successes or pain points?  Just a thread to vent or chat  I’ll go first.

Jr -LHP/1B

1:  love the Maturity gains in taking even more ownership of his training.  Seeing improvements physically.

2.  Hit a velo personal best in game recently but still wondering where the missing mph will come from.  I am trusting the process but time is running out as a jr.

3. I have a (secret) love/hate relationship with HS team.  It is mediocre talent and coaching and a lot of undeserved inflated egos.  Son coasts too much in that environment.  And has a totally different focus than when he’s pitching/playing against top tier travel teams.  Probably the most maddening thing I suffer through.

Just needed to vent.  Thanks

Out of curiosity, don't you find point #3 somewhat ironic? 

I have a 2027 and am guilty of focusing on getting him to the next level better travel team, better metrics, more muscle, velo etc.

BUT I learned a big lesson sigh...

His mental health is important over anything else and it is not connected to the level of team he plays on or if he has the goods to get noticed.

Son switched teams of his accord this fall over strenuous parental objection. He struggled to find his place socially this summer.

He doesn't alot of friends at school. So it's been a godsend to see him smiling again and actively participating in everything. He's learning a ton and still playing competively with quality coaching. From the outside looking in I thought he was crazy as we loved everything about his summer team but HE wasn't happy.

So my worry is about my son being happy and well adjusted over athletic achievement right now. He will switch to a different sport for the first time this winter and I am looking forward to him making new friends.

He will still train and lift when he can but I actually think this shift will help his game more.

Ironically while this has going on he's been performing better at the plate. He's picked up a bit of velo and lowered his pop time.

But I would really like to see him make more friends and have a more balanced life.

If he ends up playing in college that is for him to decide. Right I need to remove pressure not add any.

Of my 3 sons, 2 play baseball.  Oldest is in his freshman year at a private university on scholarship and will make the varsity roster in the spring and will play.  So, in my mind, I'm done with him.  Middle son is a 15 year old HS sophomore who is a 6'5 195# RHP.  He wants to pitch at Ohio State, so we will see about that.  If his development continues upwards, I image he may have a shot.  We spent 2 years trying to catch up to his body and now that his growth has slowed somewhat, the skill development and strength growth along with a focus on flexibility and mobility is the emphasis of this off-season.  I am going through the second round a lot different than with my oldest.  Less stress, lower expectations, no yelling and surprisingly that tactic works too!! 

BB, yes, I too learned a lot from my 2025 to my 2027, definitely makes it less stressful!

@BB and BB posted:

Of my 3 sons, 2 play baseball.  Oldest is in his freshman year at a private university on scholarship and will make the varsity roster in the spring and will play.  So, in my mind, I'm done with him.  Middle son is a 15 year old HS sophomore who is a 6'5 195# RHP.  He wants to pitch at Ohio State, so we will see about that.  If his development continues upwards, I image he may have a shot.  We spent 2 years trying to catch up to his body and now that his growth has slowed somewhat, the skill development and strength growth along with a focus on flexibility and mobility is the emphasis of this off-season.  I am going through the second round a lot different than with my oldest.  Less stress, lower expectations, no yelling and surprisingly that tactic works too!!

Just FYI — you're never done!! I still fret about every start, and I need to go mail him his car keys before he gets back to his car in two weeks.

@Iowamom23 posted:

Just FYI — you're never done!!

Truer words have never been spoken.

  I searched for the proper thread and this was the best I could find. Because I refuse to start a new thread on the subject of soccer.
  I had heard that youth soccer is every bit as insane as youth baseball. But I have never personally witnessed it. Until today. I’m on the road scouting and spent last night in Norman, OK. Getting coffee in the hotel lobby this morning and the breakfast area is over run with grade school kids in soccer gear. I asked one of the coaches how old the kids were and where they are from. The answer? Six and seven year olds from Tulsa. Which is about 2 1/2 hours away.
  Six and seven year olds doing overnight travel to play 1st & 2nd grade level soccer?!

What are these parents thinking?!?

@adbono posted:

.........................................

What are these parents thinking?!?

These parents are approaching the "Peak of Inflated Expectations" way ahead of schedule.  It'll take another 7-8 years to get to the "Trough of Disillusionment".

I am sorry but I cannot stop seeing adbono with the soccer Moms.

I would pay to see/hear that!

His "openness" would get him hurt.

Our area is big on soccer. My son started rec soccer at age four (turning 32 this year). One of the soccer organizers told me if they get a head start on baseball maybe some good athletes stay with soccer in the spring. Soccer was also the first sport to play off season in our area.

The whole thing has become insane. There’s no need for “traveling” before the teen years. No one should care if their team is the best in the region or country before the teen years. There are way too many kids in travel who belong in rec. My son’s preteen travel teams stayed within two counties. We were fortunate the regional USSSA base (13-16u) was only 45 miles away. We played six or seven of our tournaments there. Aberdeen (Ripken) was only 80 miles away.

When we (I was head coach) had a long break in a 14u tournament I walked by a 9u game. These parents all thought their kids were going to play D1 ball because of the program their kids played, I made a parent friend in the program through this board. When our kids were 17u he told me there were only four kids remaining from that travel program’s 13u A team.

But if you want to see intense parents attend girl’s travel sports. A brawl nearly broke out on the sidelines in one of our 16u travel tournaments. We (I was an assistant) were playing, and beating the only NJ team remaining in the tournament. We not only had to beat the opponent. We had to beat the umpires (horrible one sided homer calls) and out of control parents on the sidelines. The police had to be called in when it became obvious we were going to win. Opposing teams fans were gathering around our field exit.

I scolded my daughter for getting mouthy with fans on the sidelines. She was pissed they were throwing little rocks at her. They were also calling her “slut.” She tuned out the noise.

A friend has a theory about girl’s travel parents. The most intense dads are the ones who wished they had a son.

@Good Knight posted:

I am sorry but I cannot stop seeing adbono with the soccer Moms.

I would pay to see/hear that!

His "openness" would get him hurt.

🤣

My frustration with HS baseball continues though.