Is it reasonable to ask for a player and parent list during a visit?

Homebuilder,
I could see where your question might meet with resistance.

If I may make a suggestion, most of the media guides contain information on players addresses and phone numbers. If you do not have one, simply ask, they will be more than happy to give one to you. Most parents will not mind the phone call inquiry. Explain where you got their number from.

Hope this helps.

I understand the coach's position. I wouldn’t take it as a negative. Home Builder, I may be off base but this is my opinion. As a parent I wouldn’t want a coach giving out my name and phone number to the parents of a prospective recruit. The decision to sign should be between the coach, the player, and his parents. If you insist on contacting other parents, you can do it on your own usually getting enough information from the colleges’ websites. Most websites have the player’s name, his hometown, his high school and his parent’s name. I might add that parental comments should be taken with a grain of salt and I wouldn’t put much stock in a parent’s evaluation of a coach and a baseball program. Parents tend to be very biased one way or the other and very unreliable. I also think that an incoming player wouldn’t want his parents calling the other player’s parents. These players see themselves as young men and are beginning to define their “territory”. I would think calling other parents would be considered “intrusive” by the son. Again, just my opinion.
Fungo

If I were the coach and you me asked that I would very nicely say "SEE YA"--any offer made is off the table-- any offer to come won't happen

That is the quickest way to offend a coach--homework should be done before class not during, if you get the idea

During our last official visit, it was Parents Day, and the Coach tried to introduce us to as many parents (and players) as he possibly could. Guess he had nothing to hide!!!

Puma1,
Same thing happened on one of my son's official visits. Son spent 2 whole days in total immersion, but they (wisely) included us parents in some things. We attended an intra-squad scrimmage and when parents found out we were recruits, they introduced themselves and shared their thoughts (+ and -) about the school, the coaches, the baseball program. The coaches allowed access to the players, too. In making my son an offer, they were totally up front about where my son fit in their program and what they expected of him. When we left, son said he felt like he already belonged there and wished he could start NOW. What more could a parent ask for in this crazy process?! Needless to say, their open approach won them a recruit!

Puma1 and VA Sportsman,
I think you are using examples that are twisting the question and fabricating a misleading conclusion. A coach being hesitant about providing a list of parents for new recruits to contact .... and.... a coach introducing the parents of a recruit on an official visit during "parent day" is quite different. I hope you aren't suggesting that a coach "has something to hide" that doesn't provide a list of parents names to prospects.

quote:

We attended an intra-squad scrimmage and when parents found out we were recruits, they introduced themselves and shared their thoughts (+ and -) about the school, the coaches, the baseball program. The coaches allowed access to the players, too.

Again this is quite different and would be the norm at any college program. Players are REQUIRED to interact with new recruits and parents and boosters will often seek out the parents of new recruits to make them “feel at home”.

One thing we should consider is the reputation of the program and the reputation of the coach. A program and a coach without much in the way of credentials may be more agreeable to go the extra mile in trying to sell their program and may even provide personal information about the parents while the likes of Coach Ron Polk or Augie Garrido would be offended if the parent of a prospect asked for a list of players and parents so "we can check everything out".
Fungo

Fungo,
I neither "twisted" nor "fabricated". In fact, I didn't even offer a conclusion. I merely reported our experience and noted how it impacted our eventual decision. The conclusions are left to the reader (and you've obviously drawn quite a few of your own). I also disagree with your comment about what is "the norm at any college program". After 3 official visits and a few other "unofficials", I can tell you that not only was it not the norm, it was the distinguishing feature that figured prominently in our decision.

VA Sportsmom,
Sorry I called you VA Sportsman...Must be the bifocals. Lets say you didn’t twist the question and lets start over again.. The original question was a good question….

quote:

One of the things we ask each coach during the visit is for a contact list of players and parents. This has met with more resistance than success. Is this a reasonable request?

With that question on the table for discussion, Puma1 stated an experience at “parents’ day” where the coach tried to introduce us to as many parents (and players) as he could. In my opinion this didn’t address the original question. Not faulting Puma1 because that incident formed a good impression but it is misleading because it is a different situation. Puma1 then planted a seed by saying.

quote:

Guess he had nothing to hide!!!

I don’t think it’s too far fetched that this comment was meant to suggest that if a coach didn’t comply with home builders request for a parent/player contact list that they “had something to hide”? Should we let home builder form that opinion on his/her own? Maybe yes, but maybe we can and should help.
You then intentionally or unintentionally substantiate Puma1’s position by saying: “Same thing happened on one of my son's official visits”. Let me add something. I could say same thing happened at one of my son’s official visit (and did) but that has nothing to do with asking the coach for a parent contact list so you could check out the program. I’m not totally against contacting other parents prior to signing but I would not ask the coach for a parent contact list so I could check out his program. Would you?
I’m not trying to be argumentative for the sake of being argumentative, I’m simply trying to help home builder get some questions to a valid question during a time that can be very frustrating.
Thanks,
Fungo
PS: I stand by my comment that the good experience you had at the itra-squad game is the norm. Baseball people are good friendly people and are eager to be friends with other baseball people.

good question homebuider

my take is that a coach couldn't/wouldn't/shouldn't comply with a request like that, and it has nothing to do with "hiding something"

I might also suggest caution with a coach who did comply with that request -- what other policies does he disregard?

he'd have some explaining to do if he allowed access to his "student file info" for use by someone not affiliated with his school

vamom, congrats on the visit
your description sounds like "the standard visit" of most schools
keep in mind that alot what you experienced is a matter of (good) timing -
if your visit is not on an "intersquad" day or even a rainshower, and the description & experience changes

is there a commitment yet?



.

home builder,

asking for the list tells the coach more about you......................

If you listen and observe while you are on the visit, the things that you want to know will come to light, probably without asking very many questions.........

Host player to recruited player relationship is very important.

Did host play? Look at website stats.

How long there?. Look at player bio.

Read the info on the website. Every word.

Then when you are there, see if it accurate.

I look at it like this...

If you are interviewing for a job, would you ask your perspective employer for a list of employees so that you can call them? They will probably introduce you to a couple, who will talk with you during the interview, but that is it.

Wow. I don't think I ever got a response on a post before. More than meaning a coach has "something to hide" I wanted to emphasize the positiveness of our experience and the openess of the coach involved. If I was "misleading" or changing the direction/question of a post, it was unintentional.