Keeping a player who has quit on you before!

Little League age, give him another shot.

 

College and up, tell him to find another activity.

 

In between, all depends on more facts and circumstances than we have so far.

Unless he has clearly shown that he has grown up, that he has made amends, and that he has the trust of the team, he doesn't come back. He doesn't get the benefit of the doubt in any of these--if it isn't obvious, he's out.

Curious as to why he wants to return. Was  grass not greener on other side? Did he go to others teams and not play there? Also, was it his decision or parents to leave? Don't fault player if parents made him leave. If given second chance have conversation about expectations, consequences if he doesn't follow them. Short leash IMO.

keep us posted on how it went others may learn from it. Good luck

Just saw your added info.

baseball is an unusual sport in that you have to deal w failure many times. You have not said this kid did anything to get better to get more time-just whined. i would drop him. You don't need that negativity, it spreads to others. let him go play summer ball somewhere and be someone else's headache. 

While I feel you displeasure in this particular type of player passion4baseball maybe stop and look at this from all angles. We (us here on HSBBW and maybe even yourself) don't exactly know what his parents are chirping in his ear each day or maybe he's not getting the encouragement and support from home to fight through things in life when adversity faces us. And over time this kid has developed very bad personal skills to face obstacles early on. Maybe he's use to quitting because he is just plain spoiled rotten. What Im trying to get at is what do YOU think could make this kid act and behave the way he does?

 

Let me pull up my egg crate and tell you a true story. There was a young Sophomore in high school who had very little athletic football skills and to him sports was all that really mattered. His achillie's heel in school was math and like every other year he was failing his math class miserably. One day is Math teacher asked him to go fishing after school one day and they had a blast. And they continued to go fishing once a week almost through the rest of the course. As they fished and the Math teacher began getting to know what motivated this young man and how to motivate him this young man's grades shot up and he passed with flying colors. Rather boring story I know, lol. But that young man was me! And I'll never forget Mr. Nelson for doing that. He took the time to show me that he actually cared about me and wasn't about to let me fall through the cracks like all the others. He believed in me. Perhaps you have the greatest opportunity in the world to be that one person in this young man's life to help him understand what staying in the fight with his teammates really means or just how important a team's "role" player is and that they are essential to every team, or that you are looking for that one young man who can be looked on to help motivate them at times you can't, etc. etc.

 

Just my 2 cents.

 

YGD

You haven't provided enough info. Chances are I don't have the player back. If I do he better approach me in a mature manner, then address and apologize to the team.

Very improtant. Is it pay for play summer travel ball? Then it may have been the parents decision. And I wouldn't blame them.

Whether or not to bring him back would depend on the situation.  Did the kid just up and bail on the team for no reason or a bad one?  Or was there a legitimate reason?  What age are the kids?  Was it the players decision or the parents?

 

If they are younger then say 15U I would find out the reason for quitting and sit down and talk to the kid making sure he understands what he did and why it is an issue.   I would lean towards taking him back.  If they are HS age I would have to look at the extenuating circumstances.  Was there a divorce?  Money issues (maybe he had to get a job to help the family), or things along those lines.  If the reason makes sense then I would consider it.  If it didn't really make sense (ie wanted to play lacrosse, or was bored, etc) then no way.

 

 

 

Honestly it doesn't matter what the situation happens to be - bring him back.  We all deserve a second chance and we all make mistakes that we should be able to overcome.  But that doesn't mean you just let him back on like everything is fine and dandy.  Sit down and talk to the kid.  Give him a chance to explain what happened because it may be something bad and now you can make that connection JBB talked about.  Maybe he realized he quit for dumb reasons and got smarter.  Maybe he still doesn't get it and will quit again.  Listen to him and talk to him to find out what's going on.  Then set some parameters and conditions to come back to the team.  He has to learn that there are repercussions for quitting.  Tell him his leash is shorter and he won't get the same leeway as other players due to his history.  Like it or not what you do in your past will follow you - teach him this.

 

Once you do all this then all the information is in front of him to make his own decision.  This is where he gets to show whether he learned anything or not.  We need to teach these kids about second chances and how to make good decisions and take responsibility for their actions.  But pretty hard to do that if they don't get that second chance.

 

Now if he quits a third time you let him go and move on.  You tried and did your best to help this kid.  He just doesn't get it and probably never will. 

for me it is very simple----he does  not come back

The spread of advice in this simple little thread pretty much shows why its so hard to get consensus on much of anything in baseball, and that in turn is why it takes so long to make changes in the game.

 

Personally, I think coach2709’s approach make good common and moral sense, and TRhit’s is far too black and white, and assumes things that aren’t in evidence. I honestly couldn’t look myself in the mirror telling anyone they could have a 2^nd chance based on the information we have, but then again everyone doesn’t have my life’s experiences and I can’t expect them to think the same way I do.

 

But no matter what one’s life experiences, doesn’t it just make sense to investigate any decision that directly impacts another human being before making the final decision?

 

Say in a high school setting the year before you kept him and cut somebody else? Lack of playing time? What would make him think he would get more time after he quit the team last year? He did it once he might do it again. If you decide to take him you tell him in no uncertain terms any whining or anything else and he wont have to quit you will show him the door.

 

Say in a high school setting the year before you kept him and cut somebody else? Lack of playing time? What would make him think he would get more time after he quit the team last year? He did it once he might do it again. If you decide to take him you tell him in no uncertain terms any whining or anything else and he wont have to quit you will show him the door.

 

Originally Posted by Will:

Say in a high school setting the year before you kept him and cut somebody else? Lack of playing time? What would make him think he would get more time after he quit the team last year? He did it once he might do it again. If you decide to take him you tell him in no uncertain terms any whining or anything else and he wont have to quit you will show him the door.

 

Will,

 

Anyone can guess about what may have or have not happened, but why is it always that the worst is ASSUMED? I’ve seen a few kid quit, and when you look deeply enough, its always for a unique reason. That reason may well translate to someone else as whining because of lack of PT, but I assure you that to the individual there’s much more to it.

The original post doesn't give enough information, but I will say it had better have been for a very good and worthy reason the kid quit before, or I would not have him back. 

 

It is not about an individual player, it IS about an entire team.  One 'clubhouse cancer' can ruin an entire team.  Unless this kid's reason was very good, he'd be better off playing for a different team, for all concerned.