Need advice

Welcome aboard jkkmom! Sitting down with coach to get everything out in the open might be the best plan. At best he will see how much the private lessons mean to your son, and allow him to continue with his blessings. At worst you will learn exactly where coach stands on the issue and be better informed on how to proceed.

My kid learned to shake his head yes and then ignore the poor but well meaning advice from his high school coaches and continue to do what was best for him. The college coaches basically laughed at what the high school coaches told him to do when he told them.

I am not sure what private lessons have to do with the coach teaching him to locate his ball. That doesn't make sense but the then spending money for 3 years on lessons doesn't either.

I tend to agree with smalltown. Just tell your son to tell the coach whatever he wants to hear and continue the lessons...I doubt he coach will know. The thing you may want to make sure of is that he is throwing too much between his work at school and his lessons. But other than that, just smile and say "yes sir" to the HS coach.

We had our yearly HS parents meeting with our coach and he knows that almost every one of the kids on the team take some kind of lesson. He ask that the boys stop taking lessons during the season and his explanation is that when the count is 3-2 and the game is in your hands, who are you going to trust. Let me say that he is a BASEBALL coach and not a football coach. We will do what he requested during the season and when it's over we will get back to doing what we do. The upside to stopping during the season, my weekly budget will increase

I do agree with spizz that you should sit and talk with him and find out why he wants him to stop.

Good luck with your season.

Communication is the key. I wouldn't go behind the HS coaches back, hoping he doesn't find out, etc...
Have a meeting with the coach. Any coach worth anything will want to talk about it.

First of all what kind of HS coach would not want his pitcher to get instruction on his own time? Anything that is going to help him become a better player only makes the team better. Secondly how is anything the player is doing on his own time to get better any business of the HS coach? As long as it is not done during HS practice hours why is this even a issue?

Sounds like to me the coaches ego is hurting.

Continue the training. No need to even discuss it with the coach. If he approaches your son about it have him ask why he wants him to stop. Then have a meeting with the coach and see exactly what his reasons are. And then continue to get the instruction after you tell him what I posted earlier.

If the coach wants to win he is going to play the guys that give him the best chance to win. If he sits your son because he wants to work to get better. Do you really want your son to even play for him?

I think Coach May has given you the best advice. Don't cross the bridge until you get to it. If the coach says or does something directly then you'll need to decide what to do. Until then, keep on with what is working.

Now having said that, is there a reason for the coach to be concerned about your son's control? It isn't unusual for kids to struggle with their control a bit and overthrow when moving up from on level to the next. Is his pitching instructor focused on velocity at the expense of control? If so, then maybe the coach has a good reason to be concerned.

OK lets see. I have a kid that is a pitcher for me. I know he gets private lessons. He is getting them from a former pro guy so at least he is not a clown. Ive got all day every day to work with him if I choose. Or at least have the pitching coach work with him. And this kid is willing to go on his own time and work some more to improve his game. He believes that it is helping him. What do I do as a coach? Stop him? Why? I wish to God I had more kids that cared enough to go out there on their own time and work to get better.

This is a classic case of a coach getting his feelings hurt. His ego is getting bruised. As long as your son is respectfull , works hard at practice , tries to do what the coaches want him to do , what is the problem? Now if your son was coming to practice and saying "Coach Im not going to do that because Coach Jimmy said I need to do this." Well if he is shoving it and he is improving Im going to say "You think he can work with the other pitchers"? Now if he is not shoving it and he sucks then Im going to say "You are going to do this because his way is not working".

Dont worry about this kind of stuff. It gets blown way out of porportion. It could be a jealous player going to the coach or a jealous parent. Too many parents think the coach is going to blackball their kid for something. If he helps him win and he has a good attitude and he does it on his own time - Its no ones business but you and your sons.

jkkmom ... when my son was a Freshman he played JV, and the varsity coach made the same request. Because the varsity baseball coach was also his football position coach, we agreed to the request. It was a mistake for our son, and we saw his skills deteriorate as the season went along. Son is now a junior. If the request is made this season, we will respectfully decline and continue the private lessons.