Open Practices

Not  common at our high school.......... My kids is only a sophomore, but the rules were made clear to me by the upperclassman's parents last year. There is an unwritten rule that if a parent comes anywhere close to the practice field or dugout, little johnny will ride the bench.  

In our high school, it was never discouraged but parents were reminded to not communicate with players in regards to practice. Basically, you can sit and watch but there is no cheering or berating your player. At my son's current school, parents are allowed to watch as well but I think parents police themselves, know that the last thing a P5 coaching staff wants is parents getting involved from the stands.

That's strange from my experience.  Unless there is an inter-squad or other exhbition game, I don't think the parents are really welcome to attend practices.  Not sure if coach or HS would or could specfically "prohibit" a parent from watching, but it would be out of the ordinary and may bring unwelcome attention to the player.

Practices closed at son's HS.

Practices were always open at son's HS. I went and watched on occasion, but it was really rare.  Just kept quiet and observed.

I've seen both open and closed practice rules in place and understand the rationale behind both.  I always left mine open but would address protocol at parent meeting.  I would also mention that this is a good opportunity to take another step toward letting your sons become adults and hinted it may be the boys' preference that they didn't attend.  We typically got a few out but certainly not most.

Practices started last Friday (this is the norm every year).  The next day's practices are basically open to come and watch from the stands.  During the week, I don't think that they are open.  The next Saturday less attend.  After that no one attends much.

Ours are open and have been for 20+ years, through 6 head coaches. If they were closed we’d have a parent riot. Very well-attended, which may be why there has been such a coaching turnover.  They should sell tix to help fund the program. 

Parents go to my sons.  I stay away until time to pick him up.  At scrimmages I sit way away from field.  Still have the parents who sit right behind the back stop and yes several say stuff to their kid.  

Being five years apart my kids were not in high school at the same time. I had eight consecutive years of being a high school parent. 

Both the softball coach (older kid) and baseball coach (younger kid) had taken over historically losing programs two years previous. By the time my kids arrived these coaches were tired of parents trying to influence the programs and banned parents. If parents arrived for post practice pickup before practice ended they were not allowed past the trees. Speaking to players was forbidden. 

I coached my kids in travel through 18u Gold softball and 16u baseball. I figured they needed time with the game away from me ... right after they told me. I had offers to coach in both programs. I ran it by my kids. I received an emphatic “No!” both times.

My kids were concerned enough coaches approached me for conversations because I was a travel coach. There were parents who thought I had influence over the high school programs. You can probably guess which parents thought this. 

Your wife?

Son’s high school has always been as open as the campus has been, but with all of the school shootings they have basically locked the campus down and you need a visitors badge to even get to the ball fields now. So, while they are open, you have to either really want to go see them bad enough to go thru the office for a visitor badge or be a ninja.

PitchingFan posted:

Our high school has open practices and most of the parents, especially younger player's parents, go sit and watch practice every day.  I have never seen that anywhere before and wondered if it is strange or common practice?  I never told parents they could not come when I was head coach but I also never encouraged it.  Just wondering what others think.  I very rarely go over there as much as I love baseball and enjoy even watching practice.  I do not think it would affect my kid good or bad but just want to let the coaches have their space.  I can't imagine knowing there were 20 plus parents watching practice every day.

To be candid, I don't know about our HS' policy.  But, without question, I know if they had open practices and I went to watch, my son would literally come after me with a bat for being "that dad."  So, I wouldn't go.  I don't need that stress.

Son’s high school practices starts at 2:30 but are open. Because of the start time, we don’t have a lot of parents attending. 

When son was in HS the practices/tryouts were closed to parents as a general rule.  Coach didn't want any distractions.    If a parent really wanted to observe "a" practice, the coach requested they meet with him privately and he will set it up.  As far as I know practices are still closed to parents.  Same coach is still there.

Ours have always been open. I went to a few over my son's HS years, probably 5 or less. On the other hand, my father rarely missed one for my son and continues with my nephew. If they're practicing, he's most likely there. However, he's usually watching in his vehicle in left/center field. 

I don't know why any parent would want to. To be nosy? To make sure their kid is working hard? Leave the practice for the players and enjoy the games. 

Our HS coach had optional practices this summer for anyone interested in baseball because he was new to the school and program.  Most were in the mornings to try and beat the heat.  I never attended one and my wife and father in law did the dropping off and picking up.  A few times,  the were later in the day and I did the pickup. A saw parents there and asked my son about it.  He said one mother sat in a chair next to the dugout and watched the entire practice. And, he said another dad stood behind the backstop and used his phone to video parts of the practice.  The few times I picked him up, I never got out of the car and waited in the parking lot.  

somewhere common sense should be a part of the human thought process...IMO there is no need for a rule - there is no reason, none, zero - again IMO you have lost your mind if you think it is good idea to go watch practices. 

Your kid doesn't want you there, the coaches don't want you there and if you want what is best for your kid and the program YOU should not be there. Your time is better spent in a strip club giving away the college spending money...ok that might be extreme but you get the point. 

Perhaps for the reasons Old-School suggests, there is no rule out my son's high school.  I'm sure you can sit in the stands and watch practice, but I wouldn't do it.  Neither my son nor his coaches would want me doing that on a regular basis.  Once or twice, I have wandered over when it's pick up time and watched the last five or ten minutes, but I could tell my son would have preferred it if I had stayed in the car . . . and parked the car on the other side of campus!   He gets his license in two months and I'm sure he can't wait to drive himself to and from practice.

I will say it is interesting here and I started the thread.  The field sits down in a valley and the parking lot is 50 feet above the field.  The parents sit in their cars and many stand along the walkway by the concession stand.  I have joked we should sell concessions.   it is a different mentality than any place I have ever been.  There are a lot of older guys who just come watch practice on warm days.  The parents huddle up and evaluate everything done which is good and bad.  I had to go see the coach yesterday for something and my son is still in basketball so not at tryouts yet.  My son could care less whether I am there or not but it would not affect him since I was his varsity coach before we moved here.  I stayed watching a few younger guys we give lessons to.  It was funny listening to parents make excuses why little Johnny could not hit.  The grass is wet, and the balls are wet, and the coach is pitching too slow, he doesn't give them time to go through their pre-hit motions, they can't get in a rhythm, he throws one up and then out and then in and then down and on and on.  I have never heard a parent cheer or yell anything.  They just huddle and watch and wonder whether little Johnny will make the JV, we have no middle school ball so it is 7-10th grade on JV.  I think the coach would have a mutiny if he said no one could come now.  I think it would be different if they were near the field or sitting in the stands or near dugout.  I also think it puts extra pressure on their kids during tryouts. 

old_school posted:

somewhere common sense should be a part of the human thought process...IMO there is no need for a rule...

Hahaha... this should apply to SO MANY THINGS in society too, but doesn't seem to these days.  

It isn't necessarily weird to want to attend your son's practice.

But actually doing it?   Weird.

Son's HS tryouts/practices started and ended before I could ever get there.  So even if I wanted to watch (I didn't) it was a moot point.  

It's one thing to watch from the parking lot the last 5-10 minutes of practice while waiting to take your son home, but why spend 2 hours or more watching practice/tryout?  I've got better things to do with my time.   At our HS the baseball field is a good 100 yards from the edge of the parking lot so even if you watched from the car you really wouldn't see much.  The 1st base dugout runs parallel to the parking lot and blocks a good portion of the infield.

I get it (why some parents feel the need to watch).  At some point though, these parents need to learn to let go.  It's the coaches team and he's in charge of the roster and lineup.

PABaseball posted:

I don't know why any parent would want to. To be nosy? To make sure their kid is working hard? Leave the practice for the players and enjoy the games. 

Honestly in football there are a number of us who go.  It's like our little boys club.  We look forward to the start of season so we can get back together and BS.  I am not sure how much of the practice we watch.  Just time with friends really.   I'd rather do that than be a 56 year old bar fly to get my time away from the house.  I know we should all want to spend that time with our Wives...   but...

Why is there a right and wrong here?   Again I see some taking some kind of elitist eye rolling position of superiority here.  Why do you care if a parent wants to watch his kid practice.  Way back in the 80's and 90's I had open practices.  Even basketball in the gym!   Always told parents they were welcome.  Always told parents in baseball to feel free to listen in on post game talk.  I never did that childish stupid thing (it's only fair I get to be judgmental too since it seems to be the thing to do) of taking the team way down the line or way out into the outfield.  He my post game either in the dugout or if we had to vacate I took them out to a shady spot nearby outside the field.  I always told parents "I shouldn't be saying anything to your kids I wouldn't want you to hear".  Never minded parents hanging out by the dugout and listening in.  Why would I have something to hide???  It's common sense a parent shouldn't want to watch practice????   Why???   Come on people let's get over ourselves.  To each his own. 

We do two things that I instituted and really like.  The first is the "mandatory parent's meeting."  I used quotes because we can't force a parent to come.  The second is that this meeting is held and then parents are encouraged to walk about the field, outside the fence and watch practice.  Our two cages are outside the fence and parents can go over there where I often set up chairs.  On that day, and that day only, I will talk to the parents and let them ask questions.  After that, our practices are open but parents have to stay in the stands for safety reasons.  I really don't mind them being in the stands.  It is not uncommon to have a half dozen or more parents there.  

Here are some issues we will deal with every year:

• What I call the "chuck and duck."  The parent has to bring that sports drink bottle and go over past the dugout to hand it out.  I really wouldn't mind if that was all that they did but, invariably, I'll have to say something and have a conversation.
• At the end of practice when the bases are picked up, the screens moved to their location, the field raked, ... one parent will invariably yell for their child to "come on, we have somewhere else to go."  NOPE.  The team finishes together.  They all put stuff up.  There are not any "stars" on this team who get to get out of these duties.
• The infamous "ball retriever."  This parent could be so helpful and most often are.  However, there will be that one who wants to show off that arm and chuck a ball onto the field while we are hitting.  Most likely, that ball will land somewhere close to me or hit me.  I'm not hip.
• For the first time last year, we had the boom box parent who thought we needed music.  NOPE.
• Finally, the well meaning help with everything after practice parent.  I understand the good intentions but, again, they are not supposed to be on that field and so, I politely thank them and ask them to let their child put the stuff away.  

2020dad posted:

Why is there a right and wrong here?   Again I see some taking some kind of elitist eye rolling position of superiority here.  Why do you care if a parent wants to watch his kid practice.  Way back in the 80's and 90's I had open practices.  Even basketball in the gym!   Always told parents they were welcome.  Always told parents in baseball to feel free to listen in on post game talk.  I never did that childish stupid thing (it's only fair I get to be judgmental too since it seems to be the thing to do) of taking the team way down the line or way out into the outfield.  He my post game either in the dugout or if we had to vacate I took them out to a shady spot nearby outside the field.  I always told parents "I shouldn't be saying anything to your kids I wouldn't want you to hear".  Never minded parents hanging out by the dugout and listening in.  Why would I have something to hide???  It's common sense a parent shouldn't want to watch practice????   Why???   Come on people let's get over ourselves.  To each his own. 

Not right or wrong just or anything to hide, just the team doing team stuff... they don’t need an audience. Again common sense and I would even add courtesy. 

I never had closed practices in basketball or baseball.  I agree with 2020DAD, there is nothing I should say to their kid that they should not hear.  If I do then I am not the coach I need to be.  We did go to the outfield so that the other team could not hear us not so our parents could not hear us.  I sometimes would say we should have beat that team or their pitcher was not as good as we made him look.  I didn't need them to hear it and give them any more motivation.  I have had my kid tell me when I asked what the coach said "he said that is between our team and not to tell our parents what was said."  Doesn't work with me.  That is cult language.  Don't tell anyone what we talk about or do.  That is just wrong.  I know many coaches don't want the parents to hear because of their cursing.  That is wrong also.  If it is language that is not acceptable in the classroom it should not be accepted on the field, court or any other HS sports facility. 

I disagree Old_School.  What is uncourteous about watching practice?  What are you doing that you don't want the parents to see.  I understand them not being right there on the fence or being beside the dugout.  But if they are watching from the stands or like here from 100 feet away on a hillside what are they interfering with or uncourteously doing?  Again, some guys just love baseball or football and just want to watch guys catch balls, hit balls, pitch, run plays, etc.  i know there are the parents that are overbearing but if they are doing it from a distance, what does it matter?

I can honestly say I'm shocked to hear that there are parents who go watch practice....and really surprised to hear that at some schools it's common and it's not just "that dad" that is doing it.    As someone else mentioned above, I would have done it once.....and my son would have never let me hear the end of it.  I can't imagine there are many coaches who like it....and even fewer who would encourage it.   Truthfully, this may be the strangest thread I've ever read in all the years I've been  coming on this site.  If you'd have asked me I'd have said with almost 100% certainty that there weren't parents watching HS practices.   I guess they're right.....you learn something every day

^^^^ 

I learn more things every time I read this thread.  Having "stuff" that is just for the team is really a coach creating a cult?  Didn't know that.  Having the team go out to the outfield is somehow stupid or crazy or ...?  (I understand that a point was being made with that remark.)  

Unfortunately, a part of me wants to know why you, as a parent, feel the need to be in every practice, discussion, team event ...   A part of me wants to know  why you don't believe that a coach is a professional and as with a professional trust them to do their jobs.  My gosh, give the kid some breathing room.  In my years as a coach I have never said one thing to a player or team that I would not say to their parents.  Still, why does the parent feel that they have a right to be in that gathering to listen?  It might be that instead of a cult, it is a team and therefore something special between players and coaches and not parents.  In my opinion, that is just fine.  When and if your son goes off to college, you won't be there for any of those things and your son will be just fine.  

I'll wrap this up by saying that because a HS coach does not do things the way you did it doesn't mean that the HS Coach is wrong nor does it mean that you were wrong.  It was simply different.  There doesn't have to be some covert reasoning for coaches wanting that special relationship that only coaches and players develop during a high school season.  

As a player I don’t remember practices being all that exciting. I had no desire to watch as a parent. If something interesting or amsuing occurred at practice my kids told me. 

PitchingFan posted:

I disagree Old_School.  What is uncourteous about watching practice?  What are you doing that you don't want the parents to see.  I understand them not being right there on the fence or being beside the dugout.  But if they are watching from the stands or like here from 100 feet away on a hillside what are they interfering with or uncourteously doing?  Again, some guys just love baseball or football and just want to watch guys catch balls, hit balls, pitch, run plays, etc.  i know there are the parents that are overbearing but if they are doing it from a distance, what does it matter?

I think it is more a matter of parents coming to practice to see other kids not hit well, make errors, and watch their kids perform better in practice. They then tell their kids that they are better and should be playing, should be batting higher, etc. Kid makes an error at practice and now starts looking at the parent after every ball hit to him or after every round of BP.

I only see it creating more problems. Kids talk about things at practice. School, games, jokes, girls, parties, etc. Part of going to HS. Now they have to watch what they say at their own practices because there is a parent siting in the stands next to the dugout. 

I find it strange and I don't see any benefit to it. Let the guys do their thing and when it comes time for games go nuts. 

I think it is more a matter of parents coming to practice to see other kids not hit well, make errors, and watch their kids perform better in practice. They then tell their kids that they are better and should be playing, should be batting higher, etc. Kid makes an error at practice and now starts looking at the parent after every ball hit to him or after every round of BP.

 

I coached from t-ball thru Junior High.....this is the biggest reason why I wasn't a fan of parents hanging around watching practice

My first reaction when I read through this thread was who has time to go to practices?  

Let me make it clear.  I do not go but my son would not care.  I also believe that some of you think that all coaches are perfect and they are not.  I can't believe that some of you would believe that all coaches are professionals.  A grown man that curses or talks down to young men is not a professional.  All except a few, and never a baseball coach, have my sons played for great men and coaches.  But being in the coaching profession in HS, I know that is not the truth for all coaches.  I watched a coach at a Catholic school in our region curse his players and shove one at a basketball game last week.  The parent sitting near me said it is just how he coaches and he is successful.  I do not believe you can be successful enough to curse a player or shove a player and get by with it.  I do hold to the concept that something is wrong if a coach is telling his players not to tell the parents what the coach says.  What could you possibly be saying that the parents do not need to know?  Re-read my comment and I said cult language not cult.  Understand in my world there are a lot of organizations that have cult language but I won't go there. 

Again, I do not go to the practices other than if I have business with the coach or to help set up a concession stand but I do not have a problem with parents who do as long as they are quiet and keeping their distance.  When I coached, I had a grandfather who would come hang out in the stands every now and then.  Never knew he was there other than seeing him.  I would go speak to him every so often.  He said if you don't want me here just let me know.  I just love baseball and can't coach anymore.  Just love the atmosphere of being at practice.  I got that. 

I think so many coaches have had bad parents that they are not willing to let parents around or help even when they need it.  I also think parents have had so many bad coaches they don't trust coaches.  I think there has to be a happy medium.  We moved here last year and I trust my son's coaches.  No reason to not.

College is a different scenario.  They become grown men when they go to college and are responsible for themselves.  When they are in high school, my children are my responsibility.  I will say that my middle son's coaches always invited me to come watch practice and even had me sit in the dugout during practices if I was in town since my son went to college 6 hours away.  My son's future school has already said if you are ever in town let us know and you can come over since you won't get to see him much.  That is a great coaching staff.

PitchingFan posted:

I never had closed practices in basketball or baseball.  I agree with 2020DAD, there is nothing I should say to their kid that they should not hear.  If I do then I am not the coach I need to be.  We did go to the outfield so that the other team could not hear us not so our parents could not hear us.  I sometimes would say we should have beat that team or their pitcher was not as good as we made him look.  I didn't need them to hear it and give them any more motivation.  I have had my kid tell me when I asked what the coach said "he said that is between our team and not to tell our parents what was said."  Doesn't work with me.  That is cult language.  Don't tell anyone what we talk about or do.  That is just wrong.  I know many coaches don't want the parents to hear because of their cursing.  That is wrong also.  If it is language that is not acceptable in the classroom it should not be accepted on the field, court or any other HS sports facility. 

I disagree Old_School.  What is uncourteous about watching practice?  What are you doing that you don't want the parents to see.  I understand them not being right there on the fence or being beside the dugout.  But if they are watching from the stands or like here from 100 feet away on a hillside what are they interfering with or uncourteously doing?  Again, some guys just love baseball or football and just want to watch guys catch balls, hit balls, pitch, run plays, etc.  i know there are the parents that are overbearing but if they are doing it from a distance, what does it matter?

Great post!  For the record I said what I said about taking kids to the outfield out of frustration.  I get so tired of people being so judgmental and closed minded I said that tongue in cheek.  Personally I just didn't want to walk that far lol.  But you gave good reasons why you did.  And really it is about the why after all.  I just think most take kids out there for different reasons.  

My last post in this thread.  Personally, I limit my talks in the outfield to 5 minutes or less.  Typically, we hand out "bursts."   A single "burst" is one clap done by the team at the same time.  Two bursts, ... Three Bursts.  This is as much team building as anything else.  We do that as a positive win or lose.  Sometimes we hand out a "negative burst" where everyone puts their hands together and on the count of three pull their hands apart real fast.  This is usually in fun for thinks like falling down rounding a base, ... and kids take great pride in getting either the burst or negative burst.  To me that is special and a team thing.  I limit any negative comments in that 5 minutes to one thing.  We have time in practice the next day to delve into negatives and fix things.  Finally, if I mess up, the kids can give me a "strawberry" which is what some might call the "Bronx cheer" where they make that dumb sound with their mouths.  We wrap up with some comment about our overall goals for either the game or season.  Not rocket science.  Hey, thanks for all of the great discussion.