Perfect parent

None of us are "perfect" in anything. At least I'm not! I do think I'm a "good" baseball parent.

I think a "good" baseball parent is one who loves and supports their child regardless of their abilities. I have two kids with one being a better athelete and one a better student. They also have many other differences. Celebrate their successes and encourage them when they don't reach their goals.

I think a good baseball parent provides opportunities for the child to be the best they can be. Each family has differing limitations due to finances, etc.

A good baseball parent is there in the concession stand, working gates, sweeping bleechers, working the field - doing whatever is needed, which is usually a lot.

A good baseball parent is supportive of other baseball parents and players. We do this because we love our child and we love the game of baseball. I enjoy being around other "baseball people". I share in my son's enjoyment of a great play or watching an awesome pitcher, or someone who is hitting the ball like crazy.

A good baseball parent knows they are fortunate and blessed. You remember this even after you're frustrated over a call, seen another parent behave like a 5 year old, or felt your blood pressure go up from a poster on the HSBBW. In the end it's about the kids and baseball.

Not to be redundant but there is no "perfect parent"

I am with lafmom

Fungo

There is no such thing just as there is no perfect coach or teacher or anything else. Being a parent or in this case a baseball parent is something unique. It is sort of a learn as you go proposition. We have read on this site opinions about parents role in their sons baseball experience. There has been discussion about what some call the "obnoxious" parent. Those who some perceive as "obnoxious" probably feel they are helping their son so it is a matter of from what perspective you look at it. Being a coach for many years and a parent baseball has been a binding force between my son and me. I was the as some describe as the "unsociable" one who when people started complaining would go out in left field and watch. I never criticized the coach. when my son would complain to me about this or that I would politely tell him to shut up as I was not the one that had the answers. Yes there were times when I thought he got the short end of the stick but that is life. He would figure it out. sure I was there and am still there to hit him some balls and threw BP but it was and still is him who says "I need some work" so sometimes it is him that drags me out. The college season starts soon and I will try to make the trips. He can look up in the stands and see me there even the times when he does not start and is on the bench.Afterwards we go out and have a bite to eat and talk. I say "How is school going"?

In many ways baseball has made me a better (but not perfect)parent-

Long road trips, airport delays, grabbing some lunch under a tree in between tournament games....we have had our best conversations.

Interesting topic. I second both lafmom and Will. I am painfully aware that I am not perfect. I have regrets about the way I reacted when my two boys were younger. They were both fine players yet I thought it was my role to be the tough guy with them and was especially bad at yelling at them on the field when they made a mistake. My older son couldn't handle it and he eventually gave up the game. My younger son could handle it but set me straight after a game many years ago.

Think about it, learning the hard way from a very young person. I have learned to bite my lip and try very hard now to only discuss game things after games in private. The lesson was learned too late for my older son however.

In one sense there is perfection in life. In my eyes, I can see many fine baseball attributes in my son who is still playing, but it is his heart that truly sets him apart. Thus, in my eyes he is perfect for me. The nice thing is, even with my many flaws, I believe he feels the same way about me.

The obvious attributes of the “Perfect baseball parent” would be baseball savvy, love of their kids and the game, have a large family of all boys that are 5 tool players with great make-up and IQ, live down south in good weather and certainly be filthy rich.

Since few of us have what it takes to be perfect, the best we can do is play the hand we’ve been dealt the best we can, loving your kid and the game is probably as good a place to start as any.

Iafmom said: I think a "good" baseball parent is one who loves and supports their child regardless of their abilities

This is the "good parent" in all aspects of the child's life.

None of us know whether our son's will be good enough to make it to the "Big Show", but as parents that is not our function. There are professionals to determine that. But we as parents "must" believe in our children, no matter what it takes, until all avenues have been explored and all opportunities have been exhausted. Without that at the core of your son's basic foundation his competitive chances to achieve the highest level of his potential cannot be realized.

Let your son, find out for himself the truth of his chances. Your job as a parent is to believe in him until that day comes when all his chances are exhausted and he has to hang up the cleats because he is not good enough or he does makes it, if that is the outcome.

Believe me there will be plenty of people who try to discourage you, and him, with all their negative admonishments...we see that sort of thing happen here quite often.

A "good parent" stands up for their son when they need to and makes sure that he is receiving fair treatment. But they also are not afraid to "learn" both the strengths and weaknesses of their child without ranker. After all there can be no improvement without understanding what skills need to be worked on.

But a "good parent" never gives up on their child...period.

I failed the perfect parent test from conception. Didn't provide good enough genes. Now he has to find a way to overcome that.

CaDad,

I've read enough of your posts to say with great certainty that overall, your son did a fine job of picking his parents.

Takes their kid fishing. Takes him for a hike in the woods and points out the little creatures. Watches a ball game with their son and never brings up their game. Stresses his academics and helps him with his homework. Takes him to church. Never tells him "you need to hit today". Never turns him down when he asks to go hit. Never compares him to other players. His best friend in defeat and gives him his space in victory. Whoops that butt when he needs it and hugs him when he doesnt. Encourages him in everything that he does. Supports him not matter what the odds. NEVER GIVES HIM EXCUSES BUT OFFERS HIM SOLUTIONS. Teaches him to respect those he does not think he needs. Because one day he will. Teaches him that baseball is a mirror of life. What you put in you will get out. What you do not put in you can not expect to get out. Makes sure he understands that baseball is a game and it is supposed to be fun. Then goes out and makes sure that he or she does everthing to remember this rule because he wont follow it if you dont. I could go on and on but Ill stop. Just my opinions.

Coach May ...

I love your thoughts on this. You have seen it from both angles ... being the parent and being the coach. Your description was almost poetic for me. Thanks for sharing.

Coach May, I agree with FBM. Perfectly said