Vodka Cake by Foster Brooks
Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
4 large eggs
Nuts
1 bottle Vodka
2 cups of dried fruit
Sample the Vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Vodka
again. To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and
drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a
large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point
it's best to make sure the Vodka is still OK. Try another cup... just in
case. Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and
chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
Pick the dried fruit up off floor. Mix on the turner. If the fried
druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the Vodka to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt.
Or something. Check the Vodka again as it apeers to b vaporating away!.
Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a
spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven.
Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to
beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window. Finish
the Vodka and wipe counter with the cat....
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