Take the time to think about the future

Oh how I so agree. So many of the young men are caught up in what Division it is. And you are right guys get drafted out of all divisions. So many guys on D1 that are maybe borderline will sit and they could play somewhere else. My son is included in this. Ive posted before that he has a few very good D3 schools calling him weekly and he is considering going to a JC. He says its the school size that he doesnt like at these schools . 1500-2500. He wants to be in a bigger school.And being realistic seems to be a tought thing for some of these kids and probably some of their parents also.I too felt this way before the rules changed. I think the rule change just made it harder for the borderline kids to get on D1 rosters. Education, education, can not stress enought that that is the bottom line. Get your degree, play some ball and who cares where it is if your wanted, can compete at that level and get a degree.and if your good enought get ashot at the next level.

Fan

All too often I hear a player or parent say "this is where I want to go to college"----Many sad parts here---first can the young man get in academically---secondly do they need a player at his position--- thirdly is he talentwise good enough to even be considered for that school


Folks you need to be realistic---YES-- follow the dream but also put a "real situation" in your back pocket so that the young man has a place to go and not be out in the cold when the bell sounds in September---


PArents/players---open your eyes and see what is around you---you do not have to be a genius---it is all on the internet beginning here on this site--- DO NOT BE LAZY--- DO SOME DUE DILIGENCE

My son, of course, wanted to play DI. He signed with a GREAT DII. It was hard letting go of that dream, but once he made his mind up, there has been no looking back - absolutely no regrets. He is really excited about where he is going. He is glad the whole process of deciding is over. He is working hard and excited about the prospect of his HS team doing great. Playing baseball was more important to him than the size of the school. And, we were lucky, because the school is also great academically. In the end, it all worked out great, despite not being DI.

Its not just baseball though, I have talked to two football players this week that I know. They both say . . .but I want to go DI. I just say "doesn't everybody , just don't close any doors.

Great first post, tr.

Regarding the second post, some kids set different priorities with regard to college. Some decide to go to a certain school because of academics or other factors which are of higher priority to them. They do so knowing that they may not have optimized their baseball opportunities, but are willing to pay that price.

I have a question. When you say do not close any doors, when should my son let these coaches know he thinks he is going to a jc?one of them told me that they usually dont get an answer from kids until after financial aid package is done, whuch would be around MArch with the Fafsa etc.I feel that he is leaving these guys hanging, but also amstill hoping he willchange his mind. My son has a 3.6 GPA, had a 3.8 this semester.Over 1700 on his SATs.I loved the D3 school that wants him. I love everything about it, including the baseball but not exclusively all about the baseball. I dont think he will play D1 even two years down ,although he is not set on D1 he would go to a D2, he just wants a bigger school. he says if he was only looking at the baseball side of it he would go to this one D3. he feels it will be too small and not enough to do in surrounding area(like they have anytime with school and baseball). The JC coach and my son met, he asked my son to play and told him he had a good shot at getting significant playtime as a freshmen etc, etc.I dont want to close any doors at all. but eventually have to be honest with the coaches.He has also expressed concern over the amt. of money the D3 s are even with some help academically. He feels its too much money for his dad and I to spend when he is not 100% sure of it. I think if a D2 school asked him to play he would go for it. there is one looking at him and told him they liked him but no early signs at that school. they said no early signs they are waiting until Aprl.I guess he isnt ready to let go of it at this time. one of the D3 coaches told me my son was a fringe D1 at this time, meaning he is right on the boarder with his skills etc, even so go smaller and play. time will tell.

The title of this thread is about taking your time to think about your future. I understand this to mean that the decision to where one wants to go to school and play baseball and get and education should be carefully thought out. No one should rush to a quick decision no matter what the situation.

Texan brings up a good point. Many choose schools based on what they want from an overall experience and are willing to pay the price. Some may not be 100% happy with their baseball situation, but love every minute of their school life and that may have been what attracted them in the first place. Some also may be very happy with their baseball situation, but not very happy with where they are going to school. Sometimes we just assume that a player transfers solely due to baseball, it is not always, IMO, for that reason.

The reality is, in any program, a coach only needs 9 to play. The player that may sit at a D1 program may also sit at a D2,D3,JUCO, NAIA. So ones decision should not be based on baseball only, which is what I feel happens too often. My son was basically happy with the baseball program at the school he attended, but I can tell you that he loved where he went to school just as much as baseball. After many long hours put in on the field, he was very happy to leave that behind for the moment and enjoy other things that all college kids should experience. That's why he went to college. I am not so sure how happy he would have been if he wasn't happy off of the field. Many of the players that he played with were not all starters, some it bothered and others it didn't. I think the overall consensus was they all just loved being there and sometimes that can be much more important than starting every game. For those who wanted more, they moved on, for most, they stayed. It's important to remember that every player has a role and it is usually not as a starter.

Everyones child is different, everyones child has different expectations, we can't expect them to all want the same things. It is very important to discuss what exactly your son wants out the college experience.

Some of you may not understand the above, but you will someday when your son goes off to school.

IMO, I think that too many players place more emphasis where they are going to play than where they are going to attend school. A player has to find the right fit where he will be happy, with the entire experience.

If it's all about baseball, during recruiting it may be beneficial to find out how the coach uses his players who do not play in every game, do they sit on the bench day after day, are they still being prepared properly even if playing lessor role than he desires, that is very important.

Didn't mean to ramble on or get off track, but the bottom line is take your time to think about it, all of it and find what is best for you.

Don't really know what this thread is about?

But if you hit or get kids out pitching, they will find you.

TPM - great post. My son's high school coach played college and professional baseball, and he has two sons who are currently college baseball head coaches. His advice to my son is to find a place to play where you would be happy even if you were not playing ball there. This echoes what you are saying.

Finding the right school with the right baseball is not always easy. My son is narrowing down his choices. He has found schools he likes that he probably would have never have considered if it weren't for baseball. The resources available on this site have been instrumental in helping him in his pursuit.

tiger paw mom

thanks you made some good points. It is a hard decision and they need to take their time. Its just hard as a parent when you think one thing seems like a good fit in all areas and your son is still young and doesnt see the whole picture. the point of the post was the oringinal one said kids get hung up on the divisions and arent looking at the whole picture and i was responding to that. Im not aiming this at you but sometimes people with not a lot of experience like myself will say something on this web and then some people respond like were stupid and sometimes (and im not being over sensitive) maybe they understand everything, but their are a lot of things to think about as the original poster said and its not easy to find everything and it all fits. to make sure you dont close doors too early . I just am struggling with the fact that i thought we had found a good fit and my son changed his mind in the middle of it. Im happy for the kids in this post that have found their schools and they feel it meets all their needs.I wish them the best.I hope and pray my son is hapy with where he ends up going also.

fanofgame,

I was trying to make some points about finding the right "fit". Although my son went to a D1 school, I agree it is not for everyone. So often parents or players post when first starting out, that all they want to do is attend a D1 school. Decisions have to be made based on the whole picture, everything, but that is just my opinion. All sides have to be considered. It is not an easy process for anyone, there are many things to think about and consider, D1,D2,D3, JUCO,etc.

I understand why many players want to play at D1 schools, but eveyone should be open minded to all opportunities. If the object is making the team and being a starter from the moment you arrive, that's not realistic on most college teams. Don't think that not choosing a D1 means more playtime. Don't forget that you also have to go to school and pass. Academically there are many D2,D3 schools that are more difficult than some D1 schools. Then there is the fact about economics. I know some players who remained in this state and took the D1 scholarship and used their state money, but might have played more at another division.

I can't imagine how difficult it must be for a player to have to choose from D1,D2,D3,JUCO. Some players fit into this scenerio and that must be very difficult to sort through the differences on scholarships, academics, resources, etc. Just don't be hasty in ignoring all.

Our players need our guidance. If we as parents think that possibly they have found the right fit, and to them they haven't, chances are their instincts are better than ours. They see things alot better than we give them credit for.

Remember, they are the ones that will be going there, not us.

The best part is about what Eaglesdad has posted. Baseball will bring you to opportunities that one might have never considered, that's the key, leave every door open.

As an educator, I will aslo add that we all have different academic abilities. Although going to a four year college is a wonderful goal, not everyone is cut out for that right after high school. Be honest. There is also a lot of difference between academics at all colleges too - some are tougher than others. An "academic fit" should be very high on the list IMO.

Good post, TPM.

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Good points.

There is so often a difficult balance/compromise between...Honest reality and dreams, expectations and goals of parents and son, the hard but natural split that occurs physically, emotionally and philosophically at this time in life. It is well worth remembering the perfect fit is only what works for YOUR family, and for your son, not for the general public or the HSBBW. And IMO that can be particularly hard to live with when a decade of stretching for dreams...is shifted and the realities are put into play and we and our son's are socially judged, categorized and "defined" by our choices. Particularly if our son's were high profile.

It may ease your agony of choice to realize that try as you might, most often even the most "perfect fit" will not exactly be what you had expected. There are no perfect fits where employer valued grades come easy, where coaches give everyone a starting slot, where all players are drafted in the top 3 rounds. Your son will still have to bring the goods and "come of age" facing challenges both expected and unexpected. And that too is a major part of his education (and yours). And that part of the equation is much harder to anticipate, much harder to understand, and much harder to appreciate.

IMO, I believe that while you may agonize the choices (and we ALL do, and well you should) In the end his success will depend as much upon him, as it will his choice of schools or baseball programs. In the end your son IS the single biggest factor in the success of this process. And you must believe in your parenting and therefore in your son...In his passion, his talent, his desire, his willingness to sacrifice, his focus, his work ethic and in his character.

As was mentioned in another thread, Maybe it is indeed my bias...Maybe it's an overreaction to a shift I see to media driven "win at all cost" society we are being force fed, one where labels and celebrity are more important than skills and character. But IMO in the end, by the measure of reality not the media...our sons are not only where they play ball, they are not only where they go to school. Bottom line, IMO, our sons will only be as successfull as the skills and the character that they bring.

44
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The criteria my son had were well thought out. 1st priority was location. Vegas at the top of the list. Next was a decent degree program and then a shedule that included top ranked schools. It had to be D1 but we also sent feelers out to other categories of schools from JC to D2. No D3 because we needed the BB scholarship money. Our best offer came from a D2 who had seen son in Long Island. That was the only college that actually saw son pitch in person. It was a great school but cold weather and a short schedule killed that.
In short he had to go to a school that was in a place he could enjoy himself with lots of things to do. There were some schools that we talked to but including a JC that had gone D1 WS 4 years in a row. It was in a rural area and my son would not take the offer.

We had no criteria at all---the bottom line for us was to find where he wanted to be and we will make it work---IT WAS HIS LIFE AND HIS FUTURE HE WAS WORKING ON !!!


Bobblehead---was Vegas for you or your son?


It almost sounds like you dictated the situation or at least tried to!

TR I have never been to Vegas but he played basket ball there twice while in HS. I don't gamble but have 3 casinos within 15 mins.
You don't dictate to my son. i know what he likes and he told me what he wanted.
After trip 1 to Vegas he asked me to research the BB program. I told him it was decent and the schedule was as good as it gets. The 2nd time in Vegas he had an unofficial visit set up with the coordinator. He left a DVD. He actually walked miles to do the visit.
After the dead period they called at 4:00 pm expecting he would be home from HS. I got the call from the coach who evaluated his DVD. He said he was a grade A prospect and that they were very interested in him coming to UNLV. From that point everything looked good but they took a JC transfer instead. We had not stopped marketing so we moved to his second choice. I had never been to Charleston SC either. Guys who went their said they didn't want to come home after they graduated. My son had played there 3 times in tournaments and loved it.
I think for him location was #1. A couple days ago I asked him if he still felt the same and he said even more so. He loves the local gator that lives in the swamp behind the ball park and those black widows that live in the ball shed. His friends are amazed at some of the things he tells them. By the way he has been back for 12 days and if anyone sees him would you send him home. His Mom and I would like to see him before he goes back on Sunday.

quote:

Originally posted by BobbleheadDoll:
By the way he has been back for 12 days and if anyone sees him would you send him home. His Mom and I would like to see him before he goes back on Sunday.

Yup

tiger paw mom, very good points,

observer 44, I always enjoy your points,

Lots of good reads on this thread and some very good points. I think what tiger paw mom says and a couple other posters,the decision is ultimately the players, where he thinks he fits and in that decision he will have to bring his stuff to the table where ever that will be, he will have to make the grade on and off the field .i also agree with observer 44 when he says a lot of pressure about where the kid is going from the outside, People ask all the time what school your playing at and if you mention a smaller school they act like its nothing.some people have no clue that for our boys to go ANYWHERE to play and go to school it is going to be hard. And it is also a great accomplishment for these boys to be able to play anywhere after highschool. My sons summer coach says "it is a privelage to play collge ball"because a lot of boys have no options at all after highschool and will hang their cleats up. My son loves the game of baseball, it is a passion and it will probably be one of the things that will help him stay focused on school as mentioned in a earlier post.I guess like said by tiger paw my son probably knows best in his own heart.I also want to say one thing about original start of this thread their will be a lot of players who dont do their homework and are only looking at high profile schools that will have no where to play come Sep.As stated do your homework and be realistic.

BBHdoll: My son seriously considered the Citadel and I love Charleston. He's not going there and now I'm a little happier about the decision now that I know about the black widows .

No one has been attacked by a BW yet in 2 1/2 years. My son hates spiders but he has learned to face his fears. Coach makes them sweep the duggout thourghly befoe they hit the field.
One day the croc/aligator was sunning himself on the campus lawn.
The Citadel is a great school. My son likes College of Charleston as well. He said if he wasn't were he is that would be a great college to attend. He also like Florida State but Charleston is his second home now. He went back yesterday (SUN).
We personally are very happy about his choice.

If a college student-athlete measures the success of their college experience solely by how much playing time they are getting....it's going to be a long 4 years for all but a few. There are many things that go into making for a good college experience for the student-athlete. Our daughter (a D1 athlete) has been a part-time starter. While she could have played a lot more at a DIII, she loves her current coaches, has met some great teammates, enjoys the practices, loves the classes,....and is getting a great education. She knew going in that she would be a "role" player, that she would be challenged just to get onto the field, and yet has had an overall great experience.

The education you get as a bench player working hard for your playing time (however limited) is part of the overall education you get as a student-athlete. I would like to think she is better prepared for the "real world" than some of the players whose atheltic skills always will keep them on the field. The real world doesn't work that way in my opinion.

Success in college for the student-athlete is not always measured in how much playing time they get. There are a great many other life lessons to be learned.

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quote:

Success in college for the student-athlete is not always measured in how much playing time they get. There are a great many other life lessons to be learned.

44
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quote:

Success in college for the student-athlete is not always measured in how much playing time they get. There are a great many other life lessons to be learned.

All the previous posts are great and most agree that although baseball can open the doors the young men have to feel at home at the entire college not just the baseball field.

Obviously these decisions are unique and have personal circumstances for each family. With my son, a high school sophmore, a couple of my concerns are maturity and the fact that he is an only child. He tends to be a little immature and very close to both my wife and myself. Can he make the right decisions on his own? Will he get homesick? Will he study enough on his own to be succesful in the class room? These and other factors make me, only half jokingly, feel like I have to implement a two hour rule. A school within two hours so he can run home if needed and I can run to school if needed. I know he has two more years to mature but I don't believe in miracles.

Reading posts on this site and following some sound advice is the first step in a long process that will hopefully lead to the correct decision for him.
My son is a great kid, whom I wouldn't trade for Albert Pujois (if you throw in Scott Rolen I'll think about it), but alot of work, why should this be any different.

All kidding aside the fact is that this decision, like most, are unique to each family.

fillsfan,

I can understand your thoughts about wishing your son would choose a college close to home. My son is in his 4th year of college, and he decided fairly early in his college decision process that he wanted to stay in-state, with a fairly easy commute home.

He ended up 90 minutes away (with a car), which was just about perfect...we could drive down for his home baseball games, and he could come home for a weekend (outside of baseball season). Of course, as time went on he didn't choose to come home very often. But in our family's case, it was nice to have the opportunity to make a somewhat gradual transition to moving away from home.

Julie

MN-Mom,

90 minutes sounds about perfect. Close enough to watch his games and for him to come home if he desires. Like you said it allows a somewhat gradual separation if needed.

He is still over two years away, lets hope his baseball and his actions allow this dream of his to become a reality. Thanks.

Why does your son have to find a school so you can see him play?

It is their life not yours !!!

I truly think my thinking is different than most but the young son/daughter need to be happy where he/she is for himself/herself not Mom and Dad

in our case, it would be nice if he chooses a college within a couple of hours so we can see him play. I've put an incredible amount of time and effort into his baseball life so far, and I would love to see the benefits of that in college.

Don't get me wrong, the "incredible amount of time and effort" has been some of my most rewarding time spent in life, as both his coach and dad. But honestly, I would feel miserable if I couldn't watch him from the stands in college.

That said, it is his decision. I know I typed alot of "I"s in the above paragraph. It is about him, not me. I understand that, 100%. But I guess its hard to let go of something that you've been a part of for so long. Maybe moreso because I've coached him from t-ball to Legion, and the comaradarie with the team has always been special.

TR,
I never said he had to go to a school where I could see him play. I said that based upon his personal makeup, at this point, I think it would be best for him to go to a school within a couple of hours from home. Seeing him play would be a positive, for me, consequence of that.
In a perfect situation he will go to a college that fits him, personally, academically and basebally.
(a new word, pass it on)!!