Some wisdom from Larry the Cable Guy
1. Life isn't like a box of chocolates, it's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.
2. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
3. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
4. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
5. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
6. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.
7. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
9. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What the he11 happened?"
10. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
11. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
12. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
13. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
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